Steeped In Lies

by JacklynnFrost

When I was so young I can't fully remember, I was betrothed to an enemy royal to cement our shaky peace after the war between the races, Demons, and Goddesses. Since then, I have lived caged in, locked away from all that is in the world... it was for my own good. But as the truth unfolded and I started to make my own choices, I realized everyone I love is a liar. Art by Lemaskdra!

15. Chapter 15: Savior

Chapter 15: Savior

The Manta sways under us, our backs pressed together and the blankets tucked around us because it's cold up over the clouds. My eyes strain to read the text by the moonlight alone but I need to figure this out. We have been to the demon clan, tracked and asked around and our biggest lead involves Ban, so we are on our way to his last known location.

Our food sack is half full, the both of us eating lightly to preserve it and so far we've needed very little of my gold. Mead knows his way around people and as he snores behind me I glance over with a smile, glad to have him here. Alone I'd have been lost, literally and figuratively. With a deep breath, I refocus on the book. The more I read the more I doubt I am Meliodas' mate. He's not bitten me to mark me, he's never left his scent on me, although I guess I can't know that for sure. But in the margins he wrote, 'she smells like summer breeze'. Which is neither here nor there as I don't know how I smell.

I turn the page, instead, looking out at the vast expanse of clouds that cover the world as if it has the answers. Was Meliodas so in control of his instincts that he resisted the book's claimed 'overprotectiveness' and the 'overwhelming attraction'? This text made it seem so hard for a demon to resist all that it warns about, yet warn it does. Every few sentences are deep cautions on just how wrong it can go if a mate outside the demon species is pushed and with Meliodas' notes I wonder if those were enough for him to contain himself.

A note I can't shake was one written beside the section on 'the jarring experience of when your inner demon is unleashed to bring a mate to submission,' said, 'I won't risk her life for my own desires'. Is that thought enough for Meliodas to deny himself? With how over-cautious this author is and how devastating he makes the guessed at consequences seem through the text, maybe Meliodas took it dead-serious. Of course, when the book outlined how demon mates fight for dominance, that one must be the alpha, that alone is terrifying but the section after is all about how difficult it is for a demon to let that instinct go.

My mind scatters as I wonder if that's why he fights, why he seems to enjoy taking a beating. That he has outlets for what his inner demon wants, things that I can't give him. If, my tears brim, if I am his mate. I both wish I am, as then I will know our true standing, but don't as all I'm truly learning from this book is how ill-fitting I am for him. After each chapter, where my anger fades from my own sympathy, I have to read the missive of him abandoning me to spike my rage once more.

I list off his lies, his withholdings and his lack of including me in my own life decisions before I go on reading. We have a long flight ahead of us and I rub at my eyes to stay awake. I start the next chapter, frowning as it lists the possible demon coping mechanisms to assist in conquering their beast's drive to claim before their 'other' mate is ready. 'The fear of killing her by my own hand is enough.' I bite my lip, skipping reading the rest of the suggestions to see, 'She's gentle by nature', and when I turn the page a slip of paper is inside with a rigorous training schedule outlined.

I read on with a heavy heart, growing used to the feeling of carrying so much. Maybe this is why he didn't want to tell me. 'It is imperative you always listen to your 'other' mate's body language for any discomfort. Our instinct drives us forward but they do not have that same urge. It's beautiful when you come to appreciate it, that every touch is earned, every smile a gift given as it is not manufactured by deep magic of fate but pulled forth from your efforts.'

I hadn't thought of it like that. The chapter ends with more warnings but I zero in as the author shares something personal I've not seen them do before. 'I am sure if you are reading this that you know of the story that follows my name. It's true, and I want to prevent anyone from going through the hell I've created for myself. If your mate ever expresses discomfort, listen- they are facing a foreign beast when they trust you, do not let her or him down.'

Being unfamiliar with demon legends and stories I have no reference to what he is hinting at, but thus far I can guess that something horrible happened to his mate. That he must be a demon and she must have not been. I frown, sticking the missive in as my bookmark to turn to the cover. 'Gowther the Selfless' penned this and I wonder if he forced himself on her or hurt her, that maybe him helping others in a similar situation allowed him to come to terms with whatever occurred.

I put my things away, making sure they are secure before snuggling down into the blankets myself and finding unrestful sleep worrying about our course while the beast is unmanned.

Our day starts early when we make it too late to the fighting tournament, being told by the man in charge that of the people we were looking for, only Ban showed up, no Captain. We tracked our way to their hotel and from there get another lead that only costs us a few coins.

