Hello, thank you so much for the reviews. I have been very sick and that's why I was unable to update early. I really appreciate the reviews. Thanks for them and please continue to give me your thoughts. If you don't like anything please don't hesitate to tell me.
A haunting melody was being played at the late of night at Su-am Art Center. A certain someone was pouring all his feelings into the violin. As it was night time and no one else was there except him the sound of the melody became louder and louder as if it was shouting its feelings to the world.
After work he was playing his violin for a while to work out his tiredness and frustration. After Jun Pyo's departure they all had returned to Seoul. He hadn't met with her the last few weeks. So he was going crazy to see her, to hear her voice. Jan Di had called him sometimes and they also had exchanged texts but he didn't let her bring the topic up and he knew very well that Jan Di wanted to see him as well. He could feel that in her voice.
'Is she missing me? Worried about me? Or she is just lonely and wants my company.' He didn't know. His brain was not working. Music had always soothed him but today it was not working either as if it was telling him to stop this game of hide-n-seek and just meet her.
The past few weeks were hell for him as he didn't meet her but he survived because though he didn't meet her, he had seen her and that had helped him to survive. He had seen her a few times in these three weeks. As he didn't want her to notice him, he went to see her in her work place by his car and stayed inside. He just watched her from his window and that helped him to bear with it until now.
So many times he thought to run to her, hug her tightly, kiss her senseless but he had stopped himself every time with difficulty. It became painful at night. Almost every night he had the same dream. In his dreams he saw that they were kissing and it brought back the memory of not so long ago. Whenever he touched his lips, he almost could feel her lips over his.
He suddenly stopped playing and kept his violin back in its case as it wasn't helping him. He checked the time and was surprised to see that he was really late. So he quickly came out of the Su-am Art Center and got into his car; drove home.
Grandpa had called him and let him know that he would be going home early today and Secretary Park would be driving him home. So he didn't need to worry. As he was already late he was sure that grandpa might be asleep.
After entering the door he could see the light still on in his living room. 'Grandpa is still awake?!' He strode towards the living room quickly only to stop dead track upon seeing the only person he was dying to see.
She was just looking at him, saying nothing. She stood up and started to walk towards him. The look she gave him made him rooted to the spot. Even he couldn't tear his eyes from her as she held it captive only to herself.
Jan Di was feeling like after staying in a stuffy place for days, she was breathing fresh air now. 'Is this how you feel when you see a very important person of your life after a long time?' Though it's been just three weeks, it felt like she was seeing him after several years.
Her heart was beat like crazy. Each step she took towards him just accelerated her heart beat more. Ji Hoo was holding his breath, waiting for her to come near him.
She came and stood few feet away from him. Their stare was not broken yet.
"How are you, sunbae?" After so long he heard her voice, it sounded like honey to him. It stopped the storm inside his heart which was tormenting him and soothed him. He took note of her feature and said, "I'm fine. How have you been, Jan Di-yah?" He could see that she had lost some weight.
That kind and soothing voice felt like it just bandaged her broken, miserable heart and lessened her pain within seconds. "I was so so."
Ji Hoo just nodded, didn't say anything more, though he wanted to say many things. He walked inside the living room and asked, "When did you come?"
"In the afternoon… My parents went to my uncle's place because of our debt, leaving me here for school; Grandpa heard it and kind of dragged me here. I'll leave as soon as I find a place to stay." She said the last part looking down.
At first Ji Hoo didn't say anything and Jan Di thought that he didn't want to talk to her or want her to stay here. She felt so sad that her sunbae wouldn't talk to her but then she heard him.
"You don't need to leave this place. You can stay as long as you want. Grandpa will be very happy." He turned around and started to walk towards his room. He was hungry but thought to skip the supper.
He stopped when he heard her saying, "What about you, sunbae? You don't want me to stay?" He felt pain when he heard her say it like that but he didn't dare to turn towards her because he knew that if he did his resolve would break.
So he said, "It's not that I don't want you to stay. I'm very happy that you will be staying at my house and I'm glad that as a friend I'm able to help you by giving you shelter."
He started to walk again but stopped when two small arms hugged him tightly from his back. He stood still. Jan Di pressed her face against his back and started to talk.
"I know that you are hurt for my carelessness, sunbae. Without my knowing I've hurt you. I'm so sorry, sunbae." She sniffed.
