9:29 Haring 15th
The preparations have begun. Eren had to give the second in command the position of Captain, for now. Bryce and Fergus were going to go join the war front against the darkspawn. The first skirmish already happened and the King won that one. From what I remember, there were three attacks before the main horde came and killed the remaining forces. We were doing all we could to train them. Some guards already had experience, while others were fresh new recruits.
It was odd seeing these men that were most likely going to get killed by darkspawn. There was a knot in my stomach, one of guilt. I knew that I couldn't do anything because I was only one person but that didn't mean it didn't kill me inside. I knew what was going to happen…and I won't be able to stop it.
Eren and I were busy making preparations and helping Bryce with supplies to send with their force. We had to gather everything before the first snow came. The chill was there but no clouds in the sky meant no snow. Bryce has also been in contact with Howe on a regular basis…and he was coming in a week and a half.
Every night, since Eren told me about the darkspawn, I retraced my steps from the larder and to the city. I checked my pack to make sure I had everything there as well as the coin from my pouch. I tested out every possibility. Howe's soldiers would attack on all fronts and Howe was going to be with Bryce on that night too.
If I played my cards right, I should be able to save everyone. Of course I should also be ready for the possibility of something happening. The worst case scenario that I won't be able to save anyone. That's why I've been putting my heart in training, asking to even fight against the soldiers. I made sure to face against two or three. Howe's men won't do the one on one, they'll rush me. I have to keep fighting. I have to get better or more people will die.
I'm here now. Maybe in a grand scale I can't make a difference but I can make a difference in a few people's lives right? That's the only thing that's feeding my guilty conscience. I have to listen to it. Otherwise, I'd be crushed by my emotional weight.
9:30 Wintermarch 3rd
My hands are weak. My letters are so…Rael would beat me up for this I'm sure. God, I'm so tired. Eren and Oren are…I'm the worst. I couldn't even…Well, there's no point in being so vague. I have to write it down. I have to! I have to…I have to…otherwise I'd be useless. I'll beat myself later.
It happened. Howe attacked and Duncan…was nowhere to be found.
I was there when Bryce called Eren in. They have been planning to, of course, march together. Howe explained how his soldiers were delayed.
"I have heard much of your work with the soldiers. Well done." Howe smirked and shook Eren's hand. My blood boiled when I saw him and I kept my hands at my back. I thought about it. One of the possibilities to stop all this was to murder Howe but how? He was always with Bryce when he came. They were never separated. I didn't have a chance.
"I'm guessing your family didn't come with you?" Eren wondered.
"Oh no." Howe chuckled. "They are in our lands in Amaranthine, well away from the fighting. Truthfully, my daughter Delilah has asked for you."
"You know my son's response from the last time you insinuated that." Bryce chuckled and patted Eren's shoulder. Howe did a quick hateful glace at me before smiling at them.
"Yes I do recall but you must consider, my boy, that age has no play later on." Howe chuckled.
"I must decline." Eren said politely.
"At any rate, there is a reason why I called you pup. You will be in charge in the castle while your brother and I are away." Bryce gripped Eren's shoulder. I could see Eren soar from the responsibility that his father gave him.
"I will do my best father." Eren said with pride.
"Thank you pup." Bryce gave a smile of relief. "Only a few of our forces will stay once our main army is gone. I trust that you will keep the peace in the region while I'm gone."
"Of course father. I will do my best to protect Highever." Eren nodded.
"That's my boy." Bryce said proudly. It wrenched my heart. "Now that I have given you your responsibilities, go and see your brother. He will be leaving soon and you don't want to miss the opportunity to say farewell." Bryce explained.
"It was a pleasure meeting you again." Howe shook his hands with Eren. I bit my cheek to stop myself from clenching my hands around Howe's throat. I am a pacifist but Howe has my hate. He's the only one I can kill with no hesitation and no regret. We left the main hall and Eren breathed in deep when we got out.
"I am in charge…" He said breathlessly.
"People better start praying…" I mumbled. Eren glared and flicked my forehead. "Ow! I was kidding!"
