I've never traveled by airship before, but it's a feeling that I'm not exactly fond of, and I don't look forward to doing it again any time after this. The wind is harsh and biting, the air is freezing, and the constant rocking back and forth turns my stomach. Fortunately, our trip to Mistral seems like it's going to be a one-way journey, though it is indeed going to take several days. Given the fact that we're trying to remain hidden, the last leg of our journey will need to be on foot, in order to preserve the semi-secrecy of the location of the White Fang's forward base. I'm doing my best to hold in my nausea and keep my complaints about the cold to a minimum, but I've also set myself up to endure more hardship than I need to- I'm sharing a room with Shiv, for the duration of our time on the airship. It wasn't a move that I had planned, and it's honestly not one I'm thrilled about, but it is one that I feel is necessary.
Blake and Ilia are clearly close, to the point that I suspect something more than simple friendship may be going on between the two of them. Additionally, they're both females, so when they practically clung to each other when determining room assignments, no one questioned their motives. The idea that Cin and I would be sharing a room was also taken for granted, and likely explains Shiv's sour mood throughout the morning, as he knew he would be stuck alone for the majority of the flight. I'm getting the sense that Blake isn't his biggest fan, and he certainly doesn't get along with Ilia, for reasons that I'm not yet certain about. Upon partially figuring out the social dynamics of my new "team", I volunteered to bunk with Shiv, and let Cin share a larger room with the other two girls. Everyone seemed incredibly surprised by the move, Cin included, but I did manage to explain it to her later in private. She isn't upset, but she is disappointed. I can't say I blame her, and I plan to make it up to her with kisses, and perhaps, other things.
Fortunately, Shiv seems grateful that I stepped in and shook things up. While I wouldn't call us "best friends" by any means, I feel like I'm understanding him more and more as the days go on, and we're quite firmly opposites in many aspects of life. Hiding my emotions and focusing on others is easy for me, and one of few natural gifts that I'm incredibly grateful for. Shiv, on the other hand, focuses mostly on himself for reasons I've already detailed here, and couldn't hide his emotions if you gave him a literal mask. The disappointment and disgust that was plain on his face as the rooming situation was discussed is what made me suddenly jump in and volunteer to be his roommate. The move did indeed turn his mood around, and while we're not quite at the point of bedding down for the night just yet, and I therefore haven't seen him all that much today, I can tell that he's appreciative of my sacrifice. From someone like him, that's enough to make me feel like I did the right thing. Everyone needs to be in top shape for the journey ahead and our task of relieving Adam from his duties in Mistral. Given that I tend to fall into leadership positions, even though I'd rather not, I want Shiv on my side, ready and willing to back me up when I stumble over my words and make an ass of myself in a key moment. After all, despite the transparency of his motivations, he's a rather convincing, silver-tongued negotiator.
On the subject of negotiation, I spoke to Ghira once again before we left. First, I asked him about Adam, and the situation in Mistral. Literally everything he told me was something that I didn't want to hear, but that's more or less par for the course, at this point. Adam Taurus is an unlicensed former huntsman who attended Beacon Academy in Vale, and one of the founding members of the White Fang. Ghira either couldn't, or more likely, wouldn't tell me why he didn't graduate, or how long he was at the school, but he did say that there was "an incident" that led to him leaving, and the founding of the Fang. Saying that there was "an incident" when it comes to one of the leaders of the Fang is like saying there was "some touching" before a woman suddenly became pregnant, but I wasn't about to press for details, given that I'm the new guy and potentially on thin ice. Ghira explained Adam's views on humans, the outward base, and Mistral to me, and his explanation did little but give me a throbbing headache. I have very little to go on beyond a sealed letter that Ghira asked me to hand-deliver to the man, but I suppose that's better than nothing.
Ghira also told me that two others were in positions of power in Mistral, working alongside Adam. The first is Ghira's wife, Kali Belladonna. Apparently, Kali is working in parallel to Adam, though he is technically in charge of the overall base itself. Kali has the authority to order troops around, us included, and travel between Mistral and Vacuo as she sees fit. It's somewhat fortunate that we aren't being told to try to convince her to return to Vacuo, but at the same time, I pray that she isn't a wrench in our plans to call Adam back. The second figure, predictably, due to my life being what it is, is Sienna Khan, who is now apparently Adam's second in command. I have nothing more to say on that matter at the moment, and I'll jump off that particular bridge when we come to it. I suppose there is one thing to say about that situation, actually- Ghira was perceptive enough to notice my immediate negative reaction upon hearing her name, and informed me that he wasn't going to pry, unless I wanted to share. I chose not to share, which is a move that I feel I may regret, in the future. Even so- I appreciate his calm, understanding approach, especially compared to the approach that most other people have taken when it comes to learning about my past.