We agree that Ban is the most likely one to know where Meliodas has gone. Even if he wasn't told directly, he'd have some ideas. With nothing else to go on, it's all I have to hope for. That night I pay for us both to have a hot meal and a real bed. We bathe, separately of course, and while Mead takes off to 'see what the town has to offer', I snuggle into the mattress with my book to try and make headway.

'This undertaking is the greatest challenge you'll face, but if done correctly the rewards will be ever-giving. On the other side of that coin, just one mistake, an unforgivable mistake... it will cost you everything, all your progress and depending on the severity, your mate entirely.' I scoff at the dramatic turn in this chapter, wondering if Meliodas really soaked this up as readily as his notes suggest. He wouldn't take notes if he didn't take this seriously, right? Yet, in our situation, doesn't he think his mistake is terrifying me, is that enough for him to think the damage is irreparable? I read on, hating that my anger is a low rumble when I need it to drive me on.

'Let her lead. If your mate initiates contact, our instinct is to claim where she may have only intended to give affection. Depending on their understanding of sex it could be even purer than that- a want of a connection and if you've made it this far I envy you. To feel what it's like to be wanted in return must be marvelous.' The time I smelled him in my bed comes to mind and I know now that when his eyes go dark that it's his beast awakening. He wouldn't look at me, so afraid to scare me but what if it was this too, that he didn't want to tempt his demon into claiming me.

Meliodas' notes give me more insight. It explains his blank faces and tight formality. I like to believe he was himself some of the time, like when he was Captain but as I fall asleep I wonder if it really was such a good idea for him to read this book. He's made some bad choices. I think he closed off almost completely to the point I still have a hard time believing I am his mate as he seems to have never let his instinctual inner beast do anything it should have wanted to.

My throat tenses and I wish again, just before sleep takes me, that Jelamet was still here to shake some sense into me. I have ached for so long. Since as far back as I can remember there has been an emptiness inside, but since she died and Meliodas left, nothing makes it ease. Not tea, not sleep, not warm baths or talking with Mead. The things I love are slipping through my fingers and tears leak long into my unconsciousness.

Dreams are fleeting, ill remembered but Meliodas' words, so absentmindedly spoken to his brother at the vampire ball float in my mind. It's the only thing I hold onto as I wake. Heavens Theatre. It's an underground fighting destination that he frequents, one that lets anything happen if there is enough money involved. He told his brother that, flippantly. The sun is peeking over the trees, just barely lighting the room as I rush from it in my pajamas almost colliding with a poor maid as she carries sheets down the hall.

After a quick apology and shared smiles, I rush to the doorframe next to mine. Mead's room is locked and I rattle the knob, calling out to him before knocking. "I have a lead!" I rush, I grow louder, knocking and knocking until finally, I call out, "Mead!" The door behind me bursts open, causing me to flinch.

"I'm all for drinking this early, but for fuck's sake, keep it down." The voice is gruff with sleep and slowly I turn, wide-eyed as I recognize who is here. His red eyes are round when they meet mine and my mouth gapes. "Liz?" He asks, "Shit, we were talking about finding you last night. Cap'n is losing his shit, said you two broke up and he's... strung out. Said it was all his fault, regrets everything." Ban pushes his hair back, making the spikes stand taller as he winces. "What the fuck happened?"

I step to the middle of the hall, my mind reeling but we had come here in hopes of catching them. "I don't really know." I want to ask Meliodas himself, to talk to him about all this so I know for sure. It's one of the main reasons I'm hunting him down.

Ban's head tilts, his eyes narrowing. "I was being polite. He pretty much hiccuped his way through telling me, I'm pretty sure, as he was hard to understand, that he killed your sister?" His voice rises at the end and I still.

"No! She lived, she was close but I managed to save her." I rush, as if Ban hearing it that much sooner will help. I don't want him to think such thoughts about Meliodas anyways. "I'm trying to find him, when did you talk to him? Where?" Ban's face eases, his eyes losing a harsh glint and he leans back against his door. He calls over his shoulder, "What was that bar called? Near Danafor."

A moment passes before Elaine, wrapped in a blanket with little bare shoulders poking from the edge comes over as if this is usual. She reaches, gripping my hand in her tiny fist with a careful situating of her coverings before giving a detailed rundown of what Meliodas was doing. "It was two days ago, he can get pretty far if he wants to but with how sloshed he was, it seemed like he would be staying awhile." I thank her, half crying as I give her a hug.

