AN: honestly not quite sure where this one came from...but it kept bugging my brain and distracting me from work.
Fealty: ErKang
Fu Er Kang was no stranger to duty. He was fully aware of the weight of expectations and legacy on his shoulders. He served, as generations of his family had always done, at the will and for the pleasure of the Emperor. All that he knew, all that his family possessed, was from the generosity of Heaven's Son. He knew well enough that a single glance or wave of the hand could do away with it all. He knew he owed his Emperor fealty. In his childish mind, HuangShang was more than a man; he was China.
As he continued to serve at the Emperor's side, Er Kang came to respect his lord. The Emperor's will remained a powerful force that made him more god than man. But Er Kang saw the keen intelligence that enabled the Emperor to sit securely on his throne. Qianlong's uncertain temper served to keep his vassals alert while his praise kept them loyal. The hands that could destroy at a whim could also build. Er Kang's fealty was gladly given. He was proud to serve. He would protect Huang Shang, with his life if need be; his admiration demanded nothing less.
Despite the closeness between Er Tai and Wu-Ah-Ge, Er Kang never thought of the Emperor as simply father. Despite his aunt's position as a Royal Concubine, he could not think of the Emperor as husband. HuangShang was too much more for such earthly titles. And then the hunt happened. The expression on the Emperor's face was all too human as he heard the words the girl uttered. Shock, anguish, shame, guilt, regret. Emotions hidden away as quickly as they appeared, but Er Kang, used to observing those around him, saw. He saw and recalled in a flash the solemn atmosphere in the Palace when Empress Xiaoxianchun had passed. He paced, restless not only because of the aborted hunt. When his father returned from an audience with the Emperor solemn of face and furrowed of brow, Er Kang wondered. He did not mean to, but he overheard a whispered conference between his parents that only added to his suspicions.
Learning Xia Zi Wei's story only added to the cracks in the pedestal on which the Emperor stood. Every fiber of her being wished to be reunited with her father, he could sense it. She cared nothing for the privilege of being a GeGe, only that possessing such a title meant recognition from her father. He wondered if she truly understood that the Emperor was more than a mere man. And yet, her very existence spoke to the fact that the Emperor was all too human. Ying xiong nan guo mei ren gua. Even a hero such as the Emperor was not immune to the beauty of a woman. He was a lover of beauty. He was an ardent patron of art, poetry, literature...he was known to travel with paintings so that he may compare the artist's rendition with the original. Besides, did not a Palace full of Niang-Niang's speak to the truth? Zi Wei cannot be the only royal bastard outside the red walls of the palace.
But with Xiao Yan Zi and later, Zi Wei herself, Qianlong was merely father. A Royal father, yes, but still a father. Even when admonishing Xiao Yan Zi for her mischief, he did so under the mantle of paternal care. He chided her, worried about her, laughed with her, and dotted upon her with unprecedented gentleness. Xiao Yan Zi, willful, independent Xiao Yan Zi, was so unlike the docile, careful little adults that passed for children in the Palace. Er Kang wondered if the Emperor was discovering fatherhood, real, unfiltered, unmanageable fatherhood, for the first time. Xiao Yan Zi cannot know the extraordinarily humanizing effect she had on the closest thing to a god on this earth. Even had she known, would she understand its meaning? Er Kang suspected not. Xiao Yan Zi treated everyone with an irreverence that was at once a part of her charm and a source of danger. Her naiveté suggested an innocence that a person with her experiences could not hope to possess. And yet, her righteousness made her world black and white. He knew the world to be shades of grey. The Emperor, however, was golden. Or so he had thought.
At times, Er Kang felt proud. Proud that he was a better man than HuangShang. Though their world would never condemn him, Er Kang would never live with the guilt of having betrayed the woman he loved. He would never stand over the grave of his beloved, filled with guilt at the pleasure of a summer's dream or look upon the face of his child and regret a broken promise. He never dared voice such thoughts; to utter them would be treason and, worse yet, would break Zi Wei's heart. Had she known, she would have taken solace in the fact that her unwavering loyalty to the man she considered father, despite the hurt he wrought in rejecting the position, helped Er Kang retain his fealty even in the face of Xiao-Jian's steel-cold anger.
The Emperor's presence was strategic. In his mind, Er Kang knew, despite agreeing to follow Zi Wei to build their own haven, that the Emperor would eventually succeed. Zi Wei, sweet, forgiving Zi Wei, could not refuse her father. The wound had long ago healed and her stubbornness was no match for the Emperor's will. But perhaps he was mistaken. Qianlong can be devious and cunning, but his grief and his sorrow was genuine. When mighty men make mistakes, the consequences are never small. But he was only a man; one somewhat prone to obsession, possessiveness, and a selfishness that could be startling reminiscent of Xiao Yan Zi. He wanted his children back, but his words were a request, not a command. His flaws as a man did not lessen his greatness as a leader. Er Kang would return to BeiJing, to his parents, to his position, to the Fu family legacy. He would serve, would protect, would lay down his life if need be. He duty was to his Emperor but his fealty was to a man who has learned to be a father.