I figured I would give it a shot and continue this fanfic. Yay! I know that at least one person wanted me to continue. Perhaps they liked the original character that I made. I dunno.
Well, the demon is here to stay. Not all girls are as sweet as Marzipan...though to be fair, I don't think Marzipan is Strong Bad's type. He's a bad boy...though he's not as strong as he thinks he is.
i wonder what Strong Sad's type of girl would be. I would imagine that he would want a girl that could cheer him up. Who does Strong Sad think he is, anyway? Eeyore?
Chapter 3: Dick Dastardly Would Be Proud
Strong Bad and Inferna arrived on the racetrack.
Today was sunny outside, so it looked like a good time to be racing.
"Anyone want drinking water?" asked Babs. He figured he could sell some to the racers.
Sure enough, Homestar Runner happened to be there.
"Oh, hey Strong Bad!" greeted Homestar.
And yes, he had arrived before Strong Bad did.
That wasn't exactly a sign that he was going to win.
"is it just me, or do Homestar Runner's eyes look like sixes?" asked Couch Z.
"Maybe he's twelve years old?" inquired King of Town.
Poopsmith shrugged.
"So, what's the plan?" asked Inferna. Did Strong Bad want Inferna to take Homestar to Hell so that he could win by forfeit? To be honest, she wasn't sure if the demons would accept him. Homestar Runner seemed incorruptible.
"Nah, I'm sure that the demons would boot him out on account on how annoying he is. We're going to put itching powder in Homestar's shirt!" exclaimed Strong Bad, pulling out a can of said powder.
"Shouldn't we be putting the powder in his pants?" inquired the girl. It seemed like a better place to put it.
"He doesn't wear pants!" shouted the boxer.
"He doesn't? He just walks around in his underwear?" asked Inferna. To be honest, she wasn't sure if that legal.
"It's kind of complicated." noted Strong Bad.
Shrugging, Inferna did just that.
Considering Strong Bad never wore a shirt, perhaps it wasn't that surprising.
Since she was a demon, she didn't actually need clothes.
Fortunately, Homestar Runner did not notice her. He was too busy looking at the clouds.
"That one looks like Marzipan!" shouted Homestar Runner.
However, he began to feel an itching sensation.
"Why do I feel so itchy?" questioned Homestar Runner. Were there bugs crawling inside his shirt? The idea sounded kind of scary.
Strong Bad smirked.
So far, everything was going according to plan.
Now, it was time for the race to begin.
It seemed that there were a lot of people who were rooting for Homestar.
One of them, of course, was Marzipan.
If she had hands, she would probably be carrying pom poms.
In contrast, the only person who was rooting for Strong Bad was the Cheat.
He must have felt lonely on the stand.
"Ready, start!" shouted the king.
Strong Bad immediately ran...
...but at that very moment, Homestar Runner started to roll around, trying to relieve himself of his itching.
He tripped over him and fell.
"Ow!" shouted Strong Bad.
Homestar Runner helped himself to his feet and kept running. And yes, he was able to pick himself back up even though he did not have arms.
"C'mon!" exclaimed Inferna.
Strong Bad got back up.
Inferna then placed a banana peel on the race track.
However, Marzipan noticed.
"Who littered? They need to respect the environment a little bit more." noted the girl.
She placed it in a trash can.
However, it tipped over.
"Whoops!" exclaimed Marzipan.
Strong Bad ended up tripping over the garbage, much like Charlie Brown did.
As soon as he realized what he was covered with, he felt disgusted.
"Aargh! I'm going to need a shower after this!" exclaimed Strong Bad.
"Will you take off your mask?" asked Inferna.
"No! I never take off my mask!" shouted the boxer.
Inferna scratched her head.
She decided to pour soda on the ground next.
Hopefully, Homestar Runner would slip.
But there was a problem with that plan.
"Ooh! Cherry soda! My favorite!" exclaimed Homestar Runner.
