(A/N: So before we start let me tell you a little about the story. So Marinette is super depressed and something happened months before all of it started. Adrien has both his parents and lives a happy life. Marinette gets Plagg instead of Tikki, and Adrien gets Tikki instead of Plagg. That's about it for now. I'm also gonna start each chapter with a different quote… mostly something related to what that chapter is about. I also update really slowly because of school work and work work… so yea sorry but I have had this idea for a while and I still need to update other stories which I'm working on. I've had this one in progress for a full month. Anyways it's not like anyone is gonna read this but if you did I want to thank you for checking out my stories. I am revising this story so it might not make sense in this next chapter until I revise it.)

All it takes is a beautiful fake smile to hide an injured soul and they will never notice how broken you are. -Robbins William

Broken. That's what I am. That's what I will ever be.

Useless. That's who I am. That's all I will ever be.

Fake Smile. That's all I'll show you. That's all you'll ever see.

Dull Eyes. That's what I don't want you to see, but that's something I can't hide.

Red Eyes. That's what I try to hide with make up, but it's something that can't be easily hidden.

I'm Fine. No I'm not.

I'm dying inside.

Those scars on my arm? You know they aren't what I say they are, you know I'm lying, yet you don't say anything.

I fake a smile.

Yes I do.

I'm dying.

Yes I am.

I'm useless.

Yes I am.

I'm Broken…

Yes I am.

I hear my alarm clock go off and sit up, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I get up outta bed and start getting dressed in a pair of blue light-washed jeans that stops at my ankles, some black and white high tops and a black long-sleeved shirt that has my school's name on the front. I go downstairs and greet my adoptive mother with a smile. She says 'good morning' and I respond with a hum. I pull my sleeves down, feeling self conscious. You need to be perfect, my brain tells me. You can't afford to break in front of your friends, they don't know. But someone does! I argue back to the voice inside my head. You think he cares. I hear with a menacing laugh. No one cares about your sorry ass. I grunt and walk to the school. I find Alya waiting with the boys by the steps. She quickly notices my approaching figure and waves her arms. As I walk closer she comes up and hugs me.

"Hey girl, how'd you sleep?"

"Hey," I say with a small forced smile, "I slept fine thanks."

"So what's up?"

"Nothing much just lots of homework and sewing." I say, my smile falling a little at the lie.

"Mari? You okay, you look upset..." Alya asks looking in my face and holding me by my shoulders.

My facade falls a little. Lie. "I'm fine." That's not enough! Screams the voice in my head. Just let me escape this on my own. I argue. "Don't worry about me, we're gonna be late if we don't get going soon." I say shrugging her off and walking up the steps. She just stays there, confused. Even your own supposedly best friend won't follow you. She's just shocked. Adrien and Nino go up to her both asking if I'm okay.

"She said she's fine but I don't believe her. She's been saying that for the past 8 months."

"I'm sure she would tell us if something was wrong with her." Nino says. Adrien looks at me and silently asks if I'm okay. I look him in the eyes and that's all of an answer he needs I walk away and towards my class. Adrien follows me. I slide into my seat and I feel him slide in next to me, we were the only people in the room. I start to feel tears prickle my eyes and I try to blink them away. I have been crying a lot more lately, for no apparent reason, It might just be me overthinking things to where I start zoning out and crying. I do it all the time. I just need to toughen up. I feel bad for shrugging off Alya like that. My life is such a mess right now. It wasn't like this when I was younger, before my parents disappeared before I was adopted, before I had anxiety before everything. I was smiley, happy, bubbly Marinette, but then something bad happened.

Flashback

"No Dad! Stop!" I cry, begging my father to stop, but he doesn't listen. I cry hard. I tried stopping him, I really did! He wouldn't listen to me. Why won't he listen to me! He shouldn't have done this! Mom's gone because of him and he's gone because he couldn't bare with the pain of what he's done. He left me and he hurt mom. Why did they have to fight in the first place! Why didn't I try harder to stop them?

End Flashback

"-ette. Marinette!" I jump out of my chair effectively taking me out from my thoughts and whip my head up. I flush in embarrassment, Adrien is sitting next to me with a look of concern on his face. I shrug him off.

"I've been calling your name for the past 2 minutes. Please pay attention in my class." Ms. Bustier says a hint of concern in her voice. She looks into my eyes and I give her my 'I'm fine just need some time' look. She gives me an 'it's okay if you wanna go home look'

"Yes ma'am."

