Chapter 11

***Summer 1996***

"Liv?" Stephen thought he heard noises just after midnight. He wondered who it could be. Huck and Harrison had gone out; Huck on a business trip, and Harrison on a weekend away with his girlfriend. It was technically just him and Olivia staying at the apartment. Things had been pretty awkward between them ever since he confessed his feelings to her only to be rejected. She spent most of her time with "Gatsby Jr." and whenever they were in the apartment together, they were never in the same room for more than thirty seconds before one of them would find some type of excuse to leave the area. All in all he missed his friend though, and was worried when she didn't come back by ten, but figured it was because she was spending the night at Gatsby Jr.'s place.

He stepped out of his bedroom and out into the hallway. He heard low whimpers and sniffling as he came near the living room.

"Liv?" he repeated, "Liv, hey what's wrong?"

Stephen immediately rushed to her side upon seeing her curled up in a ball under a blanket on the couch. He sat down and immediately hugged her tight.

"Liv, it's ok. You're ok. You can talk to me," he spoke in a soothing voice. "I know things haven't been well with us, but I'm sorry for being petty. If this is about me, I'm so sorry, Liv."

Olivia raised her head from the blanket and sniffled lightly.

"No Stephen, you were right. You were right this whole time about the guys I was seeing. I-I should have listened," she whimpered.

Stephen tucked his finger under her chin and lifted her head up. He could see the heartbreak in her eyes, and at that moment he vowed he would find that he would find the men responsible for breaking Olivia's heart, and make them pay for the pain they caused her.

"Listen to me Liv, men are trash!" He put it bluntly, making Olivia laugh.

"You're not."

"I like to think of myself as compost," he grinned, getting another laugh out of her. "You don't have to talk about him if you're not ready to, but I'll be here for you when you do." He rubbed his hand up and down her arm in a comforting matter, and lightly kissed her on the head. Nothing more than a friendly peck in his mind. He stood up from the couch.

"Stephen wait!" Olivia called out, "don't leave me alone, please?" she begged. Her voice was so broken and wavered with sadness.

Stephen sat back down and cuddled next to Olivia. What else could he do?

"I thought I loved him," Olivia uttered, "he made me feel special."

"You are special! You're brilliant, you're funny, you're wickedly smart, and albeit sexy as hell. If he can't see that, then this dude is blind." Stephen was worried he may have gone too far after she told him she didn't see him in a romantic light, but he needed to be honest with her. He saw all of that within Olivia and more.

"You really see all of that?" Olivia looked up at Stephen with pleading eyes.

"I really do…" Stephen trailed, glaring at Olivia. Despite looking so sad, she was still so beautiful. Stephen knew that he shouldn't try to make any moves. She was in a fragile state, but he wanted to make sure she felt better at the same time, and damn it he always wanted her from the moment he laid eyes on her.

Before Stephen could stop himself, he felt himself leaning in, lightly bushing his lips against hers. She didn't pull away, and he continued sliding his tongue into her mouth, as the kiss grew deep and passionate. He knew he should have stopped, she was upset and vulnerable, but then as he was about to puller away and apologize he felt her hands wrap around the nape of his neck, pulling him in closer.

Olivia continued making out with Stephen, trying to forget all the memories from the past couple of hours. She pulled out of his kiss and gripped the collar of his shirt.

"Liv?" Stephen asked, afraid he had gone too far.

"Take me to bed, Stephen."

Olivia woke up before the sun even started to rise. She turned over and saw the clock informing her that it was just after five in the morning. Olivia looked around and realized she wasn't in her room. She sat up and turned to her side, and saw Stephen sleeping soundly next to her. She gasped as the memories of the night came flooding back to her. Her meeting Mellie, Fitz breaking up with her, him choosing his career over her, her sleeping with Stephen in a desperate attempt to forget about the benefit dinner. Olivia got up out of the bed and heard Stephen moan and stir in his sleep. He ruffled around, saying something incoherent before passing out once again.

