Chapter Four: Live and Learn

"Uwu yummy." said Sonic, as he finished eating his bekfest chili dog, licking his gloved fingies in delight.

"Man, sometimes I just like to have a slow day." The Hog moaned in relaxstation, kicking up his kicks on the food table. His beautiful eyes slowly moved to the yellowo police tape still covering his victims' big doors. His EYE narrows as he remembering the evil he done. He shut his eye, feeling no pain only pleasure as he recalls his once living friends, but no longer. So it seems, they are dead.

The ghosts of his crimes haunt him as he lingers in the room of living, pondering what life might be like if Knuckles hadn't been a dumb gay and slipped and felled on that knife and got Sonic into this problemo. He could've probably fucked Amy multiple times, and copied Tails's homework to help him through class, and met hotter hedgehog girls through KNuckles (even tho he was red and probably had red female friends but whatever. Fuck those reds.)

Arising from his moist chair, SOnnnic heard with his muscular ears a knock on the door and a faint, annoying buzzing and groaning sound. Striding to open the wood, he peered with an evil glare through the pee hole, seeing… Charmy Pee! He was holding his weak little boyfist and rubbing it in pain - he had owied hisself on the masculine door.

He opened the door to see none other than the gay little boy he saw in the peeper hole seconds ago, CHarmy Bee floating with his flying bee wings at his door step after he opened the door.

"Sonic, I came to talk to you about, uh… the recent "happenings" here with your ex-alive friends." Charmy Bee stuttered in his gay child voice as he anxiously looked at Sonic's rugged, hot hedgebod.

"What '"hapenis?'' Hehe, I thought we already talked at the police's house, Charmy." Sonic shrugged off the anxious and loser atmosphere the bee boy was eradiating, "Oh but whatev, what else can I do for ya, lil' buddy?"

"W-well…I really didn't have a chance to talk with you at the station, you left really, uh, fast, heehee..." Charmy bee tried to joke, but he's bad at being funny since he's so small and has a child brain. "Anyway, I have something I need to show you, speedy sir."

"How bout a chili dog first? You look like a starved african child - does your mommy even feed you?" Sonic welcummed Charmy into his apartment, and the bee looked up at daddy Sonic with a look of feeling in his little boy eyes.

"I was breastfed." The Bee replied.

"Lmao nice." Sonic replied, thinking of tiddies.

The penis man buzzed in, looking around with a sick feeling in his gut at the yellow tape - he doesn't like the tape, tape hurts when he pulls it off his skin after the big bullies from his elementary school put it on him after he said he was gonna report them to the PP Principal for stealing the hot gorls lunch money. Boy, was his life shitty.

"Well, you know I'm a veggietarian, right? I don't like to eat dogs since they're cute." Charmy Bee said like a piece of shit, taking a sat down at the table in the eating room, "Do you have anything else to eat?"

"NO - I subsist only off of chili dogs, being fast, and my fame. It's the chili dogs or nothin', kiddo," Sonic did a spin on the floor, and deep-throated another chili dog right in front of Charmy Bee!

"W-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-well okay then, Daddy," The Bee pulled out a CLIFF bar from between his twink ass cheeks and began to munch on the food rod in anxious.

"That's a good boy," Sonic patted Charmy's thicc, jiggling bee butt, and proceeded to stand on the counter. "What did you want to chitty-chat about anyway? You know I live a fast life and don't got no time for not being speedy, hahaHAHA!"

"I wanted to ask you a couple of questions first, if you have the time, Mr. Sonik." Charmy Bee folded his hands together as if he was praying to our lord and savior, Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter.

"Shoot, my child." Sonic beckoned with his hands for Charmy to being asking him the questions he had prepared for Sonic, closing his eyes and imagining all the fun he could be having if Charmy Bee wasn't bothering him right now.

"I know you said tail had committeddd the sudoku before he went falling out of the tall building, but uh, uh, the dead body science man had another idea. He said Tailes the fox actually died before he fell from the big window, which means he couldn't have done a walk and a jump."

Sonic felt a flinch deep within his soul, but pushed it down so he could remain the cool witty hedgehog he always is. He took a deep breathe out his shiny wet (that means he's healthy) hedgehog nose before proceeding.

