A/N: Hello, all. It's me again. I'm back with another SPN fic (part of my multi-fic SPN series I've been working on that started with the Night fics). I know. You missed me. Kidding. :) Either way, this will be a five chapter fic when all is said and done. I have it all written out. It was supposed to be another one-shot admittedly, but it turned into this beast. On the behalf of advice from my amazing bestie DaughterOfAres, I will be posting one chapter each week. Blame her if you want updates faster. I wanted to post it all, but she stated I'd overwhelm my lovely readers. Without further ado, enjoy.

Painful Reminders

Lulling his head to the side feebly, the blue-eyed, messy dark-haired Seraph, who had yanked his Righteous Man out of the deepest fiery levels of Hell and fought off hordes upon hordes of demons in the process eleven years prior, groaned quietly. His throat felt dry and scratchy and positively raw. His eyes fluttered closed for a moment before another groan passed his chapped lips.

"Shh. I got you, kiddo," someone murmured off to his right.

He knew he should have recognized that voice, but he couldn't. Everything hurt. Like his Grace was punishing him for some unknown reason. It was worse than all his experiences with Naomi, the Leviathans, Lucifer even.

His vessel typically ran warmer than the normal 98.6 degrees humans usually were. It was an Angelic vessel thing having to do with Grace. Something he never questioned, never would have thought to, had it not been for his brief stint as a human. Though the more he lost his Grace, the more he found himself noticing the oddities of his vessel.

Dean hated that he still referred to it as his vessel. They had numerous arguments about it. But how was Castiel supposed to consider it his own body when he knew it wasn't, that it was actually a replica of Jimmy Novak's body in fact? He couldn't just dismiss Jimmy's sacrifice. Not when the man had given up so much for Castiel. It was a debt he could never repay.

"Hey," murmured the voice again, closer this time. "It's okay. I got you."

Was this—he knew that voice! He had heard it hundreds of times before, but the pain was too much, too intense, for him to focus on anything other than that. He was burning.

Djinn? Had he run into one accidentally and forgotten? He supposed it was possible. Maybe.

His whole body tensed again as his nerves suddenly roared in brutal pain. The coughing came next, exacerbated by his discomfort. He curled in on himself in hopes to escape it all, wishing whatever this was would just leave in peace.

"I know, kiddo. I know it hurts." The voice, kind and worried, paused for a brief moment. "We're going to figure this out, though. You and me. Got it?"

Fingertips faintly brushed against the back of his sweaty neck in what he supposed was a tender manner. He whimpered, though. The touch, light as it was, made the pain ten times worse.

"Please . . ." he cried, not caring who heard his pleas of anguish. He just wanted it to stop.

"I know. I know, little brother," shakily replied the voice near his ear. "I'll make it quick."

"Please," sobbed the sweet broken angel who begged for his release from his torture.

A hand then replaced the fingertips. His pain soared upwards instantly at the touch. The guttural scream tore from deep within to the Heavens. His Grace seized inside. Pain so blinding, so intense, surrounded every single part of his vessel.

And then quick as it came, the pain diminished. An electric warmth filled him, shoving his pain to the farthest reaches of his insides before it vanished altogether.

He sagged against the mattress once the pain was gone. His chest heaved with breaths he never had needed before. The raven locks, messy as ever, stuck against his forehead, but with each wheezing breath, it slowly became easier to think, to see, to hear.

"Cas?"

He closed his eyes at hearing his name and sighed disappointingly. That answered one question.

"You know what?" The voice forced a mirthless laugh. "That's fine. That's totally fine, brat. I mean, it's not like I haven't been sitting here with you all day, worrying or anything, giving you some of my Grace as well so you don't end up dying or some such crap. No. No. It's fine. I mean, I get it. I don't have green eyes and freckles and Daddy issues galore. I'm just your big brother. Right?"

One blue eye peeked open, glancing at his sandy-haired older brother who knelt by his bedside.

"Thank you," Cas rasped.

"Oh, he speaks!" mocked the archangel, clearly irritated for some reason. His brother then grabbed a glass from the bedside table and held it out patiently, the straw brushing against Cas's lips. "Pretend it's your boyfriend's—"

"Gabriel!" hissed a woman from behind the archangel, cutting him off.