He pulled out a straw and sucked up the liquid.
However, this made him feel the urge to use the restroom.
"Oh man! I bettah finish this race quickly!" exclaimed Homestar Runner. He didn't want to wet his pants.
Oh wait, he didn't wear pants.
He began to run faster than before.
"Oh c'mon!" shouted Strong Bad. Were his cheating attempts all doomed to fail? It seemed all his efforts to not win the race fairly were going to waste.
Finally, Inferna decided to do something that only Homestar Runner would fall for.
She pulled out a paint can and crossed out FINISH on the Finish Line sign.
She then replaced it with "GO BACK TO THE STARTING LINE!"
Homestar Runner noticed.
"Huh. I guess I should go back to the stawting line." noted Homestar.
However, he then noticed that Strong Mad was cooking hot dogs.
The King Of Town was munching on one of them. He had the biggest appetite in all of Free Country, USA.
In contrast, the Poopsmith didn't seem to eat much. Homestar wasn't sure why.
"Wight after I eat some of those delicious hot dogs!" exclaimed the runner.
He went to the hot dog kart, crossing the finish line in the process.
Inferna groaned.
It looked as if Homestar Runner had managed to win the race...despite all the cheating. Maybe if he had spent less time coming up with ways to cheat at the race (such as summoning a demon, for instance) and more time trying to get faster, he might have actually won.
"Well, now to use the restroom!" shouted Homestar Runner.
Homestar went to relieve himself.
Unfortunately, as he was faster, he got there before Strong Bad.
"Noooooo!" shouted Strong Bad, pressing his hands against his face.
It looked as if Homestar Runner had beaten him...again!
Curiously, Marzipan also noticed that the ladies' room was occupied.
She was very surprised by that.
"Why is the ladies' room occupied? I thought I was the only girl here!" exclaimed Marzipan.
"Times have changed." explained Inferna from the other side.
"Oh, right..." nodded Marzipan.
Strangely enough, though Inferna was the same gender that she was, she seemed to have more in common with Strong Bad than she did with her. It was kind of ironic. Perhaps boys and girls weren't entirely different species.
Perhaps not all girls were as innocent as she was.
After Strong Bad finally go to use the restroom (and in the process endured more pain than the Poopsmith himself), Inferna decided to talk to him.
"We haven't discussed our payment..." said Inferna.
"You mean my soul?" asked Strong Bad. Personally, he considered his soul to be priceless...and for Homestar Runner's soul to be worthless.
"No, I just want one of your comics." explained the demon.
Strong Bad wondered if he had gotten the better end of the bargain. Though he did wonder why Inferna simply wanted one of his comics when he could have his irresistible soul instead.
Things didn't go according to plan, but still.
Strong Bad handed her one of those said comic.
She examined it curiously.
"Stinkoman? Reminds me of a video game." noted Inferna. And why exactly did Stinkoman stink so much? Based on the comics Strong Bad wrote, Stinkoman was actually rather awesome.
To be honest, she wanted to stay in Free Country, USA.
Her home plane...wasn't exactly a free country.
"So, are you leaving?" asked Strong Bad. Her visit had been fun while it lasted.
However, Inferna had other plans.
"Nah, I think I'll stay here." said Inferna, shaking her head. She would probably have to deal with everything that annoyed Strong Bad (such as Strong Bad's excessive whining), but she could live with that.
To be honest, though Free Country, USA seemed more like a place where Marzipan would want to live on, she actually kind of liked how peaceful it was. It didn't seem like there was anything wrong with it at all.
Though the King Of Town was gluttonous, he wasn't stealing anyone's food...or charging outrageous taxes. In fact, he didn't seem to do anything.
She was fascinated by Trogdor though. Apparently, he was a fiery dragon that destroyed everything in sight. And for some strange reason he had fists.
And yet, she wondered how Trogdor was able to fly with such small wings. They didn't look like they could support his weight.
