To The Begging I Will Go

by TeaLeaves1234

"She could see the horses now, their eyes rolling wildly, foaming at the mouth, and the sweat sliding off their neck. Too close. They were too close! She didn't want to do this. How could she do this? Even worse...she was doing it alone." GIME,10th walker, slow burn Legolas/OC, slight Outlander crossover. More info in the Author's Note. Read and Review

21. REVAMPED 21

A/N: This is going to be a loooooong chapter ya'll, so get comfy! It is also very dialogue heavy because there will be a lot of explanation into what Kate is and a bit of history, and most answers to your questions will be revealed here but some won't, and the those that haven't been answered here will be revealed later. Gotta keep some secrets, right? Just a warning to you, but other than that...please enjoy this long overdue chapter!

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"Things are transformed one into another according to necessity, and render justice to one another according to the order of time.

-Anaximander (610BC-546 BCE)

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As soon as they were all safely back in Edoras, Kate dismounted her horse with far more agility that she believed herself capable of at that moment, and handed the reins of her horse back to the stable hand. With a quick thank you she hurried past the stalls before anyone would notice her absence.

"And where, pray tell, are you off to Ms. Mackenzie?" Gandalf asked, dismounting Shadowfax. "I assume you have not forgotten our impending appointment?"

Kate shut her eyes slowly, letting out a low exhale of breath. She had not forgotten, obviously, but she had hoped he had.

"I wanted to get cleaned up a bit." She explained. "It's been a few days…better to give and receive bad news with a clean face."

"Indeed." The wizard replied, stroking the horse as he appraised her. "I imagine you're eager to check in on the infirmary as well."

"I'd like to, yes, if that's all right. I assume we're not crunched for time, are we?"

"There is some time yet. Very well. And when you see Nestaron would you ask him to join us?"

"Why?" Kate probed, more forcefully then she intended, and after a raised eyebrow from Gandalf, gave a further explanation. "I'd really rather he not be there, if it's all the same." It was bad enough everyone else was going to be privy to her public shaming, she most certainly did not want Nestaron to be there too!

"Be that as it may, Nestaron has been around far longer than you or I and I would value his opinion on the matter. He may yet have some insights that we do not. You will need his wisdom."

Kate frowned openly, sending a pleading look to Aragorn who simply shrugged, offering no help in the matter. Gandalf had not meant this as a request, regardless of how he had phrased it.

"Fine." Came Kate's clipped reply and she stalked off as best she could toward her desired destination. In all honestly, Kate knew she had no right to be bothered by the whole thing.

Gandalf and the others hadn't given her any grief about what Saruman had said, nor did they probe her about the subject of the meeting Gandalf had asked for upon their return. Quite frankly, this was all her fault…if she didn't want to deal with the fall out she should have handled it better, she knew this, but she had to wonder how else it might have been handled?

She did the best that she knew how to do at the time. If Gandalf wanted her to react better than he shouldn't have hidden so much from her; and she knew there was so much he and others had kept from her!

Waves of anger rolled over her and she clambered up the stairs and into the hall. She hated that she felt she had been lied to this whole time! How was it that Saruman and Gandalf knew more about what she could do, or couldn't do? How did Kedron? Why was it that everyone else seemed to have such an intimate awareness of her gifts and abilities?

Get a grip of your pride, Kate! She scolded to herself as she passed through the large doors. It won't get you your answers any faster.

It wouldn't, of course, but anger was her default. It was a lot easier to feel angrier about a situation than to admit that she really felt hurt, lied to, useless, and incompetent. With a relenting grumble, she tucked those thoughts away for another time, turning her attentions to something she could much more easily address.

Admittedly, she was eager to check on those patients that she and others had cared for at Helm's Deep, and remained hopeful that they would progress as well as expected. There was one patient in particular she was hoping to see.

After getting directions from a helpful guard, Kate easily made her way to the infirmary, where only about twenty or so patients remained.

"Nestaron!" Kate called out in relief to the Elf, who gave a curt nod and waved her over.

"I am afraid you will not have much to do here at the present moment." Nestaron commented. "I am sending several back to recover in their homes. Though I suppose you can work on organizing those supplies. I will leave them with you."

"Oh, well thank you. Did we lose anyone on the journey over?"

"Two perished, but that could not be helped. They would not have made it even if they had stayed at Helm's Deep." Kate nodded, lips set into a hard line, not happy about losing anyone. Her eyes scanned the rows of resting individuals and her frown deepened when she noticed Bergil was not there. Had he not survived? Had he gotten an infection? Where was he? "The boy has been allowed to leave. His arm is healing well enough, I saw no reason to keep him further." Nestaron said, answering her unspoken question.

"Right, of course. That is reasonable." She replied, crossing her arms and leaning against the table.

"He is well, Kate. The Blacksmith who he apprentices for came to visit him and is willing to keep him under his tutelage, so long as he can keep up. I believe him to be an honorable man, he will care for him, do not worry. Before he left they were talking quite excitedly about how they could continue his work one handed." Nestaron said, his voice softening at the memory.

Kate let out a loud sigh of relief, nodding again as the worry finally subsided. Bergil will be alright. He'll be taken care of that is good, one problem down!

"Well, good. That is good…he'll need money though. He has to eat." She mused aloud as she assessed a man across the room moving to stand up from his bed. Satisfied that he seemed to be able to lift himself steadily enough, Kate turned back to Nestaron, an idea forming in her mind. "Hey, what ever happened to that belt that Bergil had as a tourniquet?"

Nestaron stiffened, his back turned to her as carefully measured out a powdered substance.

"Why?"

"Oh, well, I was just wondering…I thought maybe we could melt it down into some coins or something, or sell it. Bergil could use the money, it just seemed like a good idea. Oh, you don't think that's a good idea? It's dishonest, isn't it? It was just an idea, I mean what else would anyone do with it and it's better that Bergil gets it than someone else. Right?" Nestaron continued his work as Kate rambled, concern gripping his every breath.

"Selling the belt would be no more dishonest than its owner." He muttered under his breath, but Kate had not noticed. "No, I have held onto it. You are free to do with it as you like. I assume Kedron will not be back for it?" Kate snorted.

"No, he's already added it to my list of debts I'm sure but I-" She paused as Nestaron whirled around to face her, horror written so plainly on his face that it scared Kate more than she wanted to admit. She hadn't realized what she had been saying! Nestaron said the name so easily, a name they both evidently knew well she didn't even stop to think! Her hand flew to her mouth as she stared at Nestaron. "You know?" She whispered frightfully.

"Please tell me you are not in league with-with him! Please, tell me you are not so foolish, so gullible!" He hissed. Nestaron shook his head and horror gave way to grief and rage as the ancient Elf looked down at the human.

"I-I, how do you know him?" She breathed, barely able to form words. Nestaron let out a dour laugh, looking away from the woman.

"Well, which one is it? Are you foolish or gullible? Or are you both?" He baked, packing away the medicines with barely controlled rage. "Does Legolas know?"

"N-no, no I…I haven't told anyone."

"So, stupid then, is it?" He scoffed, barking orders to Sudryl and Elaron.

"I am not stupid! I didn't know, he just showed up! I don't know what he wants, then he started saving my life and telling me I was indebted to him! It wasn't my fault." Kate yelled, her breath coming out in short gasps. "I wanted him to leave me alone!"

"No, of course it is no fault of yours! Why would a great Traveler such as yourself have to adhere to the very mandates they must enforce!? That would be absurd!" He bit back mockingly, too incensed to care how he sounded. "Oh, do not look so confused, I knew you for a Traveler the moment I laid eyes on you!"

"How?! How in the world would you even know that? You're a healer! And I really wish everyone would just stop with this Traveler shit already!" Kate growled out.

"Excuse me?" Nestaron turned back to her, his eyes narrowing and tone turning cold, daring her to continue. As often as Kate had seen his foul moods before, she had to admit this was far more intimidating than any other, but she wouldn't back down. Not this time.

"You, Gandalf, Saruman, Kedron! You all keeping talking about how I am this Traveler or whatever, like it's supposed to hold some sort of weight for me, but it doesn't! I don't know what it means, no one will tell me!" Kate shouted back, hating how irrational and confused she sounded. "Also, I mean, come on, are we married to that name? It's ridiculous! 'The Traveler!'. That name sounds like I'm supposed to be wearing an indecent amount of spandex and have a spunky sidekick!"

"Keep your voice down!" Nestaron hissed, grabbing hold of her and pulling her out of the infirmary. "There are not many who would offer you as warm a welcome as you have been given, should they discover what you are. Travelers are not often looked upon favorably."

"Well, I didn't know that either! It would be nice if someone would let me into the secret club! Do I need to know the super-secret password or something? What is it? Hmm let guess 'Wanderlust'? 'Passport'? 'American Airlines'?!"

"Do not use our friendship as an excuse to freely mock me! Not about this. You cannot expect me to believe you do not know!" He snapped angrily, glaring down at her as he tried to pry out some sort of honesty from the woman. Then suddenly it dawned on him that she actually must not have known…if she had, she never would have allowed herself to become indebted to Kedron! "You truly have no idea, do you?" He asked, his features suddenly changing to something akin to pity and Kate's demeanor hardened. She didn't want him to look at her like that, she didn't want anyone to look at her like that!

"No, I told you! And I'd really like to get some answers soon, thanks! I assume you know a hell of a lot more about this than I do, which I guess is why Gandalf had me ask if you would come to this meeting. I…have to tell him some things… and I guess we'll be inviting the whole Motely Crue to join us."

