A/N: This chapter has been on mind forever and I just love how Adam Pascal who plays Rodger from RENT sounds quite like Raul Esparza. I watched 2008 version of Chess and realized both of them are in it. I feel that the episode Undiscovered Country was way too short. There were certain scenes that cut to the next day and I really wanted to know more. It felt rushed. So here it is. My take on the One Song Glory but in the eyes of Rafael Barba.

Takes place during 19x13 The Undiscovered Country.

After telling Maggie to leave the room Rafael Barba knew he had to end the pain. Not just the pain of the infant in front of him separated from the world by a plastic box but also for mother and father and the numerous others. His own parents wouldn't be able to hold him, the hospital staff advising that it could hurt him further. The warm tears that had formed in his eyes spilled over to his cheeks. This was now an obligation.

He had been in this position before and had made the wrong choice. He couldn't repeat that mistake. While his brain screamed at him advising him of the soon aftermath that would take place, his heart urged him to stop this boy's suffering.

There was right and wrong, in most cases but this was wrapped in shades of gray. Jack McCoy's brief conversation did nothing to still his mind. He couldn't sleep or eat and the suggestion of his liquor cabinet wouldn't suffice. There wasn't enough alcohol in the world to run from the demons that would haunt him for the rest of his life.

Daily he thought of his father and his agonizing end. If there was a way to turn back time and had the chance to redo the scenario he would have put his father on hospice and go out with dignity rather than wither away into nothing. Why didn't he listen to those doctors, to the rest of his family? His condition was never going to get better. The diabetic coma had put is father into renal failure. It was a painful way to go.

It was a selfish decision and it bothered him for years. His father had destroyed his own marriage and every relationship with everyone around him. Rafael never got the support from his so-called father. He was a glorified sperm donor, an alcoholic, a self-righteous man who tormented his mother for years. After he passed Rafael wondered if he kept him alive as some subconscious payback and he hated himself for feeling that way. The many years of ruminating had put things into perspective. By no means could he allow anyone to suffer a similar fate.

Rafael had carried this regret for almost over eighteen years. He couldn't do what he did to his father to another person. No matter the consequences he needed to put this child at peace.

One switch of a button and he could let the boy finally rest. Rafael did a prayer of the cross over his chest. His finger hesitantly rested against the switch. He looked again at the infant, his heart was breaking in front of him. One life that caused so much burden. It was unfair as getting a bad had of cards. To being alive but dead at the same time. What kind of life was that?

Barba held his breath and lets his fingers press down on the switch. The moral weight lifting off his shoulder. He watched the rise and fall of the infant's chest stop, the ventilator finally at rest. In a matter of minutes, the monitors started to flash and the loud beeping echo through the unit. He let out the stored in breath, saying silent prayer as he exited the room.

The automatic doors to the hospital opened greeting him with the familiar icy New York City weather. Rafael looked out into the quiet evening street, thoughts racing through his head. He began to walk down the street, to clear his head, seeing each breath he released into the winter air.

This was it.

(Rafael/Rodger)

One trial glory, one trial before I go
Glory, one trial to leave behind
Find one case, one last defense
Glory, from the pretty boy front man

Who wasted opportunity
One trial, he had the court at his feet
Glory, in the eyes of a young girl
A young girl, find glory

Beyond the New York City lights
One trial, before the regrets
Glory, on another empty file

Time flies, time dies
Glory, one phase of glory
One phase of glory, glory

Find glory in a crime so cruel
Cruel enough to retire, to die down the shame

Find, one plea, to please them above
Glory, from the soul of a young man

A young man, find the one reason
Before the media takes control
Glory, before the death threats
One trial to redeem this empty life

Time flies and then
No need to endure anymore
Time dies

He knew this would be the last night of calm before the storm. Before the newspapers came out with the headlines labeling him a baby killer. His reputation would be ruined. All the good he had done would be overlooked and forgotten. Soon people around him would change their opinions about him and his friends would start to distance themselves from him. The office would be buzzing about the scandal and soon he would be sitting in the courtroom, only this time he would be on the other side.

Yes, what he did was reckless. Technically by the law it is considered murder. In all the law books he has read in his life there were no if, ands, or buts.

There was a high possibility he could be going to jail. If the jury would convict him he could be facing a lot of time in a prison cell. One trial could destroy the life he had built for himself. His intentional lateral move he did six years ago would now become a screeching halt.

His solo was the admission to the world of what he couldn't put into a simple sentence. His own escape from the world. The realization that he needed to do so much more. That he can make a bigger difference in humanity. His time being an Assistant District Attorney was over. Every witness he had put on the stand, every cross-examination and each defendant he had prosecuted contributed to his decision.

Rafael took another icy gasp. Would the police drag him out of his apartment in the middle of the night? In the morning he would soon face his peers. He could imagine Liv's reaction to all of this. Hopefully she could forgive him in due time. He probably would go back to his apartment and watch the sun come up.

For now, he wanted to stay outside, stay numb. Tomorrow would be a whole other world.

Thank you for reading. I really loved putting this chapter together. Please leave a review and feel free to leave any suggestions and idea on future chapters.