Mind Tricks

by Corellian Blue

(first published 2003, revised 2016, 2020)

Warnings: mental health issues

XII

Han was sleeping peacefully when Leia entered the cabin, the whisper of the hatch as it opened failing to wake him. He was usually a light sleeper but as he hadn't had many restful nights since his release from the carbonite, she wasn't surprised that she had not roused him. Not even the ambient light spilling across his face from the corridor disturbed him. She wondered if the combination of spice and Force-suggestion had placed him into a deep sleep.

Leia closed the hatch and undressed while her eyes adjusted to the darkness. Han had pulled a light cover over himself before falling asleep and she lifted it up and climbed over him to get to her side of the bunk.

Han turned in his sleep, draped an arm across her waist and pulled her into his body. Leia snuggled into him backwards, enjoying the warmth and touch of his skin. The movement of her backside against his groin aroused more than just his mind and she spent a few minutes silently murmuring ideas of relaxation to him. His breathing deepened and the weight of his forearm increased across her waist.

When she was certain he was ensconced in sleep, Leia allowed her consciousness to drift into his. There was no resistance from him this time, no need to soothe and reassure him, and she assumed the medication had eased her way. What she could sense of his mind also gave her comfort. His thoughts appeared more ordered than they previously had, and the only strong emotion she could discern was contentment.

Recalling the research she had compiled on the datapad, Leia focussed on the names of the chemical neurotransmitters that appeared to be partially responsible for the chemical imbalance in his brain: serotonin, dopamine…

A wave of uncertainty gripped her. What did she know about psychotherapy? These were just words to her. Words she had known but barely understood before this morning, and how much could she have expected to learn after only a few hours of research? What did she honestly believe she could do to help Han?

Leia stumbled, lost concentration and found herself back outside Han's mind again. Cursing herself for rushing, Leia eased her way back in and decided to take things slower and to start with the things she was certain of.

I love you, her mind whispered to his. I love your confidence and your belief in yourself. I love your loyalty to your friends, your heroism in the face of adversity, and your need to protect those you care about.

I love you because you'll always be there for me. You always have been there for me, right from the beginning, and every time I tried to push you away and deny my feelings for you.

I love that you think you're tougher and harder than you really are. Deep down, you're softest, kindest man I've ever known.

I love your eyes and the way you look at me. I love your laugh, your smile. I love what that smile does to me.

And I love the way you love me.

Leia knew which path to take.

There was nothing specific she had to concentrate on, no chemical levels to raise or block, no psychological terms she had to remember or magic to conjure up. It was less exact than that and yet it would be far more effective than science.

She stretched out her consciousness, mapping and weaving it over and through Han's, until they were loosely enmeshed, as if she was making love to his mind. And then she gave her strength and her love to him again.

I love you. I love your confidence and your belief in yourself. I love your loyalty to your friends, your heroism…