"I'm going to go get him." I rush, turning but only getting two steps before I do an about-face and ask, "and, where is Heavens Theater, just in case this lead doesn't pan out?" Ban straightens, getting even more impossibly tall, his face flushing paler while Elaine's little brows crinkles, looking to her man with confused curiosity. Ban shakes his head no, rubbing at his eyes.

"He'll kill me," he mutters before he stretches his shoulders back as if uncomfortable and he looks to Elaine. "I'll take her for him, but I won't risk you." Ban focuses on me again, "Just us, alright?" Ban is serious and my brows furrow. I'm just about to agree but Elaine elbows him hard in the tummy. "You can just fuck off! I'm going. I can take care of myself and Captain is my friend too you stupid oaf! You can't leave me here!"

"Ugh!" He exhales heavily, "It's a floating stage full of the vilest, roughest-" Elaine's finger points, her eyes narrowing as she all but forces him in the room. "We'll meet you downstairs in an hour," she gruffs to me before the door slams and I wince, looking to Mead's door with apprehension. He's not going to like being left behind either.

I try when he finally and groggily answers the door. After, I pack and go down to the common area, where Mead is already waiting with his things and an aggressive face. He's met Ban before when he found Meliodas for me but he is distrustful. "I got us food," he quips tightly, lips thin and it's then that a burly man bumbles over with cooked oats and fruit when I take my seat beside him. Mead's mad, I know it as we eat in silence but still, I find this loud and sticky place next to an angry friend while eating tasteless food a thousand times better than my empty dining hall.

Well, it's no longer mine. I have nothing.

I frown, wondering if Margaret will have room in the temples for me. I'm sure she will. The rest of my life plan can wait though, as I need to find my ex-fiancé first. The book secured in my bag is giving me so much insight into the things I didn't know and the last few chapters are circling around the author's experience. I nibble as I peek to Mead but he's glaring across the room.

I follow his gaze to find Ban, who is equally miffed, Elaine is smug at his side and they both have bags. "I see you were successful in 'going alone' too." It's not a question and heavy in sarcasm, but I nod to him as he folds his lanky form into the chair across from me. Elaine laughs, waving to the barkeep for two more bowls of what we have. "I don't care if it's dangerous, if Liz goes, I go," the fairy declares.

"I was going to say the same thing," Mead settles, looking just as sure of himself and I frown, suddenly losing my appetite. "How dangerous, though?" I whisper, peering through my lashes for just a moment to catch Ban's severe expression. It must be bad. My worries circle about what Meliodas might be up to there, and how I can convince Mead not to go. I begged him to take me along at the start, so this reversal is strange. "Let's follow up where they saw Meliodas last, then we'll know if Heaven's Theater is even needed." I try to balm over the tension with my words.

The group of us seems to mellow some, Mead and Elaine about coming with us and Ban and I with possibly not needing to go to such a harsh place. Their food comes and we finish together while talking about Ban and Elaine's original plan to hunt down Zeldris and find me. "He was rough, he needed someone with more pull and strength than me to get him out. I had to leave him but I wasn't abandoning him. Not when all the usual things didn't help." I wonder what the usual things are but the conversation evolves with Elaine asking me about what I plan to do when I see him. I don't sugar coat, "I'll punch him in his stupid face," and while she looks shocked, Ban laughs.

They join us on our Manta when we whistle for it to return as they had been traveling by hitchhiking in wagons mostly. We mount and Ban takes the reigns with Elaine curled in his lap. There is less room with four people but I settle back to back with Mead as he nods off on my shoulder and I pull the book out once more as we have another ride before us.

I part the pages, moving the missive acting as my bookmark to the back of the book. After all the dark undertones shining through in the author's warnings I want to know what happened to the couple. Something bad, I gather, but I want the details. It almost feels like the most important part of the story, outside of the notes Meliodas writes but those are important in another way.

I shake my head, beginning from where I left off.

'A world without her is empty of color. I hadn't realized how perfect she was, instead focusing on what I had thought were 'deficiencies'. I had been given a gift, to cherish and cultivate, but in my greed I squandered it. She was all the beauty the world had to offer and I found her lacking in my immaturity. This is my warning to you... without her, I cannot face another day. This book is coming to an end and I can die well knowing I've done all I can to prevent the same curse befalling another. To have your mate die at your own hand... I cannot endure, all the hope in this world has gone with her. The only comfort I have left is the thought that she may be in the next world, waiting for me. My only drive is to see her again.'