"Jan Di-yah…"
"Please, let me say it. I know what I've done to you and that night…" She sniffed. "I'm really very sorry. May be you don't want to see me or talk to me but I was… I was dying to see you, to hear your voice. I didn't know about your feelings before but now I know. I'm still unable to respond to your feelings properly because I'm not totally over him just yet."
Ji Hoo put one of his hands over her trembling arms around him and she tightened it in respond. "But for that please don't abandon me, sunbae. I may not be able to love you the way you do right now but I still do love you as my closest friend, as my sunbae. I'm still struggling to forget about him and I need your help here. I know I'm asking for too much and being selfish but can you please help me and give me some time so that…"
Ji Hoo didn't let her finish. He turned towards her and crushed her in his chest, holding her tightly in his arms. He felt peace as he was dying to do so for the last few weeks.
Jan Di was crying silently but when she felt his warmth around her, she let her sorrow pour out and cried in the arms that she had been missing like crazy.
Ji Hoo kissed the crown of her head and said, "You don't know how much those words means to me. I was waiting to hear just that. You can take all the time you need. I'm here to help you. I can wait as I've waited long already and it doesn't bother me at all. I still can wait."
He pulled her to his arms length which Jan Di didn't want just yet as she was missing these warm arms around her so much. Her firefighter wiped her tears with his handkerchief like he had done so many times and cupped her small face.
"I never abandoned you, I can't even think of it. I was just scared about your answer and that's why I avoided you because if the answer is negative, I don't think I can recover ever again. But now I can rest as I know that there might be a time when I can have your love and that's enough for me now."
Jan Di could see the gentle smile on the handsome face of her sunbae. She was missing this smile so much and now this gorgeous smile brought smile to her lips.
She again buried her face in his chest and Ji Hoo closed his arms around her, holding her close to his heart. As her ear was pressed against his chest, she could hear the crazy beating of his heart. Well her heart was beating crazily as well.
She felt Ji Hoo's lips on the crown of her head. She closed her eyes and sighed in contentment. Ji Hoo felt like staying like this forever.
After a while they broke apart and stared at each other. Jan Di went up on her tip toe and pressed as light as a feather kiss on Ji Hoo's lips. She quickly turned around and sprinted to her room.
Ji Hoo stood there stunned. He never imagined that Jan Di would kiss him consciously. Though the kiss was barely a touch of their lips but still it made him excited and it assured him that he still had a chance to be with her.
Inside her room Jan Di stood against the closed door. Her chest was rising and falling and she felt breathless. Her face was as red as a ripe tomato. She cupped her face with her hands and thought 'Why did I do that?'
She was surprised that without her realization she had kissed him and she had done it consciously this time. She touched her lips and her face got even warmer. She recalled the night when they kissed again after so long.
Her first kiss with him was really special. Though she had kissed Jun Pyo but she never forgot her first kiss. It was so gentle and it left a sweet feeling in her heart. Her first kiss was with her first love after all and she never regretted it.
Then that night the way they had kissed. Well it wasn't just normal kiss. They had kissed each other as if it wasn't enough. She could see it vividly in her head how she had explored his mouth and he in return hers. They didn't just kiss but also did something else. Well she was the one who had started everything and she was thankful that Ji Hoo had stopped her. Otherwise she wouldn't be able to forgive herself if something serious happened that night.
Ji Hoo went to his room and took his clothes and towel to take a shower. He was feeling very happy and he was grinning like a stupid. After his shower he came out and found Jan Di waiting for him with food.
Ji Hoo came to the table and sat opposite to her. She placed his plate in front of him and said, "Dig in."
Ji Hoo smiled and said, "What about you?"
"I'm also eating." She pointed her plate and Ji Hoo smiled and started to eat. Jan Di watched him eating and went back to eating herself. After the meal Jan Di took both of their plates and went to kitchen.
Ji Hoo found her washing their plates. He offered to wipe the plates and kept them inside the cabinet. After wiping their hands they came out and Ji Hoo saw Jan Di yawning. He smiled.
He stroked her hair and Jan Di looked up upon feeling his hand on her head suddenly. Ji Hoo had a gentle smile on his face. "You must be tired. Go take some rest."
Jan Di nodded. Though she wanted to talk to him some more but she was too tired. So she thought to go to sleep. She said, "What about you, sunbae? Won't you sleep now?"
