It's been way too long since I updated this! Anyway, enjoy a fourth chapter!

The First Kill

Sunlight bathed the training grounds, although fall was well on. He dragged in a ragged breath as Aster turned her wide eyes to him. Disappointment and shame registered on her face as she caught sight of Hikaru's expression. "I'm sorry niisan..." She said softly, her frown widening.

Hikaru forced a smile for her. "No- you don't have anything to be sorry for." If anything it's me who should be apologizing... As she turned back to the wooden post he grimaced. There were bad students, and then there was his sister. Regret filled him as he realized how caught up he'd been in duties as a chunin. I should have made more of an effort to help her train... "Use your wrist," he commented, trying to keep his voice gentle. He'd already told her this, but she never failed to throw shuriken with her shoulder.

With an affirmative nod in his direction, Aster reset her stance. Taking an unnecessary step back, she tossed her whole body into the throw. Movement began in her heel and rippled through her, ending with the wrist that he had told her to isolate. Hikaru winced, shifting the blame for her faults to himself almost immediately. I should have been more specific. He watched the four-pointed shuriken fly through the air. It arced high and then came down low sharply. The force of her whip-like motion stuck it deep into the dirt with a loud thud.

"It's alright," Hikaru told her quickly. Aster hung her head. "You just need to keep practicing." He shot her a comforting smile.

She shook her head. "It's hopeless niisan..." She bit her lip, speaking thickly. Hikaru's stomach sank. Oh no... Please, don't let her start crying... I can't think of what to do next...!"I can't do it..." Her eyes were turning red as she thought of the consequences of what was to come. "I can't make the genin test... I'm going to be stuck at the academy forever..."

"Yes you can." It was nearly an order as he fought to stave off her tears. "You can do anything you put your mind to, I promise." He reached out, setting a hand on Aster's shoulder.

"No, niisan-"

"Enough!" Aster jumped as he turned her to face him. "You can do it. If there's one thing I want you to learn today, it's not to give up." The determination in his eyes was threatening as she tried to come to terms with the faith he put in her. "You're strong, and I want you to know that."

She stared at him, letting the words take effect. Slowly, they sank in. It was hard to believe she could be capable, but amazingly, Hikaru appeared to be sure of her. Niisan is never wrong... Does...? The thought was a double-edged sword, cutting through her uncertainty and security at the same time. Does... Does that mean... I am strong?

The classroom was bustling as the students tried to expend their childish energy before the bell. Idate scanned the benches, looking for a seat. Up near the back he spotted another child that he swore could have been his twin. Stern frown hiding his anxiety, he started up the steps to sit next to him, hopes high for a friend. Suddenly a chorus of girlish shrieks broke out behind him. Before he could turn, he was trampled by wild eyed classmates. He stumbled in their ranks, falling on a desktop. By the time he regained himself, all seats around his 'friend-to-be' had been occupied by cooing girls.

Astonished and unabashed, he gawked as they gathered around him. Even more perplexing was the way the other boy glared and remained silent through the assault. Abruptly, anger reared its head within him. It was all too easy too see how little he thought of his admirers. Somewhere the irony provoked his spite. With one last disdainful glance, he chose a seat near the front and close to the door.

Her own blue eyes stared back in the bedroom's wood-framed mirror and her silver hair fell like a waterfall well past her shoulders. Her body was carved and beautiful, despite having born three children. She frowned. Two sons and daughter to call her own, but what were they to her really? The first was an accomplishment, the third a shadow, and the second was a prime target for her frustrations. It was cruel, unfair, and she knew it.

The thoughts drifted. Children- what were they supposed to mean to a mother? Didn't other women see them as gifts, as burdens of love? She frowned at her reflection. Love was an uncertain feeling, something lost and not to be regained. Obviously, she had to have loved her husband, the father of her children. But what had happened to that? Words were rarely exchanged between them now, and what little they shared was painful and sharp. The only escape was in hiding and her bottle. At least then the suffering could be forgotten, whether from black outs or mental blocks was uncertain.