The book finishes with recapping the most important parts, ink marks underlining some as if, assumedly, Meliodas found them worthy of extra accentuating. I feel a bit unfulfilled though, as I want the details. This guy's mate died at his hands, presumably because of his instincts, and it must have been really bad with how this guy outlines his mistakes. Everything I've learned recently explains so much but the angry winds in my sails blow ever onward as this book doesn't excuse Meliodas for his personal choices.

I'm not so fragile that I had to be left out of everything! I look around gently so as not to disturb Mead and a yearning returns that I have been trying to ignore and deny. I wish I were traveling with Meliodas. I frown, scowling at the tail of the sky manta. Or, the version of Meliodas that I knew. I hate that I am not sure I know him at all.

Yet, I see the freedom this grants. All signs point to me being his mate. He left his kingdom and title behind and not long after, I had my own. I hated that we were arranged because it was a decision I hadn't made myself, then I hated that it was absolved for the same reasons. Now, we are untethered to our obligations, we could... start over.

Then I look to the novel in my grip. Unless Meliodas thinks there is no chance. Ban said he thinks he killed Veronica, I panicked in the face of him and his power and said some very harsh things that I'm not sure I mean anymore. Some of them I do, he is an idiot, but this isn't unsalvageable. This book is clearly a suicide note by the author and my tummy grips tight as I fear Meliodas might take that route too. Didn't Zeldris even reference it?

"He wouldn't," I whisper to the wind, but I'm so unsure of who or what version of Meliodas I know that I can't even convince myself of its truth. Yet, my feelings towards him are strong. Mostly it's anger, but it's a burning bubble of mad that I'm not able to muster for another. Then my worry, a never-ending crashing of fears that recede and return like waves of lapping, foaming concern. The sorrow, cold and deep, a drop of water on a still mirror of a black lake that ripples so loud it echoes in my hollowness. The depths I'm able to feel means something, I'm sure of it.

I've been a void for so long. Something has broken, a dam and I'm not sure if it was Jelamet's passing or Meliodas' actions. I'm not even sure it matters. These are the pieces of my life and I'll be damned if I don't at least try to fix them. If nothing else comes from this, other than Meliodas knowing I am okay, that my sister is okay and we part ways amicably, than that will be acceptable too.

We travel on and rotate shifts, my hair is a tangled mess until Elaine braids it down my back with a ribbon, where I return the favor. We eat bread and cheese, nap periodically and finally arrive with a very tired beast. The lot of us don't waste time in town, heading for the inn. Ban and Elaine go to the barkeep, seeming to know him, while Mead and I intercept the matron.

She's tallying up for the night, her apron messy and her hair pulled back tight. "One room or two?" She asks, bored but with a flash of a smile. "Two." I reply before I shake my head, "but I want to know about a short blonde man that was here a while ago." Her tallying pauses, her eyes narrowing in suspicion and I look to Mead in fear.

"She's his wife. Skipped out, baby on the way. I think he's just nervous about all the changes." Mead starts and I flinch, my face burning as my mouth opens and closes uselessly. "Said he'd be back weeks ago." Slowly the woman's shoulders ease and she exhales heavily before looking back over her shoulder at the belly heavy Barman talking to our friends.

"I've chased me own down a time or two." She swipes up the coins from the counter and they plop into a sack she stashes under her apron out of sight before turning around. "I'd offer a drink but ye' expecting." The woman pours one for herself as she talks, "Little guy but real strong? Dark eyes?" I nod and she shakes her head like it's a lost cause. "Left two days ago. Drank all his coin away, not 'at I mind tha'." After a long pitying look she turns from me with a frown.

"Know where he's going?" Mead quips, eyeing the bottles behind the woman. He gives me a side-eye but I don't have time to reply as the woman snorts throatily.

"Said 'e needed a beatin', that the drink wasn't workin' no more." I warily look to the back of the Matron's head, "Never thought someone would have a problem drink can't fix." Her shoulders rise and fall, downing the last of her own. It's then that Ban and Elaine join us and Ban takes the lead in arranging our night's stay, claiming being too tired to go on but wanting to ask around town before moving on. I pay for the rooms and the food, after we walk the town, asking after Captain.

We retire for the night after I learn he's been here for over a week, sloshed and sleeping in the streets but always had gold to soothe anyone's gripes about him. As I bathe and dress in my pajamas I grow morose that so many looked so surprised that anyone was looking for him. The baker even condemned him as, "that no good vagrant." Something had happened then, a surge of protectiveness had reared and I'm still a little rattled with my reaction.

