Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.
Was originally written to cheer up a friend and posted on my tumblr, now posted here with minor edits. Just letting you know I'm still alive! Not, alas, doing science, and writing ever-so-slowly, but alive and writing.
"Hey 'Mano, have you seen my lucky socks?"
Lovino looked up from the couch where he lay reading to see his husband, Alfred, leaning over the back of it to stare at him hopefully. He raised an eyebrow. "Did you check the sock drawer?"
"Not yet," Alfred admitted, leaning on folded arms. "I thought I'd ask you first, you always know where stuff is."
That made Lovino roll his eyes. "Idiot." He responded, returning his attention to his book. "Check the sock drawer first, and if you can't find them there then ask me."
"'Kay." Alfred pushed off the couch and left the room in search of his elusive footwear, and Lovino resumed reading. After a while Alfred called from the bedroom, "They're not in the drawer!"
"Check the hamper!" Lovino called back. He heard Alfred bustle around in the next room, and then silence.
"...Babe?" Alfred called hesitantly down the hall. "I thought Beppe was a boy cat?"
"He is." Lovino answered absently from the living room.
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I'm sure, what the fuck kind of question is that. He's got balls, idiot. You've seen them."
"Okay." A pause. "Well, do Italian cats ever switch genders?"
Lovino screwed up his face, and looked over at the door which led to the hall which led to the bedroom. "What the fuck? No! Of course they don't! What the fuck are you talking about?"
"...I think you'd better come see this for yourself."
Curious now, Lovino set his book down and clambered off the couch, heading to see what the heck was making Alfred act so weird.
He found his husband kneeling next the hamper in the closet, hovering over it and staring into it with a puzzled, curious expression. The blond looked up when he entered and quirked an eyebrow, waving him over. "You gotta see this." He said quietly, obviously trying not to disturb whatever was inside.
Cautiously, Lovino approached, leaning over next to his husband to peer into the wicker basket. There, nestled on top of a pile of dirty clothes, lay his cat, Giuseppe (Beppe for short). His male cat. Who was industriously licking a small, mewling furry ball curled up against his stomach.
He blinked. "Is that..."
"It's a kitten." Alfred confirmed, still speaking in hushed tones. Lovino's brows furrowed, and he got down on his knees next to his boyfriend to make a closer examination of the new addition. The tiny creature was young, apparently only recently born. It looked as though its eyes hadn't even started to open, yet. Its ridiculously fuzzy (and gleamingly clean, thanks to Giuseppe's ministrations) baby fur was the same shade of fawn as Giuseppe's, too- though minus Giuseppe's brown patches. He reached cautiously into the basket, intending to pick the kitten up, and Giuseppe gave him a warning look.
"I won't hurt it," he reassured the older cat, "I promise." He reached in slowly, making it clear that he meant no harm, and gently scooped the kitten up under Giuseppe's watchful eye.
It barely fit into his palm, a tiny ball of fur and heat, and he visibily melted, petting its tiny head with a fingertip.
"Aww," Alfred melted too beside him, and leaned closer to touch the kitten as well, still speaking in a whisper. "It's so cute!"
Giuseppe, watching them both alertly, chirred pointedly.
"Yeah, okay." Lovino nodded, also speaking in hushed tones as he lowered the kitten back, placing it gently next to the anxious cat, who sniffed it protectively. "There's your baby."
They watched the pair, mesmerized, for a few moments, staying silent more out of a desire not to disturb the peaceful scene than an urge not to speak.
"Where the hell did it come from?" Lovino wondered quietly.
"I don't know. You don't think...?"
"It's not possible." Lovino said doubtfully. The kitten did look an awful lot like Giuseppe...
"Then what is..." The door swung open as he spoke, and Alfred glanced over reflexively at the motion, and the words died on his lips. Seeing his reaction Lovino looked too. They both watched in dumbfounded silence as Alfred's cat, Armstrong, padded purposefully into the room, carrying another tiny, dark ball of fur in his mouth. The large white-and black Maine Coon cross ignored them completely, going around their legs and leaping up to balance on the edge of the hamper, where he, with great care, deposited the new kitten next to Giuseppe. That done he examined the other kitten, and touched noses with Giuseppe before leaping down from the basket and leaving the room.
