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FICTION

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Non-Canon Chapter 1: Oddly Uneven

Series: Hazbin Hotel

Lilith stared quietly at the heated exchange she was watching unfolding before her.

A quiet huff, her eyes blinking dully at the fight both her husband and daughter were having over the girl's intriguing idea about a less painful way to 'clean-up' the limited realm of Hell itself from some of its inhabitants.

A hotel to redeem the sinners? She could remember when that curious poet, that polite man that was Dante Alighieri, had commented about something similar. He had been cautious, yet very eager to mention the existence of a third kingdom, a middle ground between Hell and Heaven, to properly offer redemption to the few sinners that had done the least dangerous of crimes.

An idea that had stuck to her for a long time and that she had unwittingly mentioned to her lovely daughter. Charlo-no, Charlie was a curious and innocent girl, strong and fiery too, but she was ultimately terribly naive and easy to influence by the fleeting ideas of bringing reformation to a reign of suffering and penance.

She had grown a sheltered childhood thanks to the combined efforts of both Lucifer and Lilith, yet the princess had been aware of what was going on outside the safe walls of their castle because of the paperwork her father was keen to whine about. When Charlie finally reached her adulthood, she was finally granted a first-hand experience of the cruel and unfair life of those that lived outside the former Angel's court and that had ended up fueling a stirring idealism within the girl.

A chance to deter the determined child pushed by Lilith's lover only ended up getting the girl in a fit, showing rebelliousness and denial at the fact that the task was… quite difficult, if not impossible, for her to reach out for.

Yet Lilith had to admit that when she had arrived to the Hotel with her husband, she had expected the girl to be in shambles. It wouldn't have been totally unexpected for the failure to appear even before their visit, and yet her baby girl had done well until now.

There was a delightful cast of people, the one she was mostly aware of were the current girlfriend of her daughter, Vaggie having already introduced herself during one of the past feasts by Lucifer's humongous home, yet the presence of both Angel Dust and Alastor, the so-called Radio Demon, was enough to make her stand surprised at what she had found out from this surprise visit.

It would have been a visit of courtesy too… but her lovely husband had to go out of his way to criticize the threatening aspect of having a deal-maker as Alastor in her hotel to… 'help her'.

It wasn't difficult to perceive the true reasons behind the deer-like demon as he didn't even bother sporting a lying facade or even deny the fact he wasn't here to truly help. But what truly got her floored just for a moment… was the fact that Charlie had indeed not formed a deal with him.

Surprising, quite relieving and a reason to be proud of her baby girl.

The younger blonde was more than happy to take the appreciative compliments from her mother, but her attention was mostly taken by the negative sentences coming from her dad.

Lucifer wasn't usually this brutally honest, especially around Charlie, and it had been an unpleasant development when he came hard with his task of closing the establishment without second thoughts, even forcefully if the situation required it.

Their daughter was, of course, unwilling to accept the stubborn decision and what followed next was…

Quite explosive.

Most of the inhabitants of the Hotel, even the 'ever-so powerful' Radio Demon, had decided to leave the premises of the room that had been turned in a battlefield. Both father and daughter were exchanging yells and physical attacks, neither of the two willing to show weakness to the other.

It had been amusing at first, Lilith was guiltily aware of it, but after a full two hours of intense brawling, even her blood-lust had simmered down. In fact, she had even gone to get herself some tea as she continued to watch over the seemingly-endless battle.

The Queen remembered of the times when Charlie would 'play rough' with her dad, but in those occasions it had been a simple hit or two, never an escalation of this magnitude.

The woman sighed as she took another sip from her cup, the relaxing beverage failing to get her nerves to cease in their annoyance over the matter, the vibrations echoing through the walls of the damaged room now resembling an earth-quake.

Should she have stopped them by now? That was a question Lilith was unable to properly respond as she felt uneasy at the fact she had to pick one of the two. If it had been a normal dispute of words, Lilith would have been more than happier to side by Charlie's points, the girl always bringing up some thoughtful explanations that did have some solid bases on them.

