A/N: We find out what Dean is doing now that Sam is gone. Thank you for deciding to take this journey with me. I hope you enjoy this AU I created. Reviews are great. NC

Chapter 3

After the shock of what just happened wore off, Dean tried to sleep, but it wouldn't come. His rage was building from what John had done and said to Sam. He knew he was completely obsessed with finding the demon that killed their Mom, but he had gone too far this time. Dean knew he still loved them, but sometimes he could be so blind that he couldn't see what was right in front of him. He had a son accepted to freakin' Stanford of all places, and he should have been bursting with pride, but all he could see was he was losing a soldier in his need for his revenge.

Dean rolled over and wondered if he drove to the bus station if Sam would still be there. He knew there would be no talking Sam out of doing this since when he set his mind to something, he wouldn't stop until he accomplished it. He was as stubborn as their father, if not more. And what was funny was neither one of them would admit how alike they were. He thought that was why they butted heads so much and were at odds with each other all the time. Sometimes, he was so tired of playing referee for the two of them and just wanted to leave it all behind.

Going would at least give him a chance to say goodbye to Sam and wish him luck. He wasn't sure how he would greet him, because he didn't stand up to their father for Sam like he had done in the past or stop him from kicking Sam out of their lives. He looked at the clock and saw several hours had passed, but he couldn't lay there any longer and got up to grab his keys for the Impala before heading out the door. He didn't know anything about bus schedules but maybe he would be lucky, and the one Sam would want hadn't left yet.

Dean pulled up to the bus station and got out. He looked around at the milling people searching for his tall brother's shaggy head. Not seeing him anywhere outside, Dean headed inside to see if he was there. He stepped to the ticket booth to see when the last bus heading west went out. His shoulders slumped when he was told it had left fifteen minutes ago but there was another one leaving in six hours if he wanted a ticket. He thanked the attendant, and with a heavy heart headed back to the car. He was too late; Sammy was gone now, and he never got to say goodbye or tell him he was proud of him. He was amazed that he had been able to get a free ride to Stanford with the way they moved around from one place to another, never staying long enough for them to finish a school year in one place. It was a great achievement for him where Dean dropped out of high school at sixteen to start hunting full time. He was able to do online classes and get his GED a couple of years ago.

He pulled his cell from his jacket and opened his contact list. He scrolled through the names until he came to the letter S and let his finger hover over it. If the bus only left fifteen minutes ago, he knew Sammy wouldn't be asleep yet and he could talk to him. Doubt invaded his thoughts making him wonder if Sam would even pick up when he saw the caller id. He was sure Sam was hurt, mad, and upset by what John had said and what Dean didn't do, so he decided to give him a little space for now. He closed the cell and shoved it back into his jacket pocket before cranking the Impala and driving away, none the wiser of what had really happened to Sam.

The motel parking lot loomed ahead of him, and he slowed to pull into it and to the back to park beside his father's truck. Mixed emotions swirled through his mind as he sat there not sure what to do. He was so enraged at his Dad that he didn't know if he could face him without taking a punch at him. At this moment, the only thing he wanted to do was knock him flat on his ass and tell him what a bad father he was. He knew things had been hard for them growing up and he knew that John tried, but this was unforgiveable.

With his mind made up, he got out and went inside to pack. He needed to get away from him to think and to let his anger settle. Dean went to the door of the bedroom and looked in at his drunk, unconscious father one more time before scribbling a note to stick under the empty whiskey bottle. All it said was he couldn't be around him right now but if he needed backup on a hunt to call. Dean picked up his bags and headed to the Impala, tossing them in the back and leaving. He would hunt on his own for a while and once he had given Sammy time to settle, he would contact him. Dean wanted to be sure Sam knew that what their father had said was not what he felt and wanted to be sure he knew if he needed anything to call him. He was not shutting Sammy out of his life no matter what his father said or did.

spn

Dean pulled into the familiar surroundings of Singer Salvage Yard and eased the car to the front of the house. He sat there a moment looking at the place before noticing the owner coming from a garage bay at the side of the house wiping his hands on a rag. He got out and strolled toward the older hunter, mentor, and friend not sure what to say.