"That's not all… You said you use Bing, but, like, who the fuck uses Bing nowadays? Also I found your gmail account, ifuckhothedgehogs69420lolgottagofastfuckshadow "

"Shut up, I like Bing cuz it's not popular, also I needed a gmail for google docs so I could write my Batman fanfic- I MEAN UH FOR SCHOOL!" Sonic blabbed a little too much to the child cop bee, who used his BIG BRAIN, bigger than his body, to think the truth.

"See, even if you did have a gmail, it looks like you turned off location services, so we couldn't use the data if we tried." CHarmy Bee finished eating his crunch bar and stuffed the wrapper back into his behind. "But how could the foxy fox boy have jumped from his window with such a bad wound? And why? ... It appears he was stabbed in his doorway, so uh, I think that means he would have to walk to his room and THEN jump and uh, not fly high."

"Heh… heh… Y'know, even if what you were insinuating is true, Cummy Pee, you only have circumsized evidence. NO cock hard rock hard proof…" Sweat was now dribbling down Sonic's face like those big black basketball players on the court dribble their balls, but his was sweat.

The little pee pulled a vanilla folder out of his ass, hands shaking with feer but also determinatwion. He looked up at the big Man, as he was exactly at dick sucking height, but said in a voice not filled with Sonic's pp.

"I know the truth, Snacc. I know what you done diddly did. All the evidence points to YOU." Charmy Bee shook and quivered, "As I was analyzing the fully constructed Lego Star Wars Death Star set (which is impressive and bey0nd my comprehension), I found a hidden camera within the laser thingy. The smart man tails must have had it in there for lewd purposes, the little sicko. Anyway, after analyzing the years of probably illegal sexual footage on the little bugger, and using my smart analysising brain, I came to the day of the deaths. SONIC, I KNOW IT WAS YOU WHO COMMITTED THESE CRIMES! PLEASE, COME CLEAN!"

Sonic be silent. And also not going fast. This was all wrong. Wrong.

"S-Sonic, I'm planning on telling the CHaotix about this..oh, and the black man too. But if y-you feel remorse and sad for your crimes, you should come clean yourself- for Amy! For Tails! At least Knuckles death wasn't your fault, but why them?!" Charmy Bee cried out in his desperate child voice, little boy sad tears fell from his eye and landed on the carpet. It stained the carpet.

"...No one can be allowed to view, Charmy. Also, you KNOW tears can stain the carpet. Don't stain the carpet." Sonic muttered.

Sonic's EYE darted around the room, almost as fast hee could diddly dash, but there was no weapon close by. Besides, there would be struggle, he'd have no chance to kill the bee and explain it. His heart began to go doki doki faster and faster, walls were closing in around him, he could see the prison cell in front of him, the electric chair shocking his gooey hogbrians out. No…. NO….

"S-Sonic! Stop right where you are! I have a copy of this file in my office, and with a single call, I can alert my friends!" Charmy Bee stood up as fast as he could, but not as fast as Sonic could, and held his phone to his bee ear and typed numbers, do bees have ears? whatever. "Please, be rational about this, I'm sure we can still-"

Sonic dabbed rally fast, for reasons he couldn't explain. It was instinct, born from fear and not wanting to be caught. He felt something cum up inside him, the world spin and makes him feel like he was on a roller coaster like Space Mountain, something big was cumming and… THEN! -

Sonic had just finished eating his bekfest chili dog, licking his gloved fingies in delight. He stopped, as he remembered what had just happened. What the holy shit fuck just went on. Wasn't Cahrmy Bee gonna rat him out like the little sneaky bee fuck he was?

Sweat began to drip anew from his blue brow, and Sssonc slowly put down his tasty snacc. He was just talking to that gay fuckface charmy bee…. He was going to be torned in… It was over…. But now…?

Sonic heard a familair knock on his door, not unlike the knocks of Charmy Bee he had heard just minutes earlier, and he got frozen as if Elsa from Frozen had shot him with her ice powers (if she could hit him that is), and he was still. Why had he been transported back in time? What fuckery is amongst the hedgehog at this very moment?

Sonic knew Charmy Bee was there, he knew he would use the evidence against him, he knew what he must do to keep his murdery secret…. Sonic thot FAST.

He rose from his sitting position, and looked towards the door. He got the tomato slicer from his kitchen and wedged it snuggly between his gloriously fat ass cheeks, fuck. Putting on his best smile, the Hog opened the door and looked down at the little shit who was gonna ruin his life.