Yet now that the situation had grown to this kind of violence, it was non-negligible the fact that she couldn't truly join either of the two opposite sides without enraging and hurting the other.

It was so difficult to see both precious members of her family going for this painful predicament and… her mind couldn't help but wander at the curious event that had happened just a few years after being sent to Hell with her lover.

So much time had passed since that specific situation, yet she could remember vividly when Lucifer had tried to create some portals to leave the empty wastelands that once were the founding grounds for his kingdom.

Tentative experiments proved to either create explosions or bring inside the Pentagram some bizarre creatures. Nothing that could prove a danger to her husband, but still enough to push him to pursue more and more the opportunity to have them both leave the exile God had enforced on them.

It had been during one of these experiments that the unexpected happened and… some hope was granted to them in the form of another Lucifer, another Lilith… and children. The alternative couple's.

It had been surprising, yet her mind had exploded in giddiness at seeing that there was a good chance to produce an offspring despite her and her spouse's partially-different biology.

And she could remember holding that quirky troublemaker that was ickle Rizevim. The silver-haired boy had squeaked in adorable surprise at being coddled by the 'pretty lady' and she had giggled in amusement when her other self had kindly enough pointed out where the child's ticklish spot were.

Beautiful times, an experience that happened numerous times before Charlie was born and… then God discovered their play. His power denied them the chance of opening the portals after several visits and thus the means to spend their boredom away was deprived without mercy.

Yet, just as the other Lucifer had said, Hell would have become grand and their own prosperous fief. It took them some centuries but… a true Kingdom of Hell was born from their hard-work.

Sinners were given some minor reprieve in the towns resembling much of their past homes and soon a dysfunctional community of prostitutes, murderers and other dangerous fiends was born. A lovely family indeed.

And when Charlie was born, a cute little baby that had lifted their spirits even more, they were given a proper confirmation to their hopes and of their close familial group with much needed joy and childish wonder.

Then her childhood made way to her teenagehood and finally to adulthood.

The noise of a plate that had miraculously survived the onslaught crashing in the wall near the couch she was using was enough to bring Lilith out of memory lane and back to the real world.

She blinked, annoyance finally catching up to her tiring mind and she decided to try something quite… risky.

It was a known fact that God wasn't good in keeping up with the enforcement of rules he had dictated centuries early, especially now that his influence was half of what he once used to represent.

The 'ban' had to have been lifted to keep up with the draining costs of keeping Heaven safe and thus… Lilith decided to call in someone that could have truly helped with this situation.

The other Lucifer had shown to be a savvy family-man, managing to deal with the worst habits of little Rizevim while keeping a peaceful but genuinely happy appearance.

Surely he would know how to deal with this family debacle.

A small seal was formed and she pushed almost a quarter of her magical reserves on the irritating thing before someone did answer to her call.

The portal opened and her glee turned in confusion, her eyes widening as, instead of the white-haired human-looking Lucifer, someone much younger and… human passed through.

The young man tripped on the portal and landed face-first on the mugged floor with a soft but loud-enough thud.

I admit I should have expected that something weird today would have happened.

I could still remember waking up to a strange sense of… forewarning. I felt somewhat worried, concerned about something that was going to happen very soon and that had left me with a guarded and cautious stance for the whole school day.

Kunou had been concerned herself, but the cause of it was my very strange attitude. The others had noticed too and voiced their own confusion and interest over my paranoia and why it was feeling this strong that very day.

I was clueless and I was incredibly pissed by the fact that nothing warranting this situation wasn't happening. No immediate danger, no sudden attack against me, nor anything that could have had me panic at the presence of someone.

Everything was going fine for me during the lessons, during the breaks and even after I started to walk out of the premises of the school. Nothing worthy of this much uneasiness from my brain.

I was irritated by the lack of explanation behind this strange need to brace myself for something horrible, my mind trying to find 'reasons' where there was none. I took a few slow-paced breaths as I turned the corner of one of the empty streets I had taken, my heightened senses catching nothing that could have been considered harmful against me and… then I slipped through an open portal.