"Of course you were." Eren rolled his eyes. "Come, let's say our farewells to my brother. I won't see him again for many months." Eren chuckled. More than you think, I thought somberly. "Don't worry, he'll be back before you know it." Eren reassured me after seeing my face. I nodded. Fergus yes but everyone else…
"Ah there you are milord, Nia." Ser Gilmore rounded the corner and nodded to both of us.
"Ser Gilmore, it has been a while. I'm surprised you're not with father's troops." Eren crossed his arms. Gilmore laughed sheepishly.
"No, I offered to stay. You need some good muscle here, besides yourself and Nia of course." Gilmore added. He was such a sweet guy but had nearly no eyebrows. It always bugged me.
"Thank you for that but you're not here only to make compliments I'm sure?" Eren asked.
"Oh! No. It seems your hound has entered the larder again. Nan has threatened to quit as well as other unmentionable threats." Gilmore chuckled.
"She always does." Eren sighed and laughed. "Alright, Gilmore come with me to take that blasted intelligent beast away from Nan. Nia, go and say goodbye to my brother. I'll meet you there." Eren nodded while he led the way to the larder. At this point I really wanted to see if I could corner Howe alone. I sneaked back to the hall but they were both chatting like old friends. There wasn't anything I could do.
I took Eren's advice and walked toward their room. Eleanor had visitors and I politely excused myself through them. There was no point in learning about more shadows that will plague me. I'm sorry but I wasn't able to save you. They're rooms could become defensive but that's the weak point too. Only one way to get in, one way to get out. I looked at the bookcases surrounding the entrance door and the chests. It'll be loud but I might be able to move them and cover the door while I save Bryce. It was worth a shot in my mind.
"Why do you have to go papa?" Oren's voice echoed as I walked toward the open bedroom. I clenched my fist as my stomach twisted again. I took a deep breath and entered.
"So I can defeat all the darkspawn and come back a hero Oren." Fergus laughed and ruffled his son's hair. Oren pouted before he saw me.
"Nia!" He ran to me and I lifted him up.
"Well look at you! I think he grew another inch while I was gone." I chuckled. Fergus and Oriana laughed before I handed Oren back to Fergus.
"It's good to see you before I leave Nia." Fergus shook my hand after putting Oren down.
"And you as well my lord." I bowed slightly. Then he pulled me into a really big hug.
"Come now! There's no need for such formality! You are nearly my sister-in-law!" Fergus laughed. I gave him a dead panned look when I pulled away.
"Me marry Eren? Yeah right." I rolled my eyes. Oriana giggled.
"You would not find a better man than him." Oriana winked suggestively.
"I'll pass. To think I'll be here alone with him, ugh, I can already feel my sanity slipping." I shivered. "Don't be gone too long Fergus." I smiled.
"I'll try not to." Fergus chuckled. "We already have a few Grey Wardens at Ostagar. Once we have defeated the enemy, I'll march right back here."
"I can't shake off my worry though." Oriana sighed.
"Papa can you bring me back a sward?" Oren asked. We all laughed.
"That's sword Oren and I'll bring you back the mightiest one I can find." Fergus crouched and hugged his son.
"Already exchanging the good-byes? Without me? I am so horribly hurt." Eren came waltzing in. Fergus put him in a small chokehold and ruffled his hair.
"I know you'll miss me dearly brother!" Fergus laughed. Eren got out of his grasp and punched Fergus in the arm.
"Of course not, without you here, I can finally reign. Be afraid brother, I might replace you." Eren threatened jokingly.
"Sure, sure. Try not to let the power get to his head for me?" Fergus asked. I nodded. I noticed that Oriana's eyes already began watering. "Don't cry for me my love. It's better that I be in your prayers." Fergus said softly.
"Should I leave you two to finish then?" Eren suggested. Fergus laughed.
"I'm very sure you already understand brother what it means to have a special woman in your life." Fergus hugged Oriana. Eren scoffed.