Why am I doing this?

He hurt me. More than anyone in my life. He left me at the worst time with Jelamet's passing, which I don't think he knows about and I know he had his reasons for. Mainly my panicked demands of it. Yet, with all my own feelings I find myself worrying about his mental health. To be drunk for days and days in a row. I shiver, thinking again of the author having taken his own life to be with his mate. I have to find him before he gets a stupid notion in his head that dying is a good idea. With a heavy heart, I pull the book out again, just to read the original note he sent along. At the start, he had wanted to talk to me about this.

What changed? How can he go from, 'If you have questions, I'd love to be the one to answer them. We can figure this out together.' to hiding everything, even how he feels? His blank face comes to mind and I scowl as I shove the book in my pack once more. The urge to tear it up is there but I know it's too important, the leather too rich and the pages too thick. Besides, to do such a thing to a book...

A soft knock sounds on my door and I turn, anxious until a slip of parchment slides under my door. I watch as the shadows through the crack above the floor goes and I gather the note. The words send a chill down my spine, but I abide, doing as it asks. I work silently, watching the sliver of a moon move across the sky with my muscles vibrating. When the world is quiet, I creep from my room and slip from the tavern into the cool air of the night. I hike up my sack and move quickly.

He's there, already waiting. In a broad sweep of his arm, he indicates I should hurry and I do. "Hood up!" He whispers rough, "Tuck all the hair back. I need you to be a mystery so as not to draw the eye." I rush to do as he bid, keeping up when he stalks forward, just under a jog. "Gold, 10 pieces." He demands, holding out his palm and I pluck the easiest ones from the inside of my dark cloak. As he asked, half of my coin is in my side pouch ready to be pulled.

In less than fifteen minutes after I passed him what he asked for we dip toward a tavern. We don't go in, instead, we walk along the side until we bend around the back. Another person is there and Ban reaches out, pulling me into his side as if we were a couple. "Cap'n come this way?" He asks and the man in all black looks our way, his shaggy brown curls bounce with the move around his roughed up face. He has a fading purple bruise under his eye. "Ah, must've." Ban laughs when the wounded man scowls.

"Who's this?" He demands. His hand rises to point to me and I try not to tense up as Ban tucks me close, almost shoving my face into his chest. He smells like flowers and I wonder if it's Elaine's scent that clings to him. "No one you need know. We got the toll." He holds out his other palm with the glinting gold in the moonlight. "Both of us." He reiterates and the man scowls, snapping his fingers. The gold vanishes from his hand and I flinch, realizing it was actually us that disappeared. We were in the black void and I'm reminded of being teleported to and from the vampire's territory.

I didn't have time to panic as stone forms underfoot and a crowd is before us. We are in the sky, I can tell from the clouds floating and misting around us. Old statues of goddesses in armor line the edge of the round platform which seems to have broken off from a larger part as the one side is jagged. It's set up like a coliseum, the seats and stairs all leading down to the center stage, which I can hardly make out. "Shite." Ban hisses as it sounds like raw meat slaps rock before a roar of cheers erupts before us.

He takes me by the arm, pulling me through the crowd and down the stairs as a roar sounds, one familiar to me. My heart races anew. "Again!" The voice is gravelly and rough, "Again, quick- before I lose the scent of her." I shiver, goosebumps rising and trailing down my back. He can smell me? I peer round Ban walking before me as we head down the steps, tip-toeing quick and trying to hide under the hood while looking. The beast Meliodas is 'fighting' a small oval headed demon floating with nubbed limbs but he moves lightning fast as he blinks from existence and that slapping of meat sound echoes around until the cheers start.

The nearer we come, the more I can make out. Meliodas is hurt, more than I've ever seen. Shredded flesh and blood around the arena. His clothes are gone, all but the dirty pants now haphazardly torn into shorts. I wince, Ban gripping me tighter as we level out on the platform that spans in a circle around the stage.

"Oi! Oi!" A commanding voice calls out to us, out of breath. "Spectators ain't allowed 'ere, no' unless you got the coin for a go 'round." I turn but Ban spins and steps before me. I feel silly as I inch to look around his side at the round short man with the thin mustache making his demands. "Who's next?" Ban interrupts and the man stands taller, lips thinning and turning white before my friend bends down to clang my pocket pouch of gold before the man's face. "Cause I think it's my friend here next up, we're just making the transition easier by lining up."