The two men looked at the departing cat, then each other. "What the fuck?" Said Lovino.
"I'd better follow him." Alfred said, his hero-instincts tingling. Lovino nodded as his husband started after the cat, and turned his own attention back to the hamper, where Giuseppe was now engrossed in washing the new kitten. The first one had fallen asleep, nuzzled deep in the soft fur of the older cat's belly.
Ten minutes or so later Alfred returned with Armstrong and another kitten cupped in his hands. Lovino took one look at his boyfriend's expression, and reached to take the kitten. "What's wrong?"
"Someone just left them. In a box, by the side of the road." Alfred explained, clearly upset as he handed the kitten to Lovino. "They were all alone. Anything could have happened to them! They could have been killed! What kind of person would do that?"
"I don't know." Lovino's frown matched his husband's as he looked down at the orphaned kitten he clutched protectively to his chest. It nuzzled his shirt blindly, tiny eyes closed tight, and opened its little pink mouth in a mewl. A surge of mingled protectiveness and sadness— along with anger at whomever would leave these innocent, helpless babies out to die that way— filled him, pricking at his eyes. "People are assholes." He growled, blinking back tears.
He felt a paw placed gently on his knee, and he looked down to see Armstrong staring concernedly up at him with wide blue eyes.
"Meaahw." Armstrong purred comfortingly. He wiped his eyes, pulling himself together, and looked to see both cats staring at him and the kitten.
"You're right," he told the cats. "At least they're safe now. We'll give them a good home." He said determinedly, looking back down at the tiny kitten he held.
"Mrrrrr..." Giuseppe chirruped pointedly, and Lovino huffed a laugh, bending down to place the kitten next to the others. Giuseppe wasted no time in attending to business, and Armstrong leapt up into the basket was well, trying to squeeze in next to kittens and cat. He was a big cat— not fat, but built on a bigger scale than his companion, and long-furred— so it was tricky, and Giuseppe swatted him a few times when he jostled them a bit in his attempts to settle in, but soon they were all curled up together and both adults were contentedly purring, Giuseppe licking the kittens and Armstrong licking the kittens and Giuseppe.
"I guess we're all daddies now." Alfred crouched next to the basket to stare fondly at their cats and kittens, and smiled up at his husband. "I told you I'd give you babies someday." He teased.
"Idiot." Lovino snorted, fondly swatting the back of his husband's head. "You didn't even find them. Armstrong did."
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Alfred admitted, reaching into the basket to scratch Armstrong's head. "Good job, Armstrong. Bringin' home the babies. You're our little hero."
Armstrong purred contentedly at him, and Alfred went to pet Giuseppe, too. "And you too, Beppe, nice work cleaning 'em up. You're both heroes, yes you are!" Giuseppe lifted his head to bat Alfred's hand away, annoyed at the intrusion when he was trying to get the kittens all washed and settled in. "Sorry, sorry. I'll let you work." Alfred apologised, amused, as he withdrew his hand.
"C'mon, Alfredo, let's let them be" Lovino sighed, reluctant to leave the adorable sight, but there was work to be done. "Let's go to the kitchen and heat up some milk."
"Why?" Alfred glanced up, puzzled.
Lovino gave him a look. "Because the kittens will be hungry, idiot." He said, shooing his husband out of the room. "And Giuseppe and Armstrong are boy cats."
"Oh, right." Alfred grinned sheepishly, ruffling his hair. "Then I guess I'd better go out and get some bottles at the pet store.
"That's a good idea." Lovino nodded in agreement. "Make sure they're small enough for kittens. And hurry. Who knows how long since they last ate." He added, kissing Alfred's cheek and patting his behind to wish him luck on his trip to the store.
"I will." Alfred promised, kissing him back, and headed out to the car, while Lovino headed to the kitchen.