Nestaron hummed in agreement as he reassessed the woman that by all reason he had grown quite fond of; Fond enough that her lack of understanding and training had left him enraged! Questions ran through his mind at break-neck speed, weaving worry and fear into the very fiber of his being!

How had she not been trained? Had her guardians known they would have left her open to such dangers when they refused to teach her? Had they known they risked her life in exchange for her ignorance, or a fate even worse? Or did they simply not care?

How had she lived through the years of her life without feeling the burden of the position? How had she not been affected by it? Or had she always been, and had simply grown a tolerance to it?

"Well," Nestaron started, straightening himself and schooling his features "I suppose we should hear what Mithrandir has to say. Today you will have your answers, Kate."

"God, I hope so." She breathed.

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Kate sat quietly under the intense scrutiny of the group sitting around her, feeling each and every eye boring into her as she recounted the events of her arrival. She had been finished for quite some time now, but she wouldn't meet their gaze.

She couldn't. Not yet.

Instead she focused her attentions on the small ant crawling across the floor. She watched it for several minutes, crawling across the table top while everyone seemed to digest all she had said. She felt an odd sense of kinship as she watched the ant, who was now desperately trying lift a crumb of bread that seemed far too large for its body.

"Is that all?" Gandalf asked, finally breaking the heavy silence. Kate nodded mutely, watching the ant abandon its original plan, and instead circle the desired object in frustration. "Is that truly all, Ms. Mackenzie? You've left nothing out?" The wizard probed

"As much as I can remember." Kate replied with an aggravated sigh, still obstinately refusing to look up, but she had told the truth. She truly had told all of them everything, from her arrival here, to each and every place that had an opening and a portal, Boromir, Kedron's dramatic introduction, her little science experiment in the Glittering Caves and all the subsequent events that followed. She left no detail out, and as much as it shamed her she had to admit there was some relief to getting it all out in the open and off her chest.

"My, my…you have been busy." Gandalf mused, prepping his pipe as he talked. Clearly the wizard was in need of the mollifying effect of pipe weed.

"Bilbo said he met a Traveler once…I never believed him." Merry whispered in awe. And yet you believed him when he told you he talked to a Dragon?! Kate fumed. Am I really that much of myth?

"And you have never met this…Kedron, prior to your arrival here? Not even in your own world?"

"Nope. I've never met him. I've no idea who he is." Kate sighed, still staring at the floor. The ant had another join him and the two ants now worked in unison to bring the crumb back to their home.

She watched the creatures scurry across the floor, only half listening to the others talking around her, very pleased that the ant seemed to have succeeded in its endeavor thus far.

Obviously, she realized, she must be exhausted if she were so emotionally invested in the lives on ants. That, or she had deeply rooted avoidance issues.

"Kate Mackenzie, this is hardly the time to daydream!" Gandalf barked, bringing her back to the conversation and finally forcing her to meet his gaze. "Have you heard a word I have said?"

"No, I'm sorry, I didn't." She admitted, sitting up in her seat and leaning forward. "If you wouldn't mind repeating the question."

"Am I to assume Kedron has your Rings?"

"He has one, I gave…Boromir the other." She answered, throat catching on the name of her fallen friend. A friend who might not be as fallen as she was led to believe!

"Those were no trinkets the Lady gave to you, Kate." Nestaron chided. "You should have handled them with a little more care."

"Um, excuse me," Kate started, cocking her head to one side in annoyance. "I did handle the with care. I was told that those rings were to mute the effects of whatever standing stones I run into because of the stabilizing effects of the iridium. When Boromir needed help, I gave one to him, because it was obviously a new experience to him and I'd been through it before. I could handle it with one ring. The other was stolen from me. I did handle them with care, and now they are gone. It sucks, but it's just jewelry."

"They were certainly not just jewelry! They were forged for Travelers by Celebrimbor himself, there are no others like them!" Nestaron shouted incredulously, "Other Travelers before you have managed to hold on to those very rings for hundreds of years and you manage to lose both of them in a few short months?! Mithrandir how could you have allowed her to remain here without telling her anything at all? Are you not also to blame for her ignorance?"

The fellowships attention turned to the wizard who seemed more or less, nonplussed by such a question.

"My intention was not to leave the woman in the dark! When I learned of the existence of another Traveler I set out to find her!" The wizard defended. "After I discovered who her mother was, and her father's intention to send her forward in time I bade him to send the child back with me! So that she might live out a life with her mother's kin and be brought up with the knowledge and skill befitting her position!"

"What? You wanted to bring me here? You told my father, you talked to my father? He agreed to this?" Kate asked suddenly. The wizards face softened a touch and he nodded. "He told me it was your decision to have me sent away? That I should be sent somewhere to stay hidden. H-he never told me you were going to bring me here."

"That was my intention, yes. To his credit, your father felt he was doing the right thing when he led me to believe he would send you back with me. I left after our conversation, believing he fully understood the gravity of the situation, and he promised that you would be ready by dawn…but when morning came your father had spirited you away, along with your aunt to hide. He did not trust that I could keep you safe, I do not fault him for that, but it was quite the vexation at the time!"

"I can imagine." Kate muttered. 'Did you try to find us?"

"I did...but by the time I had found your last whereabouts you had already boarded the ship to your Scotland. I knew that you and your Aunt would go through." Gandalf added. "I could not possibly know to where, or when! It had taken more magic and all the spell knowledge I had to find you the first time, I did not have the strength in me to continue the search. I had hoped that you would be safe, but I could not leave such a thing to chance. The Lady offered to look for you in her mirror now and then, to keep an eye on you should danger come your way."

"All this time…you knew of her existence…Gandalf, why would you not have told me?" Aragorn asked, staring at the wizard with a pained expression. "All this time…"

"And what would you have done, had you known?" Gandalf asked. "I could not have brought her back, nor could you have gone to her. I did not hide her from you to harm you! There are still things I could not reveal then, and things I would not risk revealing, now!"

"Well, I'm here now." Kate spoke, hoping to quell the mutual animosity that was directed toward the wizard. She was irritated but it comforted her to know he had tried to help her...her father too, had tried. People had cared enough to try, and that was worth something to her. "But, if you knew what I was this whole time, why didn't you tell me? You made it seem like I couldn't leave…why would you do that? I still don't even understand what being a Traveler means."

"They are fiction! A myth!" Gimli interrupted with a snarl. Gimli might have believed Travelers were a myth but obviously they were the bad guys in his tales.

"And even if they are real, Kate is nothing like any of the stories we have ever heard." Merry said in agreement. Most everyone had piped in with their two cents by now…everyone but Legolas. Kate's nervously drifted over to the Elf, hoping she would not see any semblance of disgust or disappointment. What she saw was nothing.

Legolas leaned against the wall, arms crossed and face just as impassive as it usually was when he was around so many other, or when he wanted to hide something. Kate noticed he did not look at the others, and he definitely did not look at her. She did her best to not feel hurt over it.

"A Traveler is…a complex creature." Nestaron started, giving everyone a moment to digest this new-found information. The existence of a Traveler was one thing. Having one in your company, a friend, a family member…well that was another thing entirely.

"Creature?" Kate scoffed. "Like a dog? Yea that's nice."

"No, you are very much still human." Nestaron explained with a roll of his eye. "But Travelers are set apart from others in that they have a specific obligation. They are rarely appointed…worlds could go years without them, never needing their aid, but when a Traveler is born it is out of utmost necessity. A herald of doom."

"That sounds… ominous." Kate mocked, but quickly clamped her mouth shut under Gandalf's withering stare. "Sorry, Nestaron. I just…you know I'm not the only one who can do this. You heard that right? My family traveled through time often, my mother did it, this Kedron guy, Gandalf …I'm obviously not the only person who can do this."

"I did not travel because I was able, I did it because I had to. I needed to seek out The Traveler…and it very nearly cost me my life. The Void is a very dangerous place, as I'm sure you well know. Maiar can Travel but only under the blessing of Mandos and Vairë" Gandalf explained. "We do not know of Kedron but as you have explained him, it is safe to assume he is not a Traveler, nor is he permitted to Travel it would seem. Your mother, your family, they were not Travelers, they were merely visitors."

"I'm sorry, what? What is the difference." Kate laughed.

"Visitors are able to do what they can because of their lineage, it is passed down from one generation to another."

"Yea, genetically." Kate nodded. "I get that, I get that my mom couldn't time travel, she could only, go from one world or the other. So, I guess…genetically, somewhere, it makes sense that I could do both. Time from my dad's side, worlds from my mom. Cool. I get that, what I don't get is what makes me 'The Traveler'" She said, miming air quotes around the title.

"Your lineage alone does not make you The Traveler, is that what you are asking?" The wizard asked, and Kate nodded. "Very well then. No, it does not make you a Traveler. It is not known how Travelers came to be, they simply have been. Travelers can be born to any world, at any time, whenever they are needed. Your paternal family and mother are visitors, meaning that they have the gift of travel and are free to use it. Visitors are an inconvenience, an anomoly, but a harmless one. Their visitations cannot and do not affect time or change any significant events that take place in a time or world. They might try, to change history but they do not succeed, and if they do it is because a Traveler made it so.."

