Eren is trying his best not to look in front of him, or more specifically at the very intimidating man cornering him in a part of the room they are both in. Alone. After working hours. He has tried his best to avoid him ever since the man got transferred to his office. He had hoped to never see him in this life, had been thankful for the last 25 years he didn't, because he had no idea how to react if they met.

He still has no idea how to act in his presence to be honest. When he was introduced as their new head of department, Eren tried to make himself small, hoping the man didn't have any memories of the past, but his prayers weren't answered. The moment Levi Ackerman laid his eyes on him, Eren knew he remembered. And how could he avoid his new boss on a daily basis? It wasn't in any way easy, but he somehow managed.

Until today.

As soon as he finished his work, which had made him stay a bit later than usual, Levi took his arm and led him to his office, locking the door behind them and trapping Eren in a corner, his hand on the wall beside the brunet, preventing him from leaving.

Levi looks murderous and utterly pissed, and Eren can easily understand why. It has been three months since he came here and they still haven't had a serious conversation. Eren knows Levi wants to talk, but he himself doesn't want to. He has been dreading this moment; however now he has no choice but to face his fears. Face the man he used to love. Face the man he still loves but has sworn not to get involved with ever again.

"You're not going anywhere until you tell me why the fuck you're avoiding me," Levi growls at him, a dangerous glint in his eyes.

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Mr. Ackerman," Eren feigns ignorance, still hoping to get out of this situation and go back to ignore the short man standing in front of him.

"Don't play that little game with me, Eren. I know you remember," Levi spits out, his anger obviously rising at Eren's reply. "And I'm having a hard time understanding why you're acting like that if you do. I'm tired of your bullshit, so just tell me the truth."

Eren can't look at Levi in the eye, not when all he can see when he does are flashes of a distant memory he wants to forget. That specific part of their lives had haunted him for years until it finally disappeared and got buried under other memories; however, the moment Levi came back into his life, the memory came back with him and was now haunting him once more. He thought avoiding the source of it would at some point make it go away, but it was difficult when he could see Levi's face every day at work, even if they weren't really interacting.

"Yes, I do remember, but I hardly see how it changes anything," Eren sighs before staring at the older man as coldly as he can. "Now if you'll excuse me, I would like to go home."

Eren takes advantage of Levi's frozen and surprised state to remove his arm and make his way towards the door. He hardly takes two steps before he can feel two strong hands grabbing his collar, and the next second his back collides harshly with the wall, knocking the air out of his lungs for a few seconds and forcing him to close his eyes in pain. When he opens them again, Levi is fulminating with rage, his teeth tightly shut and his lips trembling.

The brunet tries his hardest not to show the fear he's actually feeling in that moment, but also the pain that shoots through his heart at the state he rendered Levi in. This is for the best, he tries to convince himself while making an unimpressed face in front of the man's fury. This is what's best for the both of us.

"What are you getting all mad about, huh?" Eren grins mockingly, letting a short snort which infuriates the man further. He just has to stay in character and then they'll both be free.

"Stop acting like an asshole, it doesn't suit you. And try to be honest for once in your goddamn life!" Levi spits out, his face coming dangerously closer to Eren's. He can almost feel his hot breath on his skin and he tries not to let it get to his head.

"I'm not the one pinning someone against a wall," Eren answers calmly, tone even. "You want me to be honest with you?"

"That would be fucking nice," Levi replies, his teeth still gritted together.

"I didn't want to see you again. But I can't afford to find another job, so I guess I don't have a choice but to see your face on a daily basis."

Levi's grip slowly lessens on his collar until his hands come to rest at his sides, his eyes wide open, looking all over Eren's face for some clues, probably hints of his dishonesty. However, as he seems to find none, he suddenly looks crestfallen and resigned, his gaze directed somewhere at the brunet's chest.

"Is that so…" he softly murmurs.

Eren musters all his resolve not to hug him here and there, the disappointment in his tone still echoing in his head. It's for the best, it's for the best, he chants in his mind, making another attempt at walking to the door. He is once again interrupted, but this time in a more gentle and surprising way.

Levi is encircling his waist with his arms, his head hidden in his back, and Eren can feel his forehead through his spine. The sudden embrace is enough to make him stop in his tracks and he grips the doorknob tightly with his right hand, his teeth hardly sunken into his bottom lip, almost to the point of making himself bleed, in order to force his body not to move instinctually. Every fiber of his body is telling him to hug the shorter man back but his mind is screaming at him to ignore it. It's a battle he can't even predict the outcome of.

"I wanted to see you," Levi's voice is muffled by his shirt where his face is still hidden, but Eren listens to him carefully, his heart beating incredibly fast. "Ever since I can remember you, I've been looking for you. When I finally found you, I was so… happy. I couldn't wait to see your face again. Be able to touch you, hold you, kiss you, just like before."

There is a small pause and Eren is holding back his breath, willing himself not to tear up. He can't cry, not now. He's so close to his goal. He can't back away now. He took a decision years ago in case that day would come. He won't change his mind now. He can't.

"I wanted to see you…" Levi says again, hugging Eren more strongly, bringing him closer to his body, as if he can't bring himself to let go. "But I never imagined you wouldn't want to see me." He can feel Levi nuzzling his nose into his back before eventually resting his cheek against it. "After everything we went through back then, after everything we shared, I guess I just thought you'd feel the same. After all, you promised me we'd always be together, no matter what."

Eren's head shots up at his last sentence, his blood starting to boil inside his veins. Flashes of a day he has tried over and over again to suppress from his memories flood his mind, and he's the one gritting his teeth now, breaking Levi's embrace and turning around to push him away from him.

"Don't you dare talk about that day!" He can feel both anger and despair overwhelming him and suddenly his chest is too tight and his stomach heavy.