"Heya, Charmy! What can I do for ya, little buddy?" Sonic beemed at the little bee boy like he was his own brother from anotha motha, welcoming the buzzy child into his humble afartment.

"W-well, I had important busy-business to converse with you...about the deaths of your ex-alive friends?" Charmy Bee hesitantly buzzed crossed the thresholds of Sonic's sweet pad.

"Hehe, I figured you'd cum. Miss me at the police's house?" Sonic shutted the door behind the bee boy and locked it quietly but still quickly.

"Y-yes actually, how did you… Amyway, I did have something big I wanted to talk about with you, Mr. Sonic." Charmy Bee floated like a gay freak across the room, the manilla folder obviously showing between his cheeks, just like Sonic had seen before.

"Listen, charmy… I have somethin I've a-wanted to get off my conshence. I've been feeling terrible and… Unsonic-y. I want to confess. I killed my friends Tail the foxs and AMy Roast."

"R-really? You admit to your crimes? H-how'd you know I was going to talk to you about this…Why now after you denied everything?" Charmy Bee slowly turned back to face the blue blur, cautious fear rising like lava in an active volcano in his fuzzy and tiny bee body.

SOnic slowly paced the room, keeping his ass cheeks firmly out of the Bee's beady sight, saying in his voice of acting, "I couldn't keep up the facade any longer…. Plus I knew that eventually amazing, super awesome and cool detectives like you, Cummy, would discover the truth… But you were even faster than I dared to thonk…"

"F-faster than da Sonic? How is that even physically possible…" Charmy came a little, being called fast by the blue blur himself. The flattery… the ideas of maybe FINALLY getting some goddamn respect, finally, was getting to the bee's tiny, weak freak brain.

"Hehe, you know it, kiddo." Sonic grinned big and clenched his cheeks tight in anticipation, feeling the thick shaft of the slicer like a pp (but not his, his was bigger).

"B-but wait...you pride yourself on being the fastest thing alive, so why would you say I'm faster than you?" Charmy Bee's empty stomach sank like the Titanic did in that one movie with the car sex, god I jerked off to that many many times.

"Lol ya got me there, Charmy," Sonic sped up close to the bee, creating bodily tensions, "You know I always gotta go fast. And nobody… nobody… Is faster than Sonic the Edgehog."

Charmy Bee gasped in his little gay bee voice, realisation hitting him like a big car going fast. But it was too late! Sonic grabbed the knife from between his ass cheeks, and plunged it deep within Charmy Bee's chest, pinning him against the wall and covering his tiny bee mouth to keep him shutted up. The little detective boy who knew too much was dying and could do nothing about it because of Sonic's large strength.

Barely getting a chance to squeam, Chummy Pee died in SOnic's big arms, eyes going blank staring at the last thing he'd ever see - Snaic. The folder fell from his grasp like a used cum tissue, and SOnic felt peace once more.

"Phew! That was a close one, huh?" Sonic sighed and put his hands on his hips, letting the bee's lifeless body fall splat on the floor, haha. "I would've been TOAST if I didn't conveniently travel back in time that one time. What's the deal with that shit anyway?"

Sonic turned and suddenly…...there was a ghosty figure in front of him that wanked rally fast. He was big and mean, with blue horns on his head and arms thicker than a lamp post. Also his bulge, damn.

"W-woah!" Sonic backed up fast in the surprise, stepping on the bee body, "Wh-who are you?"

The ghosty looking strong man that looked kind of vaguely like Sonic smiled and nodded his head, his arms crossed over his manly big chest with muscles and his 13 pack abs.

"I-I see…So, you're my "stand" like one of those from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, parts 3 through fucking infinity?" Sonic did a thonk. "Holy Sonic, so it was thanks to YOU that I could cover my ass yet again! Wow, thanks a lot, bro."

Sonic had another chili dog and offered it to his stand, but he silently declined his kind and gentlemanly offer. Sonic ate both of the chili dogs in one throatfull.

"With this new power, maybe I actually can evade the law. Combined with my amazing and unbeatable speed, I could be unstoppable! Fuck the police!" Sonic did another dance move as the stand gave him a thumbs-up and vanished within Sonic's hedgehoggy body.

