"I find shelter in this way
Under cover, hide away
Can you hear when I say
I have never felt this way
Maybe I had said something that was wrong
Can I make it better with the lights turned on
Maybe I had said something that was wrong
Can I make it better with the lights turned on
Could I be, was I there
It felt so crystal in the air
I still want to drown whenever you leave
Please teach me gently how to breathe" Shelter by Birdy
Chapter 15
So when Nat said Bucky would want to be involved in my training up again she wasn't lying. It's been three weeks now that I've been up at the asscrack of dawn with my sadist boyfriend working out, sparring, running, shooting, and practicing with knives. Of course Steve is on board with all of it, he and Bucky never even break a sweat. Even Natasha gets tired out occasionally when working out with them.
"Liya, time to wake up. We got work to do." I growl and swat Bucky's hand away. My phone is shoved under my pillow, I fish it out and sigh when I see its yet again 4:30 in the morning.
"I'm not going to the gym today Bucky. I need a fucking break, I'm not a super soldier. I'm so sore I can barely move and I haven't had a rest day in weeks." Seriously I feel like death. I'm run ragged and muscles I didn't even know I have hurt.
"You're the one who said you have a feeling that somethings comin. I'm just makin sure you're prepared. Some bad guy shows up he ain't gonna give you a break sweetheart." I get what he's saying but I feel like shit.
"I appreciate it babe, really I do, but I physically am pushed to my limits right now. If I keep going as hard as I have been I'm going to hurt myself. I'm just asking for one day to chill out."
Cold metal presses to my bare shoulder and pushes me to my back. I wince at the pain from just even that small amount of movement. Concern is swimming in those blue grey eyes I love so much.
"I'm sorry if I've been overdoin it. I guess I kinda forget that other people have limitations that Steve and I don't." His flesh hand runs through his hair, it's an adorable nervous habit of his.
"You don't have to be sorry, I know you would never intentionally cause me any kind of pain. It's just all of this training on top of working is exhausting me." He still looks apologetic.
"How bout you let me pamper ya today darlin, since I made you feel this way and all. I'm gonna go run you a bath." Before I can get a word in he hops to his feet and is making his way to the bathroom. Funny how the Brooklyn accent is pretty much a constant anymore.
When Bucky reappears he scoops me into his arms making me squeal in surprise. He walks me to the bathroom and lowers me gently into the huge tub.
"You better get your sexy ass in here with me." He smiles warmly and climbs in behind me. His arms wrap around me and pull me against his chest.
"Mmm this is nice. Why haven't we done this before?" I melt into his embrace, his voice vibrates through his chest, I love his voice.
"Well we're kinda terrible at being naked and keeping our hands to ourselves Buck. Not much time for relaxing in the tub." He chuckles deeply and presses a kiss to the top of my head.
"If you weren't so sore I definitely wouldn't be keepin my hands to myself." Definitely know that's the truth. I can feel his arousal against my back but that's it's not like he can help it.
"And whose fault is the soreness?" He groans dramatically.
"I'm definitely feelin the consequences of my actions and promise to take it easier on ya."
We spend a good half hour relaxing in the tub and helping each other wash. It definitely has me feeling more relaxed.
Bucky makes us French toast and bacon for breakfast and we stay in comfy lazy day clothes. Even on the days I look my most bummy he looks like a damn GQ model. We're snuggling on the couch with me between his legs while watching Casablanca which Bucky actually vaguely remembers.
"My ma really woulda loved ya Liya. She always said I needed a woman who could put up with my smart mouth and fight back." His flesh hand is absentmindedly tracing patterns on my arm.
"I wish I could have met her and thanked her for gifting the world with you James Barnes." His head drops onto my shoulder, lips press to my neck gently.
"You say the sweetest things doll. I just love you so fucking much." God he's adorable.
"I love you so fucking much too." He chuckles and squeezes me tightly.
Of course our peaceful day is interrupted by a blaring alarm and the sound of Friday's voice.
"Mr. Stark would like me to inform anyone currently inside the compound that the barn door protocol is being put into effect immediately."
The two of us jump to our feet as the room darkens around us. The compound is being completely sealed off.
"Friday where the hell is Tony? What's going on?" Bucky is rushing around the room grabbing the numerous guns and blades we have hidden.
