Bella had never really had what most people in Forks would consider a normal childhood. She knew that. Until age 5 she had lived in Barstow, California, a place she would die before returning to. Her family consisted of her brother, Brian, her almost-father Charlie, Rome, and a mother that drifted in and out of the edges of her reality, whose presence meant fear and pain and hunger, either due to her drinking or the men that she brought along. But those times never lasted long. Charlie would always be there after a couple of days, herding her and Brian over to his one-bedroom apartment that was always clean and warm and filled with food, and Rome would always be there to make her smile and give her hugs.

Charlie and Brian and Rome were her constants during that time. She knew that they cared about her, and they would always be there for her. And then her biological mother moved them to Tucson. She had cried so hard when they had to leave Charlie and Rome, but Tucson had brought her Renee. And for the first time, Bella had someone to act like a mom. Renee loved nothing more than to play with her, and do her hair, and take her to ballet class. Brian and Charlie were great, but they were always more concerned with making sure that she was fed and clean then playing make believe with her or doting on her or taking her out shopping.

When Brian got put in juvie when she was 7, and her biological mom died, she finally got to live with Renee full time. For three wonderful years, Bella got to live as the focus of Renee's world. And sure, she usually had to take care of things like the bills and learning to cook, but she didn't really mind. It was worth it to have food in the house and someone that was always there.

Even after Brian was released from juvie at age 18, Bella stayed with Renee. But then Brian had gotten a job as a police officer and had been awarded custody of her again. Officially, it had been Charlie that had been her guardian during the three years that she had lived with Renee, but she had only seen him during the summer and holidays. And he decided that since Brian now had a stable job and a good apartment, that it was time for her to come home. She loved getting to see her brother again, but she had just wished that she hadn't had to leave Renee. Part of her resented Charlie and Brian for taking her away from Renee, but most of her was just happy to be a part of their strange little world again. Sure, Rome was no longer there, and when she asked about him Brian got angry and refused to talk, but she could live with that. So long as her brother didn't leave her again, she would put up with anything.

She should have known that it couldn't last. Charlie had left them to return to his real home, walking out of her life once again. And then, not even three years after Brian had dragged her back to California, he was shipping her off again. Even after he had promised that he would never leave her again, even after he promised that they would always be a family. So back to Tucson and Renee she went, a little bit more jaded, a little bit warier about accepting this place as home.

It wasn't even that big of a shock when Brian turned his back on the law, and by extension her. He had left her so many times before, it had seemed inevitable. It just hurt her that he had chosen to leave her for a new family, after all the times he had sworn that she and Charlie were all the family he would ever need.

So, at 14, her family that she had once thought invincible, was shredded and scattered. Her big brother Rome refused to acknowledge her existence. Charlie seemed content with the weird half-relationship that they had, where they simply passed through the other's lives on occasion. And Brian had thrown her away for a group of criminals. The only reliable person she had was the flighty Renee, who was more of a fun aunt than a responsible mom. And even that wasn't the same as it had been 3 years ago. Renee ws dating now, and she didn't have the time for Bella that she had when the younger girl was 6 and just over for a visit.

Now at age 17, Bella had to admit that she didn't even really have Renee anymore. They had talked for maybe 10 minutes when her plane had landed in Seattle, but not since. And she may have Charlie now, but she didn't know how to open up to him. The past two days had been spent in awkward silences and stilted conversations. Two weeks together every summer wasn't enough to truly forge a real relationship between the two of them. The news about Brian's attack on the prison bus in California hadn't helped anything either. There were times when she felt sure that Charlie knew more about Brian then what he had shared with her in the past 3 years. And Bella wasn't sure if she was willing to give Charlie the opportunity to come clean and try to build something new between them.

Sitting in her new-old car in the parking lot of Forks High School, Bella took a deep breath and steeled her nerves. She only had to get through a year and a half here in Forks. Once she graduated, she would be able to take the trust that Charlie had set up for her after her biological mother had died and make a life for herself.

"18 months. I can take 18 months of this" Bella thought to herself as she shouldered her bag and headed for the front office. "18 months, and I'll be free to live my life."

Racing Twilight

Practically crawling into her truck at the end of the day, Bella wasn't sure if she could live up to her determination of this morning. She had been stared at, poked, prodded, and examined all day. And then Edward Cullen had acted like she was a mass murderer when she hadn't even spoken a single word to him! All she wanted was to be left alone, to fade into the background of this place for the short time that she would be here, and she wasn't even allowed to do that. She had hoped that the normality of high school would help give her a sense of balance, of stability in the mess that was currently her life, but it looked like she would have to look elsewhere.

Sighing, she allowed herself one more moment of self-pity before heading for Charlie's. She had slipped up a couple of times today and called him by his first name in conversation, which led to some awkward conversations about their relationship with the nosy teenagers that had swarmed her all day. She would have to remember to get better about that. Renee had never pushed for her to call her "mom", saying that their relationship didn't need to be defined in that way, that as long as the two of them understood what they meant to each other, then what did it matter what they called each other? Their neighbors had simply accepted it as Renee's free-spirited approach to parenting and let them be. Bella thought that she wouldn't be as lucky here in small-town Forks.

Pulling into the driveway, she made sure to collect the mail before heading into the house to start dinner. She had been in more advanced classes in Phoenix, so she was ahead of the curve here in Forks. She knew that she could repurpose some old projects for her classes here, and that her other homework wouldn't take her very long at all. Sorting out the mail, she considered what to make for dinner. She knew that Charlie, like Renee and Brian, wasn't much of a cook, so if she wanted something edible, she would have to be in charge of the kitchen.

Stacking Charlie's mail separately from the bills, she idly wondered who he knew in Chihuahua, Mexico that would be sending him packages. Shrugging, she started pulling together the ingredients for dinner, dismissing the package from her mind. It wasn't really her place to be curious about Charlie's life. She was only here for the next 18 months anyway.