"Now, what to do with this little fella?" Sonic thot for a second, then smiled with the evil.

(TIME PASSES)

Sonic was preparing the dinner for the Chaotix, as a "thank you" for being super nice to him at the police's house. He had invited them over to "celebrate the lives we had lost" or some bullshit reason he came up with. Also, Sonic knew they couldn't resist since they were his fanboys. The time on the clock was 6:30, and they should be arriving any minute!

DING DONG. That must be them. Squirting and sprinting over to the big door fast as fuck boiiii, he pulled it open and saw Espeeon, Vex, and the bunny bitch Cream.

"THanks for havin' us over master SOnic, we are honored to be in your humble adobe." Vecks said with his crocodile smile, fat gut wobbling with glee at his favorite hedgggggeee.

"I-I'm so excited to eat the food you prepared for us, Sonic-senpai…I am truly honored…" Espio shyly wiggled his lizard hips and blushed super red - what a silly schoolgirl reaction of him!

"Heh, no problem, kohai! Who's this little girl you brought with you?" Sonic leaned over the Cream with a friendly look on his face.

"Sh-she's my girlfriend!" Espio ejaculated, holding Cream's hand. She was obviously too young for him, but Sonic wasn't one to judge.

"Wow, cool!" Sonic pretended to look slightly betrayed when he looked at Espio.

Espio leaned over to Sonic and whispered/moaned in his ear, "But you're the only hedgehog for me, senpai. I only got a girlfriend to make you notice me, uwu."

Sonic smirked and squeezed Espio's booty, making him blush and retreat back to his loli gf.

"Sorry that dummy Charmy Pee couldn't come SOnic, he's been AWOL for about a week now. Probably off trying to get laid in Atlantic city again, loser." Vex apologized to Sonic as he patted his back with his meaty croc claw hand fist.

"Isn't he working on the case? What an idiot, the case is SO cut and dry it's retarded he's even looking at it." Cream finally piped up, with her stupid girl voice, looking towards Espio for approval.

"Lol you're the smartest AND coolest Sonic, forget that gay, you got any beers?" Vex glanced to Cream's ears cuz they were long and Vex was entranced by their floppyness.

Sonic got the boys (not Cream because she was young, she gets a Capri Sun) a couple of Bud Lites, and lit it up as they chatted about life and things. Suddenly...

A cock on the door. Didn't even use the doorbell. Fucker. The blue blur dashed to the door and pulled it open, revealing none other than the thorn in his ass, Shadad the Black Knight.

"Well, well, well, well… Look who showed up fashionably late as always. I'm happy you could bless us with your presents, Detective." Sonic yelled with his big crocodile mouth as he downed another alcoholic beverage.

"Any excuse to gather more evidence against the bigger murder boy in Boston is fine by me cockhog. WHat's on the menuwu? Not that I give a single solitary fuck. Whatever."

Sadow pushed past his blue rival and wheelied into the room of once living, seeing the Chaotix and giving an internal moan of bitchery and angst.

Sonic was anrgy, fuckin Shoadow. He did not like him one bit. No siri. That darkie was bad news, Sonic concluded with his thinking mind. He handed him a Bud Lite with hesitation since he didn't want to share his beer with that bad boy excuse of a hedgehog.

"What the fuck is this? I only drink Jaegermeister, the biggest baddest beer on the market, Faggy gay."

"Deal with it, man. It's the best I've got. Plus, nothing can beat the refreshing taste of Bud Lite beer!" Sonic advertised and money rained on him from the heavens. Espio blushed at Sonic's capabilities. OwO.

"Best you got but not the best I got, I guess." The black man pulled a gallon can of the German nasty beer and slammed it on the table, giving Cream a minor heart attack. Vex recorded a TikTok like a chad. He smirked in satusfaction, having pulled one over the blue dick. Sonic felt rage bubble like when someone shakes a bottle of coke too much then deciedes to open it like an asshole all over someone's geology homework. SOnic swallowed his anger - he would get his rewenge.

The timer dinged on the oven. "DINNER'S READY!" Sonic announced with a sCREAM, and everyone except Shadow (that bitch) cheered and smashed their beers together (except Cream since she didn't have a beer cuz she was underage). She tried to cheers her CapriSun, but she was too short to reach and no one wanted to do it with her cuz she was a little girl.