She traced the shape of her face in the mirror. It was exactly as her daughter's, round and elegant. The circles under her eyes darkened. She saw the bruises on Aster, and she knew where they came from. The way she took them made her heart break, and at the same time infuriated her. A child should cry at physical pain, especially a young girl. Hers only sat and absorbed the abuse in silence. It was words and yells that brought her to tears, and now even those were fading and becoming quiet.

A frown shaped her lips now and she thought of her first born. She had loved him once, she could nearly remember it. He was a beautiful baby, and he had once meant much more to her. It amazed her to realize how detached from him she'd become. He was a family prodigy, not noteworthy outside their clan, but outstanding beyond the rest. She watched him learn to hate her and what she'd become. He was trying to shield his siblings, and she knew it. But the detestable blackness inside her that drunkenness incited did not care about him or his intentions. Hikaru was no longer a son, but a respectable adversary.

As she turned away, she watched her hair dance about her. It was a rare color, but two of her children had inherited it. She eyed it momentarily, twirling a handful. Idate had been an accident, she'd never wanted him, and somewhere she believed Aster felt the same. It was clear in the way the two fought, and she believed her youngest knew the truth of both their hearts.

She staggered away from the mirror, letting her hair slip through her fingers. An ache was beginning in her chest. There was only one place of safety. Her hands trembled as she fumbled with the cabinet, groping for her escape. Her fingertips brushed the glass and something akin to relief filled her as she pulled down the bottle.

Three genin stared back at him as Hikaru met them blankly. I hope Aster'll be alright... Home by herself with mother... Dread knotted in his chest. I wish I had more time with her... Damn these missions...

"Sir," One of them spoke firmly, staring at him with pointed intent. "The mission?"

Hikaru's eyes widened as he came back to reality. "Yes," he answered quickly, frowning at the boy's impatience. "This is simply an upkeep mission. There was word of an attempted invasion by a small starving town on our outskirts." He shook his head, looking over his recruit's indifferent masks. "We are merely making sure that they were untrue. And in the off chance there is some merit to the attack, we will preempt it without haste."

The others nodded, obedient, but he caught a flash of something furtive in the one that had spoken to him earlier. "Yes?" It was almost as if the boy had expected the inquiry, and he continued with it fluidly.

"You said the town was starving?" Black eyes narrowed and his face was set.

Crossing his arms, Hikaru resized the boy. "Who are you?"

There was brief hesitance before he was given a respectful answer. "Uchiha Itachi, sir," came the quiet reply.

"Alright," He stepped up to him, mulling over the Uchiha. "I heard about you." And that was all that needed to be said. Bowing his head just enough to hide his face, Itachi fell silent. After a moment he addressed the question posed by him earlier. "Yes, the town is, quite literally, starving."

"Are they of the Fire country?" The speed in which he shot back was nearly disrespectful and irritated Hikaru.

"Yes."

As if he hadn't already crossed an invisible line of conduct, the Uchiha spent a moment in uncertain deliberation. "Then... If they are of the Fire country, and starving... And we are of the Fire country," He paused, looking to Hikaru for understanding of his thought process and found only patient anticipation. "Shouldn't we aid them instead of fending them off?"

"We have orders, this is a mission." Hikaru met the other's solemn gaze. He's so young... I doubt he understands... "As shinobi under Hokage-sama, we obey orders without question." Itachi nodded. "If you think we should help them instead of safe-guarding ourselves, take it up with the Hokage." He watched as the other's eyes widened. There was momentary hurt and then a flash of disgust.

Hikaru waved his arm, sending them out. The other two disappeared quickly. Before Itachi could escape him, Hikaru pulled him aside. The Uchiha gave him an incredulous look that quickly turned to revulsion. "Yes?"

"Hey," Hikaru smiled as he watched Itachi's demeanor change to confusion. "I'm sorry if what I told you seems cold. We have orders, and the decisions are not ours to make." Shame fell over the Uchiha boy. "I'm sorry." Sympathy colored him.