"Yes, very special." Eren said sarcastically. "Well not only was I sent here to say goodbye but father wanted you to continue on without him." Eren explained. Fergus clicked his tongue.
"Then the Arl's men are delayed. You would think they were all walking backwards. Well, I might as well start marching. Maker forbid, that I get there and all the darkspawn have been killed." Fergus chuckled.
"I hope that doesn't mean you won't be saying good-bye to your parents." Bryce and Eleanor walked in. I looked at Eren and he nodded. I came out of the room and tried not to listen in on the touching scene. It would only break my heart more.
Now that Bryce was in the room, I searched high and low for Howe. It wasn't until that another soldier came by and said that he was off in the city. I cursed silently to myself. I couldn't catch him. Instead I went back to plan A: get a carriage. I got my pack and walked toward the city. I went toward the stables and asked for someone to stay outside the city near the woods. It took 4 sovs, really expensive, but I was able to convince them that it was the order of the Teyrn. It was already turning dusk by the time I came back to the castle.
I went back and saw the marching of the soldiers, heading off toward Ostagar. I sighed before going off back into the castle. Howe wouldn't try until late at night when we're all asleep. For that, it was time to put my trust in someone. I went toward the bedrooms and saw Oriana reading to Oren. I knocked politely.
"Nia. What brings you here this evening?" Oriana asked. I saluted before taking a breath.
"Oriana, do you trust me?" I asked. Oriana closed her book.
"Of course I do Nia. Your work has been astounding these two years." Oriana smiled. I gulped.
"Then would you trust me when I say that Howe is going to attack the castle?" I said. Oriana gave me a confused face. "I know, I have no proof whatsoever but please, I am begging you, believe me." I knelt down. "I wouldn't even consider this an option unless I had absolute faith that Howe is planning against the Cousland family." I bowed my head low.
"Are you certain beyond all belief?" Oriana question boomed in the room.
"Mama?" Oren wondered.
"Yes." I looked up. Oriana stared at me before going to her chest and withdrawing a few daggers.
"When will their attack happen?" Oriana asked. My heart soared but I squashed the feeling down. Not until I was able to save them.
"Tonight at midnight. They mean to take the castle while the soldiers are gone. They will aim for you and Oren first before moving onto Eren and Eleanor. My advice is to bar the door until I come back with Bryce." I suggested, coming out and motioning toward the bookshelves and chests. Oriana nodded. I did my best to bar as much as I could before I squeezed myself out.
My breath came out as a wisp as winter night fell. There was a full moons tonight so I knew I would be able to easily track the carriage once we go out of the servant's exit. I went out and sneaked toward Bryce's study near the main hall. The halls were silent. The forces were minimal at best and, during the night when the defenses are down, that will be the time to strike.
I kept my footsteps light, my memories replaying as I walked through the castle. It hurt but I couldn't let myself be hindered. I reached Bryce's study. I remembered all those times I gave him my report for Eren's behavior. The old and stern face, the way he carried himself as a proud warrior and father. It was something I would never forget. Bryce would have been better as a King than Cailan in my opinion. I stood by the door, my daggers at my hands.
It was now or never. I steeled my resolve and slammed the door open and saw Howe with a dagger in his hand. Bryce looked at me with confusion and panic. Howe recovered quickly and went forward to stab Bryce in the back.
"Stay back!" I shouted. Bryce quickly grabbed the dagger with his hands to try to wrestle it out of Howe. I saw the hesitation and my legs weren't quick enough.
Howe, with a sneer of hate playing on his lips, stabbed Bryce in the stomach. Rage filled my eyes as I finally tackled Howe to the ground. Even though he was older, he was still spry and kicked me off and ran out. I had a thought to chase him down but instead I went to Bryce. He groaned in pain while grabbing the dagger.
"Wait, you'll bleed to death if you take it out." I said, going through his desk and finding bandages.
"Agh, why would…" Bryce groaned in pain.