Anyways, she needed to focus on finding a house.
Fortunately, there was a place she could live in.
There was a haunted house that nobody in Free Country seemed to want to visit. Perhaps it had originally belonged to the King Of Town before he decided to move into a castle. Why was he living in a castle, anyway? This was the modern world.
Strong Bad claimed that he was afraid of nothing, but he never stepped foot anywhere near the place.
However, she thought the house was lovely.
Sure enough, there were ghosts in the house.
"You don't mind if I crash here, do you?" asked Inferna.
"I died in a car crash..." noted one of the ghosts. He really needed to watch where he was going.
"Sorry to hear that. Remember, safety first!" exclaimed the demon.
Fortunately, there was a bed she could sleep in.
She wondered if there were are other tasks Strong Bad wanted her to do.
Inferna wouldn't mind reading more of Strong Bad's comics. Marzipan didn't seem to like them, but she sure did.
She could also help Homestar Runner, but he was too innocent and sweet for his tastes. He was still preferable to the fiends that lived in her home plane, but even so, he was kind of irritating.
Perhaps that was why Strong Bad didn't seem to like him much.
She decided to go to sleep.
Meanwhile...
The Cheat wondered if he should attempt to perform a demonic ritual of his own. It seemed to work out for Strong Bad, so perhaps it would work out for him. The only question was...what should he trade for his soul?
Then again, maybe it wasn't such a good idea. If the demon decided to go on a destructive rampage across Free Country, USA, chances are people would start pointing fingers at him.
He might not want to make a deal with the demon that Strong Bad had summoned, even if she was kind of...attractive.
Strangely enough, the demon didn't seem interested in Strong Bad's soul.
Would she be interested in his though?
Anyways, perhaps he should abstain from the activity. He didn't want to be tortured in the Underworld.
But there was so much he could ask for...
...he decided to perform just one summoning ritual.
However, someone entered the room.
Strong Mad approached him.
"What you up to?" asked the eldest of the Strong brothers.
He suspected that Cheat was planning something, but he wasn't quite sure what.
"Certainly not anything that would offend Christians!" exclaimed Cheat.
"Ok." said Strong Bad's older brother.
He left Cheat alone.
However, when Cheat tried summoning, he only summoned Strong Sad...who was only about ten feet away. He appeared in a burst of smoke.
"You summoned me? I feel happy!" exclaimed Strong Sad.
Something then occurred to him.
"Oh wait. You probably didn't do it on purpose, did you?" questioned the youngest of the Strong brothers. Strong Bad found his pessimism to be annoying, so perhaps Cheat did too.
Cheat shook his head.
Strong Sad sighed.
"Well, I'll be in my room." said Strong Sad.
The Cheat decided not to perform any more rituals...for now.
Meanwhile...
"Congratulations on winning the race, Homestar." spoke Marzipan.
Of course, she had been rooting for him the entire time.
"I feel so happy!" shouted Homestar Runner. It helped that people cheered for him when he won the race.
On the other hand, Strong Bad threw a temper tantrum.
"I'm sure you do." nodded the only girl in Free Country, USA...until recently.
Homestar Runner had another trophy on his wall.
For some strange reason, he could never win at a wrestling competition.
He also couldn't win at a typing competition.
Homestar wasn't quite sure why.
But he could definitely win at a racing competition. The trophies on his wall were a testament to that.
However, Homestar couldn't quite count how many time he had.
According to Marzipan's calculations, he had won a hundred of them.
And yet, he wasn't nearly as arrogant as Strong Bad was, even though Strong Bad never seemed to win a trophy for...anything.
He had answered lots of e-mails though, more than anyone else in Free Country, USA.
So at least that was something.
Homestar received a phone call from Pom Pom.
"Hello?" asked Homestar.
Fortunately, for the sake of convenience, Pom Pom's speech was translated. Otherwise, we we would have no way of understanding him.