"Hmm."
"OK, good night."
"Good night."
Though Ji Hoo had a strong urge to kiss her good night but he held himself in check. He didn't want to scare her by rushing. So they parted and went to their respective rooms.
Next morning
Jan Di woke up when the morning sun caressed her face. Her brows ceased and she opened her eyes slowly. She looked around and found herself in a room which was not her. Then she recalled what happened yesterday.
Grandpa had heard about her family's situation and brought her here and she was currently sleeping in one of Ji Hoo's guestrooms. She smiled when she recalled how they made up last night. She sighed with relief. She looked around and her eyes went as big as a saucer when she saw the time. It was 9:30 am.
She jumped out of the bed and ran out. When she reached the living room she found Ji Hoo sitting on the sofa reading a book. That was a beautiful sight. He looked so handsome and refreshing in the morning. He was wearing his reading glasses. His bangs fell on his forehead.
'Has sunbae always looked good in the morning? Why haven't I noticed it before?' she mused. Then she realized because she was looking at him in a new way now. She hadn't seen it before because she had never tried to notice him before.
Her thoughts were torn when she heard his voice. "Jan Di-yah, you are awake?"
She looked at him and tried to smile. "Did you have a good sleep?"
"Hmm…"
"I bet you did." Ji Hoo smiled. Jan Di looked at his smiling face and thought 'Is he teasing me?' His smile broadened and he grinned when he heard the growl of the monster that resided inside Jan Di's stomach. Jan Di blushed with embarrassment.
Ji Hoo closed the book and kept it beside him. He stood up and said, "Jan Di-yah, go, fresh up and come out. I'm preparing your food."
Jan Di sprinted to her room and Ji Hoo smiled at her back.
Jan Di entered the dining room and found Ji Hoo waiting there with foods. The table was full of dishes. Water came to her mouth.
Ji Hoo pulled her chair for her and beckoned her to have the seat. She sat and he placed a plate full of food in front of her. She was surprised. She looked up, "Sunbae, it's too much."
Ji Hoo just smiled and said, "Just eat." He took a seat opposite to her and encouraged her to eat.
She looked at the foods around her and on her plate. As her stomach was empty she didn't argue much and started eating.
Ji Hoo smiled with satisfaction. He had always enjoyed watching her eating. He looked on at her as she ate. While eating she asked, "Have you eaten, sunbae?"
"Hmm."
"Grandpa will be home early today, huh?"
"Nope, he will be going fishing with one of his friends."
Jan Di stopped eating. So that means they would be all alone in this home. She had never thought of it before but now this thought came to her mind. It's not the first time they would be alone but now the situation was totally different. She was confident that Ji Hoo wouldn't do anything to make her scared and uncomfortable.
But still the image of them both kissing that night came rushing to her mind. Her ears became red and she quickly started to eat again. She berated herself for having these thoughts mentally. As she was eating very fast and shoving everything in her mouth, she choked and started to cough.
Ji Hoo looked at her with confusion when she stopped eating at first and then started to eat with high speed as if the foods would disappear if she didn't hurry up. When she choked and started to cough he got worried and quickly offered the glass of water which was beside him. "Jan Di-yah, slow down!"
She accepted it with a nod of thanks and drank the water. She felt embarrassed at her own immaturity. Surely sunbae was not thinking of it. 'What am I getting so worked up about?' After finishing the water she looked at Ji Hoo and smiled awkwardly. She tried to start a conversation to shove away the thoughts that were disturbing her.
"The foods were delicious. Did you cook them all, sunbae?"
"Yeah, I cooked today and thanks." Ji Hoo replied and a little surprised at her sudden question about food.
She stood up and took her now empty plate to the kitchen to clean it. Ji Hoo was not that stupid. From her behavior he realized that she was conscious of him and she might be thinking of them being alone in this huge house. That thrilled him but being a gentle man that he was, he didn't want to rush anything and scare her. He was well aware that she was still not over Jun Pyo. So he wanted to be patient and he also wanted her to be comfortable around him. The last thing he wanted for her to be scared of him. He could tolerate anything but Jan Di being scared of him… he couldn't tolerate even the idea of it.
"Are you going to the porridge shop today?" Ji Hoo asked from the dining space to make her at ease by conversing with her.