"Mr. Stark has requested both you and Sergeant Barnes to come to the ground floor and to suit up." Mother fucker. I knew the peace couldn't last forever. We both run to the bedroom and slip quickly into our tactical gear. Mine is similar to Natasha's except a deep green with black line work. Bucky's newer uniform that T'challa had made for him is very reminiscent of the old howling commandos uniform.
"Toss me that case under the bed please." Bucky slides me the case as we both lace up our boots. I take the two black kamas out and put them into their place on my tactical belt.
The two of us move in unison out of our room and down the stairwell rather than taking the elevator. Both of us hold our guns out in front of us not knowing what to expect. We make it to the other without incident, Bucky always standing protectively in front of me. Everyone is geared up, except Bruce who looks fidgety and uncomfortable.
"What's happening Ton?" Before he can answer a thundering sound reverberates directly where the front door should be. Obviously it was some kind of explosion that can't get through whatever the hell Tony has put in place to shield the building.
"Uh hostiles that are using some kind of crazy weaponry have managed to somehow get past all security and literally be at the front door. From what I'm seeing I'm assuming they're Hydra because it's all looking very much like the weapons at the last cell we busted." Fucking great. Bucky inhales loudly and raggedly beside me.
"Why are we in here and not out there kicking their asses?" I really wish I wasn't as sore as I am right now.
"Cap here has a feeling they might be here to try to collect their "asset" figured we'd try to keep you two on the inside if at all possible." Bucky flinches at the word asset and clenches his jaw.
"It's probably best that he stay in here but why me?" Steve is the one that answers me.
"No one should know that Bucky is here but they do, we have to assume that they also know the nature of your relationship. We can't let them use that and if these are the same men that Fury came here about then they know who you are. We need you to keep your distance. Vision, Wanda, Sam, Rhodey, and Tony are heading out now. The rest of us will stay here with you and hope we aren't needed." At that all the people he just said take off towards the roof exit.
"The mission you turned down was about Hydra? That's what Fury wanted you for?" This may be the first time I've ever heard Bucky sound upset with me. His voice is quiet but accusatory.
"Natasha, Clint, and I were stationed in Sofia years ago on a mission. We didn't know the men we were dealing with then were Hydra. I'm not an agent anymore and I didn't want to get dragged into it." It's not a lie. He seems to be able to tell I'm leaving something out because his eyes narrow and he turns to Steve.
"Who are they?" Steve looks like he'd rather run into battle than deal with answering his best friends question.
"We don't know who is out there right now Buck." His steely gaze turns to Natasha.
"Who were the men that Fury told you about Natalia?" Her face is impassive as usual.
"Like Steve said, we don't know who's out there Barnes." His vibranium hand clenches into a fist.
"Someone better tell me who the fuck we are dealing with right now! Obviously everyone but me knows what's going on!" I've never heard him so angry and it makes my stomach drop. I speak up so I don't upset him even further.
"Radko Kozlek, a Bulgarian based arms dealer, drug kingpin, and human trafficker. Fury recently got intelligence that he's been dealing and manufacturing Hydra weapons and experimenting on people. Dima Karpov is working with him." You could hear a pin drop it's suddenly so quiet. The pain and anger is so evident on Bucky's face that I feel my eyes welling up. He turns away from me without a word. When I take a step towards him he takes one back.
"Let me out of this god damn building right now Steve." Before Steve can even respond Tony comes over our coms.
"They're gone. There is no one out here and absolutely no trace of them." What the fuck?
"But we saw them on the security cameras, they shot some kind of explosive at the door." They definitely did.
"Well they aren't here now. Sam and Rhodey are going to fly out and see if they can find anything."
"I'm going to find them." Bucky tries to push past Steve but he immediately puts a stop to that." If looks could kill we'd all be dead right now.
"Buck, you're not goin out there right now. You're pissed off and not thinkin straight which is exactly why we didn't say anything to you about it before." That was so not the right thing to say. Bucky chuckles humorlessly.
"Ya know, I expect that bullshit from you Steve, you've done nothing but hover over me like I'm a fucking bomb who's bound to blow up at any minute since I got here. You've always been a stupidly overprotective asshole." Bucky rounds on me, his eyes blazing with hurt and anger. "But you? I really didn't think you'd hide or lie to me about anything because I sure as hell would never do it to you. Soul mates, huh? What a fucking joke." It's like a slap to the face, his words knock the wind out of me.
"Bucky!" Now Steve sounds angry but he doesn't stop his friend from darting off back towards the elevator.
"Liya, are you ok?" Steve puts a comforting hand on my shoulder. I can't really stop the tears from spilling over now.
