Dear Diary,

I will never write those words again. That looks absolutely awful, and I suspect that "Dear Journal" would only be slightly less vomit-inducing. I sat and stared at those two words for what felt like minutes on end just now, after putting them to paper and wondering what the hell I was thinking. Unfortunately, given that this is written in pen, erasing and starting anew isn't an option, and I'm not tearing out a perfectly good page just to get rid of a duo of words. I guess the only option is to continue, and ignore how lame this introduction has now become. I must admit, I'm not nearly as upset about it as I otherwise would be- I'm in a very, very good mood.

Night has fallen again, one day since my last entry. Today was a whirlwind not just because of my liberal semblance usage, but because of the events that transpired during our journey and the early evening just before now. In the interest of chronicling everything important that has occurred, I'll do my best to thoroughly cover the events of the day, instead of skipping to what happened mere hours ago. The last thing I want this journal to become is a list of wistful, hopelessly pathetic thoughts about Cin. That being said, I have a feeling that such a thing is inevitable.

There's also the matter that she asked me to call her Cin, whenever we're in private, but that's a whole other matter that I'll get to later in this entry. For now, I need to focus on the events of the actual day itself. I need to focus better, in general. Something odd has come over me lately, and I'd rather not think about the possibilities of what it could be. Moving swiftly onward.

To start at the beginning, the caravan was finally beset by thieves today, for the first time since I signed on. According to Cin, the numbers with which they attacked far exceeded the other attempts, though their garb and strategies were different from those of the previous bandits. Neither of us recognized their dress or symbols, and there are no dead or scraps of clothing from which to closely study either one. That almost wasn't the case, but I managed to prevent any usage of lethal force. Barely.

Cin is absolutely terrifying in combat. While I thought that she was an imposing woman just by talking to her, watching her fight is something else entirely. She moves with a purposeful ferocity that makes it seem like each and every one of her opponents has somehow personally offended her just by being within her line of sight. I watched in awe as she employed her semblance against two attackers at once, and triggered a powerful water jet to knock one raider far away into a sand dune while the other was bound in thorned vines of some exotic plant.

The foe in foliage wound up kneeling before her, and within a second, she had the blades formed by the limbs of her arm-mounted crossbow leveled at his throat. She tried to threaten the man for information, and he spat at her through the tendrils squeezing around his face. Despite his incredibly stupid act of defiance, I could see from where I was holding off another bandit that the man had an uneasy, possibly drug-addled fear within his eyes. I engaged my semblance without a second thought, and used a gust of wind to blow Cin's aim slightly off course as she thrust her arm forward to drive her blades into the man's throat. The razor-sharp limbs instead dug deep into his shoulder, and she kicked him to the sand as he writhed in pain. Once the would-be thief was incapacitated, Cin turned to look at me with an entirely unreadable expression. A part of me was afraid that she would lunge for me, next. Instead, she simply offered a nod of understanding, and turned to fight off the next opponent nearest to her.

No more attempts at taking lives were made for the duration of the fight, and I was silently thankful that the bloodshed was kept to a minimum. I don't want deaths on my conscience, and especially not the deaths of men who belong to a faction or party that I don't even know. Cin fought with far more intent to maim and inflict pain than I did, but honestly, I cannot blame her there. Instating a silent "no killing" rule was already a compromise on her part, and this merry band of partygoers, whoever they may serve, were indeed trying to steal that cargo she and I had been charged to protect. Whatever we're delivering, it's definitely important, valuable, and likely not a secret. Not when a band of this number made such a grandiose attempt. We're only one day out from the city of Shade, such that it is, and its central academy. We can do this. I have no doubt that between Cin and I, we have this covered. I do, however, have doubts about our future beyond the delivery.