Alfred returned forty-five minutes later, loaded with kitten-sized bottles (tiny little things that Lovino wasn't sure at first would be sufficient, but they said 'for kittens' right on the packaging, so he dubiously accepted it), along with a bagful of cans of powdered milk formula designed especially for kittens, an extra litter box and toys 'to help with development'. He also had a couple of pamphlets full of information about raising orphaned kittens, which he read out loud to Lovino as the Italian washed the bottles to sterilize them and filled them with milk.
Giuseppe wasn't too pleased when they tried to 'horn in' on his parenting to feed the kittens, growling and swatting them when they tried to reach into the hamper. Armstrong was more amenable though, and helped calm him down by sitting on him, pinning him down with his larger frame and licking him thoroughly until Giuseppe saw that the kittens weren't going to be harmed in any way. The two older cats watched alertly until the feeding was done— Giuseppe keeping a sharp eye on his humans and kittens and Armstrong more curious about the process in general, coming up to sniff the bottles and kittens and their hands. But when Alfred tried to keep the kitten he held for a while after its bottle was put down, Armstrong drew the line, pointedly butting his hand out of the way to grasp the kitten in his mouth, carrying it to Giuseppe in the basket. Lovino snorted at them both, but learned from this and returned the kittens he held promptly after they were done, to Giuseppe's satisfaction.
"So what are we going to name them?" Alfred asked as they gathered the bottles and rose from the floor.
"I don't know." Lovino answered, and frowned as a thought occurred to him. "Maybe we shouldn't."
"Why not?"
"Because we'll have to find them new homes pretty soon." Lovino explained, following him out the door on their way to the kitchen to wash up. "Maybe we should let the people who adopt them give them names."
Alfred fumbled the bottles, nearly dropping them, and stared at Lovino with wide eyes. "We're not keeping them? But they're our babies!"
Lovino stared back, pursing his lips in a frown. "We can't keep them, bastard." He asserted, frown deepening. Truthfully, he didn't want to give them up any more than Alfred did. They'd only had the kittens for a few hours, but already the two had grown deeply attached. But, "The city limit here is 3 cats."
"Oh." Alfred's face fell, and he dropped the bottles into the sink. "I guess maybe we should start looking for good homes, then." He decided.
"Yeah." Lovino stared at the bottles, frowning.
"Maybe we can give them to family." Alfred suggested, turning on the water and grabbing a sponge. "That way we'll know how they're doing, and we can see them sometimes."
"That's not a bad idea," Lovino agreed, moving next to him to help dry. "And that way if they didn't take good care of the little bastards we could kick their asses."
"Haha, yeah." Alfred grinned, handing him the last bottle. "Nobody fucks with our babies and gets away with it."
"Damn right." Lovino smirked, drying it with a towel. "But let's not worry about it too much yet." He added, lining it up on the counter next to the others. "We can't give them away until at least after they're weaned, anyway, so we have lots of time yet."
"Yeah." Alfred agreed, bumping their shoulders together. "That won't be for a long while."
They shared a smile, feeling a lot more cheerful in the knowledge that they wouldn't have to say goodbye to their new babies for some time yet.
Time passed quickly, though, as it often does. Soon the kittens eyes were opened, and shortly after that they'd grown enough to be constantly underfoot and in everything, scampering across the floor and over the furniture and up Alfred and Lovino's legs, play-wrestling with Armstrong (who was surprisingly gentle with them, and loved letting the kittens 'defeat' him, allowing them to pile on top of them and gnaw fiercely on his fur and ears as he 'collapsed' on his side in a possum-esque heap); dropping in the middle of their play for random naps and rising just as quickly to do it all over again, and all-in-all driving poor Giuseppe to exhaustion trying to keep them corralled and washed.
Alfred and Lovino tried not to notice when the kittens started showing more and more interest in their feline parents' solid food as the weeks passed.
"We're going to have to wean them soon." Alfred said subduedly, cradling the kitten he was bottle feeding.
Lovino looked up from his own kittens, both sprawled contentedly in his lap eagerly nursing their bottles, and said nothing.