Olivia looked around. How could she have done this? Stephen was a standup guy, and her only friend in LA, and now she had just totally foiled their relationship. Olivia bushed her hands through her hair, trying to think of what to do. She didn't want to stay in this apartment, there were too many memories now all painful. She didn't even want to begin to think about the complicated roommate dynamics that would arise after her impulsive decision she made out of emotional distress. The more she thought about it the more she realized she didn't want to stay in LA, not if Fitz was going to be their elected representative. And if he was eventually going to be governor, she didn't want to stay in California for that matter either. Olivia left Stephen's bedroom and paced circles in the living room.

Of course if Big Gerry's plan was completely successful, which given the Grant family history in politics, it would be successful, she would see Fitz everyday on TV as Governor and then President. The thought of her having to see him on a daily basis even through TV broke her. How far would she have to go to get away from Fitz? She noticed her empty suitcase in the corner of the room. The only piece of luggage she had brought with her from DC to LA. Only a couple of months ago, on a whim of spontaneity she uprooted her whole life and moved to LA without a single idea of what to expect, surely she could do it again if she wanted to.

Olivia quietly wheeled her suitcase into her bedroom and began packing her stuff up. Once completed, she went to the front door and dropped her stuff off there. She snuck into Stephen's room one last time and lightly kissed his cheek.

"Thank you, Stephen," she whispered. She heard him mumble something before rolling over once again. With her single suitcase behind her, Olivia quietly slipped out into the night.

***Summer 2019***

Olivia shot awake at the memory of her move to Zanzibar. She frequently had dreams about her breakup with Fitz when she first moved here, but she hadn't had any in years until last night. She figured she had her daughter who invited him to the resort to thank for that strange reoccurrence.

Speaking of her daughter, she had to wake her daughter up. Her wedding was tomorrow, and she could hardly believe that this was her last day with her little girl. Olivia stretched out of bed and got ready for her day. She approached her daughter's cottage, knocking lightly.

"Raya, dear?" she called after a few seconds of no response. Olivia tried again a little louder to no avail. After the third time, Olivia opened the door and walked into her daughter's completely empty and neat room. Olivia looked at her perfectly made bed peculiarly. It was awfully early for her to begin her day. Where was she?

"So you've never been to the United States?" Fitz asked as he and Raya walked along the trails.

"Nope. Mom and I go on vacations about once a year or so, but usually it's to places in Europe. We went to Japan though once!" Raya explained excitedly. Fitz frowned hearing that Olivia hadn't even been back to the US to visit. He hoped he hadn't ruined her that much.

"I don't think it was because of what happened between you two," Raya said, noticing his slumping posture. "She just didn't really have a reason to go back. Other than Abby who comes here to visit, she doesn't have anyone in America. She doesn't talk much about her father, and I had no interest in really meeting him so…"

Fitz chuckled slightly to himself, "yeah, troubling fathers is something that we were able to bond over…"

"What's your father like?"

Fitz stopped in the middle of the trail, hearing Raya's question.

"Oh I'm sorry, is he no longer alive?" Raya said apologetically. Fitz continued walking, he did say he would answer any of the questions she had for him.

"No he's still alive…to the best of my knowledge. I haven't seen him in about two and a half years though, not since my mom passed…but he was a pretty controlling guy to say the least."

"Did my mom meet him?"

"They met a couple of times, they didn't get along all too well." Fitz put it as politely as he could. "It was his idea for me to go into politics with an endgame of becoming President," he continued.

"He was upset when you dropped?"

"Yeah," Fitz nodded, recalling the screaming fit he endured after he told his dad he was dropping so he could spend the final couple of months taking care of his mom.

"Are you upset that you dropped? Do you regret it?" The two were turning back into the resort.

"No, if anything I regret ever running and going into politics in the first place," Fitz let out a heavy sigh.

Fitz and Raya continued walking the main path of the resort, when they overheard Stephen and Abby nearby on the resort's tennis courts.