How did Ban get that? I didn't even feel him snatch it! I even check my hip and even though I see it before me I'm surprised to find my gold pouch missing from where I last left it.

The man, apparently in charge is quick to scoop up the bag, his other grubby hand rubbing over his lips before he nods. "Yessir, right. You're next. When the bell rings that's a thirty-second warnin'." He points to me before indicating where we need to wait, walking as he talks to himself. "Lots of 'em want a go at Cap'n, they owes 'im the hurts, waitin' another round won't kill 'em." His limp is apparent but the stains down his backside are more so.

"Come on." Ban is more gentle as he touches my back and we go to the broken section of the waist high railing that circles most of the stage. A toothless man guards it and he holds his hand out to stop us as he looks to the round man we paid. He seems to get an affirmative but whatever silent communication they have, I didn't notice it. The bell rings and he snorts. "Which of ya is going in?" He asks and I raise my hand unsure exactly what I plan to do when in there. "No cloaks." The guy backs up and wiggles his rear on the edge of the crumbling stone rail as if letting me pass.

Ban tugs at my bag and I don't fight him, shedding it and then my cloak. The guard whistles low. "Dream on, asshat. She's way out of your league," Ban condemns as whispers start behind me and I barely turn to look over my shoulder to see the spectators and men pointing. It's then that the oval demon finishes, his form gliding our way and Ban pushes me toward the arena. I shake off the sense of danger as I silently descend the few steps to pass the demon who would be the last to rough up Meliodas.

The stage is stained, cracked and I step up to it. I quickly forget about the chaos of people left behind as I focus on the reason I'm here. I finally found him, and he looks horrible. Something soft and warm bubbles in my chest and I feel full inside. He's on his knees, face to the sky and eyes closed. I try to see as I near if he can't open them or if he's refusing to look. He seems almost peaceful, swaying from side to side slightly as if rocking himself and breathing the air in with heavy gasps. He's bleeding from the ear, his skin is riddled with scuffs, wounds, and holes. I'm not sure where to look as there are so many lacerations for me to knit up.

"This is enough," he mutters. I frown, not following and worrying if he has a brain bleed or a severe concussion. With how he looks I wouldn't be surprised. Shouts come from those around us but I don't register what specifically they are upset about as I step ever nearer. I close the gap between us and with him before me, seeming to be waiting with his eyes closed, it reminds me of our first kiss. The side of his face is puffy and I reach out.

Tears prick at my eyes, my hand shakes and my power rises easily. With a gentle caress down the side of his least roughed up cheek I spread healing into him, easing him. His lips part, the cut down his bottom lip sealing mid gasp and as the last of his wounds knit closed he opens his eyes, amazed and in awe. He's okay. I release a heavy breath and the crowd is going crazy with roars of outrage, hollers and howls, deep and vicious.

"Elizabeth?" he whispers, as if he's dreaming. It's then though, as I do another glance over to make sure he's better, his shredded shorts coated in old blood, that I rear back. My anger bubbles forth, joining the warmth in my chest and I slap him as hard as I can across his face. He shifts with the move, head off to the side as I curse with my jolt of pain, "Ouch!" I wince, gripping my palm in my other hand as I shake it and massage it as numbing tingles overcome the shock.

I hiss in a breath, holding my hurt hand to my chest as I glare at Meliodas. "You are an idiot!" I shout, tears trailing down my cheeks and I despise I still can't hold it together long enough to get my point across. "You didn't tell me anything!" I warble, my voice shaking. Slowly his head hangs, knees inching forward and his hands rise as if offering something but I don't understand what. "It would have been so much easier to understand what was happening from my nightmares and I would have handled seeing you in that power vortex much better if I knew beforehand!"

The fingers of his left hand graze along my hurt palm and I let him take it, his hold so delicate my tears rise anew and my chest squeezes tighter. "I feel like you were tricking me! Looking back it was all too good to be true, and I can't believe you kept me in the dark about something so important! That you took away my choices." I choke and his light grip tightens fractionally over my hand as he flips it over to assess the damage. I pull it free and he sags further, almost in a bow, kneeling before me.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, his fist clenched as they tap to the stones under my feet. I snort but the raw feeling roaring in my tummy slows and the warmth pulses to take over and soothe. Angrily I swipe at my tears, my own fists forming and my arms tense down straight by my side, my hurt fist less tense. "You should have talked to me!"