Cas took a sip from the straw, though, looking on curiously. He was surprised to discover that the glass held some sort of flavored water that his brother was offering him. It tasted . . . pleasant.

Amber eyes rolled dramatically before the sandy-haired man sighed, pulling away the glass when Cas swallowed. "Yes, Mother."

Glassy blue eyes narrowed on his brother. Mother? They didn't have a mother. Though, he supposed, they did have an asshole for a father. He winced in sympathy when he heard the resulting smack nearby. He couldn't see whom the woman was as Gabriel and his stupid red plaid shirt took up his entire vision unfortunately. The woman's voice also sounded muffled for some reason as well.

"What did I say about calling me that? Honestly." The woman huffed again. Boots echoed against the cement floor as she approached. "There you are."

He blinked in surprise before he glanced at Gabriel. When had Sheriff Mills arrived? And why? She should have been with the girls in Sioux Falls. Not here in the bunker. Had something happened? Was Claire all right?

"How are you feeling, Castiel?" she asked gently, giving the Seraph a warm, loving smile.

"How do you think he feels?"

"Gabriel, I swear to—don't make me shoot you," Jody remarked coldly, her eyes darting to the archangel as her hands went to her hips. She was wearing her civilian clothes and not her uniform.

"You need to lighten up, Mom," Gabriel replied with his usual shit-eating grin.

She smacked the archangel hard again in the arm.

"Go see where Dean is," she ordered, glaring harder at the sandy-haired man.

"All right." Gabriel's eyes then darted back to Castiel before he gently ruffled the younger's hair affectionately. "Be good for Mom, all right, little bro?"

"Gabriel!"

The archangel chuckled loudly but left without another word, snapping his fingers.

Jody sighed quietly the moment Gabe was gone. She turned back and smiled at Cas.

"So, let's try this again. How are you feeling?"

"Better than before, I suppose," answered the angel quietly. His eyes then narrowed as he glanced back at the door. "Sheriff?"

"Jody, Cas," she replied, glancing back. "You can call me Jody."

"As you wish." He forced a weak smile to his lips. "Why is he referring to you as 'Mother?"

"Because your brother is an annoying little shit," she stated, resting a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Which I'm sure you know better than I do."

Did he ever. His tongue ran lightly against his lips, tasting the salt from his sweat earlier. He craved more of the salty taste, which he knew was another sign of his failing Grace. He then laughed quietly as he thought how good a cheeseburger actually sounded right then.

"I apologize that you were called for this," he said quietly a moment later.

She waved his apology away, though. "It's fine. I had to drop Jack back off anyway."

"Jack's home?" His spirits lifted temporarily.

"He is." She smiled warmly at him. "He's in the library with the girls last I saw."

Was Claire here as well?

His stomach unexpectedly rolled then. He quickly sat up, groaning as he tried to push himself up in haste to rush to the bathroom. Jody moved back from him instantly and gave him space, likely realizing what was going on. He managed to get one foot down on the floor, but his other caught on the blanket. Jody tried to grab him, but he slipped through her fingers and slammed hard onto the floor.

He closed his eyes as he felt another wave of nausea surge upwards. Knowing he wouldn't make it, he tried to concentrate on his flickering Grace, willing it to dispel his discomfort. It, too, failed. He knelt on all fours, coughing violently as he felt the water expel from his stomach.

"Oh, sweetheart," Jody murmured near him before a bucket swiftly appeared in front of him. "It's okay. Use the bucket."

His hands grasped it tightly, as if it would be the answer to all his problems. Another wave surged forward. Helpless to stop it, he succumbed to the wretched action once more, hating himself even more for it. Several moments passed before he finally groaned, stomach empty. His body shook cruelly from chills that had seeped deep within his vessel.

"You good?" she asked lightly.

"No," he rasped, his body leaning into hers instinctively as she ran fingers tenderly through his hair. It felt nice. He liked it when Dean did this sometimes as well. When she paused, he groaned and moved his head slightly to seek more of her loving touch. "I would rather urinate for hours than that."

She laughed quietly, resuming her gentle carding of his hair. "Yeah. Being human sometimes sucks, doesn't it?"