"Dean," Bobby greeted him as he looked past him to see he was alone. It had been a while since he had seen any of the Winchesters and only spoken to them over the phone when they needed some research done. Dean by himself was not a good sign.

"Hey Bobby," Dean replied as he stopped in front of him and scuffed at the dirt with the toe of his boot.

"So, he did it," Bobby grunted when Dean didn't say anything else or look at him.

"How'd you…." Dean started as shock and anger flashed in his eyes.

"Sam used my place as a mailing address since he needed a place for the application."

"And you didn't think that was something I should know?" Dean yelled.

"Watch that tone with me boy!" Bobby growled at him. "Remember who ya talkin' to."

"Sorry Bobby, it's just I don't understand why he didn't tell me," Dean sighed as he hung his head in shame at yelling at him.

"What would you have done? Stop him? Tell yer Daddy so he could stop him? Sam wanted out and I'm glad he got it," Bobby responded. "That boy never liked the life no matter how hard he tried to hide it. He's not like you or me, we thrive on it. It's in our blood."

"Yeah, I know you're right."

"Where's yer Daddy?"

"I left him in a motel, sleeping it off. I couldn't stay with him. Not after what he did."

"What did he do?"

"He told Sammy if he left to not ever come back. He said he wasn't family anymore," Dean said in a small voice that cracked at the end. He pushed back the sob before going on. "What's worse is I didn't do anything to stop him. I just sat there like a damn fool and let it happen. I'm the worse brother…"

"No Dean, you're not. It was a shock to you, and you didn't know how to deal with it."

"I didn't even tell him goodbye or that I was so proud of him," he whispered. "I went to the bus station, but I waited too long, and he was already gone."

"Well, that don't mean you can't visit or call him. C'mon, I think you need a shot or two," Bobby said throwing an arm around his shoulders and steering him for the house. The Winchester boys were like the sons he never had, and it pained him to see one hurting this much. He never thought when he first met them that they could worm their way into his ice, cold heart but they did, and they melted it.

He was proud to have been a part of raising them, though he wished he could have had more influence and maybe Dean might have headed off to college too. Even though Dean tried to hide it, Bobby knew he was just as smart as Sam, maybe even smarter in some things. The problem with Dean was that he had to grow up too fast and ended up being a father, mother, brother and protector for his little brother and never got the chance to be a kid or to have his own life. Bobby couldn't help but admit that Dean was a natural born hunter and becoming one of the best he had seen. He was loyal to a fault to his father and his only weakness was his love for his little brother.

"Think I can bunk out here for a few days until I can find a hunt?" Dean asked as he took a seat at the kitchen table.

"Of course, stay as long as you need. You're always welcome here son," Bobby replied pulling two glasses from the strainer and a bottle of Jack Daniels from the cabinet.

"Maybe I'll give my Baby a once over and do an oil change."

"I've got a couple of cars out there I could use some help on if you're willing."

"Sure, anything I can do to help," Dean said perking up some. Working on cars was a passion of his and he enjoyed getting his hands dirty, plus, maybe it would take his mind off his brother for a little while. He needed the distraction and after a few days if he didn't find a hunt, maybe he'd head west.

"Don't beat yourself up about this Dean. I think you knew it was going to happen; that Sam was going to try and get out of the life. I saw it and you did too, but you didn't want to admit it." He poured two glasses of whiskey and pushed one in front of Dean.

"Yeah, you're right," Dean huffed picking up the glass and swirling the amber liquid around in it. He looked deep into the bottom of the glass for a moment as memories surfaced and pushed them away. With one quick swallow, he downed the contents and coughed lightly as it burned his throat. What Bobby said was right, Sam wasn't cut out to be a hunter no matter how hard their father pushed him to be. His mind was made up, he'd stay with Bobby for a few days and help him in the garage and then head west. He'd look for any hunts along the way, but he was going to see his brother and clear the air.

He was not cutting him out of his life no matter what their Dad said, and he needed Sam to know that.