"Hey Raya, Fitz! How about a little doubles?" Stephen yelled out holding up his racket. Fitz looked at Raya with a raised eyebrow to let her know the decision was all hers.

"We probably should," she talked lowly, "to get them to be on a team together and closer. It'd be good of us, right?" she said referring to Stephen and Abby's continuing closeness.

"Definitely," Fitz nodded.

"Sure we'll be right there!" Raya called out, and they jogged toward the court.

"Alright, doubles. Fitz and I vs. you and Abby?" Raya suggested to a very appreciative Stephen.

"Sounds good to me, although I warn you I'm a little bit of a professional," Abby teased.

"Oh really?" Stephen scoffed.

"Yes really!" Abby retorted. "I played throughout college, you can ask Liv about it."

The teams sorted themselves on the court with Abby and Raya both taking the back of their respective sides and Fitz and Stephen taking the front. They played for a solid half hour, and Abby was not kidding when she talked about being a professional. She had them whipped after a half hour of playtime. They took all took a pause to catch their breath and grab some water, when Abby overheard Fitz talking to Raya on the other side of the court.

"If you don't mind, after this if you could help me talk to your mom…"

Abby's eyes narrowed. She couldn't believe Fitz would still have the courage to try to talk to Olivia after the stunt he pulled. Olivia had made it pretty clear since he first arrived that she wanted nothing to do with him. And Abby couldn't blame her. He hadn't seen her those first few weeks after he broke her heart. He didn't receive ongoing calls from a balling Olivia at four in the morning for weeks in a row. He didn't drop everything to fly out to Zanzibar and help her move on from her heartache, staying there for nine whole months to help her through one of the hardest times of her life . He wasn't there when she was. He had no idea the damage he did to her, and seeing him now, all smiling and giddy towards Olivia's daughter, trying to use her to get to Olivia made her sick.

"How about another round?" Stephen suggested. The group agreed and took back to their positions.

Abby took a deep breath, preparing her serve; using all of her concentration and force she could gather and struck the ball powerfully with practically perfect aim. Before Fitz could even react to the fast ball coming his way he felt it collide with his chest and hollered out in pain, falling to his knees.

"Fitz?!" Raya cried, running over.

"Are you alright, mate?" Stephen sprinted to the other side of the court to Fitz who was doubled-over in pain.

"I-I'm fine," Fitz wheezed, though his chest was throbbing.

Raya and Stephen helped Fitz get up.

"Sorry," Abby said somewhat sincerely, regretting how hard she had hit the ball. She didn't mean for it to be so forceful, but anger had gotten the best of her. Fitz glared back at her as he continued to hunch over and hold his chest.

"It's good," he muttered, trying to mask the pain with little success.

"Here, I can take him to the clinic," Raya offered to Stephen and Abby. Raya walked Fitz to the clinic and got him to lie on the examination table. "I'll be right back," she insisted before walking out. All Fitz could do was grunt in acknowledgement and stare up at the ceiling of the room for several minutes.

"Now, what happened?" he could recognize that voice anywhere, though she sounded slightly annoyed in tone, he still found it to be beautiful. He weakly lifted his head enough to see her.

"Your friend broke my chest with a tennis ball!" He complained whimisically.

"She did not break your chest…" she said annoyed. She approached him and helped him take off his shirt. When her daughter ran up to her and told her Fitz got hurt, she was ashamed to admit just how much fear rushed through her initially. She knew it was nothing serious after she heard the story, and scolded herself for how worried she became. She didn't care about Fitz. Why would she? He was a part of her broken and forgotten past. She hardly thought about him until he showed up, and honestly she didn't even find herself attracted him anymore, demonstrating how much progress she was able to make in the past 23 years. Even though she told herself all of that, she couldn't bite back the gasp she made once his shirt was off, seeing his body up close.

"Is it bad?" Fitz cringed, hearing and misunderstanding the reasoning behind Olivia's gasp.