"I hate to say this my lord but Howe was never your friend. He was only buying time." I sighed. I gathered the gauze and sat Bryce against the wall. "This is going to hurt." I said, taking the dagger. Bryce nodded. I pulled the dagger out quickly and poured some potion on it. It was able to seal some of it but not all of it. I put the gauze on and wrapped it tightly around Bryce's waist. I pulled it tight and helped him to his feet as we got out of the study.
"If…what you said is true…then what of my family?" Bryce pleaded.
"I warned Oriana and she has barred the entrance to the bedrooms but I'm not sure how long that will last." I explained until I heard the warning bells, inside the castle, ring. We barely avoided fire arrows that started to burn everything before Bryce tugged me down and put his hands on my shoulder.
"You must go and protect my family. Don't let Howe get his hands on them." Bryce gritted his teeth.
"But my lord I need to get you to-"
"Do not worry about me. Your concern must be with my family. Protect them at all costs. I will try to meet you at the servant's exit. This is your order." Bryce squeezed my shoulders. I bit my cheek.
"Yes my lord." I nodded. He gave me his nod before he leaned against the wall and started to make his way toward the larder. I said a small prayer before retracing my steps toward the bedrooms. The fire was spreading quickly and, if it wasn't for the open hallways, I would be choking by now. I heard big booms of something and had enough time to avoid rubble. I don't know what were Howe's men doing but they were determined to bring this castle down. I already heard the sounds of fighting when I approached the hallway towards the bedroom. The few soldiers that stayed were outnumbered and I went to help them. I knocked out the archer that was closest to me before heading up to the three Howe soldiers against the Cousland ones.
I sprinted before bashing in one's helmet. It did an awful ringing nose that made the man scream and kneel. I evaded a sword slash before crouching and doing a sweeping kick. With the two that I knocked down, the other two guards overpowered the Howe soldier before picking off the others ones.
"Have you seen Eren or anyone else?" I asked, sheathing my daggers.
"No and we can't get through their bedroom doors." The guard replied.
"Good." I nodded before going down the hallway. I tried the door and it wouldn't budge. "Oriana! It's me! I found Bryce but he wanted to make sure everyone else was safe!" I shouted.
"Is Bryce all right?!" Eleanor shouted.
"I'll explain once you open the door!" Once I said that, barking and the sounds of shuffling were heard through the door. Finally, the door opened and out came Eren, Oriana, and Eleanor. Oriana was the only one without armor. Oren followed behind Oriana, clutching her hand tightly.
"Where is Bryce?" Eleanor asked immediately. I held in a sigh.
"I tried to save Bryce from Howe but he stabbed him in the gut. I was able to use a potion to mend he wound but only on the outside. He still needs medical attention but he wouldn't let me help him. He wanted me to accompany you and make sure you're escorted safely." I explained. Eleanor looked crestfallen before Eren grabbed my shoulders and looked at me up and down. He gave a sigh of relief.
"You're safe as well. Now that we have gathered everyone, we must find our way out of the castle and to safety. Nia, protect Oriana and Oren. They will be at the rear. Mother, Alfred, we'll be at the front fighting against our enemy. Mother, are you sure you're up to this?" Eren asked her.
"You should not worry or fret my son. I will shoot my arrows at every bastard that comes our way. You can be sure of that." Eleanor glared, taking her bow. "Nia, protect my daughter-in-law and my grandson."
"I swear Eleanor." I nodded.
"We've wasted enough time here." Eren started to lead us. We went of the bedrooms and I took out my daggers. The guards that I helped were already fighting against other soldiers. The fire was spreading and a few parts of the castle was crumbling. Our straight get away toward the larders was stopped by debris and fire. A few bodies were burning near us and gave me the unpleasant smell of cooked pork. I nearly gagged.
"Andraste's knickers, we can't go this way. We must go through the main hall." Eren growled.
"We can do this son." Eleanor nodded. Eren took the lead again and we walked down the hallway. Eren held a hand up and we stopped. He signaled five and motioned his mother to come closer.