"Ok. I guess that makes sense…" She nodded, thinking back to when her great grandparents Claire and Jaime Fraser had tried to stop the Battle of Culloden. They did not succeed, as history would tell, and eventually they ended up being separated for twenty years. "So, most of my family, they are Visitors…and anyone who moves to a different world or time…they are all visitors? And there can be any number of visitors at a time?"

"That is correct."

"So that explains some things…I guess." She said aloud. She wanted to know the how, the why! Genetically, biologically what made that kind of thing possible? But, with great regret, she realized that no one in this world would have those kinds of answers, not yet. She'd have to wait for science to catch up. "So, then what makes a Traveler different? That I can do both? I don't think that is such a big deal."

The wizard shook his head, nodding to Nestaron to take over from there. This irked Kate more than it should have. She thought Nestaron was only a healer, why the hell was he suddenly the oracle for the Traveler nonsense? She had thought she knew Nestaron well enough, but clearly not!

"Yes, a Traveler can do both. They are not restricted to one world or time, as some visitors are, and it is much easier for them to decide where to maneuver, you could say, than it would be for a visitor." Nestaron explained. "The difference…is a Traveler can and will change events if they need to, which makes them dangerous if they should be of ill intent. They are able to return to the past and set an event right, or return to the future and restore order if they must…and if there is a Traveler alive…it usually means that it will be necessary. Travelers, ordinarily, do not interfere with any matter of time. In the ideal scenario, they are not active participant they are simply there to observe until something is set out of place."

"So…Travelers aren't supposed to do anything, just sit back and make sure everything goes to plan…unless something bad happens? So…bad like what?"

Nestaron sighed, thinking back through history to any events that a traveler might have participated in, to illustrate just what a Traveler did.

"It is known among you that the Hobbit, Bilbo, found the One Ring, yes?" He asked, to which Kate nodded in reply, as did the rest of the fellowship. "Well, say that someone else found the Ring? Or Bilbo was never knocked down during the escape from the Goblin caves? As you can imagine the consequences of that would be disastrous. Someone less hardy and far more subjectable to the will of the Ring could have come across it, or a Goblin! The Ring would have ultimately been returned to Sauron and we would not be here to have this conversation now. A Traveler's duty would be to set that event right. They would be born, trained in their skill, and return to that time to ensure that Bilbo be the one to find it. They would also Traveler alongside the defector to ensure that everything happens as it should. They will know if it does not. Then they return to their original time and, after being satisfied with the progression of events, the watch and wait…and prepare for the next defection."

"Oh ok! Kind of like white blood cells!" Kate thought aloud.

"I beg your pardon?"

"They are cells in the body, they cruise around and protect the body from infections and fight off potential foreign invaders, disease or viruses that should not be in the body."

"If that helps you understand…then fine, yes , I suppose I can see the similarity." Nestaron relented and Kate gasped suddenly.

"Oh Kedron! Oh, he's not from this world at all, is he?!" She screeched. "Is he why I'm here? I need to defend the body against him as a foreign invader or something? I need to get him out of here? Fight him off?" At this Legolas's head jerked up, his voice sounding like thunder as it echoed through the room.

"Absolutely not! You will not go near him again!" Kate raised an eyebrow at that, finally meeting his gaze. But, just as quickly as their eyes met he looked away, restraining his voice and emotions again. "He would kill her."

"You do not know that, Legolas." Gandalf spoke, "But you are mistaken, Kate. It is my belief he is of this world just as I am."

"Like a wizard? He's a wizard?" Kate scoffed, to which Gandalf rolled his eyes, grumbling to himself. "I cannot fight a wizard, or Maia or whatever! That can't be why i'm here!"

"No, you cannot." Legolas added.

"Perhaps we should discuss Kedron at a later time?" Gandalf added calmly, but Kate could practically see the wheels turning in his head.

"I do not know if that is why you are here," Nestaron answered truthfully, eyes finally leaving the Elf Prince he loved as his own son and returned to Kate. "Only you can know what your task is, and I would caution you against sharing such information with anyone."

"Ok...Why?" She asked, doing her best to not think about Legolas, or Aragorn. She needed to focus and get answers, and it was hard to do with her loved ones looking like she had just been given a terminal prognosis! For all she knew she had. "Also. Not to sound naïve, but none of this sounds as bad as you made it out to be. I get this is serious, but…it really doesn't seem so awful. It certainly doesn't sound like a reason for everyone to hate me because of it!"

Nestaron let out an irritated sigh and poured himself a glass of the Rohirric Wine, hoping beyond all hope that it did not taste like horse piss. This long drawn out lecture was not his preferred style of teaching, and he's rather not spend his time orating something that this woman should have known all along! Besides all that, such a topic brought up painful memories, things he had not thought of for thousands of years. He would have been happy to never have thought of them again.

"It would be wise not to tell people of your task because should another's desires or assignment not be aligned with yours, they would kill you to ensure their timeline remains unaffected. You are, as I am sure you well know by now, not impervious to injury or death." Oh…I see, Kate thought, blinking her wide eyes in surprise. "And no, I did not say everyone hated Travelers, you have twisted my words. I said that they are generally not well liked." Nestaron continued, sneering down at the drink they called wine and pushing it away in disgust.

"Is that not the same thing, then?" Pippin quipped.

"No, it is not. Most of the populace would not even be aware that a Traveler is in their presence unless they make themselves known, and there are not many who would willingly seek to subject themselves to that kind of persecution. Other Traveler's know one another, and those who practice magic might be able to tell. Some of the Eldar might suspect…" Nestaron explained, his voice holding a bitter edge to it. "Though, there are no longer any Travelers that choose to bind themselves here to Middle-Earth anymore. We have been so long without them that their very existence has passed into myth and legend."

"But why is that? What have they to be afraid of? I should think others would be more afraid of them then they are of us?" Pippin asked. Kate nodded, wordlessly echoing the question to which Nestaron only sighed. This was not a topic he wanted to speak on…but he knew in his heart this day would be full of memories and topics he had not wanted to speak on. Nestaron made himself comfortable, knowing this would be a long tale to tell. Carefully, he schooled his features and began.

"In the first age, a darkness crept into the heart of Sauron. There it festered and grew, and in his mind, he sought to deceive, striving for a power he was not meant to hold. Many Travelers had sought to undermine him in that time, fighting alongside men and elves in their own way.

When Sauron dealt with one, two or three more would arrive. Time and time again the Travelers would arrive, frustrating Sauron's efforts in whatever way they could, sometimes by revealing him to Celebrimbor, and other times by more…creative means. For every three Travelers that left to fight, only one would return, but they could never go back. The Travelers used everything they had to prevent Sauron from completing the goal he had in his mind, and it cost them everything.

During one a particularly difficult …event, Celebrimbor wanted to show his gratitude to the Travelers, to honor the lives lost and help aid them in their future endeavors. He crafted that very set of Iridium rings you were given. Two were created, two were to be used. He explained that two rings encouraged balance, as everything must have a balance.

Life and death, love and hate, a beginning and an end. The creation and usage of these two rings meant only once could Travel…and they would have to do it alone, but they were far more powerful. The rings helped in many ways, to stabilize those portals, make it so they could go back further, or forward as far as they needed without it collapsing around them.

It also allowed them to draw on the powers of other Travelers…it made them stronger. They would right what Sauron set wrong, and when they returned they found that they still had their gifts. So, it was decided amongst them that only one would Travel, when needed, and all others would stay, allowing their strength to be leeched and used to fulfill the purpose of the one.

It worked, for a time, but each timeline the Travelers created in this war created shifts, changed things in the lives of innocents… it could not be helped. Hear me when I say that Travelers would not do such a thing if it could be helped. It is their hope that time would carry on, unmolested, and that those in it carry on through their own fated course in life. It is not their intention to be so overt in what they do, nor do they wish to upset the lives of others if it can be helped; but Sauron would not relent and so the Travelers continued.

Sauron knew that the only way to continue on with his plan was to put an end to the Traveler's here. He began by sowing a deep mistrust of Travelers in the hearts of any he could so that he might go about his plans unhindered.

He managed to have many of the ancient Travelers executed simply because of the fear and strife he had stirred up against them. People do not react kindly toward what they don't understand. But still…some had resisted, some still believed that Travelers had their best intentions at heart.

When the people of Middle Earth no longer listened to Sauron's lies, when they realized what he had deceived them all, they begged for the help of the Travelers, begged them to go back and correct it, but the Travelers refused to act. They abandoned their endeavor and agreed to let time flow as it wished, without their aid. It was a difficult decision…not one made lightly. It goes against the very nature of what Travelers are.

No matter their race, world or origin, Travelers knew their purpose. They understood the gravity of their assignments, so to decide to abandon this world, to leave it to its own devices, was not something they had wanted. The decision was not made based on fear! The stories say it was their own cowardice that drove them into hiding. They say cowardice was the reason many abandoned these shores, in favor of other worlds but that was not so. It was the threat of extinction that caused them to withdraw. It is not cowardice to want to preserve the justice of time itself.

A few deaths among travelers could be ignored, death was expected and often times anticipated. Extinction however, was different. Were the worlds to become bereft of Travelers all together, they would fall into ruin, one by one. Visitors would have been free to alter time and events as they wished, to travel as often as they liked completely unhindered. There would be chaos. They knew they could not allow that to happen, so they hid, fled to other worlds, and those not strong enough faded.

