"I loved my parents," I said. It even had the benefit of being true. The fact that the people on the ground hadn't actually been my parents wasn't something that he needed to know. "I know what it looks like, but I was in shock."
Dumbledore was watching me with a look I couldn't interpret.
How much had he already guessed, and how much had he gotten wrong? He didn't have all the pieces of the puzzle, but people had made intuitive leaps before, and he'd had a long time to learn how to judge people, especially if he was basically able to read minds.
"You seemed rather...focused," Dumbledore said mildly.
"It's how I deal with problems," I said. "Focus on solutions, and worry about crying later. What should I have done? Sit there and cried?"
"It's what many would have done," he said.
"They said they had people in the police department," I said. "That meant that the moment the police reached me, they'd realize I wasn't dead. I'd be dead shortly afterwards. I knew I had to get away."
"I don't have a lot of experience with driving," he said. "But I have not seen many children your age behind the wheels of cars."
"It's more common in rural areas of America," I said. "Where a child might have to drive a parent to the Hospital if he was bitten by a rattlesnake or suffering from a meth overdose."
I didn't say that I'd been raised in such an area. If he chose to infer that, who was I to complain?
"And the fact that you didn't recognize the car?"
"It was a rental," I said. "And my memory was still a little scrambled. Whatever happened to me had left me a little confused, and it wasn't until later that my mind cleared up."
The best lies were those that had some truth to them. I was still confused about what had happened. Had some higher power placed me in a new body, or had it been Millie's accidental magic looking for someone to avenge her? The worst possibility was that I was in a coma somewhere, either during Golden Morning, or possibly just after the locker.
Maybe my whole career as a villain and hero had been a lie created by a mind that was desperate to have some kind of power, any kind of power over what happened to her.
Dumbledore was silent for a moment. He watched me intently, but I didn't raise my eyes. I watched him carefully through my bugs, though, looking for any sign in his body language about what he was thinking. I didn't get anything, which wasn't surprising. Not only was I not the best at reading body language, he'd had more than a century of learning to hide his.
"You haven't spoken much about your background, Miss Hebert," he said finally. "You've said that there is no close family in the United States. Not even a grandmother, or a second uncle?"
"I'm the only member of my family that's left in this world," I said. "There's no one else. You think I'd fight this hard if there was someone who would take care of me?"
I probably would, but he didn't need to know that.
"You have chosen not to share your family situation with your classmates," Dumbledore said. "And I and the staff have chosen to respect your wishes. Yet is it perhaps unhealthy to bottle up feelings that to all reports you have not yet expressed?"
"I'll cry when I'm dead," I said. I realized that this sounded a little harsh from the expression on his face, and so I rushed to explain."I learned a long time ago that crying doesn't do anything but make you look weak, and in this world, looking weak is a good way to get dead. It doesn't mean I don't care
He was silent, so I continued.
"I'd have been perfectly happy as a Hufflepuff, but the Hat wouldn't let me," I said. "Isn't it supposed to take student's wishes into account?"
I gave an irritated glare at the Hat, which was sitting on a shelf. It sat there like an inanimate piece of felt. I hadn't forgotten my anger at it; a lot of my problems were a direct result of the Hat's decision. Was it listening to us right now, or was it sleeping?
How much had it already told the Headmaster, and was he playing some kind of game with me? It might serve his interests to pursue the fiction that he didn't know what I was.
"I've never seen anyone who belonged in Slytherin more than you do," Dumbledore said after a long moment. "Which, contrary to what my opponents may think is not a slur to your character. Slytherins are shrewd and cunning. They are ambitious, and they have highly developed senses of self preservation. What they do not have to be is evil."
"I'm not evil," I said. "I care about other people. I'm just not as emotional about it as some."
"You've chosen to protect the innocent," Dumbledore said. "Despite the risk to yourself and to your standing. That's a rare quality these days."
"All that's needed for evil to win is for good men to stand by and do nothing."
He smiled at me sadly. "If only more people felt that way, I doubt we'd be in the situation we're in at the moment. I would like to show this memory to some colleagues of mine... perhaps they might recognize the voices where I do not."
"Don't show it to aurors," I said. "I've heard they have people in the Ministry, and if aurors find out that I'm not dead, they'll redouble the attempts on my life."
"Your existence is public record," Dumbledore said. "And you have already made enough of a splash that every parents of a Hogwarts student undoubtedly knows about you, as well as the friends and family of those parents. I'd say that you are probably the most famous child of your age who is not involved in Quidditch, or of course Harry Potter."
