I Can't Get You off my Mind (And Maybe I'm Crazy but it's True)
Chapter Six: Fresh Paint and Shrimp Cocktails
Regina typically was a bit nervous when the time for her shows came to be open to the public. It was only natural for her to be a bit nervous, with loads of money and her reputation riding on the line. But this time, for this show, she was extremely nervous. Like stomach churning nervous. And it was because it was Emma's show. She wasn't too worried about Emma not selling any pieces. She was certain there would be at least several buyers. No, she was worried about having to come into contact with Emma.
She'd seen the blonde walking around in that sinfully black dress. It clung to all her curves and left miles of bare legs for Regina's eyes to explore. Emma had even curled her blonde locks so they flowed like princess curls over her shoulders.
And her scent...it was too enticing, almost like it had been magnified. It screamed at Regina across the room, even as the two women tried to give each other the most space they could in this crowded location.
Regina had to physically force herself to not stare at Emma, and she had to focus solely on the conversation she was making with prospective buyers. It wasn't an easy feat. Her body hummed and tugged in Emma's direction, always seeming to know where Emma was even without Regina looking, but Regina willed it to leave her alone. She just had to make it three hours and then this would all be over.
She just had to make sure neither of them made a fool of each other otherwise both of them would be mocked and then the art might not sell.
Emma knew Regina had smartly instructed them to stay on opposite ends of the room but as Emma helped herself to some shrimp cocktails- she was staying away from alcohol because she knew so little as a single drop could shatter her restraint- she could not help but look at her. Regina was wearing a plum royal dress and tall pumps that made her look so much more powerful and commanding. And she looked at ease talking to potential buyers.
Emma wished she could have her grace. She stumbled through conversation with richly dressed folk. When it came to asking about art, she could reel off facts and statements easily but, anything else and she was quite lost. All she did was smile and hope her charming looks would blind them to her fallacies.
But despite how confident Regina looked, Emma knew the woman could be a coward. Emma was bitter about how she and Killian had broken up, because Emma knew that there could be no more future for them, because she had found her mate, and yet, Regina could not do the same with Robin.
She had tried, yes, but what good had it been when in the end, she and Robin were still together and Regina was blaming this whole mess on Emma?
It wasn't right and their conversation from three nights ago sat sourly in her stomach like some bad milk. Emma wasn't going to back down, no matter how insane Regina was driving her. Why couldn't the woman just...woman up and do what was needed to be done? They were both in this too deep already and there was no point in extending their pain, so why? Emma was ready to commit.
It hadn't been easy to make that choice, because she had cared for Killian and had been happy with him. But she recognized that things couldn't go on like that. By lying and being in love with someone else, she was doing him a disservice. And because she cared for him, she would not continue leading him on in a fake relationship.
So she'd cut him off. It hurt both of them, more him than her, but in the long run it would be healthier than watching their relationship crumble and fall apart from the inside out. Because Emma knew, despite how much she had wished for a proper mate, she hadn't expected it to be this painful to have one.
A sudden ruckus drew her attention to the front, a loud man yelling at the security guard guarding the door. His voice sounded familiar and as she rounded the corner to see what was going on better, her heart plummeted to her stomach when she saw who it was. Killian. Drunk off his ass, with the bottle still in his hand, half empty and flailing his arms around as he tried to get past the guard.
The guard for his part, a burly man of tall stature, was gently trying to hold him back, trying to calm him down.
"No, I will not fucking calm down!" Killian hollered, drawing attention to himself. Did he have to show up and ruin her show? Could Emma not even have this one night, this accumulation of all her hard work, go peacefully? Did he have to be that big of a dick as to ruin it for her?
"Regina Mills stole my mate! That bitch stole her!" he continued hollering and Emma wanted to face palm. God, this was so not going good.
At the mention of her name, Regina was storming over to where he was, a storm brewing on her face. Behind her were two more security guards, both marching in step like they were about to go to war.
"Take him out. He is ruining my show with his drunken allegations!" she spat, loudly and clearly so that the audience of buyers could hear her defending and deriding his words. "A sad fool who has mistaken me for some other harlot, no doubt."
"Fuck you!" Killian screamed out, before trying to spit at her. But he was too drunk, so all it did was glob down the front of his shirt, this large white unsightly spittle. Thankfully, he hadn't noticed Emma this whole time, and as the two other men grabbed Killian by an armpit each, he was dragged out, screaming incoherently as Regina turned to the crowd and with her most charming smile, diffused the situation.
"I hope you all enjoyed that little show," she began, clearing her throat and hiding her annoyance at Killian well behind her confident smile. "Part of our exhibit currently. We wanted to bring a bit of the danger and vice that Emma paints in her works, and what better way than a paid actor."