"Okay then, let's get back to class." As class continued, my thoughts kept racing. Blankly staring out into space. The bell rings and I jump out of my chair and down the hall. I'm going home. I can't stay. I have been staying at my adoptive mothers house but she is out during the day. I raced through the door after unlocking it. I go into my room and up the stairs to my bed. I jump onto it and curl in a ball. I start crying almost immediately. Why did my life have to be like this? Why did Dad die? Why did Mom die? Why do the people I love the most leave? These questions run through my brain. I get back up deciding to take away my pain. I go into the bathroom to find my razor that I use to cut. I sit on the floor and stare at my arms, I bring the razor over my skin and press down, quickly swiping it across. The blood bubbles and the pain feels exhilarating. I watch as the blood trails down my arms and pools at the end of my elbow. I cut 5 more lines, not deep enough to cut a vein but deep enough to feel the pain and leave the scars. These scars will be a reminder of everything I have been through. Now I know what you're gonna say, "Self harming is a horrible thing to do." or "Stop doing that, you're just looking for attention." Well here is what I have to say to that. No one, but my adoptive mother and Adrien knows that my parents are dead. She was there when it happened, and, she was the one that took hold of me and let me cry in her shoulder. Adrien knows from me, he saw me in a moment of weakness and I told him everything. Alya, who is my best friend, doesn't know what really happened to my parents. Only Adrien knows just how depressed I actually am, but I try to hide everything and the cutting? It helps. You wouldn't understand unless you've done it. Whether you have done it or you are currently it doesn't matter. It takes a lot of mental pain to take that pain and turn it into physical pain. Once I feel satisfied that I have given myself enough pain, I decide to run a bath and wash my cuts before bandaging them. As the water fills up I peel off my clothes and slowly step into it, I feel myself relax slightly, my muscles finally feeling less tense. I sink into the tub until I'm fully underneath the water. As I washed my fresh cuts, still feeling the sting from the pain, the water turns a light pink color. There isn't enough blood to make it a crimson red. I quickly wash my hair, cuts and body. I feel refreshed as I get out of the tub. I start shivering right away, I quickly walk over to my door where my towel is. I wrap it around me and drain the water. I walk to my mirror and open it up, searching for my little tin box full of medical supplies, whenever I need to bandage my cuts. When I finish I walk into my room and start getting dressed into nice comfortable pajamas. My phone buzzes and I pick it up. 5 missed calls and 4 new text messages, all from Adrien.

Adrien :)

Sent 10:47am Hope you're okay Mare.

Sent 10:57am You can talk to me...

Sent 11:39am I got your homework.

Sent 12:20pm I'm here when you're ready.

Oh god he's super worried, but I just need to be alone right now. I don't… I can't. I can't have him find out just what I did. He would be so upset. I ponder this in the silence of the house and decide to play some music while I do what little of today's homework I actually have, to get my mind off of this. I like being alone in the house, when I'm alone I can scream all I want and I have the privacy that I need when I feel the need to cut. Although I don't like sleeping in my room ever since the nightmares started. It started when my parents left. The feeling of being completely and utterly alone taking over me, scared me so much. Now I don't mind it but I still get nightmares from the day they left. I'd wake up covered in sweat with tears rolling down my face. So I stopped sleeping in my room every now and then I would sleep in the living room. I don't feel like sleeping in my room and I know mom will be worried, I am preparing to grab my blanket and comforter since I decided to do my homework downstairs, while watching a movie, when I see a black box just resting there. I open it and a green light appears when the light vanished a black cat looking thing is yawning.

"What are you?" The black thing looks at me.

"Hi, I'm Plagg. Do you have any cheese Marinette?"

I'm confused for a moment before I pick him up and bring him downstairs.

"We've got cheese bread, camembert, and more."

"Cheese heaven!" Plagg screams. I give a little smile. Plagg turns to me and frowns. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing. Umm what are you?" I ask questionally, like how can this thing fly and what exactly is he?

"I'm a kwami. I'll be giving you your super powers."

"Super powers?"

"Yes." And so this creature gives me a long speech about being a superhero.

"Okay, so my miraculous is a ring that I always wear?"

"Basically."

"And my special power is Cataclysm?"

"Yep!"

"All you eat is cheese to replenish your energy?" I question.

"I love ma cheese."

"Okay. "

"Also when you need to transform all you have to do is say 'Plagg claws out.' and to detransform is 'Claws in.' "

"Okay" I smile and give a yawn feeling my eyes start to droop.