"Congratulations on winning the race. You've already won many races, but I figured I would congratulate you anyway." noted Pom Pom. He had been in the audience watching the race unfold.
To be honest, he suspected Strong Bad would cheat. He had always been jealous of Homestar's talent.
Perhaps he should find his own talent instead of using devious methods to make Homestar Runner lose.
Well, he would keep an eye on Strong Bad in the next race. If he tried cheating again, he would blow the whistle.
"Thank you! How are your girlfwiends doing?" asked Homestar. He had lost count on just how many girlfriends Pom Pom had.
Considering that Free Country, USA seemed to be lacking in women, it was rather surprising that Pom Pom had managed to gather so many of them.
"They're doing fine. Although they do seem a bit spooked about something that happened last night..." noted Pom Pom.
"You think it has anything to do with the demon girl Strong Bad is with? I don't think she was thewe yesterday." remarked Homestar Runner.
"A demon girl? What was Strong Bad thinking?" asked the resident of Free Country, USA that looked like a balloon on a parade float.
"Pwobably about hot giwls." noted Homestar Runner. He wasn't as smart as Strong Bad was, but he knew that Strong Bad imagined himself as a ladies' man.
However, the real ladies' man in Free Country, USA was Pom Pom. Perhaps he was lucky that he got to Marzipan before Pom Pom did.
"Yeah..." nodded Pom Pom. Still, he didn't imagine that Strong Bad would ever perform a demonic ritual.
It seemed foolish.
But at least Free Country, USA seemed the same...although for some strange reason, Marzipan seemed to have lost her status as the only girl in Free Country, USA.
Apparently, she was still the only girly girl though.
"I'll talk to you later." said Pom Pom.
Pom Pom hanged up.
Meanwhile...
Strong Bad decided to answer his e-mail.
"Let's see now..." said Strong Bad.
Personally he wondered what would happen if Strong Sad decided to host an e-mail account.
Perhaps it would be best if he didn't. What if he received hate mail?
Earlier he had received mail from Strong Sad, asking him what had happened to his teddy bear Mr. Fluffy.
The Cheat had used it as a chew toy.
Dear Strong Bad,
Can you teach me how to summon a demon? It sounds cool.
From Jake
"How did I know this was coming?" questioned Strong Bad.
He just hoped that his mother wasn't a nun.
Well, he might as well explain.
Meanwhile...
Unbeknownst to Homestar Runner, someone was embittered by seeing him on TV.
That person happened to be Homeschool Winner.
If he had fists, he would be clenching them.
While everyone in Free Country, USA knew of Homestar Runner (and he was possibly even more popular than the proclaimed leader of Free Country, USA, the King Of Town), it seemed that almost nobody had heard of him.
It made him so angry.
It seemed like Homestar Runner was gaining everyone's adoration time and time again.
"Why does he get to be in the spotlight? If anyone should be in the spotlight, it should be me!" exclaimed Homeschool Winner.
If only there was a way to get rid of Homestar Runner. That way he could become the celebrity of Free Country, USA.
Suddenly, he got an idea.
"Heh heh heh heh...enjoy your popularity while it lasts, Homestar Runner. Pretty soon, you're going to be a pariah!" shouted Homeschool.
And yes, he had an evil-sounding voice.
He let out a wicked laugh.
Were you surprised that Strong Bad failed? Probably not, right?
Can you guess why Homestar can't win at a wrestling competition? I hope I don't have to explain the joke.
Well, it looks like Strong Bad's deal with the devil didn't go as planned. Part of the reason I wrote this fanfic was because I figured...what if Marzipan wasn't the only girl?
I didn't want her to be the same as Marzipan though. I decided to do something a bit more creative, a female that WASN'T stereotypical.
In the next chapter, Homestar Runner is going to be framed for a crime that he did not commit. Strong Bad of all people is going to try to prove his innocence.
And yes, Inferna is going to help him. Why not?