"Please, sir," He was caught off guard by the formal way Itachi addressed him. "I already understand what you told me." There was a pause, a hitch in his breath and Hikaru held his eyes, conveying the safety of openness. Young and naive, he took the bait. Lowering his voice, Itachi squirmed under the other's hand. "It's just... I find it all very..." He paused, looking for an appropriate word. "... I find it all very... Very cruel..."

Hikaru sighed. "There are many cruel things in this world, be glad that you know so little of them." He saw Itachi's eyes go wide as he paled. This mission was going to a learning experience for the young Uchiha, in more ways than one. "Let's go."

The recess call went out and Idate set his face in a grim scowl. The school was boring and tedious, the other children avoided him like a plague, and he had none of the previous knowledge expected from the teacher. The first hour of class had been spent in a confused daze, but now frustration had the better of him. He smirked as they exited to the play ground. The man watching them was lax, while the kids flooded out, he realized it was the opportune time for his plan. With a triumphant grin, he ducked off to the side, slipping away from the group and dashing around the back of the school. Adrenaline rushed through him and he climbed the wall quickly. Suckers!

His feet made a satisfying thud on the other side of the stucco wall. The air seemed lighter here. It even smells better outside those dumb classrooms! He did not waste time for fear of being caught. Grinning from ear to ear, Idate dashed off into the surrounding foliage.

Once last glance confirmed it, she was alone. Aster breathed a sigh of relief. She'd made it in one piece to the training grounds. With the test coming, they had extra time out of class for personal practice, and she planned to use it. Even though she already knew she was safe, she checked her surroundings again. Her father was asleep at the moment, and she had seen her mother reaching back into the cabinet. The consequences of being caught out now would be tenfold what they were she didn't have the bottle, but it was worth whatever it took to pass the test. Steadying herself, Aster reached into the shuriken holster. Target practice... C'mon! If niisan thinks you can do it- you can do anything! There was a shuffling sound behind her.

Idate stepped into the clearing. "Aster?!" He stared.

Her eyes went wide. "I-Idate?" She was ready to scold him, he was supposed to be in class, but suddenly she wanted to get along with him, at any cost. Gathering herself she forced a smirk. "Whatcha doing?"

Surprise washed over him. A sharp rebuking had been expected, instead he was met with edgy tolerance. Testing the waters, he dived in full force. "Ditching school."

He watched Aster tense as she fought the urge to reprimand him. "Oh." As if returning the jibe, she laughed. "Well, I'm ditching Mom," horror spread through him, "looks like we're doing the same thing, more or less." She smiled and he felt sick.

"D-ditching Mom?" Idate choked. Aster turned away from him now, and the tables turned. "Nee-chan! Do you have any idea what you just said?!"

There was a brief silence as she tried her aim at the post across the clearing. To both of their astonishment, it hit the target close to the center. "Yes." She answered leadenly. "I know exactly what I said." Aster slipped out another shuriken. "And I know exactly what the consequences are." Emerald eyes went wide as she hit the board dead center.

Hikaru frowned, looking over his youngest charge. Itachi refused to meet his eyes and he couldn't find it himself to force praise upon the child. He had been granted an amazing subordinate, but that appeared to be its own curse.

They had arrived at the town to find it empty. Hikaru had sensed something the wrong the moment they'd stepped into the rundown avenues. The houses were more shacks and all seemed to be crumbling, but the community was obviously unabandoned. Deciding there was more to the intelligence they had gotten than originally perceived, he had made to pull his team out. That was when they had been ambushed.

He had been prepared to defend his team, but instead, the Uchiha had risen to the occasion and fought for them all. Hikaru was ashamed to admit that he only stared in complete awe as the boy tore down their attackers without hesitation.

Now Hikaru turned to survey the scene behind them. It was the villagers themselves who had come after them. The guilt over Itachi was something tangible and he couldn't stand it much longer. The one who had pleaded to salvage the town and its people was the one to bring them down. Hikaru knelt down examining fallen. These people are… so weak… His fingers easily circled wrists, and the minor defensive attacks he'd watched the Uchiha deliver had been enough to put a few out of their misery. We need someone with more authority in here…

Standing, he looked over the other accompaniments. "Go and report to the Hokage," All three nodded and Itachi appeared ready to wretch. "Uchiha Itachi, you stay." Hikaru watched his eyes turn dead and his face begged to leave. "I want you here with me."

