A/N: Sorry it has been so long between updates. I was conflicted about the way to start this chapter, and wrote at least four different versions, all beginning at different points in the episode. I also had initially planned on having only three parts to this story, but after a lot of debating I decided that I am going to break up what was originally going to be the middle chapter into two separate parts, since I think that the story will flow better that way.

Thank you so much to all the people who have reviewed this story. You have no idea how a couple of sentences about my writing can totally turn my whole day around.

Anyway,, I hope that you enjoy this next installment!

I Don't Know How

Part Two

"No really, it's okay Cat. I get it," I say into my phone for the third time, sighing. "Just be careful with this Evan guy. You don't know anything about him," I can't help but caution her. I can't believe that Vega's stupid blond experiment worked and Cat managed to pick up a random guy after two minutes of being alone at Nozu. "Just promise me you won't gush all about it tomorrow. I don't feel like dealing with Vega's gloating. I had to deal with enough of her bullshit since you stuck me alone with her at Nozu."

"Are you sure you don't need me there? Maybe Evan and I should come and- "

"No!" I interrupt her, not wanting to be forced to make small talk with my best friend's boy toy of the month. "I mean…..Andre should be here any minute, so it's not a big deal."

"Thanks Jade, you're the best!" Cat giggles into the phone, and I punch the end call button and slam my phone down on the table and angrily take a couple large gulps from the rum and coke the older guys in the band had bought for me, before dialing Andre's phone number AGAIN.

"H-"

"Where the fuck are you Andre?!" I hiss into the phone the second I hear that someone answers it. "You promised me you would be here. The band is all ready for me to perform my new song tonight- remember? And we are supposed to go onstage in like fifteen minutes! I know it's only one song, but I've never sang anything like this before…...you know- something that I wrote everything for all by myself? And you swore you wouldn't miss-"

"Um, Jade?" I hear a voice interrupt me, and my heart stops when my mind registers the fact that although I easily recognize the voice on the other end of the line- it definitely isn't Andre's.

"Beck?! Why the fuck are you answering Andre's phone?!"

"Because at the moment he is climbing on the rafters over the Blackbox Theater, trying to get to his Grandma's stupid bird. We've been stuck at school chasing this damn thing for hours," Beck answers me.

"Well…..you...you don't just answer someone else's phone Beck!" I yell at him, flustered. "And…..and if you DO, then you tell the person immediately that you aren't the person they called," I down the rest of my drink and signal to my band mates that I need another one.

"This is like the fifth time you've called in ten minutes. I figured I should make sure that everything was okay," Beck says using his soothing tone, attempting to calm me down. "I would never forgive myself if there was some kind of an emergency, or you were hurt or something, and I could have done something to help, if I'd only answered Andre's phone."

It's been awhile since I've heard him talk to me like that, like he actually gives a shit about me. I wince at the stab of longing I feel after I realize that maybe because he caught me off guard, it's the first time that I have allowed myself to hear the caring tone.

"Everything is fi-"

"Wait- you said that you're performing tonight?" Beck cuts me off, his soothing tone gone, and now his voice is filled with confusion. "But it's Thursday. You told me that you only play at The Gorrilla Club on the weekends. You didn't switch performance nights because of my film did you?"

"Of course not!" I instantly reply, annoyed that he thinks I have enough influence over Ryder and the others in the band to make a decision like that.

"Are you sure?" Beck asks, and I can tell from the teasing tone in his voice that he's grinning. An image of him grinning and poking me in my sides while he's busy teasing me flashes in my head, and something in me snaps.

"We booked a gig at The Intersection tonight," I tell him. "It has NOTHING to do with your stupid fucking film. Sorry to burst your super inflated ego Oliver."

"Why didn't you tell us about it? The Intersection's kind of a big deal," Beck asks after a moment.

"I did tell a couple people," I say, taking whatever drink Ryder hands to me and silently mouth the words thank you to him as he plops down on the table next to me.