At this the buyers all looked at each other, murmuring in low tones before one clapped and then another and soon they were all clapping at the 'performance'.
Emma let out a sigh she hadn't known she was holding in. She hadn't wanted her show marred by Killian and Regina had somehow saved it. So gracefully and easily.
And yet, Regina couldn't bother to make any efforts in saving her and Emma's relationship.
The rest of the evening is calm with smooth sailing. Regina secures several deals on Emma's art and then before she knows it, the night is over and it's time to shut down the art gallery. She feels drained, more so than usual, and its a combination of fending off Killian and that horrid situation, and the effort of avoiding Emma entirely.
They have not spoken a single word to each other this night and though Regina could see Emma's need to talk to her clearly writ on her face in longing looks, Regina refused to cave in to them. And now, with the show done, Emma simply grabbed her jacket and headed out into the cool night, Regina left alone in the huge space.
She suddenly feels burdened by everything that has happened. The messy situation with Robin. The one with Killian. And especially the maddening one with Emma. She's never been this stressed in her life, save except for when she was a young girl living under her mother's thumb.
She rubs her forehead and downs the last lone glass of champagne on a tray that hasn't been cleaned up yet. She holds the empty and cool glass up to her forehead, trying to relax her thoughts. At least the show is over. She won't have to see Emma after this if she doesn't want to. Won't have to come face to face with her mate anymore.
Regina closes her eyes and sighs out. Then she opens them and goes to over see closing.
Regina fires Emma after the show is over. It doesn't matter how good Emma's art is or how much money she made her. It's over. Regina will not have Emma tempting her no longer.
She doesn't even tell her in person, just through her assistant. It's shitty and impersonal and Regina's gut curls in on it's self as she does this, but she cannot care any longer. She cannot.
Even if she does.
She forces herself not to.
Surprisingly, Emma doesn't show up in anger, demanding Regina to explain this. Regina had been expecting her to, but it seemed Emma's words were just that. Empty words with no bearing behind them. No real promise. She's disappointed a bit but swallows it bitterly down. And as soon as the show is over, she flies home to Robin. Robin who is still waiting for her, loyal and deserving so much better than her, an alpha who can't keep it in her pants.
But if he's given her this second chance, then she won't squander it. She still wants to have a family with him, even if her tryst with Emma almost took it away. In fact, she takes a two month break from work, leaving Kathryn in charge of things at the base. Regina's going to stay home and work on her relationship with Robin and Roland. She'll do business from home, because right now it is important to her that she doesn't ruin things further.
Emma would be calling Regina a coward right now and Regina wouldn't be disinclined to stop her. She knows she's afraid. Afraid to risk what she has with Robin. But she risked it anyways and he's still there, stubbornly insisting they can work it out and so she would be stupid to give up this chance. Emma might not have been a good fit with Killian but that didn't mean it was the same case for Regina.
And so, in that hard headed manner of hers, she went about, intent on trying to fix her life.
By the third day she knew it was a mistake.
She badly wanted to fix things with Robin, but the distance between her and Emma physically ached. She could feel each thousand miles apart with a sharp stabbing next to her heart that sometimes made it hard to breathe when she remembered how far away Emma truly was. She tried to hide it, tried to focus on Robin and how much she adored him, but it was a fruitless endeavor. He could see her wilting before his very eyes.
Distance hadn't been this bad before for her, and it was because she knew she'd be coming back to being close to where Emma lived, and close to seeing her. But now that her body knew she was cutting off Emma for good, it rebelled. And Robin grew worried for her.
"Are you alright? Are you sleeping? Are you eating?" Robin asked, with barely concealed worry.
"I'm fine," Regina stressed but she was lying through her teeth. Her brows were furrowed as she tried to hide her pain. But it was clear she was failing to do this, because Robin was looking at her with so much unconcealed worry. Still, he tried his best to make her feel better.
On the fifth day, Robin did something so incredibly stupid.
"What is she doing here?" Regina hissed, turning angry eyes on Robin. Emma was standing on the doorstep. She too looked worse for the wear but she was holding on together better than Regina was currently.
"You...you got bad, Regina," he said, shuffling his feet guiltily. "You couldn't eat right, you couldn't sleep and you could barely focus on the surrounding world. I heard you crying out her name and I um, took it upon myself to find her."
"You idiot! I'm purposefully distanced myself from her because I'm trying to save our relationship and you go around and bring her here!"
"You were in pain!" he raised his voice suddenly. "I couldn't stand by and see you suffering!"