It had been unexpected and the window of action had been terribly conditioned by the distracted mind I had in that exact moment. My face protested quietly as it slammed merrily on some carpet, a groan muffled by the rug left my lips before I started to slowly get up from the floor as my ears caught the distinct sounds of fighting happening nearby.

I blinked as I saw two blurry figures exchanging some mad beating against each other and yelling at each other. They were speaking in… English? Really?

I feel like this place looks familiar.

Today isn't just my day.

'What a curious development.'

And while I continued to fail to understand what was going on where I had just landed, I heard someone coughing by… a couch? The woman had long blond hair, a dark-crown atop her head as… two large and curved red horns developed.

She was wearing a long, sleeveless dark-purple dress and… she wasn't human. Her energy was akin to a Devil's but… it was also denser, purer and quite powerful.

As my mind ended with this analysis, I noticed that the lady was gesturing me to approach her, seemingly unfazed by the ongoing battle breaking through the whole room. I frowned at the silent request but… it wasn't like I couldn't just defend myself in case of a trap.

I slowly walked towards her and… she patted the seat beside hers in the furniture and I obliged by taking refuge there. She blinked and she finally started to speak. "I suppose that this isn't certainly something that can be explained easily but… there is a context to what is going on."

I mean, we did suffer through crazier stuff, I think we can allow some proper contextualization before trying to get out of here.

I blinked again, slowly nodding and letting her continue with the explanation.

"But first, I've to ask you something," She admitted with an elegant but polite tone. "The spell I used was meant to bring 'Lucifer' to this realm. And you-"

"The portal worked… partly," I interjected with a small flinch at the mentioning of the long-deceased figure. "I can be considered 'Lucifer'."

She lifted a curious eyebrow at that and slightly tilted her head by the side. "Truly? I knew Lucifer and-"

"There is also a context," I interrupted one last time. "Just like there is a reason as to why they are killing each other over there." I pointed at the similar-looking duo, one was a male and the other female, both with blond hair and with a skin paler than a normal vampire.

The woman nodded in agreement. "I suppose it is something a little 'bigger' than what is happening right now," She mused quietly. "But still, since you are here, maybe you can offer me some… assistance with those two."

"Assistance?" I parroted in confusion. "You mean like getting them to stop to fight or-"

"That," The blonde jumped in with a sly smile. "And possibly offering a fresh perspective over the dilemma that caused all of this."

There was a slight pause at that and I found myself staring at the two angry individuals and…

Why they seem this close to murder each other out?

Could they be related? This does seem like a… family spat more than else.

'Siblings? Cousins? Maybe even father and daughter?'

I sighed and nodded at the lady, standing up from my seat and tensing my body up.

I breathed in and… then out.

The sudden eruption of energy caused by my Senjutsu mode was enough to make the room shake with renewed trembling, the pressure far greater than the one caused by the two fighting and… both individuals stopped.

The girl blinked in shock, her demonic features receding back to a more humane-looking appearance. She looked like a… mime?

Meanwhile the man looked irritated at best, his eyes narrowed at me and staring with some curiosity. I blinked back at him as I felt surprise rising from my chest at the fact that… his energy was similar to mine.

Before I could even do something about this development, I found myself almost tackled down by the very girl that had been fighting with the familiar figure. The sudden action took me out of my Senjutsu mode and I had my entire attention redirected back to the new 'issue'.

The young blonde squealed, her face adopting one of the cutest expressions of giddiness I had ever seen someone muster up. It was some serious competition for Kunou if I have to be honest.

She does look quite adorable.

"Oh my Gosh!" She finally exclaimed, hands straddling at my Kuoh Academy's uniform as she jumped quickly up-and-down. "A new client!" She said with rising… hope?

What?

"Actually-" I tried to reply back to that mistake but the woman that I had just finished to talk with decided to be the one to break the news to the amusing girl.

"Charlie dear, he isn't a client," The older blonde commented smoothly. "He is here to help us reach a peaceful agreement without any further fights," She said kindly before turning her attention to the approaching still-smiling man. "And that extends to you too, love."

The blond snorted at the order but complied to it as he came closer and… gave me an intense stare.

