Descent

Ahsoka was exhausted. The steps down the Jedi Temple had never seemed quite so long. They were long, of course; Ahsoka had been taught as a child that then entire structure was built over a mountain millennia ago. But she had scaled and descended the side of the Temple hundreds of times. The height was nothing new; knowing she might never return was.

Anakin's anguished face rose to the surface of Ahsoka's thoughts unbidden. She'd told him the truth: this wasn't about him. Throughout this entire ordeal, only her master had unwaveringly stood by her side. Former master. The thought came with a shot of pain somewhere behind her heart. Would he take another padawan? Envy welled within Ahsoka for a moment before logic quelled it. Anakin had always cared too much to be a model Jedi. He parroted the Order's position on attachment and emotion when he wanted to teach Ahsoka, but she saw how much he cared for his troops, watched him mourn Obi-Wan's false death. Ahsoka wasn't dying, but her betrayal would hurt him in ways she couldn't bear to contemplate. He would not replace her, and the council would not push him to do so. A teacher is judged by the merits of their students, and Ahsoka walking away from the order would do nothing to convince Master Windu or Master Mundi that Anakin's unorthodox methods were worth passing on.

The stairs leveled out into a large open space. The first time she'd practiced with her own lightsaber, it had been in this courtyard, under the watchful eyes of Master Yoda. He'd seemed so...perfect back then. A wise, thoughtful answer for even the most difficult questions. No secret could be kept from him, no degree of petulance or failure or stupidity could disturb his unflappable calm. And all that time, the seeds of war were being planted. He, and the rest of the council, had failed. They were supposed to be the keepers of the peace, and they had lost it.

Disappointment and resentment welled up within Ahsoka as she remembered her last two meetings with the Jedi Council. She didn't want to hurt Anakin, but returning to the Order, pretending their supposedly infallible leaders hadn't gone from giving her orders to standing by her execution to praising her as a Jedi worthy of knighthood over the course of a week…no.

Anakin had Obi-Wan, and Rex, and the rest of the 501st…and Padme. He would recover from the wound she was dealing him. With a great effort, Ahsoka pushed her master from her mind. There were more immediate problems.

For nearly fifteen years Ahsoka Tano had called this place home. She supposed she must have lived somewhere before Master Plo had taken her in, but she had no memory of parents or family of any kind, or even the name of the planet. Idle curiosity had long since taught her that the Togrutan homeworld was on Shili, but nearly as many of her species lived on the colony on Kiros, and again as many lived across the galaxy; her parents could be on Nar Shadaa, Naboo, Alderaan, here on Coruscant, or a hundred other planets friendly to outsiders. And even if by some miracle she happened across her family, how could she possibly recognize them? No, her family must remain a mystery.

And what of friends? Perhaps they could—

Barriss.

Ahsoka came to a complete stop in the middle of the courtyard. Her breath hitched, fingernails dug violently into arms as she tried to maintain control. Ahsoka had been a Jedi her entire life. She had practiced for years how to temper and ignore her emotions. She knew how to deal with anger, jealousy, envy, sorrow desire, joy, and mirth. Betrayal was a new challenge. With an effort, she shoved the thought of her former friend to the back of her mind to be dealt with later. She forced one foot in front of the other.

Ahsoka had helped many people in the past couple years. Many of them would be happy to give Ahsoka a home, at least temporarily. Her first thought was of Padme, but she quickly discarded the option. Padme was a good friend and perhaps the best the Senate had to offer, but she and Anakin were close. Very close.

Lux Bonteri…that situation is just a well of even more confusion. Pleasant confusion, sure. But she had too much to sort out in her life as it was. Pass.

Ahsoka and Chewbacca had once saved each other on the Trandoshan moon. Wookies held those who took the time to learn Shyriiwook in high regard; they'd take her in if she could get to Kashyyk. Then again, Kashyyyk was a war zone and half a galaxy away. Ahsoka wondered if she had the credits to get off planet. She'd never been very good with money; the Jedi Order was well-funded and all her basic necessities had always been provided for her. Without their support, Ahsoka didn't know where the next meal might come from, and she imagined interplanetary travel must be expensive.

So leaving Coruscant was out. Who else did she know here?

Riyo.

More steps. Ahsoka continued her descent.

Riyo Chuchi was the senator to Pantora, a good friend, and still owed Ahsoka for the incident with her family and the Trade Federation. And the fact that Riyu was such a well-connected individual would ensure that Ahsoka would be able to keep an eye and an ear on galactic politics. So if something important happened—

Ahsoka stopped. What if something important happened?

She sat down.

Would she step back into the fight? Could she? Could she stay away? If she did get back in the fight, what would the order do? Would they trust her to do the right thing, or hunt her down like a fallen Jedi? Was she a fallen Jedi?

Ahsoka reached up to hold her montrals, trying to quiet the thoughts in her mind. She stood up. For now, the next step would be enough. She needed time to think. Alone. And she needed shelter and food. A simple job could supply her with that much.

Ahsoka stood. She'd visit her room; she had a few credits there, probably enough for the next few meals. She didn't have much else. A few changes of clothes, better for sale than for fashion. Some writing supplies she'd never touched; the Jedi code encouraged a sort of scholarliness that had never interested Ahsoka even before wartime. And…her lightsaber. The clones had recovered the shoto she'd lost running from them, and the council had restored it to her when she'd been found innocent. Ahsoka had stopped carrying it, but she wouldn't leave it behind either. That was simple practicality; she'd made as many enemies in the galaxy as friends, perhaps more. Reclaiming her green saber should be a priority as well. Revisiting level 1315 was repugnant, but letting a lightsaber loose in Coruscant's underground was asking for trouble.

An hour later, Ahsoka Tano finished her descent from the Jedi Temple.