"Oh…..so you just specifically kept it from me then," Beck says quietly, and is that hurt I hear in his voice? No…..I must be imagining things.

"Look, only Andre and Cat know, and since I don't think either of them are coming tonight it doesn't even matter," I say, a bit flustered. I had never intended on telling Beck anything about tonight, and I'm not even sure how this entire conversation happened.

Damn that stupid bird!

"Jade, we need to talk about the set," Ryder says loud enough for Beck to overhear on his end of the phone. I narrow my eyes at him, knowing that he did it on purpose.

"I gotta go. Look, I'll see you tomorrow," I say quickly and hang up my phone and throw it onto the table with a sigh, and take another big drink of the long island iced tea Ryder brought me. I can't help but make a face at how strong it is, and look at Ryder raising my eyebrows.

"It looked like you needed something stronger than your usual," he shrugged. I just nod my head once in agreement and take another sip. "So why didn't you tell your friends about tonight?" he asks me curiously.

"Honestly?" I ask him, wondering why I'm considering telling Ryder fucking Daniels anything. I may have agreed to sing in his band, but that doesn't mean I trust him.

"Wouldn't be much point in telling me a lie, would there?" he smirks, finishing the beer in his hand and loudly setting the empty bottle on the table.

"Life's been...sucking lately, for awhile now actually. And I've been working on Oliver's stupid film project, which wouldn't be a big deal, except…." I stop talking and shut my eyes, attempting to block the unwanted memory from replaying in my head.

"Except?"

"Except I don't know how, um...nothing," I open my eyes and quickly take another drink. "I just don't feel like I've got the energy to be compared to Vega AGAIN tonight. Which is exactly what will happen. It always does."

"Compared to Vega?" Ryder chuckles. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm tired of coming in second place to her," I surprise both Daniels and myself by this admission.

"Second place?"

"Nothing I ever do is going to be better than perfect Vega," I say bitterly, thinking of how I've just accepted the fact that I will always remain in the shadows. "She just got to perform a song she wrote at the Platinum Music Awards a couple weeks ago. Millions of people watched it," I pause, swallowing down the lump that is rising in my throat, knowing that I was this close to having done it in her place. If only I hadn't seen...well, never mind. It doesn't matter now. "We've got what," I look around the venue quickly, "a couple hundred people here at most? I don't need a bunch of people here silently comparing the difference," I explain to Ryder. "I honestly wouldn't have even told Andre or Cat about it, but I needed Andre to sing with me and Cat overheard us rehearsing together."

"The song you wrote is so much better than the one Tori performed," Ryder assures me. "I'm not going to lie, Vega's voice is good. Really good. I mean, why do you think I tried to con her into performing with me last year?" he asks, and I can't help but roll my eyes and smirk at the memory of Ryder wandering around the stage in utter confusion while Vega sang the song we all helped write. "But your voice….your voice is on another level. And once people hear this song you wrote, they are-"

"We aren't doing my song tonight," I tell him firmly, and quickly take another large drink and draining my glass.

"Why the hell not?"

"Because I don't think Andre's going to be able to make it," I answer him. "There's a…...situation. With a-with a bird. Don't ask."

"Okay. So Andre can't sing it with you tonight. What about me? I bet I know it just as well as Andre does," Ryder says turning towards me. "We already know that our voices mesh well together."

"Thanks, but I don't think so. It's not like it's that good of a song anyway," I tell him. "You can stop lying to me about it. Besides, it's a lot different than the band's normal stuff-"

"Jade," Ryder interrupts me. "It's an amazing song. The band spent all week learning it. It's not fair for you to pull it last minute when I can step in for Andre. Besides," Ryder says, glancing towards the side of the stage, where the other band members are beckoning us. "Looks like it's showtime," he says with a smirk, taking the empty glass from my hand and setting it on the table.

A/N: Please, please review and let me know what you think!