It wasn't long before the attempted robbery was called off, and the bandits retreated into the dunes. No one made an effort to give chase, and to be honest, I was quite exhausted after such a sudden, intense fight. I didn't see the punch on my arm coming when Cin threw it, and the sheer impact of the good-natured blow took me by surprise. Her punch is strong- likely stronger than mine- and it was accompanied by a full smile I would say was even stronger. It was the first time I had ever seen her smile with teeth involved, and I pray to every deity, existent or not, that it isn't the last. She said something to me, but I was too distracted by her smile to really register what she was telling me. I fumbled over my words and managed a nervous "you too". She laughed in response. I laughed along with her, wondering just how badly I had managed to botch whatever conversation she had tried to start.

The White Fang must have an incredible dental plan.

I most definitely do have an infatuation with Cin, and it's growing stronger with every interaction. This woman is so far out of my league that we're likely not even playing the same sport. I feel as though I've completely lost control of my thoughts and feelings, and I'm strangely okay with that notion. I trust her to lead me, for now, regardless of her affiliation with the Fang. She led me out to make another campfire around three hours ago.

For about an hour and a half, we sat and made small talk. Afterward, there was some stargazing, and trading of stories about constellations. She was incredibly knowledgeable about the stars. I tried to make up my own, and was promptly informed that that is not at all how constellations work. Regardless, she seemed amused, and put up with my stupidity. I didn't tell her that most of the stars just ended up reminding me of the devious, wicked, and intoxicating twinkle that so often graced her eyes. That's the kind of thing that has gotten me slapped in the past, and likely for good reason. I tend to become a poet when it's needed least, and I usually can't stop myself from saying my thoughts aloud. I'm glad that I somehow managed, this time.

I suppose it's a good sign that she at least pushed me her scroll information, unprompted. I happily accepted, and returned the favor. I wanted to ask about her plans after the delivery tomorrow, but I had absolutely no justification that wouldn't likely sound creepy. I've decided to simply take things as they come, and jump off that bridge when we come to it. I truly hope that she plans to remain in Shade for a few days, and that we can maybe talk in private. I need to know if the spark that I feel is one-sided or imagined. I need to know why she's with the White Fang. I need to know what she's doing next, regardless of all of those answers. I know that it likely sounds like an excuse when I say I wanted to monitor Fang activity, and she's the easiest way to do so. It absolutely is, at this point.

The ink stains on the opposite page of this one resulted from slamming this journal closed as quickly as I could, and I profusely apologize to whomever may read this in the future. Cin walked into my tent, lacking her sarong just as I was finishing the last sentence of the above paragraph. She's aware of the existence of this journal, and that fact fills me with a dread that I can't quite explain. I can't tell if she's the type to go looking for it, or to try to lift it from me while I'm sleeping or otherwise occupied. I can, however, tell that she likely wouldn't be pleased with the amount of words I've devoted to describing her beauty and impact on my current mental state. I waited until morning to write this, as I kept the book as close to my chest throughout the night as I kept her.

She said it was cold. I said she wasn't wrong, and asked why she had removed her largest article of clothing. She said that it didn't really help against the chilling winds that lowered the temperature of the air. I hesitated, and then said that she was welcome to stay. She said nothing and lowered herself onto the bedroll beside me. I stopped breathing, and eventually pressed my bare chest to her nearly equally bare back. Her body heat was far warmer than the sleeping bag flap I threw over us, and she didn't complain about the hard, rectangular journal pressed against her side. Fortunately, she didn't complain about any of the hard things pressed against her side, or even acknowledge their existence. I think she was doing me a silent favor. She absolutely knew.

We talked again, briefly. She told me that some of the things we're transporting are indeed going to Shade Academy, while others are going to various locations throughout the city. Those other items will be processed and distributed by the people in charge of the vehicles, though Cin wants to deliver some of it personally. I didn't ask what, where, or why, but I offered my services to assist her. She accepted. Cin also told me that she has a friend at the Academy, and is planning to check in with him. She invited me to join her on that visit as well, and I accepted. I have no idea what I'm in for, but I have a feeling it's going to be interesting, tense, and potentially lead to an even greater loss of control.

In short, I'm looking forward to it.

Author's Note:

This will almost certainly update again next week, with a somewhat longer entry than normal. Expect some surprises and new characters to get introduced. Not all of them will be OCs…

-RD