"Ya know," He said with an interested look. "I can feel you are a human… but you have also demonic energy in you?"

The gi- Charlie's eyes widened at the comment and she stared at me in utter shock. "You are a human? Like a… real one?" She asked quietly, taking an extra step forward to look right in my eyes.

Seriously, who gave her two gallons of pure sugar?

I frowned and then nodded at her queston "I am. Kinda." I admitted before facing back the woman. "And I think we have something to… debate about?"

"That's correct," The lady admitted and, before she could continue, the blonde stopped and gave a… slightly-embarrassed look. "I think I forgot my manners… I'm Lilith, and those two are my daughter, Charlotte, and my stubborn husband, Lucifer."

My smile froze and died at hearing the last name, a wide-eyed look snapping right at the smiling pale man. "W-What?" I blurted in shock and in response Lucifer frowned.

WAIT WHAT?!

"What? Are you perhaps afraid, boy?" The Ruler of Hell replied with an amused tone. "Worry not. I ain't biting until I see some 'delicious' steak in front of me." He clicked his sharp teeth and I felt panic rising even more from before.

"Dear, can you not disturb our guest and-" She stopped to stare at me with a confused look. "And I thought you were also Lu-"

"I said there is some 'context' but-"

Charlie butted in with a single cough. "Okay, what is going on here?"

I sighed as I found their collective stare on me and… peer pressure did quite the trick.

We were sitting by the couches, another had been created in front of the already-existing one and I began explaining about the… loops and the Duality behind my identity and Lucifer's. I had partly expected one of them to ask for further details, but they decided to merely listen in silence as I went through with my summarized response.

I ended with a sigh, my stare directed at the floor and… Lilith patted my back in an attempt to bring some comfort. "That sounded like you had the most difficult of burden, young man," The woman admitted, gaining a nod from her husband and… Charlie blinked in awe at the tale.

"You mean to tell me that… you are kind of dad but also not?"

I stared up at her question with a frown before having both my cheeks cupped by her hands. She was humming as she looked closely at my blushing face, her own sporting some red at the sudden closeness.

Then the girl let go and smiled. "That means you can tell me if my idea can work or not."

Without hesitation, I was given some paper with words and drawing on it, describing Charlie's plan of… creating some 'Happy Hotel' with the function of Purgatory. I mean, with the depiction of some evil 'Angelic' monsters ripping apart souls on a yearly basis, I could see it as something noteworthy but…

Why there were drawings with crayons?

...Is this the real issue behind the fight?

Probably.

This is… insane.

I think we are beyond that degree of madness, but yes.

Lucifer snorted at the words coming from his daughter's mouth. "Surely, you have to concur it would be foolish to try something this silly and-"

"It can actually work," I interjected with some hesitation, flinching a little at her confused scowl. "I mean, I know that Heaven was trying something like that to get… more followers to the Church. I know that sinners can be redeemed under the word of God or Michael."

Charlie's eyes glowed in sudden hope. "That means you believe it?"

I blinked. "Mostly," I said quietly, causing her expression to freeze in surprise at the mild-response. "While the outline is good, I don't think there has been some proper thinking about the 'means' to reach the redemption."

She frowned, ready to reply back to it and… she stopped, a little pout on her face. "I mean, how much can it be difficult?"

"Impossibly so, darling." A new voice called out by the door.

We all turned to see… a smiling deer-man?

He was wearing a dark red pinstriped coat along with burgundy dress pants. His skin was gray and his eyes were entirely red (both irises and scleras) with the only exception being the black pupils.

He started to slowly walk towards us and my attention diverted for a moment as I saw some other heads peeking from the now open door.

The first one I saw was a single yellow-black eye and a pink x where the girl's left eye was supposed to be, her narrowed look showing some irritation at my presence, yet there wasn't much anger about it. The next one looked to be some… cat-like furry man? He had long red eyebrows, dark scleras and orange eyes, a black top hat sitting between his cat ears. Then was the turn of the smiling fellow that was giving me… a flirty air-kiss- Nope.