Slowly he looks up, eyes flashing to mine dark and lost. "I was afraid." He speaks precisely and my stomach drops as he's expressive, truly letting me see him and I know this is the first time he's ever let his guard down. Not when he shifted to his demon form nor when we had our rare moments of truly being alone, he's finally himself and I'm shocked I can see myself in his gaze. Tears fill his eyes as I see the depth of the hole inside that my power can't heal, it matched my own and he drops his head as if shamed.

"Look at me," I whisper, shaking in my tension as I realize I usually request the opposite and I know, deep down, this is partly my fault. Maybe even mostly. He does what I request. "We are broken," I tell him, his eyes fathomless and dulling as streams of tears track down his face, shining in the moonlight. I reach, cupping his cheeks to wipe them away as I bend. "But nothing is unmendable," I whisper, pulling his head forward as I drop to my knees to match him all the more.

For a breath, he doesn't respond as I wrap him up, feeling like I'm finally home. I've not had one in many years and the feeling is foreign to me but somehow I've missed it. I hear his deep inhale, sniffing me as his nose wiggles deeper into my neck as he finally moves and more tears pinch out as my eyes squeeze closed. "So, I'm really yours?" I ask, barely above a whisper and his arms circle my waist, trapping me in the best way, as I feel safe.

"I tried... but you've never been mine," he croaks, his arms locking tighter as if he won't let me go. I relax against him, my own arms clutching tighter as I try to process this. It conflicts with everything I've heard and read. I thought I was his mate! "But I've been yours for years and years." A sob bubbles and bursts from between my lips as I nuzzle into his hair, his hand rubbing my back in comfort as I fist his hair to keep us together. "I killed your sister. How can you stand the sight of me, let alone gift me with any affection."

With many sniffles, I lean away, my head already shaking in denial. "I saved her," I tell him and he tenses, eyes stark as they look into mine mere inches away, he retorts. "But I watched the funeral pyres. I couldn't leave you without seeing you home safe and within the day the castle dropped its flags and..." My eyes fill and he stops as my sorrow bubbles once more and he knows. I can see when his mind makes the connection and I crumple, breaking while finally feeling my loss, feeling that I can with his arms here to hold me together. "Oh, Elizabeth," he grouses and I shake as I bury closer into him.

"I gave up my title," I warble, "I can't go back there. I want my own life." I cling as he shifts me to the side and I feel a whoosh of wind where I was seconds ago. "My father allowed me a sky manta and I took Mead in my search for you." His arm scoops me closer as he stands, his other falling away but I'm tucked close, talking into his hair. "Gelda visited, she told me about us and Zeldris followed. He has all Mead's siblings. I'm pretty sure they are moving to the Demon kingdom. A family of goddesses migrating!" I shiver as something cold splatters up my leg and his chest rumbles before Meliodas bounds up at top speed. I cling for a completely different reason as he dips and dodges, climbing the stands in a jolt with me in his arms, before jumping off the edge of the floating stage in the few seconds it took to reach it.

I only catch glimpses of angry faces, statues and blurring movements as he manhandles me. "Ban!" I shout, realizing too late just how upset I made everyone when stopping Meliodas' beating. No wonder Ban didn't want Elaine to come, especially if he had any inkling of what was happening here. Meliodas' wings sprout, his other arm securing me as he flies.

"He's out," Meliodas tells me, and I trust him, tucking closer as the air is cooler. I don't bother with my own wings as I continue my tale after telling Meliodas where I'm staying. "Father is furious with me, but I had to find you, I read that book and I realized so many things!" Then a spark of anger flares as he shifts our direction and I smack at his back with my sore hand. "You don't like tea!" He chuckles, reluctantly but I curl back up around him. "I think that book is mostly stupid!"' I declare. "If I had known I would have warmed much quicker!" His head shakes as if I'm silly and his speed kicks up, the air colder and louder so I refrain from talking but I kiss the side of his head and his chest rumbles softly while his head tilts nearer to my own.

Ban's already in front of our inn when we arrive and he hands over my cloak and bag. Meliodas doesn't let our bodies part as I grab my cloak and he takes my pack. "Close one, eh?" Ban chuckles, looking back over his shoulder. "I got a fifty percent chance of Elaine having not noticed. Wish me luck." He winks as he turns in, the door creaking as he dips into the tavern.