"Indeed." His eyes slowly closed as he felt himself relax. He could almost fall asleep if she continued this. Which he hoped she would. It was nice. "Ineffable."

"What?" she replied with a soft laugh. "Been reading Good Omens, have we?"

"No," he murmured, his breathing evening out. He had never felt this at peace before. There were moments with Dean, but this was different. "Gabriel forced me to watch it," he explained, "claiming he was nothing like that version."

"Yeah. He's definitely no Jon Hamm. That's for sure."

He smiled weakly. No. His brother was not. As he heard the door creak open, he glanced towards it. Speak of the amber-eyed devil.

Gabriel walked in a moment later, his eyes briefly flickering to the spot where Cas had gotten sick. Without a word, he snapped his fingers, and the mess vanished on both the floor and in the bowl. His face was neutral, but his eyes conveyed his concern.

"I may be no Jon Hamm, but I am your kickass, awesome big brother, brat," remarked the sandy-haired archangel a moment later. "So awesome, in fact, I got Jody and the kids here for you. Not to mention, I've been keeping your boyfriend in the loop with everything."

"How far out is he still?" asked the sheriff of Sioux Falls.

"Said they were just pulling into Lebanon now. Should be about five or ten minutes from now," the archangel answered respectfully, his tone taking on a rare seriousness.

"Good." Jody sighed quietly before she turned back towards the angel she was holding. "What do you say to us getting you back into bed, hmm?"

Cas groaned instantly. He didn't want to move at all. He was finally comfortable and relaxed.

"I know. But it's going to hurt like a bitch later if you don't," she explained softly, her fingers still carding through his hair gently.

"It already hurts like a bitch," admitted the Seraph glumly. The ache was low, deep within his joints and bones, but clearly there.

"Come on, Cassie," drawled Gabriel, stepping forward and gently grabbing a hold of him. "Up you go." He practically carried the Seraph back to bed before he set him back down.

Castiel huffed the moment he felt the memory foam mattress again. When his big brother then pressed a hand against his forehead, he frowned. Gabriel was fussing again. He hated when his brother was fussing like this about him. He was fine. Weak sure, losing Grace yes, but he wasn't utterly useless and pathetic like Gabriel was acting like he was. Honestly. What if Dean walked in and saw—

Whiskey-colored eyes snapped to the baby blues harshly.

Cas winced instantly, his eyes falling to the blanket guiltily. Had he broadcasted that across Angel Radio? He hadn't meant to if that were the case.

"Then your precious boyfriend," his older brother commented, glaring down at him "would join me in my annoying fussing over you, brat, and you would sit there like a good angel and let us take care of you because we love you. Got it?"

The deep blues gradually raised to meet his older brother's amber. He defiantly held his brother's gaze for a moment before the corner of Cas's lips tugged upwards slightly.

Jody stared at him somberly, as if she wanted to embrace him again.

"But I'm not a good angel."

"What?!"

"I'm not a good angel," he repeated calmly.

"How the fuck can you say that?" growled his brother, whiskey eyes hardening. "You are the best damn angel there is, Castiel!"

"No."

"No? No?!" Gabriel squawked. "Listen here, little brother—"

"I'm the rebel angel," Castiel cut in sharply, his bright eyes twinkling feebly in amusement. "Remember? The sassy one sometimes but definitely always the rebel."

His older brother paused for a moment, staring at him before he chuckled inwardly. All anger forgotten again. "Yeah, Cas. Yeah you are." He ruffled the raven, messy hair then before he glanced at Jody. "Oh, yeah, before I forget, Mom Number 2 needed your help."

"Donna, Gabriel. Her name is Donna," Jody replied with a long, suffering sigh. She then glanced at Cas briefly. "Are you going to be okay with him for a minute?"

"Yeah. We'll be fine," drawled the mischievous angel, grinning widely. "Thanks for asking."

"I was talking to Castiel, not you," she replied with a flicker of irritation.

"Ouch. Mom, why you gotta hurt me like that?" feigned the archangel, pressing a hand against his chest with a sad look. "First, Dad abandons us. And then you start dating again—"

Jody's jaw clenched painfully tight before she growled and whirled away, throwing her hands up into the air. "I swear . . ."

