Summary:
In this chapter I tried to imagine what the hell happened in the woods, how Garrett managed to brainwash Ward and what happened to Buddy.
Also here please be warned: there is graphic depiction of torture.
I'm so sorry...
Comments are greatly appreciated: please, let me know what you think!
Chapter:
The next image was about John Garret in the juvenile visiting room.
"Grant Ward?
My name is John Garrett.
The quartermaster at your military school is an old buddy of mine. He told me about a pissed-off young cadet with off-the-chart eye-hand coordination who went AWOL, stole a car, and drove over a thousand miles home only to burn the place down.
I must say, I find a young man like that intriguing."
Grant didn't say anything.
"I'm curious: did you know your brother was in the house, when you set it on fire?"
And the Beast inside spoke "If only he died! And father, too!"
But he didn't know.
And Garrett went on with his proposal to join him in a secret organization, instead of passing several years in prison:
"Going with me will be the hardest thing you've ever done.
But, on the other hand, no one will ever screw with you again.
Say yes."
And the Beast roared:
"Yes".
The next image was of him in the woods, under the rain, scared, soaked, hungry, chilled to the bones and trying to warm himself hugging Buddy.
But the Beast within was strong and made his mind tunnel focus on survival.
He organized himself: he started raiding cabins, stealing tools and supplies and weapons, constructing a camp; he learned to kill animals in the woods, cutting and cooking and skin them to eat and obtain rugs; he found fresh water to drink and wash himself; he experimented on different herbs and berries and other vegetables to eat; he even constructed a cabin himself, out of his mere arms strength, with an axe and a pulley. He found then very useful all those hours he spent observing the masons build and fix things at his house, when he was little.
His body became very strong and resilient to exertion, all adverse weathers and diseases.
But in the night, when his mind could wander, not concentrated on all the activities, he always felt a so heavy loneliness, a so grand isolation, a so terribly longing for human contact that he felt like drowning.
He hadn't anyone to talk to, anyone to see, and anyone to smile at…
But he resisted, through sheer willpower.
And sometimes, also, he prayed and life suddenly appeared to be more bearable.
When, every now and then, Garrett returned to him, with something different to eat, like bread and other carbohydrates, books, news, lessons about strategy and tactics… there was not even once that his heart didn't swell with happiness and pleasure and a sense of comfort and belonging!
He loved the man, even if his return meant hard work, combat training, humiliations, scoldings, and even torture.
Really being with him was the toughest thing he ever did!
The training about resisting torture was in absolute the toughest of all and seldom Garrett needed help for that: he kept bringing with him another guy, always the same, that took turns in torturing Grant in all the cases the procedure itself needed a lot of time to fulfil.
It wasn't for nothing that Grant didn't like anybody touching him!
Garrett's repertoire spaced on a huge amount of methodics, although he was always careful not to cause permanent damage: isolation (and that was always in place), physical aggression, beating including repeated slapping and flogging, burning, sleep deprivation to the point of hallucination, sensory deprivation, waterboarding, limb contortions, prolonged binding in stress positions, hooding, psychological terror induced by drugs or scaring animals or mock executions, humiliations and exposure in nudity conditions, starvation, electroshock, exposure to extreme temperatures inducing hyper or hypothermia, prolonged confinement in a small coffin-like box, bombardment with agonizing sounds at extremely high decibel levels, interrogations lasting up to 20 hours straight…
After one of those, during which Garrett managed to extort a lot of personal and familiar details from Grant, he exclaimed:
"Your family, son, really royally messed up with you!"
Now Grant had no secrets for Garrett, except for the memories covered by amnesia.
Garrett knew him better than himself!
At the end of each session, Garrett always played the part of the saviour, comforting and cheering up Grant, with the sole objective to make him completely loyal.
The lighter torture was the one that implied sticking pins under his fingernails, while probably the worst was sleep deprivation. During those days in which Garrett managed to keep him awake, with strong noises or lights or yelling, beatings, slaps, electricity… his mind was more and more obfuscated, fogged. His spirit was deadly tired, his legs were instable and he had one only desire: sleep! But he couldn't and he would be gone mad or dead if Garrett didn't stop.
Even waterboarding was terrible. He wouldn't say that, because apparently it was nothing: Garrett immobilized him on a declined table, feet raised and head slightly below the feet, then wrapped his face with a cloth, then simply started pouring water on the cloth for little more than ten seconds. But that was enough to make Grant experience the sensation of asphyxiating and drowning and that was terrifying! His mind told him he was dying! He struggled so fiercely against the restraints that he almost broke his wrists and couldn't take a bath for weeks, not to mention the nightmares!
The techniques to resist torture varied with the torture methodology, but resistance depended most on Grant's ability to concentrate and to make his mind go blank like a puppet, to reach such an auto-induced hypnotic state that, sort of, he almost wasn't in his body anymore.
It was called "mental dissociation".
And that was how Garrett brainwashed him.
The Beast was tamed.
The next image was about Buddy yelping and wriggling on the ground. One day Garrett told him that Shield Operations Division accepted him, effect immediate.
"What you have been through and endured during these five years is way further than anyone there will experience in a lifetime.
You are worlds apart from anyone of them.
You will be the best" Garret said proudly to him.
"Thank you, sir, for everything." Ward thanked back.
"Don't do that. You don't owe me or anybody else a thing. You earned it by yourself.
It's gonna be hard when you get there. If you're gonna work within Shield for Hydra, you can't ever get attached to anyone or anything.
You have to fight that weakness in you."
"Yes, sir."
"Good. Now take care of Buddy, and we'll get out of here.
That's not a weakness, is it?"
"No, sir."
Garrett wanted him to KILL Buddy! He couldn't believe that!
"Good. I'll be at the truck."
But Grant couldn't, he hadn't the heart to kill his loyal and trustworthy companion, his beloved dog!
He simply couldn't!
The brainwashing could have wiped his brains but it didn't manage to transform his heart in a stone. And he shot in the air with his pistol, knowing that Buddy would run away to rescue an inexistent prey.
What Grant wasn't aware of was that Garrett was watching him like a vulture and was extremely pissed off by his disobedience.
He failed in Grant's training: his protégé had a huge Achilles' heel. It was his own heart and Garrett knew only a way to make the lesson sink down.
He took aim with a sniper rifle and shot Buddy, but not with a mortal blow. He only wounded it and then dragged Grant in front of a whimpering Buddy to show him the yearning spectacle.
Grant wanted to finish Buddy off, to stop its pain, but Garrett prevented him from breaking its neck.
A silent speech came from Garrett's severe stare:
"Kid, don't ever disobey me. Otherwise I will torture your loved ones to death right in front of you."
So they left, while Buddy remained there, bleeding out on the ground alone, unable to move, but still wagging its tail to its master…
Grant felt his heart tore in two, one half remaining with Buddy and the other remaining in his chest, aching at every beat, but swallowed the tears, put on the mask and left.
He learned his lesson.