"This...this is a whole other brand of suffering," Regina interjected grimly. "You know what happens when I get near her-"
"We'll figure that all out later, okay," he soothed, placating hands in front of him. "For now, please, just...allow her to be here so your mate bond doesn't kill you both."
With a stare of ire Regina turned back to Emma who had tucked her hands in her back pockets. "Well, I feel super welcomed," she said in false cheeriness.
Regina rolled her eyes at this, tightened the hold on the blanket around her shoulders and allowed Emma to come in. It was ridiculous but the mere sight of her, the smell of her, it made her insides warm up and she stopped shivering.
She closed her eyes, briefly coming to terms. It seemed one way or another, this mate bond was here to stay. She might as well take this time to stop running from it and figure something out.
Emma was here for three days before Regina finally caved and talked to her.
"Oh, I didn't know you could talk," Emma said sarcastically as she, Regina, Robin, and Roland sat at the dinner table eating their meal in awkward silence. Roland had taken a shine to Emma quickly and the two of them spent much time playing video games and such.
Emma had a more tense and uncertain air around Robin but that was only because of the whole unpleasantness of the situation governing their lives. She did her best to come off as nice to him, with a hint of apologetic and guilty nature that he didn't seem to mind. He had a right to enjoy her simpering to him and her jumping eagerly to help around the house.
With Regina, of course, Emma and her had been on opposite sides of the world in terms of friendliness towards each other. Emma knew why Regina was being this stubborn and honestly it was getting old at this point. Whether Regina liked it or not, Emma was here to stay, or in the very least make Regina feel better and not kill herself over this mate bond.
Regina shot her a heated look at that comment Emma threw at her but Emma was past the point of caring if she offended the brunette woman or not. She was tired of this shit. Tired of suffering and she just wanted to be happy and Regina was making it a living hell to get to that point.
The woman even had the audacity to fire Emma without so much any common human decency. Just in the most impersonal way available. And Emma had been this close to storming over and demanding some respect from Regina but she had decided against it. What would be the point? It was clear Regina wanted nothing to do with Emma, so Emma decided she'd keep her distance.
She hadn't expected Robin to track her down out of the blue and beg her to come to their house because Regina was feeling highly unwell. Emma had stuck up her nose and thought good, at least Regina was suffering a bit for her nasty behavior towards Emma. But then, Emma couldn't just let this happen. Regina was her mate and this was probably symptoms of mate withdrawal that Regina was suffering from, which could be extreme.
Emma herself didn't have any because she had accepted that Regina was her mate. So her body could deal with it, with waiting just a bit longer until it could have Regina around. But Regina still hadn't accepted it, which was why she was feeling bad.
And given how she could glare at Emma over the table, she was feeling better ever since Emma had shown up, the mere scent of Emma's omega side calming the ornery Alpha.
"I can talk," Regina started, unable to hold back from being challenged. "I just don't feel like talking to you much. You are an interloper in mine and Robin's life."
Emma set her jaw into a hard line. "Not much of a life you've got. Your family is holding on by mere treads."
Regina's nostrils flared at this and it was clear she was going to say more but Robin put up his hands to stop them. "Please, let us not argue with Roland around."
The boy was looking on at all of them, big eyes wide. "Is Emma going to be my second mommy?"
"No," Emma and Regina chorused. One thing they could at least agree on.
"Aww, okay," he pouted and continued trying to eat his green peas. The rest of dinner was awkward and tense, Robin trying to break the atmosphere with his attempts at levity but it was no use. While Regina did feel better with Emma around- her body no longer caving in emotionally and physically- she also felt terrible with Emma around. Because it reminded her of her infidelity to Robin and to Roland. And yet, Robin was okay with Emma just being here. He had even brought her over. It was mind boggling. And Regina was upset at Robin for doing this. She should have had a say in this. She closed her eyes and sighed heavily. Damn it, she wasn't any closer to figuring out what it was she wanted and Emma had already been here for a while.
It was clear what her body wanted. But her mind didn't want that. It wanted everything to go back to how it was. But she knew she couldn't ask that of Emma because Emma would be stubborn and insist on staying. And there was no way Regina's body could do that either. It was locked in like a missile on a target that would only bring her onto a collision path.
As she went into the kitchen to drop off her dishes, she felt up her forehead. It was burning up. She knew her rut was due any time this week and she bit her bottom lip in worry. Her rut would not make things any easier and she only hoped Emma would be smart enough to stay away from Regina when the alpha's rut hit. Because Regina didn't want to make the same mistake twice.
A/N: Oh boy, Regina sure is being stubborn. And her rut is coming up...wonder what this could lead to...