"I haven't put it out that my parents were murdered," I said. "Which means that if the Death Eaters find out, then the person who is revealing the name must be one of the people here who told them."
Dumbledore looked dubious. It seemed obvious to me.
"One would presume that they would know whom they had murdered," he said. "Else they would not be murdering."
"Would they really remember the names of those who they killed? Muggleborns aren't actually people to them." I said. "What's another mudblood to them?"
He winced at the epithet, but nodded his head.
"My face might be a different matter," I said. "Which is why I plan to stay out of the papers, or at least not to have my picture posted."
"Perhaps that would be wise," he murmured.
I was silent for a moment. "If they really have infiltrated the aurors, it would be easy for them to call me in for questioning, and then have an unfortunate "attack" on the way to the Ministry. I get killed, along with whatever Ministry stooge that is guarding me but not working for them, and they kill two birds with one stone."
"You have a rather pessimistic view of the world," Dumbledore said.
"I'd say I'm never disappointed," I said. "Although I am occasionally pleasantly surprised."
Dumbledore shook his head sadly. "I had hoped to be able to provide you with seven years of education that are to be some of the best years of your life. Hogwarts is meant to be a haven from the outside world."
"That's not realistic," I said. "The world outside moves on, and the things that affect students' families affect them as well. From what I understand the country is close to war again... possibly an attempted coup, or possibly a civil war. Hogwarts isn't going to be able to stay neutral from that."
He stared at me for a moment. "You seem well educated in politics."
"My mother was a professor," I said. "It certainly wasn't because of my school."
She was an English professor, but she'd taught me how to read and think for myself. Also, the Wards had been forced to take classes in political science, because understanding the dynamics of how people worked together was helpful when dealing with the interplay between multiple gangs.
"And because you grew up in a place where the rule of law was weak, where children had to protect themselves and where authorities at school failed you, you believe that it is your responsibility to care for yourself."
Apparently he'd been paying more attention to the tidbits I'd let slip to my classmates than I'd expected, or maybe he was extrapolating. Hopefully he wasn't as good at it as Lisa.
"Isn't it?" I asked. "Old people look back at childhood as being this wonderful time, but that's because all they remember is the high points. It's just as terrible as the rest of people's lives, just in different ways."
"I'd say there was wonder in each stage of life," Dumbledore said. "And I've experienced almost all of them."
"I'd like to live to be as old as you," I said. "Maybe even as old as the Flamels, assuming I could keep my health and my vitality. But the only way for that to happen is for the people who are trying to kill me to stop doing that, and that's not going to happen unless they are dead or in Azkaban."
He looked as though he wanted to argue, but he didn't say anything.
"So if you would find out who is doing the murders, and who here is informing them, then maybe I could enjoy my childhood."
Dumbledore sighed, and then said, "I will escort you back to your rooms, and then I will begin the additional security preparations to protect the school. I expect that I will have a long night tonight."
"I stink," I said. "So I'll probably need a bath first, but I'll be going to bed as soon as I can afterwards. I actually like thestrals. They're a little strange looking, but they seem gentle."
Our trip through the hallways was quiet and he escorted me down to the dungeons.
"Back from detention, Miss Hebert?" Snape asked, stepping out of his office as we approached.
"Miss Hebert's detention was rather more exciting than any of us expected, through no fault of her own," Dumbledore said. "Perhaps once Miss Hebert is safe in her rooms, we can discuss some things."
"I got to see horses eat a dead cow," I said brightly, smiling widely.
"Enjoying life's little pleasures, Miss Hebert?" Snape drawled. He waited until I turned around to Dumbledore to shudder.
They escorted me to my rooms, and I waited for them to leave and then I gathered my toiletries and prepared for my bath. The Headmaster's office was within my range from the bathroom, if only barely, and I wanted to hear what the both of them had to say.
As I ran my bath, I listened in to Snape and Dumbledore as they walked through the hallways heading for the office.
"Miss Hebert was attacked on her way back from her detention, by a disillusioned attacker on the grounds."
"I presume the attacker is not dead?" Snape asked. "Given her usual methods I would have expected to see more blood."
"For once, Miss Hebert decided to do the prudent thing, and she used Peruvian Darkness powder to escape."
"Being ambushed by someone who is disillusioned isn't something most Witches would survive."
Dumbledore said, "She says she sometimes just knows things, and that this sense gave her enough warning to act."
"She does seem to have a preternatural ability to know things she shouldn't know," Snape said. "Although it does not fit with the usual pattern of Seer's ability."