"They're almost eight weeks." Alfred continued after a moment. "They're supposed to be weaned around seven to ten weeks."
"They're too young." Lovino said shortly. Alfred looked at him.
Lovino looked back. "They're not ready." He defended. "Some kittens grow up slower. We don't want to rush them."
"Yeah." Alfred agreed, looking back down at the kitten in his arms. "That's true."
"It says here kittens should be weaned no later than twelve weeks." Alfred said later, sitting at the table reading from the pamphlets after their own dinner was finished. "Or it can cause nutritional and socialization issues."
"Why do you keep bringing this up?" Lovino scowled, loading the dishes into the dishwasher with a little more force than was strictly necessary. "I thought you didn't want to give them away, bastard."
"I don't. But I don't want to do what's not good for them, either." Alfred sighed, setting down the pamphlet. "I was hoping it would say that we could keep them longer." He rubbed his face. "But, it does say that even though you can wean them at seven weeks it's best not to wean them completely before at least ten weeks." He added. "So that's something."
Lovino grunted, shutting the dishwasher and turning it on. One of the kittens scampered into the kitchen, climbing up his leg. "Hey," he said, scooping it up for cuddles. "What're you doing, little idiot." It purred at him, butting his chin with its head. Alfred smiled.
The doorbell rang.
"Can you get that? I'm busy." Lovino said, playing with the cat.
"Sure thing." Alfred rose and left the kitchen, returning a short while later with their guest in tow— Gilbert, their mutual sort-of brother-in-law (since he was Lovino's brother's boyfriend's big brother, and Alfred's brother's boyfriend, in an impressive attempt at an alliterative state-of-relation).
"It's Gil," Alfred announced unnecessarily, since Lovino had eyes.
"Hey," Gilbert waved, sauntering into the kitchen after Alfred. "I'm just here to borrow your crepe pan. I used Mattie's for— Oh hey, haHAHA! LOOKIT YOU!" This was to the kitten which had darted out from under the table to mount a fearsome attack on his shoelaces. "Tough guy, eh?" He scooped the kitten up, tickling its tummy, and laughed when it swatted his nose. "Oh? OH? You think you can beat my awesome self?" He asked, cradling it in his arms like a baby and playing with its paws as it batted at his fingers. "Who do you think you are, Friedrich the Great? AHAHAHA!"
"Don't be so rough with him, bastard." Lovino demanded, hefting the kitten he held and preparing to intervene.
"It's alright, he LIKES IT!" Prussia countered, ruffling the kitten's fawn-colored fur. "Don'tcha, DONTCHA? WAHAhaha."
"He does seem to like it," Alfred observed, watching with amused interest.
Indeed, the little kitten was purring loud enough to be heard all through the kitchen. Lovino scowled, turning to rummage through the cupboard for the crepe pan. "Here," he said, crossing the floor and thrusting it at their alliterative relation. "Here. Now you can GO AWAY."
"Oh, thanks." Prussia shifted the kitten in his arms and took the pan, tucking it under his arm so he could resume playing. "When did you guys get kittens, anyway?"
"A couple months ago," Alfred informed him. "Giuseppe and Armstrong brought home some orphaned kittens."
"Orphans, eh?" Prussia ruffled the kitten's ears. "No wonder you're so tough! You gotta be a tough without any parents. And you are, aren'tcha? He's a FIGHTER! HA!"
"They have parents." Lovino asserted, narrowing his eyes. "Alfred and I have been raising them. And the cats, too. They're fine."
"I can see that," Prussia agreed, poking a round belly. "Little chubby, eh Friedrich? Al been feeding you hamburgers?" Before Lovino could protest again he continued. "Hey, you got a home for this little guy yet? Now that Mattie and I have our own place we've been thinkin' of gettin' a pet, and I'm kinda fallin' in love with this awesome little bastard." He hefted the kitten up, nuzzling its tummy. "Yes you are AWESOME aren't you Friedrich? AREN'T YOU, hakesesese~."
