It has been a month since Tori cheated on Jade. Jade and Beck are sitting on the couch watching TV when all of a sudden Beck turns and look at a very depressed Jade. She is looking at the TV but its not like she is actually watching. It feels like she is somewhere else entirely.
Beck knows that she misses Tori alot but too stubborn to say it out loud. He knows that Tori screwed up but he can't help but feel sorry for her. He knows if his parents said the things her parents said infront of him he would have probably done something even more stupid than this.
"You know you miss her. And I know that she has hurt you really bad but you have to try and forgive her" Beck said trying to make Jade talk to him but when he found no reaction coming from her he went back to watching the show.
After a couple of minutes Jade looked at him till he looked back and said "Forgive her! You want me to forgive her after she has cheated on me? You as well as I do know how I feel about cheaters. So don't tell me to fucking forgive her" she didn't say that in anger. Actually she hasn't got angry once since she has kicked Tori out. All she feels nowadays is hurt, real hurt.
"I do know how you feel about cheaters. But she is gay Jade. She didn't feel anything towards him. She only did it because she was under the influence of alcohol and her parents stupid words. You and I know that she will never do anything on purpose to hurt you Jade. You know how much she loves you and right now she is in a way worse shape than you are and that says alot."
Jade sadly chuckled " You know what's the funny part?" she waited till Beck shook his head and continued "We talked about. Her and I talked about if sleeping with a guy or even kissing him will be considered cheating and we did consider it cheating. She knew that that will hurt me, drunk or not she still did it. You say that she was influenced by the alcohol and her parents. Well didn't she think of me at all before she fucked someone else? Huh? Answer me Beck. Didn't she stop for a second and think how would I feel about this?"
Beck was about to answer but she raised her hand to stop him from talking and continued her ranting.
"I already know the answer. She didn't, you know how I know this? Its because if she did, she would have stopped. But apparently she doesn't give a fuck about me. In her pretty little mind only she came first. She didn't think who she was going to hurt nooo not at all. You know I didn't know that she didn't accept herself. I mean if she really did, their words wouldn't have affected her that much to do something that she promised never to do which is cheating on me. She always kept her promises but I guess there are a first time for everything" she looked back at the show wordlessly telling Beck that she has finished talking.
Beck was trying to collect his thoughts and put them in a way that will get to Jade. He wasn't sure if he can but he still gave it a try. "Jade, I can't say that I know what she was thinking when she was umm doing what she was doing with that guy. All I know that she was hurting and now she is regretting it deeply. You know she doesn't really eat much or even go out. She has been staying with Trina by the way but I think you have already figured that out. She misses you terribly and she is trying to fix stuff but you are not giving her a chance and I know why. You are afraid if you gave her another chance she will hurt you again"
Beck took a deep breath before he continued "You let your walls down just for her. You trusted her completely and you even shared secrets that no one knows ,only you and her know about it. You gave her your everything and she goes and screw everything up. You feel like she has stabbed you in the back and twisted the knife. But the thing is, at that time she didn't know she was doing that. Jade, she is not as strong as you. These words broke her and she is not perfect. She is only human. A human that loves you more than anything in this whole world"
Jade kept staring at the television but he knew that he might have got to her a little bit. He wanted her to think about it so he thought he better leave her alone for a while. So he got up put on his jacket and was about to leave but then he turned around and said "I really know that she have hurt you bad really bad but I want you to just think about it okay?" when he still didn't get any reaction he said goodnight and left.
Jade sat there and when she heard the door closing she started crying. He was right, she misses her alot but how can she forgive her after this betrayal. She doesn't know if she will capable to do it. Tori broke her heart. She thought that Tori will never hurt her that bad. Its funny how the people you put your whole faith in are always the ones who let you down.
Back at Trina's apartment Tori and Andre are having a kind of similar conversation. Andre has been gone for two months. He was in NYC for an internship and Tori didn't tell him what happened so he was mad at her for cheating and not telling him.
"How could you do something like that? You know she gave you all her trust but then you go and betray her? What the hell happened to you Tor?" Andre was pacing back and forth while Tori just sat there silently crying. She has been doing that since Jade kicked her out. There hasn't been a day that passed without her crying.
"I know I know okay? I screwed up big time but I swear I wasn't thinking straight. My parents hurt me and I was angry at them. I was drinking like I have never drank before and the guy was just there being flirty as ever and I just kept thinking what would happen if I slept with him, you know? He was good looking and he wanted me so I was like why not"
Andre cut her off before she continued " Well I will tell you why not. Because you have a girlfriend who loves you more than anything, because you have a girlfriend that will be hurt and probably never trust anyone ever again since she has trust issues and now you have doubled it. I know you regret it but while you were thinking "why not" did you ever just stop and think of Jade? Huh? Tell me. I really want to know" Andre was getting angrier but he was trying to control his anger seeing his bestfriend is already feeling awful but he still couldn't help it. She has hurt his other bestfriend and he also hate cheaters since that's how his parents divorced.