Even as the Nine men fell under Sauron's power one by one, no Traveler made a move to stop him. The Valar implored those that could, to take up their mantle yet again, to come back and do what they were created to do, and even then, they would not act. So, the Valar cursed the Travelers. They removed their protection and blessing and Vairë the Weaver cut her bonds with all Travelers. It was her blessings that made Traveling so easy…and why her breaking that bond makes it so painful to all who travel now. Even to be near a port would cause all Travelers pain, not to mention what could happen should they chose to Travel at all.

The pain was to serve as a constant reminded to Travelers of the needless pain and death that was on their hands when they abandoned Middle-Earth to the will of Sauron. But it also served has a reminder of her mercy, for she could have cut the very thread that allowed them to travel but she didn't. She had hope that one day, Travelers would return to Middle Earth…that they would guard it again, but those who chose to operate here would forever do so alone.

Time flowed on, unhindered and unabated, and eventually it was not enough for Sauron to allow the Travelers to simply hide. He dispatched the Nine to eradicate any and all Travelers they came across. Their numbers dwindled until there were less and less. Those that came here did so unintentionally and even fewer stayed. Those that did had no choice, and even still would not bind themselves here. They did small tasks, to keep themselves in practice but never would ever go back so far as to face Sauron.

It had been so long that the event became a part of Middle Earth, a part of its history and therefore unalterable. Now, it would be the duty of a Traveler to ensure Sauron succeeded in his quest to create the One Ring. For that reason, no Traveler would ever bind themselves to this world again. To them it seemed a great insult, to ignore the great sacrifice they had made in trying to stop Sauron, to now be bound by the Order of Time to ensure his success. It seemed cruel…and it was, perhaps that was another part of the curse, who can say.

Travelers would come, complete small tasks for the sake of preventing an uprising, but they would not bind themselves. It would be hundreds of years until another Traveler bound themselves to the fate of this world…and she did so without even realizing what she had done. Middle Earth had all but been abandoned and Travelers found themselves to be few and far between. So, few, that when it was discovered that another Traveler had been born, a descendant of Middle Earth no less, it was imperative that you be found.

Perhaps you have come to during these dark days because Vairë has plans for you, or because she hopes that you will do what the others would not. Or perhaps it is merely accidental…after all there is much for you to learn, and however extended your mortal life may be you are still just that; mortal. There is only so much you can learn…but you may learn just enough, to turn the tides should things go awry. It may be…we can only hope that you will not have to."

Kate said nothing as she listened, subconsciously rubbing the empty finger where her last remaining ring used to sit, suddenly lamenting its loss. Her mind was reeling with everything she had just heard and she felt the weight of everyone's eyes on her as she fought for the right words to say.

"Is that why The Nine were looking for me? Not just becasue I'm a Traveler they could use, but because I am a Traveler that was bound to Middle Earth, and Sauron didn't want someone like me around?"

"Perhaps, but we have had a considerable advantage in that regard." Gandalf explained, allowing Nestaron a moment to gather himself. "If what you suspected is true, and this Kedron truly was the one to explain to Saruman the limits of your power then he has done us a service! I am quite sure, in his arrogance, Saruman would have passed that information on to Sauron. It would have allayed any fears he might have about you interfering with his plans. He will underestimate you, in the end. Everyone will, and what a great gift it is to be underestimated."

"So, I am not a waste?" She asked, to which Gandalf let out a hardy laugh, his blue eyes twinkling in delight.

"No, not a waste at all, quite the contrary! You are far more valuable a Traveler than anyone has realized. For what you have accomplished thus far on your own…it shows an extraordinary strength." Kate gave a small smile, feeling somewhat better about that.

"So…ok…what exactly can I do?"

"Aside from the usual gifts of travel?" Nestaron asked, indignantly. "How would I know? You would have to test yourself, to train, and it would be far easier to do so with the two iridium rings."

"I'm sorry ok! I didn't know! Besides Kedron said that it would be better to practice without them."

"Better for him perhaps! Do not listen to Kedron, even if it should seem like good council!"

"Nestaron, I don't even know who he is, how the hell was I supposed to know!" Kate shot back, the tension rising between the two companions.

"The less you know of Kedron, the better." He responded. His purposeful ambiguity was really starting to grate on her, and she let it be known with a frustrated shriek.

"That doesn't help me! Oh my God! Every time I think I'm getting somewhere…!" She said, more to herself than anything. She flopped back into her seat, rubbing her temples as she tried to soothe her rising temper. After a few soothing breaths, she decided to move on. "Ok, so… I am…a Traveler for Middle Earth. Alright…that's going to take some getting used to."

"Not just to Middle Earth, but to your world was well." Gandalf added.

"Excuse me?"

"You are of both worlds, due to the circumstances of your birth therefore you may service both worlds, though you have the choice to be bound to one. I assume it is rather taxing to manage two worlds throughout their span of time." Gandalf continued. "Are you understanding?"

Kate's thoughts reached back to that night in Lothlorien, and her initial meeting with the Lady of Light. It wasn't something Kate thought of fondly, and it always struck her as uncharacteristically odd that the she had been so forceful with Kate, demanding that she choose to stay where she was or return home.

Someone that had put forth such an effort to help her get here surely wouldn't have given her that option, would she? And once Kate had chosen…didn't Galadriel say she had been bound to this world?

Oh no.

"Yes, I understand that, but um…in Lothlorien, Galadriel told me that because I chose to stay here that I was now bound to this world and its fate. At the time I didn't think much of it, but now…Nestaron is that what you meant? When you said the first Traveler to bind themselves here in hundreds didn't even realize what they were doing…was that me? Did you mean me?" She asked, her voice getting higher as the Elf ignored her panic and turned to gaze out the window. "No, nope. No, I don't want to be bound here. Obviously, I didn't know what I was doing, so, I'm sure that it cannot be legally binding. No, no thank you. Not to be a jerk but obviously not one else wanted the job for a reason, and I definitely am not qualified for it! We all know this and Galadriel had to have known it!"

"It does not matter now." Nestaron replied evenly.

"What do you mean it doesn't matter? Of course, it freaking matters! Why would she do that? She could read my mind, hear all my thoughts, she had to know I had no idea about any of this! Why would she trick me into a bond that I did not want!"

"And you were tricked into breaking that bond. " He chastised. "The Lady see's much in her mirror. She had told me you had been bound here…I did not know that you had been ignorant of that until today. She had hoped it would protect you. Really, Kate, how could you never have known?"

"Oh, protect me how?! By binding me to a world and shouldering with a responsibility I could not possibly manage? How is that protecting me? Protect me from what?" Kate sniffed.

"From Kedron!" Nestaron yelled, finally whirling around to face the woman. "She had looked in the mirror to find you, as Gandalf had asked and when she looked into your future she saw what Kedron had planned, what he had hoped to accomplish through you! She would not force you to stay here, no, but she would push you to choose, and yes in that decision you were deceived but you were not ready to know the truth, she saw that in your heart! Had you chosen Earth then we would not be here, and you would have been Kedron's pet, milling around and doing his bidding as you wished, but because of the love you have for the people here you chose this world. And with that choice came the binding, and what protection came with it! Had you stayed bound to this world then Kedron would have no use for you! You would have been under the protection of Vairë. Galadriel did try to protect you but that is all for nothing now! The moment he manipulated you into sending that boy away, a boy who by all means was an innocent, you broke that bond! You broke the laws that all Travelers must adhere to, and it matters not that you had no knowledge of them! The boy was no traveler and no visitor, and because you sent him you not only broke the bond to this world but you have made it irreparable! You cut the thread of his life and Vairë cannot allow that to go unpunished!"

"No! This is not my fault! You should have told me! How was I supposed to know I was being manipulated if I didn't even know the truth! I will not be punished for some shit that isn't my fault!" Kate screamed, chest heaving as she glowered at the Elf.

She had never been so angry in all her life and she could not understand why Nestaron was being so hard on her! He had been far more forgiving when she was under his tutelage and she had made plenty of stupid mistakes that were actually her fault. It wasn't as if she had killed Kieran, she hadn't!

She had tried to save Kieran not kill him, so there was no way this was her fault! She had heaved enough guilt on herself over this, she didn't want to take on more guilt than she needed to. Why was he being so unreasonable, and how was it he seemed to have all the answers?

"You should have told her." Aragorn spoke from his seat at the end of the table. "She is right. She could hardly have protected herself if she did not know what she was protecting herself from."

"Yes, you should have told me. And you should have told me about Boromir!" She said, lashing out at her uncle now, who nodded in agreement. Her eyes filled with tears that she furiously wiped away as her gazed turned to Legolas who stood just as stoic as ever. "You should have told me. All of you. What the hell? What happened?"

Kate stared hard at Legolas, waiting for him to turn his eyes to her, begging him to look at her. Did he know about all of this Traveler nonsense? About Boromir? Had he really watched her mourn his loss and said nothing?

Say something! She screamed, the knot in her throat making it impossible to speak. Instead she let out a frustrated groan, pushing the palms of her hands against her eyes to hold back more tears.

She felt as if she was spiraling. This was insane! All of this! How could they be asking her to believe all of this?

Was this even real or was she going crazy? Was this all some wild dream and she'd wake back up in Rivendell, to the sounds of chirping birds and the sun streaming through the trees.

A giggle slipped through her lips and she shook her head while the others exchanged worried glances.

The fact that this could be my dream, and my waking world is in Rivendell is ridiculous. I am insane. I have really lost it.

I have lost my mind.

Shit.

"He's dead though." Kate muttered after a moment. "I saw him…he was hit so many times…vital organs…there's no way he…but Kedron said he was alive…that he is alive…so how is that possible."

