May 29th 2018

Spencer's phone had buzzed just as he was leaving the large glass doors for the day. He sighed, held them open for the lady who'd followed him from the elevator and then turned back into the slowly quietening building. As he stepped back out of the elevator, into the hallway in front of the BAU's office, footsteps came from the stairwell to his left. Dressed in her civilian clothes, with her hair hanging damp around her bare face, was Sasha.

"Hey," Spencer breathed, just loud enough for the approaching M.E. to hear. She gave him a weak smile, her green eyes dull and lacking their usual mischievous sparkle.

"Evening, Dr Reid." She nodded and stepped ahead of him into the BAU's office. A hint of fresh lemon hit Spencer in place of her usual apricot shampoo.

"Lemon?"

"It's been a long and shitty day." She sighed walking herself into the briefing room and away from Spencer, ending the conversation.

Spencer had been calculating his next move during their briefing. Young women turning up on the streets beaten and bruised and looking like they'd been through a modern day witch trail. Sasha was with them as an extra set of eyes over the process as the M.E. in Titusville was struggling under the pressure - hence their call out. As they'd filed out of the briefing room to make their way out onto the tarmac to meet the plane, Spencer followed Sasha. And as they entered the plane, he made sure to slide himself into the queue behind JJ, who was chatting away to Sasha. Her answers had been pleasant, but short and clearly exhausted.

Spencer made sure to sit across from her. He noted the glance of annoyance she shot him as he did and while it stung, he decided to ignore it. They didn't speak until they were in the air. Sasha, clearly uncomfortable, was trying to settle, but kept pulling back over the tablet with the case files on.

"Coffee?" Spencer said while holding out a white mug filled with the dark liquid.

"God, yes!" Sasha sighed, offering Spencer the first genuine smile of the day while she shoved the tablet away and accepted the offered drink.

"How are you?"

"Dealing." She shrugged.

"You never replied to my texts." She shrugged again and stared straight into her coffee cup.

"It's been hard." She eventually said. "I felt like I'd been hit by a bus," Spencer nodded. Of course she'd have felt that way. It was a massive discovery. "Only for you to celebrate it." His heart sank. He hadn't meant to 'celebrate' her diagnosis. He didn't feel like he had. He'd thought he'd been supportive. He replayed the entire meeting in the cafe over and over in his head. Yes, he'd been relieved that she hadn't been pregnant - that he wasn't possibly passing on his defective genes - but he'd shared his reasoning, he'd told her how sorry he was. She'd never even indicated that she was thinking about children yet!

"Earth to Spencer?" J.J. waved her hand in front of his eyes. Her face full of concern.

"Oh... yes... sorry."

"Are you okay, Spence?" She put her hand on his shoulder. He wanted to tell her everything. But it was too late now - what good would it do? - not to mention, they were supposed to be focusing on the case.

"Yeah," He said distractedly. "I'm fine."

"You sure?" Her blue eyes locked with his. He nodded. "Okay." She didn't sound convinced, but she released his shoulder and turned back to the evidence board.

"Hey, J.J.?"

"Hmm?"

"How do you make it up to someone when you've really messed up?"

They'd been in Titusville a couple of days before Spencer had found the time, and confidence, to knock on that door. He waited one minute, then two, then three. She wasn't going to answer. He knew she was in her hotel room. Alvez had confided in Spencer and J.J. that he'd practically had to drag her there and lock her in - that he'd told the front desk to call him if she tried to leave the hotel.

As he turned to walk away, he heard a click. He turned back, a few feet from the threshold now, to see the door partially open. A sleepy looking Sasha stood in a pair of mid thigh length shorts and a tank top. Her blonde hair was scrunched up in a messy bun and she was squinting through her glasses. Spencer had woken her. She rarely wore her glasses which Spencer thought was a shame. The black shallow frames suited her.

"Spencer?" Her voice was thick with sleep.

"I woke you," he simply stated. "I'm sorry - I'll just leave."

"No," she seemed to be waking up some more now, her eyes appearing brighter. "Whats wrong?"

"I ..." Spencer felt rather pathetic now, even more so when he muttered the next words. "I just want to talk."

"Come in then," she opened the thin door further, letting light into what Spencer could see was a dark hotel room. He shuffled passed her, unable to turn away now he'd been 'caught'. The door clicked shut, plunging them into darkness before a second click flooded the room with artificial light. She padded, barefoot, around him and sat herself on the end of the bed, one toned leg tucked under her and the other dangling over the edge. She held out a hand, motioning to the simple wooden chair at the small desk in the room.

"So..." Spencer said suddenly feeling awkward.