"I-I didn't" Tori said letting her head fall down in her hands as she continued crying "I didn't. its like my mind just fought the thought of her off and only came back after I have had slept with him. After it was too late I felt bad and I-I have regretted it immediately. I know she might never forgive me but I really want her to. She is the love of my life and I didn't mean to hurt her or do something as stupid. I haven't gone to see my parents since that night. Trina tells them that I am busy and that's it. A part of me blames them for this and I know that's the part that wants to throw the blame at someone else and I am the only one to blame here"
Andre looked her. He really wanted to comfort her but right now he can't. He texted Cat to come over and told Tori that he had to leave. After half an hour Cat arrived to see a puffy eyed latina lying down on the couch staring at the ceiling.
"Hey Tori"
"Hey Cat" Tori said without even looking at her.
"Andre told me what happened with you two and he shouldn't came at you strong it was wrong of him"
"No. Andre was right. I screwed up Cat and now she doesn't even want to see me or hear my voice. She hates me and I deserve it." Tori sat up and started crying again.
Cat sat beside her and put her arms around her. She hated seeing two of her bestfriends like this. And she really wanted to fix it. She wanted atleast for both of them to talk it out.
"How about you two sit and talk?" Cat asked looking down at her bestfriend.
"She doesn't want to see me Cat. Let alone talk to me. She will never agree to this"
"Just leave that for me. And tomorrow at 2 pm just be at the jet brew near your apartment. Okay?"
"Okay" Tori didn't know how will Cat do this but she was hopeful that she will be able to get Jade to talk to her.
The very next morning Cat arrived at Jade's at 1:30 pm. Jade was surprised to see Cat since she usually calls before she comes over.
"Hey Jadey" Cat said hugging her bestfriend.
"Hey Kitty cat" Jade smiled at Cat. She was in actual need for this hug. "So what are you doing her Cat?"
"Well I was thinking we can go to get some coffee from the Jet brew that's around the corner" Cat said giving Jade the most innocent look she can master that makes her always says okay even if she doesn't want to.
"Okay. I will just go change. Be right back" Jade went to her room changed fast and came back.
On their way to the café they did small talk. Well mostly Cat talking she wanted Jade to be less crappy when she saw Tori. What she didn't know was that Jade was already thinking about talking with Tori. The talk she had with Beck made her think and she wanted to resolve everything.
They arrived and there she was Tori sitting in a corner. At first they haven't noticed her but then Cat did and started going to her while pulling Jade who still hadn't noticed her because her mind was elsewhere but when she did notice to say that she was surprised would be an understatement.
Cat pushed Jade into the seat that was infront of Tori then said bye and walked fast towards the café's door and left.
"I get Cat didn't tell you that you were going to meet me?" Tori said not really making eye contact with Jade.
"No she didn't. She probably thought I would say no. But I wouldn't have" Jade said looking at the woman who she once trusted.
"You wouldn't have disagreed?" Tori asked still not making eye contact. She was scared of what she will find out if she looked in Jade's eyes. She knows that she will most definitely see hurt, and she hates herself for being the person who caused that.
"No I wouldn't. I wanted to talk with you. So I am going to say everything I want to tell you and you are not going to utter a single word till I finish. Understood?" Jade waited till Tori nodded her head then started.
"You know how much I hate cheaters and you cheated. I don't give a fuck that he was a guy. It still counts as cheating in both of our books. You have hurt me really bad Tori. I trusted you. Infact I gave you all my trust but you went and threw it in my face. Do you know how that made me feel? I felt pathetic, angry, sad but most of all hurt. That the one who I truly loved and gave my all, is the one who have hurt me the most" Jade stopped to wipe a few stray tears off her face. Tori was now looking at her with tears in her eyes. She knew she has hurt her but to actually see it, was breaking her heart even more.
Jade then continued " You broke my trust and I don't know if I will ever trust you again. I know that you did it because of your parents words but that can't be just it, can it? Were you ashamed of us? Wasn't I enough for you. That you had to go and fuck him? You know, now everytime I close my eyes I just see him touching and kissing you. Do you know how does that makes me feel? You knew about my insecurities about me not being good enough and you still did this. You still betrayed me. You slept with someone that wasn't me. You broke my fucking heart Tori" Jade now was crying like there is no tomorrow.
Tori tried to reach for her hand to comfort her but Jade pulled it away and was trying to hold herself together. After several minutes and Jade said nothing Tori took that as her queue to talk.
"I never meant to hurt you. I will never do something like that on purpose. It has just happened. I know that I should have been stronger and not let their words get to me but it did and I fucked up. I am sorry. I know that sorry will never be enough but I want to prove to you how much I regret it and how much you really mean to me. I want to fix it. Just give me a chance. I will even come out to my parents if you want to. But just give me another chance."
Jade has stopped crying, looked at Tori and said "I don't know if I can ever trust you again and right now I can't be in a relationship with someone I don't trust. If you really want to fix this then you will have to work hard to earn my friendship before any relationships. I can't promise you that we will ever date again but if we will ever reach the point we were at before you will have to really work hard for it. You broke my trust in the worst possible way and to fix this it won't be easy."
"I know and I will do my best I swear. I want you back and I will do whatever it takes. I love you Jade and if starting from the very beginning is what you want then I will gladly do it"
"Good. Next week lets gather the gang and hang out. We haven't hung out as a group in a while" and with that Jade stood up and left Tori to think on how will she win Jade back or even if she will be able to reach the level that they were once at but she knows that even if Jade won't take her back as her girlfriend then she will just be satisfied to be her friend. Having something is better than having nothing at all.