"Uh…no…no…it's not that bad." Olivia put her hand against him. She could clearly see the red mark where the ball had hit on his left pec. She felt around the area to make sure nothing was broken.

"Ah! Ah! Careful!" Fitz grimaced. Olivia touching him was exactly what he wished for yesterday when he oversaw her with Jake. Normally he would have been ecstatic to have her hands on him, if only he wasn't in pain. "I think my ribs are broken." Fitz winced as she passed over them.

"Oh relax, you big baby. Nothing's broken. It's just a bruised pectoral muscle," she noted, feeling the tender area. Fitz slightly winced but became relaxed under her touch. "I'll go get you some ice."

No more than two minutes later Olivia returned with an icepack and a cloth for him. Fitz lied down, putting the ice against his forming bruise and sighing at the instant numbing relief it brought.

"You know, this bed is pretty comfy. Could I stay here instead of that doghouse?"

"First of all, no this is a clinic, and we need it to stay as a clinic, not your personal room. And second of all, it's not a doghouse, it's an old boatshed."

"It's pretty much a doghouse. It's about as big as one, and smells like it too," Fitz noted.

"You chose to stay there!" Olivia pointed out, getting annoyed. "If you didn't want to sleep on a hard floor you could have-"

"Oh no Livvie," Fitz interrupted. "It's not sleeping on the floor that has got me. Some of my best memories are from hard floors," he looked up smirking at her. Olivia blushed giggling to herself, recalling their night on his family's kitchen floor. Why did she let him see her laugh at his comments? This was what she was worried about: Fitz going back to his charming old self, the man that took her to the planetarium and kissed her under a thousand shooting stars.

"I'm just saying, it would be nice if I didn't have to walk a quarter mile anytime I have to go to the bathroom," Fitz finished his statement, bringing Olivia out of her thought.

"Yeah, well there are a lot of other resorts in the area. If you want to change and check out I can call – "

"Do you want me to check out?"

"What?" Olivia asked.

"Do you want me to check out?" Fitz repeated. "Do you want me to leave, not leave you alone, but actually leave?"

"Fitz, listen, whatever hotel you stay at, it's your decision. I don't really care."

"But you do care. You want to know what I think?"

"I really don't want to know what you think…" Olivia said, but Fitz continued anyways. He was feeling far more confident to address Olivia after the talk he had with her daughter the night before that gave him hope.

"I think you don't want me to leave. That no matter how hard you are actually trying to ignore them, you still have some feelings for me. And that's ok, Livvie, I have them too; I never stopped having them. I think you're afraid to act and pursue something, because you don't trust me, so you put up this toughness act to cover it. But Livvie, whatever happened in the past is over. It can be you and me now, the way it was always supposed to be." He looked up at her smiling wide as brightly as he could.

Olivia furrowed her brow. Who did Fitz think he was telling her what she should or shouldn't be feeling, telling her what she should and shouldn't be forgetting, telling her what it was that was meant to be? She was tired of dealing with his arrogant attitude, thinking that he could woo her once again after ripping her heart to shreds just because some time has passed.

"You want to know what I think?" Olivia stood up from her chair. "I think that you're lonely and horny, so you came here to get your way, because you're so used to always getting your way. I think that you came here with some kind of white knight complex that you can save me from this resort and bring me back to America like it's some sort of mission, because you can't seem to accept the fact that I'm happy here to be single and free-"

"Olivia, that's not why-"

"I'm not done yet!" she spoke up. "I think that you assume since you finally told your daddy off twenty years too late that I would just come running back to you, like nothing from the past mattered."

"I didn't mean-"

"Listen!" Olivia raised her voice. "I think that I was right from the start when I first met you and figured you were one of those privileged, wealthy boys, born to public figures with no backbone, let alone a sense of self."

Olivia glanced down at Fitz's swollen and bruised hand, and picked it up from the table roughly, making him cringe.