"It is high time you stop putting stock into what Kedron says." Nestaron barked.

"Except that he's right this time, isn't he?" She snarled. "So yeah, I get he's bad news but so far he hasn't lied!"

"You are a fool if you believe that." Nestaron said.

"I will accept the blame, if you must place the blame." Her uncle relented, rubbing his hands down his face now, hoping to draw the topic away from this Kedron fellow. They could only deal with one problem at a time. "The Lady Galadriel, Lord Celeborn and I had met many times during our stay in Lothlorien. She is kin to Arwen so it is not such an odd thing. Many nights Celeborn and I simply looked over maps and talked of different routes to take, other nights our conversations were much more lighthearted. Before we left she asked me of your concern for Boromir. She asked me if I believed…that he was equal to Legolas in your heart."

Kate's face warmed instantly to what she was sure was an alarming shade of red and suddenly she was glad that Legolas would not look at her. Their relationship wasn't exactly a secret by now, but still!

"He was just my friend. Did you tell her that? Why would she ask such a thing?"

"I found it odd myself…but of course she had known that you only had thoughts of friendship. She asked me if I believed you would act without thought when it came to saving his life and I said that I believed, without a doubt that you would. I believed you would do so for any member of the fellowship. It seems you cannot help but put yourself in danger so long as you believe you are doing it to help someone you love. She then told me that she looked into the mirror and saw Boromir's death, but also his life…elsewhere. She told me that it was not certain, Boromir's death, but should he try to take the ring from Frodo it would seal his fate, and Gondor's. She told me that should he fall in battle, we would prepare his body and place him in the boat. She warned me that there was a possibility that his body would disappear before our eyes, and should that happen we should send the boat still, with his effects. She also warned that should this happen, it was important I not tell you. But, she did say that all would be well for Boromir, son of Denethor, and for Gondor."

"Aragorn…that doesn't make sense."

"No, it does not, and I admit I found it odd myself, however…that day came far too quickly and when I bid farewell to Boromir of Gondor I did believe him to be dead. Legolas, Gimli and I prepared his body as we would have…and just as the Lady warned, as the boat carried his body down the river…Boromir did disappear…Legolas saw it, for he was too far gone for my eyes to see. All that remained were his effects. Legolas was, naturally, disturbed and so I explained to him, and Gimli what the lady had told me, and that we were not to tell you…that you should believe him to be dead. By all rights Kate, he should be dead!" Aragorn continued shaking his head in frustration. "How was I to know he was not?"

"But you still thought it was a good idea not keep that from me?"

"Galadriel had never been wrong before. Often times her actions may seem odd and her ways strange to us, but there is wisdom to it that we do not see. I would not disregard her council, no matter odd or unbelievable, and I believe if she did not think you were ready to hear the truth at that time, then there was a reason for it. You can place your trust in her."

"Yea, you say that…but I still feel kind of used." Kate muttered, her anger waning. She couldn't really be mad at Aragorn, he had just done what he was told because he believed it was best. Kate knew he'd have her best interest at heart. "I still don't know who I sent him, because I thought he was like me, he had heard the buzzing. After Frodo disappeared, he had told me he heard…he was already so upset …I just wanted to help him. That's why I gave it to him. I figured if it helped me it would help him, but I didn't feel like I sent him. I meant with Kieran I knew, but with Boromir…I wanted to keep him safe, just like Kieran…but…"

"Well, then I assume that is how you sent him." Nestaron said with a loud sigh. "It's possible that your desire to protect your friend was so strong that your power passed from your ring to the one he wore…if you felt unsafe it is possible that you longed for the last place you had felt safe and sent him there. It is only a theory of course…honestly, Kate…you should not have been able to send any of them, especially the boy, not so far away from the stones…Travelers cannot send anyone."

"Oh, because they will be punished, right? Am I cursed now too? How about I gathered all the others who've been cursed and we can form a club, yea? It'll be really great, we'll have team jackets and we can ourselves The Damned." Kate sneered. "Yeah, you've made this whole cursed thing very clear. What's my punishment then? Hot oil or the rack?"

"Do not make light of something you know nothing about! To be cursed by the Valar is not a badge of honor!"

"And what would you know?!" She shouted, angrily slamming her fist against the table. "I'm not cracking a joke because I really think it's funny, it's because I'm terrified! Yes, it was in poor taste, I admit that. Hell, I'll even apologize it if I've offended you, but don't you dare tell me how to feel about this! You don't get to tell me how to feel."

"It does not matter how you feel, Kate. A Traveler does not have the luxury of giving into every feeling. I hope you will learn this before it is too late."

"You know, you seem to know a lot about all of this Traveler stuff for someone who claims to only be a healer."

"I never claimed anything of the sort, you made that assumption on your own." Nestaron said, a bored edge to his voice that further enraged her.

"Oh, come off it! What are you? You owe it to me to at least tell me how you know all of this!"

"Perhaps it is time we break for a short recess." Gandalf declared, standing to his feet abruptly. "Come along everyone, I believe it is time for our dinner."

"Now that is more like it!" Merry exclaimed, tugging up an unusually quiet Pippin from his own chair. Aragorn and Gimli followed suit, albeit with more hesitation than the hobbits, but did so anyway.

"Come, Legolas. You should eat and take some rest for a moment." Aragorn said, and then dropping his voice lower he whispered, ". Allow her to vent her frustrations and come to terms with all of this. We have already borne witness to much that should have been private"

"Thank you, mellon nin, but I will stay." Legolas responded unflinchingly.

"It would be best if you do not, my Lord." Nestaron added, he and Kate still locking eyes and refusing to be the first to look away.

"I am telling you that I will stay." Legolas said again, his voice growing harder. "I will stay here and hear what it is you intend to say to her."

"Do you say that as an order, my Prince." Nestaron asked, his eyes still not leaving Kate's. Legolas had not expected that reaction, and it had obviously pained him to hear it.

"You know I would not do that." He replied, his voice lower but still unwavering. "Not if I felt that I had another choice."

"You are still my Prince, just as your father is my King. You may choose to do whatever you see fit."

Kate heard Legolas's frustrated exhale, and it was her who broke away first from the battle of wills between her and Nestaron. As much as it irritated her to concede she would rather that then Legolas say something he'd regret.

"Just give us a moment Legolas." Kate said, her eyes pleading as she looked to him, begging for him to look back. Why wouldn't he look at her? Was it so horrifying to him what she was?

Just look at me, please.

Without another word Legolas turned on his heel and walked toward the door where the others had exited through earlier, then suddenly he stopped and turned to meet her longing gaze.

"This changes nothing." He said firmly, and with such conviction and surety that Kate's heart clenched in heart chest.

Three words, that was all, and just as quickly as he said them he turned again and left. Her eyes followed him until the door slammed shut, separating them for now, but those three words had meant more to her than anything else.

To her, it was the same as another set of three words, but this…Kate could trust that. 'I love you' was a phrase she had heard so often in her life, in songs and movies, in her school, and from her aunt, that is was easy to take it for granted; to forget its original intention.

But what Legolas had done? That was something should could hold on to, something she could trust and he knew it. She knew this was difficult for him, and a part of her still could not grasp why but she did not mind because it had changed nothing for him…he felt the same. It would change nothing for her either.

"You will be the death of him." Nestaron whispered, shaking her out of her thoughts and bringing her back to the present.

Just like that, whatever balloon of hope she held in her hands floated away. She stared hard at the Elf who in turn gazed at the very door Legolas had just walked out of. He continued to stare, letting out a weary sigh, for so long Kate had wondered if he had forgotten she was even there.

His words stung, more than any he had ever said to her and for a moment Kate had wondered if he had even meant to say them out loud, so lost in reverie he was, it was easy to believe they had just stumbled out…had he really meant them?

Would she be the death of him?

"Nestaron, I know you don't approve…" the Elf scoffed and poured himself another cup of the insufferable wine.

"And what would my approval matter? It is much too late for that." He said, filling a cup for her as well. "No, it's not my approval you need. Not that it matters now. Drink"

"I'm not thirsty." She said as he slid the cup to her and took a seat.

"I can hardly blame you. It seems a shame they should even call this wine." He sniffed. "But nonetheless, it will work the same, for you anyway. You will need it. Drink."

"Nestaron, I don't want crappy wine, I want to know why it is you know so much about all this. I mean, can you even help me? Or did you and Gandalf just want to drop that little A-bomb into my lap and watch me implode? Because I feel like I'm imploding."

"Kate, contrary to what you might believe, I do not have to divulge every aspect of my life to you."

"No, you don't have to but as a friend, who choose to start in on all this, to be a part of this life altering revelation I would hope that you would." She insisted.

"Do you need to be so dramatic, or is that all part of your charm? Is that how you've managed to steal the heart of our beloved Prince?" Kate rolled her eyes and continued, ignoring Nestaron's smirk.

"You know, I understand why Gandalf would know about this, being a wizard and all I'm sure he's got some sort of divine knowledge, right? So why did he insist on your presence? Why isn't he the one giving me all of this history and insider information? I mean, I get you elves are basically ancient but there is no way you know all of it unless you…Oh." She whispered as goosebumps began to form along her skin.

There could really be only one reason why someone like Nestaron knew all of this, knew it so intimately that it sounded like he had been there.

"It is not what you think."

"I think you're a Traveler."

"And you would be wrong."