"Yes, sir." He answered quietly, sounding as terrorified as he looked. The other two were gone quickly and Itachi approached him slowly.

Hikaru knelt down to his level. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, sir." Itachi met his eyes, desperate to convince of him of his wellness.

The ploy failed. "Really?" Hikaru gave him a wry grin that held no humor. "Then please, tell me why you look ready to vomit?"

He went paler, if such a thing was possible, and his mouth fell open. "W-what?" Itachi stuttered, unused to such direct and warm attention from a superior. He fumbled, looking for a formal reply that he could give. None was to be found. "I am not ready to vomit," Itachi muttered disdainfully.

The conversation once again turned solemn as he gazed back over his shoulder. "Itachi," The other jumped slightly, uncomfortable at the way his captain used his first name. "Some of those people are dead."

"I…" He struggled with the sentence for a moment. "I… I killed them…"

Hikaru held his eyes. "Yes." Although he had been exaggerating earlier about the Uchiha's condition, it looked as though he really was going to heave now. "Have you seen death before?"

To his surprise Itachi responded evenly. "Yes… I have." There was weight in the sentence and he resized the boy's age. He was… four? During the war?

"Have you killed before?"

This time he was given the answer he expected. "…no…"

He sighed. I suppose there has to be first time for everything… The boy recoiled now from his touch as the brief skirmish replayed itself in his mind. Hikaru tugged him back. "It's not your fault, you know."

Itachi glared at him. "Not my fault?" he scoffed. "It's all my fault…"

"No," Hikaru shook his head. "Those people were weak, and they attacked you. None of the blame for this should fall on you, especially as a genin."

There was a pause as anger and guilt receded behind a placid mask. "Is lack of rank to be used as excuse for my blunder?" The question was an ill disguised jab.

The other handled it smoothly. "It wasn't a 'blunder', merely a difference in strength and lack of experience. I doubt anyone here expected you to be able to do what you did."

"Hmph," Itachi refused to look at him now. Sorrow twisted in his stomach and he wanted nothing more than to leave. I'm pathetic… To the point I can't even control myself… No 'difference in strength' should result in death… The train of thoughts was spiraling, and becoming increasingly menacing. He broke it off. "I want to leave."

Hikaru was ready to refuse the request, but back-up had arrived. Two anbu stared at them through black eyeholes. He stood, but kept his hand on Itachi's shoulder, somehow needing to feel that he was securely in charge of him.

"You may leave," one of them told him. Hikaru nodded, using a swift teleportation jutsu for himself and Itachi. They were in front of the village gates and the sun was now setting.

The elder looked down on him, still not wanting to release his loose hold. "Do you want me to take you home?"

"No," Itachi slipped away from him and took a few extra steps back, ensuring distance. "I can handle myself."

"I saw that," Hikaru said slowly. The other's cringe was barely notable. He continued, pinning the Uchiha with a steady gaze. "But just because you can doesn't mean you should. Am I understood?"

With one glance over his shoulder Itachi answered profoundly, "Perfectly." And then he was gone, dashing through the gates into the empty boulevards.

Aster straightened up, pocketing the last of her shuriken. She smiled over her shoulder and Idate struggled to return it. Sunlight was barely reaching them now, and there was no choice but to leave.

"Let's go," she told him softly. Idate swallowed thickly and she read his fears in his eyes. To comfort them both she added, "Maybe Niisan will be home…"

He bobbed his head, standing obediently. "Maybe…"

Well... Now we get to see a bit of mom's PoV... somewhere else in the village little Itachi is doing some growing and Idate has a gotten a taste of the force that is Uchiha Sasuke. Aster remains in her own bubble, perhaps for the better. Poor Hikaru is watching all this, and as for the mysterious father of my ocs... well... where is he anyway?

I must add on to this... PlEaSe ReViEw