"And I think you're the reason why I found a hole in one of my supply closets this morning."

"I'm sorry about the wall," he said, rubbing his hand once Olivia let go, "I'll fix that, I promise. But the rest is… well, Olivia you were right. I messed up all those years ago, and you are exactly right on the person I was: wealthy, privileged, no sense of self. But I've changed Olivia. I've changed a lot in the past couple of years, and I'm still trying to. I'm trying to be a better person. If you gave me a chance, I can show you."

"You had 23 years to show me. This resort is all over travel sites online, if you wanted to find me you could have." Olivia had released a hint of her deepest secret, that for years she hoped to no avail that he would come to her, but on his own merits, not being tricked into getting invited. And with that Olivia stormed out of the room.

Later that evening Olivia found herself pacing back and forth in her office, as she past her laptop multiple times. She told herself she would never do it. She hadn't done it since he dropped out of the 2016 Presidential race, and she was proud that she never did. There was never a reason to after that. He pretty much disappeared from the public spotlight from what she heard from around. She knew it would be a slippery slope if she started. Eventually she gave in, cursing herself for doing it as she opened up her web browser and searched "Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III."

She scrolled through the articles, unsure of what he had been up to since 2016. She clicked on his Wikipedia page to read through it, feeling ashamed of herself for Internet stalking ex-boyfriends.

She noticed a tab on his page that she didn't notice before when she had searched him in the past, "activism." Olivia clicked on the arrow tab of the page to read more. She began reading the paragraph. Apparently he had started an organization called Music Makes a Difference in 2017, a year after he retired from political life. Olivia hovered over the link attached to the organization and clicked on it to read what it was about.

"Music Makes a Difference is a non-profit charity that provides music education to public schools in underprivileged areas throughout the United States."

Olivia stopped to breathe after reading just the first sentence. She went back to his page and read more about his activism, receiving only a summary of everything he had been up to. Since retiring from the political world, Fitz had gotten involved a number of organizations including the Innocence Project and the #MeTooMovement. Olivia found herself going down a rabbit's hole as she read article after article about Fitz's recent involvement in fighting climate change, his efforts to raise money for those affected by the mudslide in Brazil, providing aide to Puerto Ricco after their devastating earthquake.

She remembered many years ago on their first date when she had asked him what he wanted to do, and he responded that he wanted to make a difference. At the time he said that politics was best way to do so, though she knew there were other routes. It was clear to Olivia now, that he found a route that suits him, and finally was making a difference like he had always wanted.

"Hi thanks for meeting me here," Raya said, standing outside in their traditional meeting spot.

"Of course, but isn't it bad luck to see the bride the night before the wedding?" Zeke smiled at her.

"I'm willing to risk it, as long as we can take a few minutes to talk," she offered.

"I'm game," Zeke said, sitting down. Raya took a deep breath in, and went into the speech she had thought through all day.

"You were right. I haven't been communicating with you, and I haven't gotten you involved in the wedding, and I've been treating this like it's my own wedding, when it's ours. And I'm sorry. I know that as a married couple, we're going to have our ups and downs, which is why I think it's important we start to have these conversations now. I am going to try to be better, Zeke. I'll learn to communicate more and include you, but you'll just have to be patient with me while I try to figure it out. Relationships don't come easy. And growing up, I never really had one that I could look at for guidance."

Zeke warmly smiled at Raya and embraced her tightly.

"Raya, it is our wedding, but that also means that our families are coming together. So your dad…or dads," he corrected slightly awkwardly, "…aren't just yours, but they'll also be mine. And I want them there. I want them there for that; they deserve to be there for that. I know I can be rash and overreact at times, but I'll be working on that too. What I said yesterday, I didn't mean. I think we were already meant to be married yesterday," he said leaning into a kiss.

"I'm sorry babe, do you forgive me?" he asked.

"Last night I got some great advice that if someone love you enough, they'll forgive you, and I love you Ezekiel," Raya said softly.

"I love you too, Raya."