"But I'm, not am I? You are a Traveler. You can help me. You can teach me, Nestaron, what the hell?! Why didn't you say from the start? You can show me-"

"Nothing! I can show you nothing because I am not a Traveler!" He shouted, cutting her off and slamming the table so hard the wine glasses quaked from the force of it. Nestaron pulled his hand back, and scrambled to calm himself, to quell his anger and soothe his voice. "Not anymore." He added, falling back into the chair, as if the very act of suppressing his emotions exhausted him. Perhaps it did, and so, Kate surmised, he chose not to.

"But you could help me, right?"

Nestaron from across the table, slumped in his chair and twirling the wine in his cup slowly, glanced at Kate as if she were a child who had just asked him to play with her. She watched him consider her request, the answers dancing around in his mind just as the wine in his glass.

For far too long he regarded her in this manner, and Kate did her best not to squirm under the intense scrutiny. When his honey colored gaze proved too much, Kate relented and grabbed her own glance, tipping it back in an obvious show of surrender. It was only then that Nestaron broke the silence, passing her the bottle as he began to explain.

"I was raised on the stories and histories of the Travelers. My grandmother was one of the first, and few to have survived, my father was one, and when my parents learned that I too had that gift they wept, and vowed to have no other children. I found it odd then, that the stories that had been told to me in celebration were now to be mourned over. I was young though, far too young to know that I was not given a gift at all, so when I progressed more rapidly than my father had I believed I was better suited the role than he." Nestaron said with a regretful sneer, taking another nauseating sip of his wine. "I believed that because I was so skilled and had devoted so much time of my life in dutiful service as a Traveler that I had garnered some sort of favor with the Valar. I believed I had their blessing, and perhaps for a time I did…but the devotion of one does not erase the refusal of hundreds and so I continued on in the same way I always had, ignorant to this.

I soon grew bored of this world, it's assignments grew too easy for me, and since I was not bound to this world I travelled to others, seeking to right those wrongs. There were other worlds were Travelers were held in high esteem, like gods. Laugh if you wish, I did, but I reveled in it! I was a fool, Kate. I touted my title to anyone who would listen, I altered futures in exchange for wealth and power. I didn't harm anyone, no not directly, there are Travelers who do…but I broke rules Kate. I did not heed the council of those wiser than me. I would not listen. I made my life in another world and when I met Gyda I was quite content to stay there all the rest of our days. It did not bother me that she was mortal, she would live thousands of years longer than a human, but it would never have been enough. An eternity is never enough."

"You loved her then? Even though she was mortal?" Kate asked.

"I did."

"Where is she now?" She asked, her voice barely above a whisper. She couldn't imagine the Nestaron she knew now would have been so reckless, or so enamored with anyone.

"She died." Came his hoarse reply. His eyes hardening as he took another drink and with a disgusted sneer threw the cup into the fire, the glass shattering as the alcohol briefly aggravated the flames. "I am to blame for that."

Kate looked at the Elf, mouth agape as the words finally reached her ears. With a furrowed brow, she finally shook her head, mouth still struggling to find the words as Nestaron let out a mirthless laugh.

"It is a cruel irony that Travelers should work so hard to secure the fate of others and yet to secure our own is forbidden." Nestaron slumped in his chair and Kate felt the anger, and horror, rage and despair roll off of him in waves. It seemed wrong that she should be privy to such intense emotions coming from one of the Eldar, she was so unaccustomed to such a display!

Most Elves had their emotions schooled, hidden behind a serene mask that she had so often associated elves with. Legolas often wore that mask, except when they were alone, in the moments that it was the two of them.

But Nestaron was different. She had never wondered how he felt, anger and outrage being at the forefront. She had assumed his transparency was because he was far too old to care but now she realized that it was because he simply could not hide it if he tried. The depth of his sorrow and fury were far great to be concealed, overflowing in a manner that would have been unseemly if it were not for the authority with which he carried himself.

"You know that we work in service to secure a history, a web, that time had already spun. You know this, . So of course, when our love grew and the assignment of what was to come loomed in my mind, I had to leave. Gyda knew that I would return, as I always did. I behaved myself, followed the rules much more closely, since loving her. I would not risk harming her future…our future…I was the model Traveler once again…but what I had done, how I had acted, could never be undone. The lives we lead are much more permanent that the trails blazed by others. So I moved forward through time to ensure that the history of that world remained unchanged.

There was to be an attack you see, an attack that had to happen, but it would end in the passing of their queen…naturally there was one who tried to stop it, to alter the events but it had to go on, and so I ensured that it did…I walked through the carnage as unaffected as always, lulled into safety by knowing that Gyda and I would be far away when the attack occurred a thousand years later…but then I heard her scream. She was impossible to miss, and as she fled screaming with the others, Kate I thought my heart would stop…I had to get her out! I could not just let her die there. But Traveler's cannot send others…you know this now, and I learned that day just how serious an offense it was."

"You were trying to save her life!" Kate choked out. "Isn't that what a Traveler does? How big a crime was it if you were saving her life?!"

"Saving lives is not what a Traveler does. It does not matter what my intention was. I had erred one to many times. She died in my arms. Of course, after the attacks were over and the dust had settled I was taken before their King. They knew who I was, what I was, and when he asked me to alter what had been done and I refused…well, to kill a Traveler in their world is a greater crime than it is here…but if it were not for his son I am sure he would have killed me anyway. I did not care. I begged him to.

Since his dungeons were in ruins and he could not kill me, he cast me out, sent me away, back to Middle Earth where he believed I would be killed. As soon as I arrived , I attempted to return to Gyda… back to when I knew she would still be alive but I soon discovered that I had been stripped of that title. Does that surprise you? I suppose it would, it surprised me too, I did not know such a fate was possible. It seemed that the only acceptable punishment for the crimes I had committed was not death but life. I would live my life as any other Ellon, but I was not afforded the luxury of fading from my grief. I would live out the rest of my life knowing that I had ended hers. I could never see her again, in this time or any other, all I could do was count the hours until her death."

Kate didn't know what to say, words failed her. How could someone allow such suffering and think it was a fitting punishment? Could trying to save someone he loved alter time so greatly that he deserved that? No one deserved that! It was cruel! No wonder he had been so hard on her!

Nestaron knew first-hand what could go wrong and just how badly she had messed up! What she had blown off and assumed was no big deal was actually a critical error!

"I-I'm so sorry, Nestaron. I had no idea." She whispered. "I'm so sorry…"

"To be cursed by the Valar is not a joke, and those that dictate our laws except them to be obeyed. Not only did the Valar and Vanrë ensure that Travelers have no peace in life…but they also made sure there would be no peace in death. Every Traveler, no matter their race would see no afterlife" He explained, his bitterness coating every word ". It does not matter if you knew what you were doing or not… you are expected to obey. Whatever your punishment will be…I am sorry for you my friend, truly I am, but I must ensure that Legolas does not become an inadvertent casualty. You understand this, do you not? You understand why this goes far beyond simply loving a mortal."

"I do understand, Nestaron, but you have to know I would never do something to put Legolas in danger. I would never do anything to hurt him or put him in harm's way, you have to know this!"

"But you already have!" Nestaron hissed. "The moment he opened his heart to you, the moment you took it and gave him yours in return… you sentenced him to his death. I have known Legolas for his entire life, I have seen the way he looks at you, as if you were starlight itself. As if you were the sun, the stars, the moon and every day he now lives in danger…his very heartbeat hinges upon the continuation of your own. When you die, and you will Kate…today, tomorrow, twenty or a hundred years from now, he will fade. Your life, however blessed with additional years, is still not long enough. And should you continue to operate in your ignorance and be fooled by the likes of Kedron or others who have seen how infantile you are, they will use you if they can! You will be fooled into acting as a pawn all the days of your life and one day it will be the final time! You will be punished for it and it will kill him!"

"Then teach me!" Kate shouted, her voice cracking as leaned in. "Teach me what to do so I don't make those mistakes! Teach me what to do Nestaron!"

"It is too late! Do you not see? It is too late."

"No, it's not! I'll talk to them, this Valar, whatever they are, I'll explain. I'll try harder, I'll learn everything that I can, I'll be the best Traveler that I can but I won't be punished for not knowing!" She stammered, standing to her feet now and pacing. There would be a way out of this, she would fix this! She had to fix this! She wasn't going to let Legolas die because of her!

But she did know this would happen, she remembered, stopping in her tracks. He had told her that elves do fade for loving a mortal…but not always right? "H-he said he would not die…he said not every Elf fades. Elrond didn't. His, father, his own father didn't! He might not right? It's not too late, we have time! He doesn't have to fade and I don't have to keep this up. We can make this work. He said not everyone fades."

"He cannot speak on how he will handle a loss he has never known! Thranduil did not fade solely for Legolas's sake and even then, it was all I could do to keep him here! Thranduil has never been the same since the death of his wife. He might not have faded but he was not the Ellon we once knew! I did my best to shield Legolas from those memories of his father during that time but he is not blind to the change it has caused!" Nestaron barked, turning away from her and pouring his own glass of wine, downing it before he spoke again. "When you die, Legolas will as well. Then his father from the loss. There is no future in this union, no life there, only death! You are mortal, you will die, no matter how long you have. Should They seek to give you mercy I can promise you that the years you might have together will be cut shorter already. You will spend them in service, doing your duty and ensuring that time and history and the events of the worlds you take charge of happen just as they should. Whatever time you have between assignments you might get to spend with him, of course, but should you love result in a child? Where would it live? It cannot go with you. What should happen if it too is a Traveler? What if that is your punishment? To watch your child, endure the same fate as you? To watch them writhe in agony every time they get near a stone circle, or happen to pass through? This cannot end the way you hope it will Kate. You have a duty here, and you cannot allow yourself to give over to love. It will not well for either of you."