Despite declining to share my past with Sienna, I did manage to turn the situation around and use my apparent slip in controlling my expression to my advantage. I told Ghira about my parents and Oniyuri, and played it off as though that was the main source of my hesitance and discomfort throughout our meetings. I get the feeling that he knows it was a façade, and I think he knows that I know. Ghira strikes me as courteous and patient more than anything else, and it's likely those qualities that have kept him in power through the many storms that the Fang has endured up to this point. Oniyuri was one such storm, and Ghira told me that he knew of the incident, but not of any specifics off-hand. The meeting ended with Ghira asking me to give him my scroll information, and in turn he gave me a promise that he would send me anything he managed to dig up about Oniyuri, my parents, or the grimm that was seen in the burning village. In most cases, I would assume that I was merely being placated and blown off by the relatively quick dismissal I received. With Ghira, though, I get the feeling that he wanted to look into the matter as quickly as possible. I trust him, and that's due in no small part to the fact that I get along so well with Blake, which, in turn, is making me somewhat eager to meet Kali. I think, and hope, that the Belladonnas are a good, well-meaning family caught in a bad situation, and not the nefarious criminals that most of the world assumes them to be.
Speaking of introductions, another thing of note today was my introduction to Ilia. Regardless of where we land on the colleague/friendship scale, I will say right now that she's absolutely adorable, and her insistence on being incredibly serious, calm, and reserved at all times only reinforces that fact. On the scale of introversion, where Sun is the most extroverted, outgoing, and happy-go-lucky person I've ever met, Ilia is on the exact opposite end of the spectrum, while Blake is a notch closer to the center, and I sit fairly near to the middle, though still slightly on the side of introverts. Don't get the wrong idea- Ilia was pleasant enough, willing to speak about the mission, and present for every important discussion, but she never once offered her opinion to the group or made her stance clear on anything. She's very much 'along for the ride', somewhat like Shiv seems to be, while Cin, Blake, and I are focused on the specifics of the mission and our approach. I plan on making it a point to get to know Ilia better during our time in Mistral, or perhaps even on the airship, as Blake has told me that it takes a while to get Ilia out of her shell. Blake actually told me many things today after my brief meeting with Ghira, and one in particular is something that's making me feel uneasy.
Adam was apparently Blake's mentor, and I mean that in an all-encompassing sense. He was her sole mentor in combat, while he, Ghira, and Kali were together responsible for Blake's entire education. She was kept out of public schooling for fear that she would be recognizable as the Belladonna daughter, and her very existence has been a secret until recently. Since she's been in public, she's been using her mother's maiden name, "Moonglove", as her own, so I suppose that she wasn't just trying to throw Sun off the trail, but rather, everyone. Regardless- Adam is an important figure to Blake, and one that she admitted she sees almost like a father. In our previous conversations, I did most of the talking, while Blake listened and provided occasional thoughts. This time, the reverse was true, as I was trying to take it all in and determine what Blake was so afraid of. She speaks of Adam with a sort of twisted reverence, but it's permeated by fear. I guess it makes sense, given that he was an apparently harsh master, but still- it's a sort of fear usually reserved for an enemy, rather than someone who is almost family. I'm expecting the worst from this man, and I think Blake knows that. Somehow, though, that fact only makes it all the more unsettling.
I didn't think Blake the type to beg, but she's extremely convincing when she does it. Her eyes and ears are incredibly expressive when she wants them to be, and I can't tell whether or not she was trying desperately to tug at my heartstrings in a manipulative way, or being genuine with me. With Blake, though, I'm going to assume the best, as I truly, genuinely want her and her family to be good people. I can't shake the feeling that I'm baiting and walking into my own trap, but if that's indeed the case, at least I have Cin to help me back out. Blake pleaded with me to keep an open mind about Adam, and not to judge him too harshly. I asked if she thought that I would do such a thing, and she reassured me that I don't seem like the type to rush to conclusions, but the only other people she knew that were "fair" to Adam were her family, Ilia, and Sienna. I didn't have the heart to talk to Blake about just how "fair" Sienna can be to people, and I honestly don't think I'm going to go down that road at all, in the interest of keeping things amicable between us. I guess the fact that Blake apparently doesn't know about Sienna and I is a point in my ex's favor, as she isn't telling everyone about how awful I apparently am. I suppose I'll see how the reunion goes, before I pass judgment on her.
After a little more conversation about our mission, Blake and I parted ways, but not before I offered a hug, which she accepted. I'm not typically one for hugs, but I've come to like Blake, and see her as something approaching a little sister. I have a feeling that my relationship with her is going to become similar to what I have with Sun, and that there will be an equal, or perhaps even greater amount of strings attached at both ends. I promised her that I'll try to be fair to Adam and keep things civil, but I honestly don't know what's about to happen. I feel like I haven't really had a grasp on what's going on in quite a while, but that's nothing new. For now, I'm just going to wait for Shiv to get out of the shower and then take one of my own, before turning in for the night.
Oh, and just for the record- I turned 20 today. With everything going on, I don't think it really matters, and I don't celebrate my birthday, anyway. Part of me feels like I should tell Cin, but I don't want it to be made into a big deal. Too much is going on, and honestly, it isn't important. I don't even know if she would care about that sort of thing, and if she did, I don't want her telling the others. I don't need to be the center of attention, or have people fawn over me for something arbitrary. I'd rather they just do what they need to do, while I work on taking care of all of them.
I think I need to stop writing. I suddenly don't feel so good.
Author's Note:
We're back to updating fairly regularly. Hooray!
-RD