"It looks like you're tired. You should go to bed."

"I was planning on doing homework but, I think that's a good idea, do you want me to make you a little bed or something?"

"I'll just sleep on one of your pillows, don't worry about me."

"Okay, goodnight Plagg."

"Goodnight Mari."

I turn to go upstairs, back to the main floor, after grabbing everything while Plagg flies behind me. I fall onto the couch and snuggle in my blankets, as I felt Plagg land on my pillow I give him a small smile and pull him a little closer, but not close enough that he can't get comfy. I close my eyes letting sleep take me over.

Meanwhile with Adrien

"I'm home!" I called out to the bustling house. I hear my mom shout back a 'welcome home' before she comes out to greet me with a hug and smile. I hug her back and head up to my room. I have to finish my homework and distract myself from Mari. She never came second period and I got worried, she wouldn't answer any of my texts or calls and I'm afraid of just what exactly she did when she got home. When she first started at our school she was nervous and didn't talk much. She made friends with Alya, Nino and me. But she didn't open up much. The only reason she opened up to me was because I helped her in her moment of weakness. I held her and let her cry on my shoulder, a little while after that I had realized that I fell in love with her. Now whenever she needs to cry and be held she comes to me, but today she didn't. She just sat there and stared into space. I'm worried, but all that worry vanished when I walked into my room. Right away I could tell something was off. I set down my bag and looked around, there on the table in front of my TV was a little black box, I opened it and out came a blinding pink light and a flying genie of some sort. I was perplexed.

"What are you?" I ask myself.

"My name is Tikki and I am a kwami. It's like a god." And this little flying creature continued to explain what was happening. I was silent the whole time. "And that's everything." Tikki said in her sweet voice.

"Okay, let me get this straight, I am a superhero. And these earrings are what gives me my superhero powers?"

"Yup, you have to keep them on at all times or else I won't be here. As long as you wear the earrings I will be with you. Also do you have any cookies?"

"Yeah, here I'll go grab some, you can go ahead and make yourself comfortable." I say as I grab the cookies from the kitchen, everything is turning into something new. When I get back to my room I decide to text Mari once again.

Sent 3:37 pm Hey Mare, I hope you're okay, please tell me if you need anything. You know I'm always here for you. I got your homework from the rest of the school day since you never came back. I think I already said this. Anyways… text back when you can. :)

Satisfied with my message I decided to finish my homework from today.

Back With Mari

It's been a few hours and I can't seem to fall asleep. My phone buzzes again, this time from both Alya and Adrien. I read Alya's first.

Sent 3:38pm Alya: Are you sick or something, you never returned to class…

Sent 3:38pm Mari: I'm fine now, I just wasn't feeling well. Sorry I left so suddenly.

Sent 3:39 pm Alya: It's okay girl, I was just worried.

Sent 3:39 pm Mari: I'm fine, but thanks for being there for me.

I then text Adrien back.

Sent 3:37 pm Adrien: Hey Mare, I hope you're okay, please tell me if you need anything. You know I'm always here for you. I got your homework from the rest of the school day since you never came back. I think I already said this. Anyways… text back when you can. :)

Sent 3:40 pm Mari: No I'm not okay, do you think you could come over for a bit and hang out. I just need some support right now. Thanks for getting my homework…

Sent 3:40 pm Adrien: I'm on my way right now. I'll be there in a few minutes.

Sent 3:40 pm Mari: Okay, thank you.

I sit there and stare off into space, then I decide to wake Plagg up since he can't be known about to other people, other than me. I ask him to go to my room so I can have some time alone with Adrien. He takes some cheese with him and heads upstairs to my room. I then think of my cuts and how disappointed Adrien is going to be. I sigh and head back to the couch. A few minutes later the door swings open and Adrien comes in with a worried look. His eyes search the house until they fall on me. He closes the door and slowly walks over . He sits next to me and pulls me into his arms. I hiss when he touches my wrists but other than that I don't make a sound. After a few minutes we shift into a more comfortable position, he lies down and I lie in his arms, feeling safe and secure. I finally fell asleep in his arms. Feeling calm, the thoughts inside my head finally calm down and let me rest, feeling my sense of security and safeness. I know the thoughts inside my head will start again when he leaves but this moment of peace is just what I needed.

Place your hand over your heart, feel that? That's called PURPOSE. Don't forget it. -Anonymous