"He's right, he never would have hid anything like this from me. What the hell is wrong with me?" Now Natasha is at my side and she pulls me into her arms. I'm too upset to be shocked by her sudden show of affection.
"You just wanted to protect him. You didn't want to see him get himself hurt because he'd be hell bent on revenge. Which is exactly what he was trying to do by wanting to go out there just now without thinking. It's too soon for him to be going out on missions involving Hydra." Regardless of my reasoning I still hurt him. I feel like the biggest piece of shit.
"It's not my place to make that decision for him though. I did it out of selfishness, I didn't want to risk popping this peaceful little bubble we've been living in. I have to fix this." It's at that moment that the compound begins to open up again. The metal plates that surrounded the building a moment ago are now sliding out of sight.
The rest of the team make their way back into the building as I run towards the elevator. When I get to our suite Bucky is nowhere to be found.
One of his dresser drawers is still open, a few articles of clothing are missing. The leather bag he keeps by his side of the bed is gone as well. Of course none of his guns are in their places either. A wave of nausea hits me so hard that I barely make it to the toilet before I'm throwing up.
"Friday get me Steve please." He's granted access a few minutes later with Natasha in tow.
"He's gone Stevie." Natasha helps me to my feet and moves us to the living room.
"Friday, is Bucky in the compound still?"
"No he is not Captain Rogers. Sergeant Barnes left approximately twenty minutes ago." I can't stop the tears as they fall.
"I'm going to bring him back Liya." If anyone can it's Steve. Natasha keeps an arm wrapped around me.
"I don't want him to get himself killed Stevie, this wasn't supposed to happen." My door bursts open and in walks Tony and Clint.
"We need to get you and Terminator moved to a safe house ASAP while we figure out what the hell is going on with these magically disappearing HYDRA agents. I'm not convinced either of you are ready for combat and you're probably the targets." Clint is at my side the second he noticed how I'm crying and shaking. Tony cocks his head to the side in question. "I miss something here? I mean I heard the little drama fest downstairs but figured it had blown over by now." Steve narrows his eyes at Tony's insensitivity.
"Bucky is gone. He took a bag and some weapons and left." Tony wipes a hand over his face in obvious exasperation.
"Son of a bitch! Friday get me a visual of when Barnes left." Tony continues to curse under his breath as he watches the footage Friday pulls up. He presses two fingers to the com in his ear. "Wilson and Rhodes I need you guys to keep an eye out for Barnes, he took off and has to be in pursuit of these Hydra guys too. If you find him I need you to restrain him and contact me immediately, we can't have him involved in this right now." I can't believe any of this is happening.. I'm trying and failing to calm myself down.
Tony kneels in front of me and takes one of my hands in his. "Gotta say I've never seen you this torn up Annie." The concern in his voice is so unfamiliar, Tony isn't big on emotions. "I hate to say this to you right now but we gotta move you to a safe house like we planned." I rip my hand out of his.
"I'm not going anywhere without Bucky. You all need to stop treating me like I'm incapable of defending myself. I was an agent before you were ever even Iron Man. Ive killed more people than you can even imagine Tony." Maybe I shouldn't be lashing out at him but I can't believe he would even suggest I leave right now.
"I know you can take care of yourself, everyone knows that. I also know that if these guys that tortured and brainwashed Barnes for seventy years and experimented on Wanda and her brother and killed countless others realize that not only are you a former Shield agent that infiltrated their ranks but the SOULMATE of their precious Soldier that there's nothing that's going to stop them from trying to get to you. What the hell do you think Barnes would do if you got kidnapped by his former handler? You think he'd go in clear headed and come out in one piece? We have no idea what we're really dealing with here. If they're experimenting on and creating enhanced again than I can't guarantee mine let alone anyone else's safety. So I need to make sure you're somewhere that they don't know about and when I find your boyfriend I swear to you on everything that I will get him to you."
Just a couple hours ago I was sitting in a bath tub with the love of my life and now everything has gone to complete shit. What am I supposed to do.
"I know how you feel about Bucky, but please, PLEASE, get him back to me in one piece. I have to apologize, I need him Tony." I don't think I've actually ever cried in front of my friends.
"Hey, no tears Annie. You gotta get out of here. Romanoff why don't you go with her, ok? Don't tell anyone including me where you're going." Natasha nods and helps me to my feet. We both quickly pack bags. I guess this is it.