I lead Meliodas to my room and for the first time, I understand what Gelda must have been complaining about as he still refuses to part his skin from mine even when maneuvering the thin stairs. It's only a moment before we are silently in my paid-for room. "Are you tired?" I ask, knowing he must be and he stares into me before I flush looking at the single twin bed in the tiny room. "We only have one blanket this time." He nods, dropping his touch and my bag before stepping back as if understanding, but he doesn't. "No," I close the gap between us, grabbing his bicep. "We can share it. Let me see if I have anything that will fit you."

He's easy to guide as I move him to have a seat on the bed and I smile to him as I start digging into my sack while dropping my cloak beside it. "You are too good, Elizabeth," he whispers. "I wish I could fix the world for you." I pause, shaking my head as I look to him with a confused grin but his face is bleak. "I wish I were good enough." A hushed quiet surrounds us as I pull out a pair of pants with a drawstring at the waist. I offer it to him and he stands, turning his back to me while removing his blood-stained shreds of fabric still clinging around his waist. I spin, a little too late as I do spot the muscled indents in his rear before I grant him his privacy.

"I think you are. Well, I'd like to get to know you, to start over," I whisper to the shadowed, cobwebbed corner of this worn room. "We can start fresh, I'm free now. I can stay with Margaret at the temple, we can date for real, ignore all the obligations with none linking to me anymore." My mind whirls with adventure and possibilities. "I want to stand on a mountain top and learn how to cook." My hands fold into themselves over my chest. "To see the dancing northern lights and-" I flinch when he touches my shoulder and I turn to him.

Is he taller? He looks taller. I smile, leading him to the bed and I don't hesitate to climb in first and take the spot against the wall. I snuggle down into the blankets and roll over to face him. "I... am still having a hard time believing you are here. That you want me here. I thought I lost everything." I reach for him and it's like he can't resist, doesn't even try as he falls into bed, tucking himself under the covers with me. Any part of him that can, lines up and touches all the parts of me. It's warm and cozy, I wiggle my face closer and loop my arm around his torso.

Shyly, remembering the last time I did this, I dip forward and smell him. He's lovely, and something settles inside, a locking in place, although tears rise and prick at the edges of me. When he snuggles closer I know it's going to be okay. "I'm sorry," he whispers, then he tells me again, breathing me in with an open mouth to the side of my jaw to repeat his apology over and over. "I thought if I could win you the regular way, if I knew you loved me, I thought it would go smoother. I wanted you to want me of your own volition but with how we were arranged, I should have known." He sighs, "I am an idiot."

"No argument here," I joke softly and I like that his chest bounces just enough for me to detect his light, silent laughter. We absorb one another's warmth and I figure he's sleeping with his steady breathing and stillness. Until he hushes across the silences once more, "I'd like a fresh start," he admits. "No forced marriage, just getting to know one another. You can stay wherever you want, but know the Demon Kingdom will be open to you. I'll have a whole wing for you. Fill it with whatever you want."

I shake my head, denying and he nods, accepting it. "Yeah, it's too soon to live together, whatever you'll allow I'll-" I interrupt with, "Just a room, for when I stay with you. I'll share your wing. I don't want to be alone anymore." I admit and he stops moving, "Yeah," he croaks roughly, "okay."

The sun starts to rise and I watch the light slowly start to glow into my room. "Just, one thing," I amend and he tilts his head back to see me. Our eyes meet, barely glinting in the dark but finally open as neither of us are guarded, no more walls between us. "No more lies, not even by omission. Okay?" I whisper and he agrees so fast I smile, it stays as I dip forward to brush my lips to his.

He holds me to him, bending over me as he refuses to part our lips and Meliodas kisses me back, stealing all the air from my lungs and sealing our deal. I'm warm and safe and for the first time the world is at my fingertips, the options before me seemingly limitless. It's then though, that I realize just what kind of power I wield with Meliodas as my mate. What he would do for me if I asked and although daunting, I wonder if that's what Jelamet was truly preparing me for. She did always say I'd shape nations.

"Hm," I hum, pulling Meliodas over my head all the more to make our kiss last seconds longer. "I think I can get used to this," I promise, eyes half-lidded as I look up at him. Even with my fear and all that is before us, "The happiness far outweighs the bad. Doesn't it?" His smile is easy, watery, his green eyes shining with unshed tears as he agrees. His tears fall to my cheeks as he doesn't part from me as he cries. Meliodas nods, his shoulders shaking and chest tense, "Yeah." He breathes across my lips, having a hard time keeping his voice normal. He captures my lips with tenderness, telling me his feelings in a new way. I try to do the same and hope he can feel it as we communicate with our kiss.

Fin (for now)