"Shoot at one of them and then you charge, Alfred." Eren commanded. Eleanor got her bow ready and Alfred's muzzle pulled back to show his teeth. Eleanor managed to hit a vital point and Alfred charged. He took one down by the neck. Two down, three to go. Eren charged in and got someone with a shield bash. Eleanor already took down another one and Alfred went for the last one's legs. They screamed as Alfred crushed his leg. Eren silenced him with his sword.
He motioned us to follow. I pushed Oriana and Oren forward while keeping back. That was the case as we sneaked closer to the main hall. Eren would send Eleanor and Alfred first then he would charge in to distract them. I held back to make sure that no one sneaked up on us. The more we fought, the more guards we found. Many of them were lying in their pools of blood, taken down by Howe's men. Those few that were alive still stood with us. Finally, after fighting two more groups, we entered the main hall.
I kept Oriana back as I saw Howe's mage at the forefront. Eleanor, Eren, and Alfred helped the last of the guards push them back. I heard something behind me and got my arm bit by an enemy mabari. It took me down while another of Howe's men went to attack Oriana. Oren was crying while I drew my arm back and stabbed the mabari's head. I took it off and my armor was dented. I heard a cry of pain and Oriana had a cut across her thigh.
I tackled the man down and we wrestled until I wrapped my legs around him. I put him into an immediate chokehold. He gasped and tried to claw at my arms before he passed out. I released him but Oriana was resourceful. She ripped her dress and wrapped it around her wound. She grabbed Oren and we went into the main hall where everyone was gathered. Howe's men lay dead while the few guards kept the main gate closed.
"Ser Gilmore have you seen my father?" Eren asked as he passed him.
"Yes. He was wounded but was certain that you would find him at the servant's exit. Please milord you must go! We cannot hold them off for much longer." Gilmore explained.
"Then we'll go. May the Maker guide you Gilmore." Eren had a hitch in his breath as he squeezed Gilmore's shoulder in respect before leading us across the main hall. The booms of Howe's men trying to break through echoed through the hallways.
"Wait, we need to get the Cousland sword and shield. Those cannot fall to Howe's hands." Eleanor said.
"Mother those are only trinkets. Your lives are worth more than a sword and shield." Eren argued.
"They may seem that way to you but those will serve you once you grant our castle the due it deserves. Come, it is not far." Eleanor explained. We followed her but, when we opened the door, we were hit by three of Howe's men. Eren bashed the first one in the face while Alfred got the other one's legs. I slipped past, tripped the last one, and punched into his chest and into his solar plex. He retched on the floor before I punched him in the dome. All three were down.
Eleanor found the key to the door. Eren found the sword and shield and replaced his own with them. Eleanor nodded before we came out and got ambushed by two archers and their dogs. Oriana shrieked when one mabari tackled her down. Alfred was quickly on top and wrestled it off. The damage was done to her shoulder. Oren shouted but I quickly put him back through the door while slashing at the other mabari with Oriana behind me shielding Oren.
Eren took down one archer and Eleanor, while getting shot in the leg, did a headshot to the other archer. Alfred killed the other mabari that was on top of Oriana. I killed the other that made it past by stabbing downward on its skull. I took it off my dagger while going over to Oriana. She shuddered in pain and I tried to reach into my pack for potions but they were all cracked.
"Shit! My potions are gone." I panicked.
"Not…to worry." Oriana groaned.
"Mama." Oren cried. She wiped his eyes.
"We need to get out of here and get medical help." Eren growled.
"Come on." I helped her up. Her face was pale and her skin was clammy. Her breath was coming out uneven. "Oriana?"
"I feel strange." She confessed.
"There they are!" We were hit by a large group and a man that was covered in plate armor. I quickly put Oriana into a corner and ordered Oren not to move. I ran toward them, Alfred was fighting against the mabari. Eleanor was ducking and weaving against their archer and Eren was caught in the middle with the other three. I tackled the one that was aiming at his back and knuckled him in the nose. I rolled away from the heavily armored man.
I twirled away to his back and crouched to knock him in his knees. He knelt down. I put my dagger underneath his neck and slashed. He gurgled and I coughed out in guilt. I looked up and the others were down. Oren was screaming though. We ran back to him and Oriana's lips were blue and her eyes were bloodshot.