"Yeah," She said loudly from kitchen. She came out and asked, "What about you, sunbae? What is your plan for today?" She cleared the table and Ji Hoo helped her by wiping the table with a cloth.
"Nothing, I just need to go to Su-am Art Center today in the afternoon. Other than that I'm totally free today. By the way, do you need a lift?" he asked hopefully after cleaning the table.
Jan Di considered his offer and she could see his hopeful face. As she didn't have the heart to refuse him she agreed. And it's not that she didn't enjoy his company. She had always liked his company, more than anyone else's even sometimes more than Jun Pyo's she had always felt at ease with him.
Though they didn't have any class today but Woo Bin came to the F4 lounge as he had left his phone there the day before. When he entered he was shocked to see someone who wasn't supposed to be there.
The F4 leader was playing his video game there. He was pressing his controller with so much force that it stopped working at that point and as it wasn't working anymore. So the impatient Gu Jun Pyo got annoyed and threw it away. "Aish!" When Jun Pyo looked back and found his friend standing behind him a smile automatically came to his face.
"Woo Bin-ah!" Jun Pyo quickly stood up and hugged his friend. Woo Bin smiled and hugged him and slapped his back.
After the hug Woo Bin said, "What a pleasant surprise, Jun Pyo! What are you doing here? When did you come?" He was glad to see his friend as he thought that they wouldn't be seeing Jun Pyo for quite sometimes after their encounter with Kang Hee Soo that night.
"I came yesterday night. Where are others?" he looked around for any sign of the other members if F4.
"We don't have any class today, have you forgot that?" Woo Bin reminded him.
"Ah, yeah, I forgot." Jun Pyo scratched the back of his head. "Then what are you doing here?" he asked him.
"I left my phone here yesterday. So I just came to take it." He showed his phone and asked, "So are you staying?"
"Yeah, I'll be staying for a while but not long." Jun Pyo replied with a stoic face.
"So you are returning to USA?" Woo Bin asked trying to gauge his reaction.
"Hmm, the witch let me off the hook for a while now." Jun Pyo said though he wasn't very happy for that because she had already destroyed everything that needed to be destroyed. But her dogs would not try to drag him from here and there now and he was glad at least for that. "I'll be here till the graduation and then I'll have to leave."
Woo Bin nodded as he knew that it was inevitable. But before Woo Bin could say anything they heard Jae Kyung's voice.
"Jun, You are here?! I've been looking for you the whole school." Jae Kyung said while entering the F4 lounge. She nodded her head at Woo Bin and he gave a subtle nod in return.
"Why are you looking for me?" Jun Pyo asked with irritation.
"Isn't it obvious that I want to be with my husband? And is this the way you talk to your wife?" Jae Kyung asked him getting a hold of his collar.
"Whatever! Just don't follow me everywhere." Jun Pyo wretched her hands from around his shirt collar and stormed out of the lounge.
Jae Kyung looked at his retreating back. She was a little hurt that he was still treating her the same way as before their marriage but she tried to cheer up. 'No! I'll definitely make you fall for me. It's not the time to give up.'
Woo Bin saw their interaction and he couldn't help but felt a little pity for that girl for Jun Pyo's behavior. But he had to say, he was impressed at her determination.
Jae Kyung turned towards Woo Bin and smiled, "How have you been, Woo Bin-ssi?"
"I've been great." He replied coolly and slipped his phone in his pocket.
"Where are the other two?" Jae Kyung looked around like Jun Pyo did.
For a moment Woo Bin thought that Jun Pyo and Jae Kyung were kind of similar. "We don't have any class today. I just came here to take my phone because I left it yesterday." He told her before her asking as he knew that she would ask him the same thing as Jun Pyo did.
Jae Kyung nodded. "I haven't seen Jan Di at school. I've searched all the places at school but she is nowhere. Have you seen her today?"
"She doesn't have any class today as I remember. May be you can find her in porridge shop." Woo Bin informed her and walked towards the door.
She thanked him and left the lounge. Woo Bin walked out as well and texted Yi Jeong and Ji Hoo to inform them about Jun Pyo's arrival.
After Ji Hoo dropped her to the porridge shop, she entered and found Ga Eul and master arguing over a TV show. She ignored them as it was normal to see them always arguing over something and put on her apron. Ga Eul came to her when she saw her best friend.