Alfred and Lovino exchanged a glance, and a mental conversation. Lovino scowled. Alfred quirked an eyebrow. Lovino looked away, jaw tightening. Alfred turned to Prussia, who'd missed all this in playing with the kitten.
"They're not ready to wean yet," Alfred said, "but if Mattie agrees you should be able to pick him up in two weeks."
"That's fine," Prussia agreed, focused on the cat. "That'll give me time to get everything set up for little Friedrich. Mattie's gonna LOVE YOU, yes he IS!" He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone, snapping a picture of the kitten in his arms. "Okay little man, daddy's gotta go." He said as he slid the phone back into his pocket, kissing the cat on the nose and setting it down. "I'll SEE YOU IN TWO WEEKS!" He waved, turning to go. The kitten followed him to the door and pawed it, mewling, after he'd gone. Lovino watched it, crossing his arms and screwing up his face.
"Aw, c'mon." Alfred said, seeing this, and gathered him him in his arms, kissing the top of his head. "We knew it had to happen eventually, right? At least he's going to a good home." He soothed, rubbing hishusband's back. Lovino buried his face in Alfred's chest, eyes and nose stinging.
"They're our babies." He protested, sniffling.
"I know." Alfred kissed his hair, squeezing him. "I know. But we'll still see him, right? And you know Mattie'll take good care of him. And Gil's gonna spoil him rotten."
"I guess." Lovino muttered.
"And if he doesn't, we can pound him flat." Alfred added.
Lovino smiled.
A few days later, they had another unexpected visitor. "Gilbert told us you had kittens!" Feliciano wasted no time announcing the reason for his visit the moment they opened the door. "I want to see!"
"Don't you already have two cats?" Lovino asked, closing the door behind his brother.
"Yes, we do!" Feliciano agreed, following his brother down the hall to the living room, where Alfred was playing with their little cat family. "But I want to get one for Kiku. Tama-chan gets lonely when Kiku's at work, and I think he needs a friend."
"Hn." Lovino pursed his lips, thinking. He didn't mind Kiku, the man was reasonable and gentle, and one of Alfred's friends as well as his brother's.
"Oooohhhaaawwww they're adorable!" Feliciano squealed upon seeing the kittens, and threw himself onto the floor to see them up close. They swarmed the new arrival, crawling all over him, while he giggled and squirmed. Giuseppe and Armstrong, curled up together nearby, opened their eyes to see what all the noise was about, but it was only Feliciano, who was harmless; so they went back to sleep. "Oh this one's perfect!" Feliciano exclaimed, catching up one of the kittens. "She's got little white paws like Kiku's kitty Tama," he pointed, beaming, "and brown fur like my Gino and grey fur like Ludwig's Wilhelm! It's like they all had a baby together!"
Alfred laughed. "Don't you already have two cats though? You sure Wilhelm can handle it? Gino's kind of a handful." He grinned, correcting, "Or, pawful."
"Oh, it's not for me and Ludwig." Feliciano explained, rolling onto his back and placing the kitten on his chest. "I want to get Kiku a friend for Tama."
"Oh," Alfred said, considering, and nodded. "That isn't a bad idea. Tama's alone most of the day while he's at work, right? He could use a friend." He reached out, tickling the kitten's ear. "And she's pretty chill for a kitten, too, so she should fit right in."
"No more lonely Tama, ve~! He has a friend!" Feliciano smiled, rubbing the kitten's ears. It closed its eyes, purring. "I'll call her Precious!"
"Shouldn't she have a Japanese name?" Alfred suggested, amused.
"Oh, you're right. Sakura!"
"Did you ask Kiku if he wants another cat?" Lovino asked, petting the sleeping cats on the couch.
"No, I wanted it to be a surprise." Feliciano answered, tickling the kitten under the chin, and gigged when one of the others nibbled his ear.
Lovino frowned. "You should ask first." He pointed out. "What if he doesn't want a kitten? It's a big responsibility, bastard."
"Nobody doesn't want a kitten." Feliciano said resolutely, making kissy-faces at the kittens.