Everyone sat at the table as Sonic pulled out the big roast from the oven and set it on the table as everyone (except Shamwow) gasped with how delicious it looked. Like that one scene from the end of How the Grinch Stole Christmas where everyone eats the Christmas ham. Sonic brought over the side dishes and other dinner shit.

"Dig in, my friends." Sonic flossed and everyone (except Shadoo) gladly started to pick up the food they wanted on their plates to eat.

"What kinda meat is it, Jesus? I mean Sonic, hahahaHAHA." Vex laughed. Espio laughed. SOnic laughed. Cream cried. Shadow brood.

"No, seriously. What's the dish, asshole." Shadow put his roller skate feet up on the table like a bastard with nO FUCKING MANNERS.

"Heh, I'm glad you asked." Sonic wiggled his finger with a smirk like the classic Sonic does. "It's honey roasted Bear from the Alps! A very rare find and a delicious one at that! I had my G-ma send it to me as a "get-well" gift for my dead friends."

Everyone got quiet cuz it was awkward for Sonic to mention his deads friends so lightheartedly. Cream was crying like a baby so Espio wrapped her in swaddling clothes and rocked her to sleep with a binky in her rabbit mouth.

"I'm so sorry for your loss, Sonic." Espio shed a tear and Cream caught it in her sleep to refrain from staining the carpet. "Please, let us eat this dish in honor of those who have passed."

"Yeah, cool." Sonic said with his trademark shrug, ten dollars fell from the heavens.

Shadman examined the meat with a meaty gaze. "Kind of a small cut for bear, Sonic. Was it a cub?"

"G-ma can only spare so much, y'know. She shares her hunting haul with the homeless, that #blessed woman! Did you guys know she killed the bear herself? What a badass." Sonic said with a smile and made Vex laugh, as always.

Espio took a big boy bite and chewed the meat like a hungry hungry hippo. Except he's a lizard.

"Wow Senpai, you are chef of Gordon Ramsey world-renowned, this tastes as good as god's asshole." Espio creamed his skirt with every bite as his gleaming eyes fixated on Sonic with admiration and desire for sex.

Vex swallowed his portion whole. "Man, Charmy bee would've loved this. Sucks for him he couldn't have a taste."

"Charmy's a veggietarian, you fucking idiot chad." Shadow scoffed as he set his fork down and glared at Vex. "How could you possibly forget something so important about your friend? Fuck you."

Vex lowered his big head in shame and his gargantuan scaly crocodile pp went limp (still smaller than sonic's and shadow's).

"Hehe… I think Charmy will have his share. I made this with him in mind, after all… Too bad he couldn't make it tonight." Sonic lovingly stroked his portion of the meat with his knife, the others (except Shadow) nodding in agreement.

"Fuck this. I want to go home and play Witcher 3 and see Geralt's hot ass. God, I love his ass. Not in a gay way, just in a bro way. I admire his work and his fitness. Also I'm out, bitches." Shadow got up and roller skated away without even saying thank you for the meal he didn't eat.

…

Everyone enjoys the meal and the conversation (except Shacow, who hated everyone and didn't stay for dessert) and before they knew it, it was Cream's bedtime of 6PM and they had to get going so her mommy, Officer Judy Hops, didn't get mad.

"Th-thank you so much for having us over, Sonic-senpai...Please let's meet again," Espio blushed and squirmed in his schoolgirl uniform, leaning closer to Sonic, "Alone, please…"

Cream pretended not to see, turning her gaze away from her gay as fuck bf.

"Lol, good to see you too, Espio! Take care, little Cream, tell your mom I say hi and I loved her movie!" Sonic waved as the two left, Vex following close behind, staring at Cream's bunny booty.

Sonic closed the door behind them, turning around and walking towards the now messy and devoid of people table. Gazing at the thoroughly eaten meat dish in the center before slowly (but still kind of quickly cuz he's Sonic) moving to the closet door, sliding it open and staring down with a look only bad boys have. The severed head of Charmy Bee was in a Walmart plastic bag, his dumb and dead face looking gay in its deadness.

"Nobody can be allowed to view… Ever. Isn't that right, Live and Learn?" Sonic smiled menacingly, his hedgehog man stand posing behind him.

Ora... ora.

End of Capther Quatro...to be continued..,...