"Jan Di-yah, did you talk to Ji Hoo sunbae yesterday?"
Jan Di could see her best friend eagerly waiting for her answer. So she said, "Yeah." She was tying her apron.
"Did you guys make up?" Ga Eul asked curiously as Jan Di had told her about Ji Hoo's confession and implicitly about the incident and their situation.
"Hmm."
"Really? How did it go? You are back to being friends again?" Ga Eul was throwing question after question to her.
When Jan Di was about to say something they heard the bell ringing and both of the girls bowed without even noticing who had entered. Jan Di was thankful to the customer who entered as it stopped Ga Eul from asking her too much questions. But they were shocked to hear a familiar voice.
"Jan Di!"
Both of the girls looked up and found Jae Kyung standing at their shop door with a huge smile on her face.
"Unni!" Jan Di exclaimed.
Jae Kyung came and hugged Jan Di tightly. Jan Di hugged her back and looked around her for any sign of Gu Jun Pyo. Ga Eul was also doing the same. She was a little worried for her best friend. 'Why now? When Jan Di was getting a little better…' After hugging Jan Di Jae Kyung hugged her as well.
When she released them they escorted her to a table and Jae Kyung pulled Jan Di to sit beside her. "I missed you guys so much!" Jae Kyung exclaimed.
"I missed you too, unni." Jan Di felt a little uneasy upon seeing Jae Kyung, not because she didn't want to see her but because she was the wife of her ex. She felt a little stab at her heart when she saw the wedding ring in her ring finger but she tried to ignore it.
Ga Eul took a seat opposite to them and she kept watching her best friend. Ga Eul was giving her the look but Jan Di tried to ignore her looks and tried to give her full attention to Jae Kyung as she was quite fond of the JK heir.
"Unni, weren't you in USA?" Jan Di asked to shift Ga Eul's concentration from her.
"Yeah, I came with Jun last night. We will be staying here till the graduation and then we will have to return though I want to stay with you guys more." Jae Kyung informed her and sighed.
Jan Di's heart throbbed painfully at the name of Jun Pyo. Jae Kyung saw how Jan Di tried to hide her pain upon hearing his name. Jae Kyung felt a little sad for Jan Di as she loved this girl as her friend and little sister. So she quickly changed the topic and talked about something else though it pained her that someone still loved her 'husband' and was in pain. Then she thought that they were together before she came in Jun's life. So she should be able to tolerate at least this and also she was thankful that Jan Di never tried to get Jun Pyo back.
Ga Eul also participated in their conversation and at the end Jae Kyung dragged the two girls with her and took them shopping.
"You are still here?" Woo Bin asked Jun Pyo when he saw him still in the campus.
"Why? This school is my. Can't I be here?" he asked a little annoyed and looked around as if searching for someone.
"Of course you can. Are you waiting for your wife?" He teased him a little. The F4 fan girls were crowding around them and squealing. And the first time in his life Woo Bin felt a little irritated at their fan girls.
At the reminder of Jae Kyung Jun Pyo looked around him to see if Jae Kyung was anywhere and said, "Why are you talking about the monkey now?" with annoyance.
'Well he is not whining about her not being his wife. A little improvement I guess.' Woo bin thought. "Then why are you still in here if you are not waiting for your wife?" Woo Bin emphasized on the word wife as he was enjoying it too much tormenting Jun Pyo.
Jun Pyo's face became stiff as he clinched his jaw and the amused grin of Woo Bin face vanished when he heard his reply.
"I'm here to see Jan Di." Jun Pyo replied calmly.
Woo Bin was known to be the coolest member of F4 as he always kept his cool in every situation but he snapped at that this time. "What did you just say?"
"I'm here to see Jan Di." Jun Pyo repeated and looked at Woo Bin. He was a little surprised to see Woo Bin pissed as he thought that he might help him.
Woo Bin grabbed the crook of Jun Pyo's arm and dragged him to the F4 lounge. Jun Pyo was puzzled at his sudden change of behavior but he let him drag him there.
Inside the lounge Woo Bin forsook Jun Pyo's arm and turned towards him. He crossed his arms across his chest. "You will not see Jan Di."
The tone Woo Bin used annoyed Jun Pyo as if he was the leader. Well, in some ways he was the leader though Jun Pyo didn't want to admit it as he behaved like a stupid sometimes when Woo Bin had to give them lead.