"Yeah, but kittens turn into cats." Alfred said reasonably. "Lovino's right. You should ask Kiku first, and see if he wants another pet. Surprises are nice, but surprise pets aren't always a good idea. It's a lot of responsibility to spring on someone."
Feliciano pouted for a moment, but nodded. "Okay." He agreed. "I'll ask Kiku first. And he can come and meet her for himself, ve~. He'll want her, I'm sure!"
"Well if he does, he can pick her up in two weeks." Alfred said. "She'll be weaned by then. Right, 'Mano?"
"Yeah, that's okay." Lovino agreed, nodding only a little reluctantly.
"Okay~." Feliciano reached up to pet another kitten. "I wish we could keep them all, but with the cats and Ludwig's dog's we're already at the legal limit." He sighed, sitting up, and smiled. "But I can play with you all for a while, ve~!"
After some consideration, Kiku decided he did want another cat. He visited that weekend, and as Feliciano had anticipated, he fell in love with the gentle, tricolored kitten Feliciano had chosen for him, and made arrangements to pick her up at the end of a week and a half. (He did not, however, fall in love with the names Feliciano had chosen, opting instead to name her 'Mika').
Even though they both liked and trusted Kiku to take good care of Mika, the thought of giving another of their kittens away wasn't much easier the second time, and they spent the evening cuddling on the couch with the cats trying not to dwell on it and reminding each other that they saw Kiku pretty often, and sometimes babysat Tama when Kiku went out of town, so obviously they'd see Mika sometimes, too. It wasn't like they were really saying goodbye.
And they still had a week and a half with their babies, right?
Another four days passed, and the kittens were mostly eating solid food— cooked by Lovino, fresh fish or chicken or liver at every meal. With food like that they were weaned rather fast, much preferring Lovino's gourmet meals to plain milk. It was a bittersweet feeling watching them grow so quickly, but he liked seeing them eating his cooking with so much relish.
"No." Alfred said firmly, arms crossed.
"But—"
"No." Lovino scowled, arms likewise crossed. "Absolutely not, bastard."
"Just—"
"I wouldn't trust you with a pet rock, let alone a kitten." Alfred said.
"Now—"
"You think I'm going to let you poison one of our babies with your terrible cooking?" Lovino demanded.
"Mew?" The final kitten, a little tabby with bright green eyes, stuck its head between the legs of the two men to see what was going on.
"Why, hello—"
"Stay away from the bad man, baby." Alfred looked down, nudging it back with a foot. "We'll protect you."
"Oh for— would you two please be reasonable." Arthur threw his arms in the air, frustrated. "You're acting like I'm some terrible kitten-eating monster."
"I've eaten your cooking." Alfred said dryly, looking back up.
"We're not going to put any kittens through that." Lovino agreed firmly.
"It won't even be eating my cooking!" Arthur protested. "Not that there's anything wrong with my cooking," he added, sniffing offendedly, "but Francis does most of the cooking, now. And when he doesn't, Antonio does. They won't even let me in the kitchen anymore." He added under his breath, sulking slightly.
"Good for them." Lovino approved, and Alfred nodded wholeheartedly.
The kitten pushed between their legs again, interested in seeing the newcomer. Alfred nudged it back.
"I still wouldn't trust you to take care of a cat." Alfred reiterated. "Let alone a kitten. It's a baby. They need lots of care. And attention. And love and affection."
"I know that, I'm not an idiot." Arthur scowled. "I'm perfectly capable of providing those things."
Alfred and Lovino snorted simultaneously. The kitten pushed its way between their legs again, tumbling over Lovino's shoes. He nudged it back.
"And even if I wasn't capable— which I am—" Arthur continued, "it's not like I'm the only one around the house to attend to the creature."
Lovino narrowed his eyes, offended at having one of his babies referred to as a 'creature'. Alfred was bothered less, having been referred to as much worse by his old guardian; but neither of them were moved.
Arthur sighed, rufffling his hair. "If it helps, it's not even for me." He admitted. "I mean, I'd quite like a cat, if it came down to it, and so would Francis, but the main reason we've decided to get one is for Antonio's sake."