"P-Poison." She shivered. I looked at the bandages around her thigh and it was black. Eleanor put her hand to her mouth. I growled in frustration and kicked some debris.
"Nia! This is not time for that." Eren grabbed my injured forearm. I hissed in pain and he let go. Oriana had shallow breathing.
"We shouldn't stay here." Eleanor whispered. I nodded.
"I'll carry you." I said softly. Oriana nodded and I carried her bridal style. We went into the larder. Nan, Thellan, and Awell were dead on the floor. I squashed my grief down. Bryce was leaning against the wall and Eleanor quickly went to his side.
"Lay me down here." Oriana suggested. I put her against the wall and she whispered a few things to Oren of which I couldn't hear.
"My love and my sweet boy…" Bryce said softly.
"It's all right dear, we made it through Howe's forces." Eleanor said, sitting next to him.
"Father the exit is right there. We need to leave now." Eren urged.
"I can't. I am bleeding inside. No magic can heal me." Bryce explained.
"Ma? Ma!" I heard Oren cry.
"Bryce?" Eleanor pleaded. He shook his head. My heart was pounding and there was a lump in my throat. Alfred whined.
"Please father!" Eren begged, his voice cracking. Eleanor's face changed.
"My love, you must leave." Eleanor took out her bow.
"What? No! I am not leaving without both of you!" Eren argued. I heard shouts coming from outside.
"Your father will not survive and I will not leave him." Eleanor replied.
"And please…take Oren…" Oriana wheezed.
"Mama!" Oren screamed.
"This…I can't…" Eren started to weep.
"Nia, take my family and go. Swear that you will protect them." Bryce commanded. I pushed down my grief.
"Yes my lord." I nodded.
"Father, mother, please!" Eren begged on his knees. I grabbed Oren and grabbed Eren's shoulder. He shrugged it off but I kept pulling him.
"We need to go now! Eren!" I yelled, hearing the main gate crashing through. Eren got up, shakily and we got to the servant's exit.
"Goodbye my son." Eleanor said. We went down the ladder and I led Oren and Eren out of the castle with Alfred right behind us. We got out and they both tightly held my hand. Eren stopped and saw his childhood home slowly burning. Eren was shivering as tears flowed freely from his eyes. Alfred whined. I pulled on Eren's hand.
"We need to go. We can't…" I gulped down. "We can't let their sacrifice be in vain." I harshly whispered, trying to keep my own tears in check. Eren looked at me with a vacant look. I have never seen him so broken and small. As we walked, I saw the carriage there. I bumped into the door and the rider woke up. He seemed confused at first before seeing the castle on fire and our disheveled appearance. Once we were inside, he booked it.
As soon as we were on our way to Denerim, Oren and Eren both broke down. I could only cry silently as I had to be the strong one. I couldn't break, not now. Everyone is resting in a small inn we found on the road. The rider agreed to take us to Denerim for the rest of the trip. Eren and Oren are resting in one bedroom and I can't sleep. The events were too fresh. I'm exhausted but I'm so afraid to sleep. Everything is haunting me. I failed…
Shout out to FearaNightmare for beta'ing!
Yes! we finally got here! I told it would be in the twenties :3 Now you know what's next kiddies? THE BLIGHT! :D
Shout out to LadyDragon1316, Kurosaki95, Melony33, and tsogh-a-ma-i for following/favoriting!
Blooddoll1: The answer to the first is here. The answer to your second lies in other chapters :3
ChaiTea: Yes this is a rewrite and it's completely different from my first one. I love my first one because it made me realize I could write a fic that was long and well coherent but it was rife with errors and plot holes. It was also very, very rushed. In this one, I'm taking my time and fleshing a few scenarios out not only with Nia but with all the dragon age cast. I'm also including new information that came out in inquisition to make it feel like Nia knows more.
Thank you Chimera Spyke, HollySutterlin, ThelonewolfNT, and Syutaku for reviewing!