"Why won't I?" Jun Pyo tried to sound annoyed though he was a little surprised at Woo Bin's tone.
"Your darling mother put her through hell. Wasn't it enough already? Or you need to break her some more so that she would never recover?" Woo Bin's tone became louder.
"You are sounding like Ji Hoo now." Jun Pyo shouted.
"Well yeah! At least he always protected her, never hurt her. Now I'm thinking that he is a much better choice for Jan Di than you."
At that Jun Pyo snapped and got a hold of Woo Bin's collar. "What did you just say?" He shouted at his face.
Woo Bin pulled Jun Pyo's hands from his shirt collar and smoothed it. "You have no right to shout or be angry now." Woo Bin said calmly. "If you loved her so much, then why did you go along with the marriage? Why didn't you even try to stop it once?"
For that Jun Pyo had no answer because what Woo Bin said was true. He just balled his fist and looked away. Then he said lamely, "Are you my friend or her?"
"This has nothing to be with whose friend I am but if you must know, I'm your friend. But Jan Di is my friend too and that girl has went through so much for being involve with F4. I don't want her to be in any kind of situation where she will be reminded of her pain."
"You are sounding as if you are her father or a protective brother." Jun Pyo was still very angry as his friends were still accusing him and making it sound like he always caused her just pain. But it was all he could do to protect the girl he loved from his witch mother. Still he was glad that F4 was with her and he could rest assured that F4 would always protect her from every danger even if he wasn't here.
"Do I? Well I don't want to be a father in my age but I'll be glad if she is my sister." Woo Bin informed and left the room leaving a stunned Jun Pyo.
After a while a wry smile came to Jun Pyo's face. 'Guem Jan Di, you have changed every member of F4 and I love you for that. Is it selfish of me for still wanting you though I have already lost you forever? Is it too much to ask if I just want to see you?' Jun Pyo thought painfully. A tear slipped down his cheek but he wiped it quickly.
Jan Di was exhausted as Jae Kyung was dragging her all around the places and bought her and Ga Eul expensive dresses though they tried to protest. But the JK heir just didn't know when to stop. So they just gave up and let her do whatever she wanted as they knew that she never had any friends. May be she was sympathizing with her.
When Jae Kyung left them she talked with Ga Eul a little and then they parted to go home. May be Ga Eul was also exhausted and that's why she hadn't asked her about Jun Pyo or Ji Hoo. Jan Di was glad for that.
Jan Di came in front of Ji Hoo's front door, not even noticing the familiar black car outside Ji Hoo's house. She put the bags down and pulled out the key from her pocket which Ji Hoo had given her this morning. She put it inside the keyhole and opened the door.
She took her bags and walked inside but froze at the entrance of living room when she found Jun Pyo sitting on the sofa. Her bags slipped out of her hands and fell on the floor. As she was with Jae Kyung and heard that they would be staying till the graduation so she knew that at some point she would see him but she didn't expect to see him at Ji Hoo's place.
"Gu Jun Pyo…"
Jun Pyo was shocked as well to see her there at Ji Hoo's place at that time. He came to visit Ji Hoo and wanted to talk to his best friend. Though he was dying to see her, he never thought that he would see her there today.
He stood up and murmured, "Guem Jan Di…"
Ji Hoo got the text from Woo Bin after he dropped her at porridge shop. He felt uneasy at the news. He knew as Jun Pyo would be staying till graduation Jan Di and Jun Pyo would meet and that was inevitable. What he was most afraid of was that Jan Di's wounds would open again and he hated to see it.
As if that wasn't enough. He got a text from Gu Jun Pyo a while ago saying, "I want to meet you. I'll be at your home in the evening."
Ji Hoo was distracted and was in his own world when he felt his phone vibrate. 'Jan Di!' She left a message asking what he wanted to eat as she wanted to cook tonight.
"Shit!" Ji Hoo took his coat and quickly strode towards the exit of Su-am Art Center to go home as quickly as possible. 'I need to stop them from meeting today.'
He got on his car and drove home as fast as he could. After getting down from car he ran towards his home. He thrust opened the door and entered. He quickly walked towards the living room. 'Please let me protect her from any heartache.'
When he came across the living room and saw Jan Di and Jun Pyo there his heart dropped. 'Sorry otter, I couldn't protect you from heartache today.' He murmured in his heart.