"What do you mean?" Lovino frowned. Alfred nudged the kitten back again, and it mao'd in protest.
"Well, it's like this," Arthur said, cheeks flushing a little as he layed it all out, "Francis and I can get quite busy at work sometimes— myself more than Francis, of course, but during his busy season his business can take up all of his time. And Antonio...well, Antonio's home all alone most of the day at those times. He gets...lonely. So Francis and I thought it might be nice if he had a pet to keep him company. And we're all rather fond of cats, so it seemed the ideal choice. And with our anniversary coming up, well...we'd thought to surprise him." He paused to gauge their reactions, and seeing Lovino's considering frown, followed it up with, "So I wouldn't even be taking care of it, most of the time. Antonio would. Francis and I would do our part, of course, we shan't neglect the creature, but most of its time will be spent home with Antonio."
Alfred pursed his lips consideringly, and turned to Lovino. "It's up to you." He said, knowing Lovino's fondness for his oldest friend.
Lovino frowned deeper. He didn't care for Arthur at all, and didn't like Francis much, either, but he hated thinking of Antonio being lonely...
The kitten pushed its way through their legs, bounding determinedly up to the Englishman, going up on its hindpaws to put its forepaws on his legs and mewled up at him. He looked surprised for a moment, then blushed, kneeling down a little awkwardly to pet it. "Hello, puss," he said softly, looking flattered at its attention. "You're a fine fellow, aren't you." His eyes widened, mesmerized when it leaned its head into his touch affectionately, and gave a little purring mewl, and they both saw him fall in love with the tiny creature.
"Well, fuck." Alfred said, a little dismayed, and Lovino agreed wholeheartedly.
"Alright bastard." He said. "You can pick him up in a week. But you'd better take good care of him, or..."
"Of course." Arthur nodded, and looked up at them, smiling. "Thank you. Both of you."
Alfred sighed, leaning against the doorframe, smiling a little resignedly. "So what're you going to call him?"
"I'm not sure." Arthur looked down at the little kitten, stroking it gently. "Bard, perhaps. For Shakespeare."
Alfred rolled his eyes. "Of course."
"You'd better take good care of them, bastards!" Lovino yelled, hanging out of the door.
"Call if anything goes wrong!" Alfred called, waving. "Or if you have any questions! Anytime of the day or night!"
"Bard doesn't like goose liver!" Lovino yelled. "And Mika's scared of thunderstorms, got it? And Friedrich likes to be sung to sleep!"
"Don't hesitate to let us know if you have any problems!" Alfred called. "If you decide it's too much for you and you can't take care of them, we'll take them back, okay?"
"They like to be cuddled, okay?" Lovino yelled, wiping his eyes. "And, and, they'll need to sleep with you at night!"
"Goodbye, babies!" Alfred called, voice breaking a little. "We'll miss you!"
"We'll take good care of him, I promise." Matthew assured him, smiling as he opened the car door.
"Yeah, sure thing!" Gilbert affirmed, already in the passenger seat, playing with the kitten in his arms. "HE'S GONNA LOVE LIVING IN OUR AWESOME HOUSE!"
Kiku only smiled sympathetically as he pulled the seatbelt over Mika's cat carrier to secure it. "I'll send you pictures," he said, waving goodbye, "and update her status on my blog, so you'll know how she is doing."
"Don't worry about a thing, Lovi!" Antonio called, nuzzling his kitten. "I'll take good care of Bard, you'll see! He's so cuuute! I'll feed him lots of treats every day! And all the cream he can drink!"
"If you do that he's going to get fat." Francis told him, smiling as he leaned over Antonio's shoulder to tickle the kitten's ears.
"That would be adorable." Antonio mooned, burying his face in the kitten's fur.
"Would you two get in the car so we can get going?" Arthur called from the driver's seat. "We have a long drive ahead of us!"
"Yes, yes." Francis responded, ushering Antonio into his seat and closing the door. "Just be honest and say you want to get home so you can play with the kitten, too."