"So." Sasha copied.

"I... I'm sorry, Sash," Spencer finally got out. She nodded. "I truly never meant to hurt you. I just didn't realise you wanted kids yet and the words just sort of came out before I could think." Sasha nodded again and the room fell back into silence.

"I didn't." She said finally. "I still don't really." She sighed. "It just, sort of backs you into a corner. Going in expecting one piece of information and being given another." Spencer just nodded dumbly. "Honestly, Spencer, I don't want to have your kids."

"Sorry?" The comment wasn't entirely out of the blue. But he still wasn't expecting it.

"Think about it," She said reaching out for his hand. "We're both addicts, you run the risk of hereditary psychosis, I have a hole in my heart - we're not genetically the right people to be reproducing. Especially not together."

"You have a hole in your heart?"

"I love that that's what you took away from that," She smiled at him. "Found in the full work up they did thanks to the diagnosis. Must have been there all along though."

"So that's us then?" He nodded, looking at their joined hands.

"If you want it to be," Her voice was quiet again. "But I was... I was thinking that maybe we could just carry on playing whatever game this is until we really get bored of each other."

"And what if you do want kids?"

"There's always adoption." She shrugged. Spencer's face broke out into a grin as he leaned forward into Sasha, catching her lips with his own and taking her by surprise. The force of their kiss pushed them both onto the bed Sasha had been sitting on. Spencer's hands went straight to his favourite curves of Sasha's body. He groaned deeply at the feel of the bare flesh. Her hips bucked into him and her hands slid quickly down his body to his belt. She continued to work his belt while he pushed himself closer to her. He needed the contact. Sasha seemed too as well because as soon as Spencer's belt was loose she pulled at the buttons of his chino's and slid her hand into the space now made between the coarse fabric of the outer layer and his cotton underwear. The feel of her hand cupping his hardened length brought him back in to the room.

"We should stop."

"Doesn't feel like you want to, Spencer," she hummed against his neck.

"But... oh god Sash." she was right, he didn't want to. But they'd not been talking for so long. Then talking about children they didn't want to have? "The timing-"

"Is perfect," She bit him lightly. "A month without you... that was too much."

"I haven't any -"

"I'm still on the pill." She was sliding her hand under the waist band of his shorts now. "And practically infertile."

"Shit,"Spencer sat up on his elbow. "I didn't mean to -"

"Bring it up." Sasha finished. "I know, but now how about you start making it up to me?"

Spencer couldn't believe it. Their phones had beeped at the same time. Prentiss phoning Spencer and Alvez calling Sasha. Sasha had jumped from the bed, grabbing her phone and running, naked, to the bathroom to take the call leaving Spence free to answer his call from Prentiss.

"Where are you?"

"I .. um... I needed some sleep," Spencer quickly lied. There hadn't been any sleeping going on.

"Sorry to wake you," Prentiss sighed. "We need you back though. Could you catch a lift with Miss Clarke? Alvez says she's getting ready to leave now."

"See you in 20." Spencer clicked off the call just as Sasha walked out of the bathroom. "Same message?"

"I assume so." Sasha began looking for her discarded clothing. "You know, it'd be nice if the serial killers could just take a moment to consider what they might be interrupting." Spencer chuckled. Serial killers didn't consider anything but their own gratification. But Spencer knew that Sasha knew that. So he kept his thought to himself.

They dressed in a comfortable silence. Spencer had quickly checked the hall before opening the door fully giving them space to leave. If he'd been paying attention and not still riding the high that had been his short time back between Sasha's creamy thighs, he would have noticed how her eyes clouded over and her smile faltered as he checked to make sure no one saw them leaving the room together.

Once they were in the car, the silence had become uncomfortable. Sasha was staring out of the window, barely blinking.

"You're quiet." Spencer observed out loud. "Are you regretting what we did?"

"No."

"Did I do something wrong?" The silence hung heavy in the air for a fraction too long before Sasha replied.

"I assume that with the making sure we weren't seen that this isn't a public knowledge type of thing." Spencer felt his stomach lurch. She thought he was embarrassed by their relationship.

"Sasha - it's not like that at all," Spencer started.

"Is it not?"

"No," He sighed. "It can't be known that we were having ... you know-"

"Sex."

"Yes... Sex... when we're on a case." It was Sasha's turn to sigh now.

"I suppose."

"We can go back to how things were when we get home," Spencer offered. "If you'd like?"

"Perhaps." Sasha hummed as they pulled into the car park. Nothing more was said on the matter as she exited the vehicle and made her way into the police station before Spencer had even killed the engine.