I quickly turned to the last one and I was greeted by a cheerful-looking eye of a short female cyclops. She had some well-styled red-hair and seemed to be quite intrigued by what was going on in the room.

"A-Alastor?" Charlie asked out-loud, then realizing of the rest of the group silently peeking at the room. "And the others too?"

"We were quite worried that our beloved heroine had died against her angsty-filled father." The red-themed being replied with its… radio-like tone. "And yet we see her talking with an interestingly-confusing young man that seem to be undressing everyone with his stare. How shameful!"

Wait what?

"V-Vaggie- there is a reason- he isn't a suit-" The blonde tried to explain but… soon the lone-eyes girl that I had spotted the first among the bunch of odd people waiting by the door stomped inside with a somewhat angry scowl plastered on her face.

I could see her in the fullest, her long pale hair ending just below her knees, she was wearing quite the simple white casual dress with gray details. She was pissed and… she was aiming her fury at me.

I gulped nervously as she approached the couches and…

"Nyah~? Attacking my darling, weren't nyah?" I felt a familiar set of arms wrap behind me and… I could feel her chest too as it pressed on the back of my head.

Kuroka smiled threateningly at Vaggie, a quick stand-off emerging from the sudden appearance of the cat-girl and-

Then someone clapped once, drawing the attention back to her.

The red-haired Lilith was smiling brightly as from behind her a large portal had emerged. "To think that we would have found each other again, darling." The widow of our Lucifer said with a giggle, causing the same-named woman to giggle in response.

"To think it would have been after so long," The Queen of Hell smiled at the group appearing from the other side of the portal. "And I see you are not alone."

Soon, Akeno and Akua joined Kuroka in the embrace and… the Chibi Army arrived in full-strength.

Kunou led the charge with Lith, Koneko, Ophis and Maria following closely. The three young women made way as I was forcefully tackled in the couch by the battalion of cute and… I had to muster quite the effort to hug them all while also keeping the half-Succubus from touching anything 'that did not need any touching'.

"Niichan!" The kitsune said with some tears coming from her eyes. "I-I thought you have been kidnapped a-and-"

I didn't let her finish as I quickly tightened the hug and snuggled over their heads. "What a bunch of cute worrywarts~." I commented amusingly, causing a collective giggle to be lifted up for everyone to hear.

"So you are not a… suitor?" Vaggie finally asked through the noise and I blinked at her.

"Technically, Charlie and I are… related." I replied flatly, making her a little embarrassed at the assumption.

"O-Oh, I see and I'm so-uh?" The girl had barely enough time to speak that she was pulled in an embrace by her girlfriend, the princess of Hell snuggling her face on the back of her head.

"And you are my cute worrywart." The blonde copied my comment, yet it was effective enough to get a blush and a twitchy smile out of her.

Then the rest of the Hotel's crew joined in and some chatting was spared in what looked to be a particularly pleasant day to spend… with 'family'.

Kind of cheesy, but I guess that would do for now.

AN

So… I've tons of stuff to say here.

Why Hazbin Hotel? I adore it, I need it and… did I say that I NEED IT~?!

But seriously, the reason why I wanted this is… I just felt it works as a non-canonical x-over. Just a hunch and…

Also why I will not make any Fanfic out of the single Pilot. I know that the Second Episode will released soon (the trailer even sooner by what the recent upload from VivziePop's channel said) but I can't build a story out of little lore. There is 'some' stuff in the Wikia, but it was also said that most of the lore 'could end up being different than initially planned' and thus I don't want to… mess things up.

And yes, I might think of doing something with Helluva Boss, Brandon Rogers being one of my fave fun youtubers and… the rest of the cast is utterly amazing. Everyone (except the sassy brat) are wonderful to listen to and I want to see… EVERYTHING!

Lastly, even though I know it will never be seen by any of the group making the two series… Guys, you are all amazing! From arts to dubs, from music to sound, I love y'all and I hope this project will proceed to its planned end. Thank you for your efforts and I pray you all succeed!

Future milestone 1: 1000 Followers and Favorite.

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Wacko12: Resurrection of Lucifer and 'creation' of the New Lucifer with TTL MC and Trihexa.