"Eren…?" Levi looks back at him with utter confusion, probably not expecting him to react violently after his cool demeanor of earlier.

"You can't bring this up like that! Not after you-"

Eren chokes on the words and brings a hand to his mouth, feeling really sick and nauseous. His legs are suddenly too weak to support his body and he falls to the floor, eyes closed, vaguely registering Levi's voice calling his name once again.

"Eren! Are you okay?"

Eren doesn't answer him, can't anyway. He's still trying to prevent himself from throwing up, desperately trying to ease his stomach by chasing the images flashing before his eyes. The sight of his lover hurt and wounded, his face as pale as the snow in winter and his uniform tainted in crimson red. He can still hear his voice, low from exhaustion and hoarse after coughing up blood, as they exchanged parting and loving words, promises they'd never be able to keep in this lifetime. He can feel the cold hand he put on his cheek, telling him not to cry, as warm blood kept flowing around them and on Eren's hands. He can see the life slowly disappearing from his blue eyes, turning them grey, as he gave his last breath inside his arms.

The memories are too fresh and vivid in his mind in that moment, but the warmth of Levi's hand on his cheek bring him back to the present, tears forming in his eyes as he looks back at the very much alive man kneeling in front of him. Once he realizes where he is and what is happening, Eren smacks the hand away and moves back until his back is against the door, trying to get away.

Levi's hand hangs in the air until he balls it into a fist, his face looking both worried and distraught at Eren's reaction. He sits on the floor in front of him but not without leaving a small distance between them, giving Eren the space he needs. It doesn't really help the brunet regulate his breathing however, his mind still plagued by past memories and his body fighting against an incoming panic attack.

"I- I can't do this, Levi," he articulates painfully.

"What do you mean?" Levi frowns, not really following his train of thoughts.

"I just- I can't. It's too much." He takes his head in his hands, shaking it dismissively, tears running down his cheeks. "I can't go through that again."

"Through what? Eren, I have no idea what is going on."

"You! Dying in my arms! I can't, Levi!" Eren keeps on shaking his head, his hands on his ears, trying to block the outside world. "I can still remember it clearly, watching you go as I sat there, powerless! And I don't want to go through that again! I can't, Levi, it's… I just can't! It's too much!"

"Eren, hey! Look at me!" Levi takes the brunet's hands away from his ears, trying to gain his attention, his eyes shining with a new kind of determination. "You won't have to. There are no Titans and we're not soldiers anymore. Nothing is going to happen to us. We're safe. I'm not going to die, I promise."

"How can you promise that? You could die anytime! There're so many things that could kill you! Outside on the street, on the road, even at your house! No one is safe anywhere!" Eren screams at him, his tears turning into ones of frustration.

Levi looks at him silently, letting him rant until he's done, looking as serious as ever. He releases Eren's hands in order to cup his face, forcing the younger man to look at him in the eye.

"Yes, it's true. I could die anytime. I'm only human after all, and so are you. You don't have your Titan powers anymore. If you're hurt, you won't heal like you used to. And so what? We're supposed to live in the fear of dying one day? I won't lie, it'll happen. To you, to me, to everybody. But it doesn't mean we can't live in the meantime. On the contrary, that's exactly why we should live our lives to the fullest, because we don't know what we'll happen.

"You think I want to go through that too? See you dying as I'm left all alone? Nobody does, Eren. But that doesn't mean we should let that fear control us. Is that what you want? Be controlled by your fears? Let them rule your life?"

Eren looks back at Levi with wide eyes, surprised at the scolding he just got. Levi is right, of course he is, but Eren can still remember the pain he felt that day. He can still feel it tear his insides and squeeze his heart, as well as the guilt at the knowledge it happened because of him. He was the one responsible for Levi's death. If he had just listened… He can't be the reason why Levi isn't going to die of old age. He doesn't want him to be hurt because of him again. He just wants him to be safe and happy.

"B-but… It was m-my fault. You d-died because of m-me," Eren sniffs loudly as Levi gently removes the tears from his face. "I-I don't want to hurt y-you again."

"Eren, apart from breaking my heart, you won't do me any harm in this world," the raven murmurs as he softly presses their foreheads together, still looking deep into his eyes.

"I-I…"

Eren has no idea what to do now. He has been so dead set on having nothing to do with the man if they ever came to cross path, but now that they are facing each other like this, all he wants to do is to burry himself into his embrace and feel his lips on his.

Levi is right about one thing: he is letting his fears control him, and that isn't a way he wants to live his life. He wants to be brave, not let anything nor anyone get in his way, follow his dreams and his heart as he once did. He needs to get a better grip on himself. He needs to move on.

"Someone once told me a good way to erase bad memories. Do you want to know how?" Eren's interest is picked and his eyes start shining with hope as he nods furiously at Levi. "The best way to do that is by overwriting them with good ones."

Eren's eyebrows furrow in front of the simplicity of the reply, a little confused.

"That's it?"

"That's it."

Levi is still cupping his face with one hand as the other one gently brushes his hair, looking at him with so much fondness that Eren's heart becomes heavy, for once not because of pain or loss, but because of love and tenderness. He can feel the feelings he had so strongly tried to push away in a corner of his mind slowly getting out of their little box and filling every cell of his body with warmth.

"So, Eren… What do you say about making new memories together?"

Levi is smiling at him, with his lips slightly turned upwards and his eyes cracked just a little with hopefulness, and it's all it takes for Eren to smile back at him, letting hope settle inside his chest once more, leaving behind all his bad emotions such as fear, pain and guilt. He has been fighting endlessly and aimlessly for a while now, but he doesn't have to anymore. He can use all of his energy to fight for a brighter future instead of fighting to protect himself from an agonizing past.

"I'd like that."