"I-I didn't mean for this to happen. We didn't…I didn't mean to… it just happened." Kate could barely breath. His words fell against her, burning her like acid rain, marking her in just the same way. How could she continue to be oblivious to all this? How could she go on letting him love her? Was it not selfish?

"No one means to fall in love Kate." Nestaron said, gentler now. "The act itself is unintentional…you hardly even notice it. The sun rises and sets as it always does and then one day you notice its light refracted in a drop of morning dew, bending and twisting itself to create a world of color. You feel it's warmth upon your skin, admire the wonders its light reveals and how quickly it chases away the night. You will never be able to ignore it now. It has saturated you in its golden light and you can never live a life under the moon, a moon that can only reflect its majesty but it will never come close…it is a mockery to even try.

You are ruined for anything else. No one means to live a life of ruin…it just happens. But night will fall…the sun has to set as it always does…you see it coming…see it sink further and further, see the skies change color to allow for the night. You can choose to ignore it…you can tell yourself that you are content with those few hours, that you will bask in its radiance, dance under its light and weep for the sheer joy of it all and when the night comes you tell yourself you will accept this.

It is how it has always been and how it always will be…the sun has it's time, some days are longer and some are shorter but it must always set. Though you beg and plead for a few more hours, more time to feel its warmth on your face, to grasp its light in your hands it is not possible. You know this…the sun knows this, it is how it must be, how it has always been and will be and when the last of its light fades, you will mourn its loss most bitterly. The world is dark, its colors are muted, it holds no warmth for you now and you are alone, lost and waiting for the smallest glimpse of light to come back into your world again but it does not rise, and to wait until morning is agony because you will never know another dawn such as the one you had seen.

If you are strong you will one day welcome the oblivion that is the night, you embrace its cold and you worship the stars for they are almost like the sun…shattered and splintered and set into the darkness to remind us that there was once a star so bright it chased away the dark. That is why we Elves so love the stars…because they are memory and hope. They remind us of those we have lost to the night and gives us hope that we will see the sun again. But for those who have no hope, those who cannot bare the long night of this world alone… the last of their light will fade just as their sun did and all others are left to watch as their colors blur from golden to orange, purples and blues until they have faded into the night, leaving nothing more than a memory."

Kate couldn't speak as the tears fell down her face, the lump in her throat made even the thought of speaking impossible. What could she even say in rebuttal? There was nothing to say. She should have never come here. Should have never followed Aragorn, should have left when Galadriel gave her the chance.

She choked out another sob as his words seeped into her heart and she imagined Legolas dying in such a way…the light fading in his eyes, the laughter failing on his lips… She warned you…did Galadriel not warn you? You didn't listen, you never listen. You are a fool Kate Mackenzie.

"I have said too much...I do not mean to be cruel. I do not tell you these things to hurt you…but you should know. You cannot be ignorant to them. If I did not care for you I would not have warned you."

"No, it's fine. I needed-I mean you have always told me the truth I would never have expected anything less. I asked for the truth and you told me." She said, clearing her throat and brusquely trying to wipe her tears away before Nestaron stopped her, taking her hand into his and wiping her tears away with his lean fingers. Kate was surprised by the overly friendly gesture of the auburn-haired Elf and gawked at him.

"Kate, I have grown very fond of you. Were you not a Traveler I would make every effort to campaign for a betrothal between you and Legolas…a fine match you would make. But you are not and fond of you though I am, Thranduil is and will always be my King and closest friend. I hope you will not consider it a betrayal when I inform him on the goings on of his son." He said softly.

"No, I get it. Do what you have to do." She replied, rubbing her throat in an effort to soften the knot that had taken up residence there. She sipped her glass numbly as she stared into the dying embers of the fire, her mind trying to wrap itself around everything that she had been told. "Thank you for your candor."

"It has been a long day, a hard day, for you. It is much to consider, this new information. Perhaps you should rest." He said as gently as he could, the memories of his own heartache bubbling to the surface.

"Yeah. Perhaps." She murmured, emptying her glass and filling it again. Neither of them made any move to leave. Instead they sat in commiserated misery, gazing at the dying fire until it was nothing more than a few glowing embers. Nestaron squeezed her hand he still held, the warmth of his gesture making Kate wash down the rest of her tears with another swig of the wine. "It really is shit wine." Kate whispered, and the ellon barked out a laugh in agreement.

It felt like hours had passed before Nestaron spoke again, and when he did his voice had softened, until it could barely be heard above the howling wind outside.

"Bear in mind Kate, however much one mourns the bitterness of night…not a single one has regretted their time in the sun, nor would one wish to rob anyone else of it. But one must always be warned that night does fall…it makes the daylight feel all the brighter when they know it cannot last."

He sounded lightyears away, his voice, his memories taking him back to a time and world where he had once lived in his own sunlight.

---

It seemed like Kate had only just closed her eyes to sleep when suddenly she was being shaken awake. She growled in frustration, slapping the hands away until the unearthly glow that surrounded him revealed her intruder.

"What?" Kate moaned, rolling over, the wine still swimming in her head.

"Get up. Get dressed." Legolas ordered, grabbing her leggings off the chair and tossing them onto her bed. "I will wait outside until you are dressed. Where is your sword?"

"With Bergil." Kate slurred, grabbing the leggings and tossing them back on the ground. "Let me sleep."

"No, we have wasted too much time already. I will be just outside your door." Before Kate could offer any further argument, he was gone. She huffed, rolling out of bed with a disgruntled frown and lazily pulled on her leggings, muttering the entire time.

This can't wait till morning? She thought irritably, braiding her hair. You've barely said three words to me and now you're going to wake me up at zero dark thirty? Cool thanks.

There were things she needed to say to him, things that she'd rather not say now, but it seemed that Legolas was quite insistent, and as he impatiently rapt on her door for the second time, Kate drudged herself out of the room.

"Follow me." He said, his voice echoing eerily against the stone walls but Kate blearily obliged, following him all the way out into the stable where his horse waited. Kate frowned, staring warily at the beast, wondering if Legolas had really dragged her all the way out here at this hour for a horseback ride.

The groom available had already bridled the horse, for what Kate had assumed was her benefit and before Kate could process Legolas was up an on the white horse, and holding out his hand to help Kate on. The groom gave her an additional boost and with grumbled thanks she stared uneasily at the ground, wondering if she was sober enough to be allowed on horseback. Couldn't this be considered drinking and driving?

"If our companions look for us let them know we will be back in time for the feast tonight." Legolas said to the man, in a way that left no room for questions and with a jolt they were off, speeding out of the stables and through the gates that opened for them without question.

"Where are we going?!" Kate shouted, the horse's mane whipping across her face as several strands landed in her mouth. She sputtered, slapping the hairs out of her mouth and willing herself not to vomit as the galloping motion of the horse set her stomach rolling.

Legolas gave no answer and the determined set of his jaw made Kate to know that she probably wouldn't until they had arrived at their destination.

Finally, Legolas urged the horse to a stop and when Kate slid off the horse and turned to look for Edoras, all that could be seen of it in the distance was a few speckled dots that could have easily been mistaken for stars in the night sky.

What were they doing so far out and away from the safety of Edoras?

"Legolas, what are you doing? We can't be here, there could be Orcs arou-"

"There are no Orcs." He said pulling out another pair of daggers, much smaller than his, they looked like Merry and Pippin's.

"Legolas, please tell me you did not steal the hobbits weapons."

"I asked to borrow them for the purpose of your training and they obliged. I will have your own commissioned for you in time." He answered handing the blades to her and grabbing his own.

"I don't need knives, Legolas! I have a sword and I don't need to train right now, I need to sleep! Besides we can train at Edoras."

"No, if you were to train at Edoras than all others would see your deficiencies and that might leave you vulnerable. No. We train here, everyday. Kedron's aptitudes may lie in sorcery but he is skilled in combat, do not let him fool you. He is dangerous, Kate. He fights with two swords so you will train with the knives for now until you get the feel of it. You won't learn enough to kill him but you may yet learn enough defend yourself." Legolas said, pulling out his own knives and holding them at the ready, motioning for Kate to demonstrate that same stance.

"I'm not gonna fight Kedron, Legolas!" Kate argued, but mimicked his stance all the same.

"You may not have a choice. Hold your elbows higher." The urgency of his voice made Kate pause in her arguments and she obligingly walked through the defensive stances and choreographed strikes.

Legolas pushed her harder than he ever had. He had never been an easy instructor, neither had Aragorn or Boromir for that matter, but he had never been so easily upset! Every failed block, every missed strike and fumbled step seemed only to upset him and Kate learned quickly that while Legolas seemed to be eternally patient, she was nearing the point where that patience ended.

"You would not have missed that had you not spent your night drinking. Try again. Pay attention." Legolas chided, and Kate repeated, failing to block his strike yet again. "Kate! You are not taking this as seriously as you should! Do you not care? Right now, you are as defenseless as a bird."

"I wouldn't say that now!" Kate countered, blocking a strike only to have the blade knocked out of her hand. Legolas let out a frustrated exhale, shaking his head as he stared at the blade that they uselessly on the ground.

