The Quimby Files

by slapstick.genius

Diamond Joe Quimby's family album does not include the North Carolina drawings, which are in the Springfield museum. But it does include a history of gore, crime and a strange relationship with The Burnses and The Quartermaines of GH fame.

9. Reginald and his changelings

As a child after his dad left his life, Reginald became a mail boy with the help of his mother. A streetwise kid, he escaped the wrath of the corrupt police for years and years until he grew out of his mail boy job.

When he grew older, Leslie exercised and also aged gracefully due to a good diet. But a tumultuous relationship with her partner Alec Mersin led to her murder by his estranged childhood friend Marc Burns - the much older half brother of Clifford Burns - in the house. Expressing disgust, Reginald escaped the whole house and left it behind for work at the Burns Mansion. As a minion of the ever dramatic Wainwright Montgomery Burns, he interestingly bought the throne and the desk as a gift for his master, thus he began a bank savvy tradition.

He married Phoenix McCall and had Clifford Junior, Dominique, and Ernest as adopted children, because their birth parents were rather caring if rather dysfunctional drunkards, who in turn adopted the former's own estranged children (Sarah, George and Archibald) themselves.

Seemingly strange indeed, although that scenario actually worked! The changelings went under the Quimby influence, whereas their rivals went under that of the Burnses.

Post-changeling scenario, Reggie died of MRSA in 1951.