"Sh-shut up and get in the car!"
"Goodbye!" Lovino and Alfred waved farewell to their kittens as the various vehicles departed. "We love you!"
Once the last car was out of sight, Lovino's arm dropped limply to his side. Alfred lowered his more slowly, wrapping it around his husband's shoulders.
"C'mon," he said eventually, voice rough. "We should...go inside. Let the cats out."
Lovino nodded, turning wordlessly, and they shut the door behind them. They hadn't gone three steps before a choking sob escaped him, and Alfred pulled him into his arms, burying his face in his hair as he broke down, too. They clung to each other until long after their sobs ceased, taking comfort from each other's closeness and shared pain. Finally Alfred pulled back a little, sniffling, and cupped Lovino's face when he looked up, leaning down to kiss his flushed cheeks, his forehead, and press a lingering kiss to his lips.
"I love you." He murmured. "More than anything."
Lovino flushed, leaning up to press a kiss of his own to Alfred's mouth. "Love you too, bastard." He confessed, and buried his face in Alfred's neck, wrapping his arms tightly around it. "Let's never do that again."
Alfred huffed a little laugh, rubbing Lovino's back. "Raise kittens, you mean?"
"No," Lovino said, his voice muffled by Alfred's shirt. "Raising them was fine. It's the giving them away that sucks."
Alfred chuckled, kissing his hair. "Yeah. You're right." He squeezed his husband comfortingly. "So, what'll we do if we ever find anymore kittens? Move to the country and become crazy cat people?"
"That sounds about right." Lovino agreed, smiling a little. He pulled back, kissing Alfred's cheek. "Works for me."
"Sounds like a plan." Alfred smiled back, and jerked his head towards the stair. "C'mon, we've got a couple of babies upstairs who need some attention. They've been locked in the bedroom for the last few hours."
"Yeah." Lovino agreed, pulling back and wiping his eyes with one hand, taking Alfred's with the other. "They're gonna be pissed when they find out what we've done."
"Well, they're cats," Alfred said reasonably. "I think kittens growing up and leaving comes a little more naturally to them."
"They'll still be upset." Lovino pointed out, and Alfred nodded, knowing he was right.
"Extra cuddles for everyone tonight, then." He smiled, kissing Lovino's knuckles. "And maybe for a while. The next few days, at least."
"Crazy cat people is sounding better all the time." Lovino muttered, following him up the stairs.
"I like the way you think." Alfred grinned, leaning in to kiss his cheek, as well. "I'll start scoping out farms tomorrow."
"We both will." Lovino corrected, lips twitching up a little. "And we'll find someplace where we can grow tomatoes, and keep loads of animals. Maybe even llamas."
"God I love you." Alfred said fervently, and grinned, scooping him up in his arms and carrying him up the stairs. "How 'bout this: we'll go upstairs and let the cats out, cuddle all night, look for a farm tomorrow, move to the country and grow tomatoes and llamas and raise all the kittens or any other animals we find and love each other for the rest of eternity, whattya think?"
"Sounds like a good plan to me, bastard." Lovino smiled, cupping Alfred's face and leaning in for a kiss. "Sounds like a damn good plan."
AN: It ended so cheesy, so cheesy, but I can totally see them moving to a farm and gardening and raising all the foundlings their hearts desire and Armstrong and Alfred bring home, eventually expanding to fostering and adopting children and just generally reveling in the life.
I've always wanted to do an established relationship fic, and I suppose this was my first shot at it. And I bypassed dating and went straight into marriage, because yes.
The only cat named in Himaruya's canon is Gino, North Italy's cat/North Italy Cat. I took the liberty of devising names for the other cats, based on research of common cat names in each country, historical figures, and consideration of the nations' personalities. These are purely my choices, I won't complain if you don't like them.
This story actually came out a lot shorter than I'd originally planned, but I'm not complaining about that! It's nice to write a fic that doesn't expand from a oneshot into an ever-expanding epic, from time to time.
I hope you enjoyed it, and this finds you well, and in good health and spirits!