"Love you, Mom!" the youngest of four archangels yelled back to her, chuckling when she slammed the door shut behind her. "She loves me."

Cas huffed a soft laugh. "You mean like Sam does?"

The sandy-haired man's grin widened exponentially. "Exactly. He just doesn't know it yet. I'll win his heart yet, though."

Cerulean eyes rolled hard. "Just don't die again, brother."

"Only if you promise the same," Gabriel retorted, glancing down at him. He then sighed inwardly before he pressed a hand against Cas's forehead again.

"Why do you keep doing that?"

"Doing what?"

"Putting your hand on my forehead," he answered quietly.

"Why? Is it hurting you again?" Gabriel pulled his hand back slightly.

"No. It's just . . . strange."

"Strange?" His big brother scoffed, shaking his head. "I think the word you meant there is it feels nice, not strange. Humans do this sort of thing all the time when one of them is sick. Feel the sick human to check their temperature, signs of infection, etc."

"Yes, but we're not humans."

"Just shut up and let me do this, all right?" snapped the older angel sharply before he shook his head and took a step back, turning away from him.

Cas's eyes narrowed on his brother for a moment. He watched the silent archangel, noting the man's shoulders hunching up slightly as if Gabriel felt attacked for some reason. Though, Cas didn't have a clue why. He was merely asking a question.

"Gabriel?"

"What?"

Cas frowned at the rare coldness he heard in his brother's voice. "Why are you angry with me? Have I done something wrong?" He hadn't thought so. But then again, he had a whole list of things where he hadn't believed he was doing wrong and he really had.

"I'm not angry at you, kiddo," his brother replied, his shoulders sagging before he turned back. He smiled somberly back as he returned to Cas's bedside. "I just don't know what this is. Or how to help you. Or, you know, anything, and it's frustrating." He sighed heavily. "Because you shouldn't be in that bed sick like this. You should be—I don't know—baking Dean a pie or carving his name with little stupid hearts or something. Not this, though."

"You're worried then?" His head tilted slightly. "About me?"

"Of course I'm worried about you, idiot. You're my bratty little brother, and I love you."

"I'm fine." He caught Gabriel's eyeroll but said nothing. "You don't need to worry about me. I'm feeling much better now than I was before."

"For now."

"Yes, for now, but soon Dean will be home."

Amber eyes widened before they narrowed into slits. His brother drew in a sharp breath, forcing a deadly smile. He then made a noise that sounded torn between a feral growl and cold laugh.

"What?" It was true after all. Soon Dean would be home. Gabriel had said it himself after all.

"What?" repeated the sandy-haired man, inhaling sharply as his jaw clenched more. He held up a finger and then cleared his throat. "Oh, kiddo." His eyes closed, and he drew in another sharp breath. "I've been with you all night."

"Yes. I know that. And I appreciate it."

"No." He shook his head at him. "No, baby bro. This time—this time you're going to listen to me. Okay? Could you do that for me? Please? Because this is important. This is what sets us apart from the boys we love, okay?"

Cas nodded slowly, clearly puzzled by his brother's behavior. "As you wish."

"Thank you." Gabriel then ran a hand through his hair and sighed loudly. "I've sat with you all night. I've seen you curl in on yourself in that very bed, whimpering, crying." He held up a hand the second Cas opened his mouth. "No. Shut your stupid mouth. I'm talking here." He waited until Cas inclined his head again. "I held you so many times tonight, knowing you hadn't a damn clue because of how much pain you were in. I heard all the pleading, all the screams, all of it. Hell, I felt it too. Me, Castiel. Me! Your brother! Do you have any idea—any clue—kiddo, how that made me feel?"

The young Seraph stared back numbly, the words echoing in his mind. He could see his brother's control slipping more and more with each word, which he knew was rare in the older. The pain he felt now hurt more than the physical pain. His chest constricted, but he couldn't move.