"He could snap your neck with no effort on his part at all! You make it so easy, how can you not even try?"

"I am trying!" Kate shouted, throwing the other dagger down in frustration. "But if you hadn't noticed, yesterday was a bit of a rough day for me, so I'm a little tired, and yes a little hungover. Sue me!"

"You are acting like a child. I will not teach you if you have no desire to learn." Legolas responded his own anger reaching the tipping point.

"Then don't freaking teach me Legolas, ok? Don't teach me then."

"Have you no concern for your own welfare? Valar help me if you are not the most stubborn woman I have ever lied eyes upon in all my long years!" Legolas grunted in frustration, barely containing himself.

"And you're the most stubborn Elf!" She screamed.

"Where are you going?"

"Back to bed!" She shouted, storming off past the horse, intent on walking the distance back. "And guess what I am probably going to get drunk at this feast tonight too. You should try it, let off some steam instead of piling it on me."

"When you are done acting like a child, I will be happy to offer you a ride. You should not walk back, not while you are still injured." He responded, his voice just as cool and sharp as the blades he held in his hands.

"Oh, do not!" She shouted, whirling on him. "Do not play the 'I'm so much older than you' Elf card right now Legolas! It's so annoying! What the hell! You have hardly spoken more than three words to me, you wouldn't even look at me all day yesterday and now you yank me out here in the middle of the night and expect me to master this tonight? I'm kind of dealing with something right now!"

"You think I am not as well? You think it does not pain me to know that the woman I love, that I have trusted with my life cannot do the same?" Legolas shouted back, stepping forward and meeting her burning glare with a rage of his own.

"I do trust you!"

" Do you? Then why would you not tell me, Kate? Is your life so invaluable to you that you insist on putting yourself in danger at every turn? First with Boromir and then with the Uruk-hai, and now Kedron? If something were to happen to you, Kate...How could you be so foolish? Did you not think you could come to me? That I could not help you?"

"Getting kidnapped by a hoarde of Uruk's wasn't exactly what I signed up for on this magical mystery tour! It wasn't by fault Legolas! And Boromir was my friend, don't throw him in my face! I wanted to make sure he didn't do anything stupid!"

"So instead you chose to do something stupid for him? I suppose you thought you could help Kedron too, hmm? What did he tell you to make you believe him, to make you trust him? Tell me so perhaps I might say the same thing and garner your trust as well! Maybe then you will stop trying to put yourself in danger!"

"Oh wow!" Kate gasped, hands on her hips. "Wooow. Well said, very princely of you. You've made quite the impassioned speech. I didn't trust Kedron, not for a minute but he was the only one who had begun to tell me anything. Plus he saved my life so I do owe him. Apparently."

"You owe him nothing." Legolas seethed, his eyes flashing gray. "Whatever your debt is I will pay ten times that. I will not see you indebted to him! What were you thinking!"

"I wasn't! I wanted to protect you and Aragorn and Frodo and, I don't know Legolas! I didn't know what to do! I just wanted to keep you all safe."

"But that is just it, Kate! You do not need to protect me! I am not one of your patients, so frail and grasping at the threads of life that you need to soothe and shield me from the things that plague you! Have I not made myself clear in that? Have I not told you that you can trust me to bear your burdens and well as your triumphs? Would you not do the same for me?" Legolas insisted grabbing hold of her shoulder so that she would hear his words and not turn away. "What more can I do to show you that you may trust me to keep you safe? At times, I cannot help but feel that you simply waiting for me to give truth to the presumption in your mind that I will leave you… and perhaps it is not your fault, you are so used to being alone, as you have said, that perhaps this is the only thing that you know, but I would be lying if I said it was not maddening!"

"But I do, Legolas! You don't understand! You know what I am, I hate to think that you've known this whole time, but you might have, and you know how this will end! I'm a Traveler, and I am mortal! We are kidding ourselves to think that we can go on like this and pretending that this will have a happy ending! It won't! I can't have you die because of me, Legolas, I can't! I can't do it! I don't want you to fade!"

"Why are you saying this? Why do you speak of our demise so soon? You cannot know what will happen and if I fade, I fade. Do you think me so weak that I would not endeavor to keep myself from fading? That I would just give in? Why do you say such things?"

"Galadriel said there was no future in our union, Legolas! She said that, and Nestaron told me what would happen. He told me that you'd say this and that you couldn't speak of how you'd react to a pain you've never known! That you can't accept living in the night after you've lived in the sun or something like that and that you would fade, and then your father would fade and then-"

"Kate, stop. Stop." Legolas urged, shaking his head in frustration. "I care not what Nestaron says or Galadriel. They cannot know the future, it is not set in stone, your very existence proves that to be so! Things can change. It is not certain."

"But-"

"There is no argument to be made! If you truly wish to put an end to this, then let it meets it's end and I will say not more on the matter, but I do not believe that is what you want. Is it? Am I wrong?" He asked, his hands cupping her face and wiping her tears.

"No, no, of course you're not wrong." Kate sobbed, shaking her head. " I don't want to end this but I don't want you to die! I shouldn't have been so selfish, I went into this without thinking of the consequences or anything. Aren't you scared? Doesn't this scare you? And after everything you've heard today, everything you've learned about me and what I am…that doesn't scare you?"

"Kate believe me, I knew of the consequences long before you did. I would have loved you whether you had reciprocated that affection or not. You think that withholding your love would have prevented this but you are wrong. It could not be helped. You are the one I love. Nestaron says you are like my sun, then so be it. You are my sun and If all I am allowed is this day for you to shine upon me then I shall lie under your light for as long as I can. All I ask is that you do not hide yourself behind a cloud to shield me from your light or I will climb the tallest tree, the highest mountain, past the clouds themselves for a glimpse at it. I am not afraid to be burned by your light…I am afraid of its absence…afraid of never truly seeing its glory as it passes behind clouds. Do not hide yourself from me Kate…not if this is all we have. If you want to protect me than do so by not putting yourself in danger. Do not allow yourself to be snuffed out before it is your time. If we are to be one then let us be of one heart. I can handle your fears, I can shoulder your problems and bear your burdens. It is not a grievance to me. Would you not do the same for me? If my life is shortened by being in your light then let it be shortened. I care not."

"But I do care Legolas. I want you to live and to be happy and safe whether I'm here or not. You have to promise me Legolas, promise me you won't fade."

"I cannot make such a-"

"No, you have to. You have to promise." Kate urged, stepping out of his embrace. "I need you to promise. We can live wondering when the clocks going to run out on us."

Legolas run his arms and returned her gaze, holding back an amused smile as he regarded her.

"I will promise to try, if you promise not to continue to put yourself in harm's way. And that you will tell me if you are in danger. And if Kedron should find you again."

"That is three things. I get two more."

"Kate." Legolas sighed, pulling her back into his arms with a roll of his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I should have told you. I didn't know it would have upset you so much. I could have handled it." Kate conceded, resting her head against his chest, listening to the comforting sound of his heart beat.

"How could it not upset me?" He asked incredulously. "How would your being put in danger not upset me? Your idea of handling it and mine are very different, melethnin."

"Fair point." Kate sighed. "Be patient with me…I'm learning how to do this. It's not like we have a normal dynamic here."

"No, we do not." Legolas agreed with a sigh, kissing her head. "I am learning too. I should not have reacted how I did…You needed my support and I reacted out of fear and anger. Forgive me."

"It's fine, you were processing, I can forgive that. What I cannot forgive is waking me in the middle of the night and dragging me out here. You will have to earn that." She teased, smiled as his soft laughter vibrated in his chest.

"As much as I would enjoy earning your forgiveness," he teased, planting a kiss behind her ear that made her shudder, "I will not apologize for trying to teach you to defend yourself. It is a skill you should learn. I need you to be able defend yourself, especially against Kedron. Do not let yourself grow comfortable with him because you think he spared your life." He added, his tone growing serious.

"Yeah, I get that." Kate said with a sigh, resigning herself once again to daily training. In truth, she had gotten rusty and it would do her some good to work those muscles again.

"I am serious Kate…please… "He started, voice tightening as Kate leaned her head up to look at him. "Please, think before you act… do not be so reckless, not while you carry my heart. Please."

Kate could feel her heartbreaking as the depths of his love shone through his eyes and spilled out in his words.

He did love her, she could trust that. She would be less reckless. She had to remember that this world was not like hers, and with the additional Traveler stuff she couldn't afford to get herself into any more trouble.

"I love you." She whispered, standing on her toes to place a kiss to his lips. "I will try, I will."

How hard could it be?

A/N: OK! This was a long chapter and I hope it cleared up a few things for you, and made some sense as to why Galadriel acted as she did and everything that had happened so far! Also I hoped this was easy to read, I tried to break up the longer dialogue by separating it into a few paragraph but if you find that confusing let me know and I'll adjust it .

I'm doing my best to update as fast as possible but with school started up again it might be awhile, but just trust that I won't abandon this story! Also, I know this was a heavy chapter, I'm sorry…but Kate really needed to know the seriousness of everything she was getting herself into and she needed to realign herself with who she could trust. Just because someone saves your life and feeds you a few nuggets of truth doesn't mean you can trust them, right?

Hope you all enjoyed this chapter and are still excited about where it's headed and a thousand thank you's to everyone who has read and reviewed and followed this story. It means a lot.

Please Read and Review and stay tuned for the next chapter.