"Perhaps given her unusual drive to survive, it is a form of accidental magic that she has chosen to develop into an unusual kind of skill."
Snape just looked thoughtful.
"The intruder's tracks headed off the grounds, but its possible that they circled back. I've taken the liberty of wakening all the portraits, and I've got them watching for any disturbances that might indicate a disillusioned intruder, especially at the entrances to the House Dormitories. I've got the House Elves doing a head count now."
When had he had a chance to do all that? He hadn't been outside of my range for very long. Maybe he'd done it while I was watching him.
I'd heard it was possible to do silent, wandless magic, but if it was true, then this was actually impressive. He'd sent messages without my being aware of it, which was concerning on a lot of levels.
"Miss Hebert also consented to give me pensieve memories of the night she woke after the attack on her and her parents. I have viewed that memory, and I'm inclined to think that I may have misjudged your opinion of her."
"Oh?" Snape asked neutrally.
"Take a look at it, and tell me if you recognize the voices of the perpetrators," Dumbledore said.
I luxuriated in my bath as I listened to them going through the motions of their investigations. Apparently all of the students were where they were supposed to be, except me. That was a relief; if meant that the perpetrator was someone outside the castle.
Snape and Dumbledore spent the better part of an hour casting spells on the walls and gates, and by that time I was in my bed and struggling not to fall asleep. I still struggled sometimes with my body's needs.
Figuring out a way to do endurance running was going to be a challenge. It would be years before I was able to transfigure a treadmill, and I doubted that the castle staff would let me put one in my room.
I needed a solution.
The stairs in Hogwarts might have kept my waistline relatively thin, but it hadn't done anything for my long distance running ability. Yet it sounded like the spells they were casting weren't able to cover the grounds, only the walls and the gates of the castle.
My other option would be to run up and down the stairs in the girl's quarters. It would be monotonous, but it might do the trick, at least until the girl's started complaining.
Finally I heard Snape and Dumbledore returning to the Headmaster's office.
I watched as they both placed their faces in the bowl, and I wondered what kind of defenses they had to protect themselves. If I'd wanted to assassinate them both, I could have done it easily, assuming I'd been a little closer. I actually wasn't sure how long it took to view a pensieve memory. Was it in real time. Or was it at the speed of thought?
It seemed to be in real time, which was dangerous as far as I was concerned. Maybe Dumbledore had some kind of protections set about for when he was vulnerable like this; I certainly would have, even in the sanctum of my own office.
After what seemed like a long time, but could have only been a couple of minutes, they both stood up, gasping.
"Avery and Selwyn," Snape said grimly. "They wouldn't have done this on their own, but as far as I know, the Dark Lord hasn't put out a general call to arms."
"Perhaps they have decided to show some initiative to win his favor," Dumbledore said. "And climb in the ranks."
"Maybe," Snape said. "Or perhaps the Dark Lord is being careful in how he is issuing orders. If he keeps most of the organization from knowing what the rest is doing, then he can more easily ascertain who any moles are."
"A troubling thought," Dumbledore said. "One that we must consider at length. On the other hand, what do you think of Miss Hebert's behavior."
"My opinion of her hasn't changed," Snape said. "Despite the appearance of being an innocent eleven year old child, she is a dangerous person. Given sufficient time and training in magic, I suspect that she could rival Bellatrix, or perhaps even the Dark Lord in how dangerous she is."
"Do you think she is lost?" Dumbledore asked, and for once there was no trace of grandfatherly kindness or anything in his voice. There was just cold calculation.
I had an uneasy feeling that Snape's response was very important. If the most powerful Wizard in Britain thought that I was going to be the next Voldemort, what would he do? It was like encountering Hitler as a toddler.
I'd read a story once about a man who'd let a German soldier go during World War One, a soldier who had been a young Hitler. The man had regretted it for his entire life.
Was that what Dumbledore was thinking about?
Snape was silent for a moment.
"I think her fears would not be what they are if she were," he said. "I suspect that she wishes to be a good and kind child, but it is not in her nature. That doesn't mean that she plans to become a Dark Lord... I rather suspect that she'd rather not bother, and that she'd only attempt it if she felt she had no other choice."
"And what would make her feel that way?"
"If she felt that the Dark Lord was becoming ascendant, or if she felt threatened. Otherwise, she would be content to remain where she is and bother no one as long as she is not attacked."
"Very much your House's namesake, Severus?"
"Ironic, isn't it,' Snape said dryly. "The muggleborn snake ascendant. That would make the old guard have an apologetic fit."