"To see you in pain, to feel that pain, and know all I could do is hold you and give you a bit of my Grace to heal you? Only to learn later my actions meant to alleviate all that was just a temporary fix. That it would just start up again in an hour or so later and we would repeat the whole saga again and again." Tears streaked down Gabriel's cheeks as he held the wide oceanic blues. "I thought you were . . . I thought . . ." Amber eyes darted to the side of the room angrily, flashing with a spark of Grace before they returned to their normal color. "Kiddo, I . . . I lost you once. Okay?" He nodded slowly as if this was the most important thing in the world right then. "Because I left like the asshole I am. But I'm here now, Castiel, and I'm all in. I am! So, I need you to hear me."

Cas opened his mouth to respond, but Gabriel continued with his voice becoming even shakier.

"I am not going to lose you. That ain't an option! So, I'm going to figure this out. And if that means I have to move mountains, well, then by Dad's will, I'll fucking move them! I'll move them better and farther than Dad ever fucking did! Got it?"

"And that goes for me, too," a voice gruffly piped up from the doorway.

"Dean." Cas watched the tall, green-eyed Hunter in his usual flannel and blue jeans step into the room. He was home. Finally.

"Hey, Sunshine." Dean then glanced at Gabe and tipped his head forward. "Asshole."

"Cocksucker," Gabriel greeted back neutrally.

Sharply pressing his tongue hard against his right cheek, Dean raised a brow slowly, crossing his arms as he stared back emotionlessly at the archangel for a moment. "Seriously? That's the best you got? Cocksucker?" Dean scoffed, forcing his smile a bit more. "You're slipping, man. I've heard better insults from your brother than that."

"Yeah. Yeah. Whatever. I had a long night," huffed the sandy-haired man. "Speaking of, how was your session with Rogers? Get those Daddy issues worked out yet?"

Dean shrugged before he walked further into the room. "It was enlightening, yeah." Bright green eyes gave Cas a quick once over before the Hunter turned back to the archangel. "Saw our guest earlier."

Cas's eyes narrowed in confusion. Their guest? He watched Gabriel's face rapidly mold into a mask of neutrality, which added more to his puzzlement. What was he missing?

"Did you now?"

"Which guest?" Cas interrupted quietly. "Do you mean the girls?" Jody had stated the others were here with Jack as well. Warning bells sounded when he caught Gabriel and Dean's instant minute flinches at his question. Now, he needed to know. "Who else is here?" he demanded. Dean immediately glanced at Gabriel. They didn't respond. "Brother, answer me. Who else is in the bunker?" When he realized neither were going to answer, he shook his head. "I see." He drew in a breath, knowing he'd likely need it with how weak he was still feeling. "Then, I'll see for myself."

"Like hell you are," Dean remarked, quickly stepping up with Gabriel at his side.

Cas pushed them both away, stumbling slightly as he walked towards the door.

"Come on, man! Stop!" his Hunter pleaded behind him. "You need to rest."

"No." The angel turned back suddenly, his hand slapping hard against the wall to keep himself upright as he swayed dangerously. "What I need is for people to quit hiding things from me."

Dean's deep greens glanced once more to Gabe.

Gabriel shook his head, though, holding up a hand to the Hunter.

They were conspiring against him. How was he supposed to protect them both when they hid stuff all the damn time? Cas huffed thoroughly annoyed and turned back to the door.

"It's Balthazar. All right?" Dean finally called out.

"What?" He had to have heard that wrong. With his hand pressed hard against the wall again, he slowly rotated back to glance at his human. He saw Dean's heartbroken look and felt his stomach drop. His fingers dug into the wall to keep himself upright.

"In addition to Jack and the girls and everyone, Balthazar's here too, Cas."

Glassy blue eyes fell to the floor as the Seraph's head spun. Balthazar? No. It couldn't be.

"Well, you've—you've always got little old me," the ghostly voice echoed in his mind.

He felt the jolt of pain instantly as the memory from long ago flashed behind his eyes. He remembered clear as day the feel of his blade plunging deep within his brother's back. His Grace seized again violently inside.

"Cas!"

"Fuck! Move, Winchester!"

Two seconds later, everything went black, and the hot, blinding pain that had raced through his veins vanished. Everything disappeared into nothingness. And he let it.

"Cas . . ."

Next Time on Angel Flu: Grumpy Cas graces Dean with his presence.