"For what it's worth. I'm happy for you. You bring out the best in each other."
Aside from when Ginny was intentionally focusing on something specific, Neville's words had been on repeat in her head. When Harry had left - his behavior having made it apparent that he was still feeling resentful toward Neville - Ginny had turned to apologize to their friend.
"It's complicated," she had said with a shrug, as if that explanation wasn't completely lacking.
Neville laughed and waved a dismissive hand as he continued to lead her to his Gran's study. "It's alright, Ginny. I just never thought I'd see Harry look at me like that."
She hurried to explain, not wanting Neville to think badly of him. "He doesn't mean anything by it, Neville. He likes you. It's just… he's..." she trailed off, uncertain how to explain the jealousy without explaining the prophecy.
Neville brushed it off, "Jealous," he answered simply. She looked at him in surprise. "Really, it's fine. After Michael, I'm used to it."
Ginny nodded absently, thankful she wouldn't have to explain and that he underst-. "Wait!" She stopped him, staring with wide eyes. "What do you mean 'after Michael?' What does Michael have to do with this?"
He gave her a shrewd look. "Well, Michael was always a little jealous of our friendship. He never really trusted me, since we had gone to the ball together- always gave me this suspicious look. You really never noticed?"
"No," she replied faintly, the shock momentarily stealing her voice. "Are you telling me Harry is looking at you like that? Like, like…"
"Like he likes you and feels threatened by me?" He supplied. He shook his head incredulously. "Are you really asking me that? How could you not know?"
Since returning from Longbottom Manor, she had spent the entire evening carefully watching Harry. She had been certain that Neville was wrong, but the clues were all there, now that she opened her eyes and looked. It was surprising how much her state of willful ignorance had allowed her to miss.
He was always near her. He touched her often, but shied away from everyone else. She near constantly felt his eyes on her. When she looked at him, every smile he gave her reached his eyes. She's seen him laugh more in the last four days than she had in the entire time she had known him. He willingly talked to her about his fears, insecurities, and doubts - that was perhaps the most telling. There was no denying that he felt something for her that he didn't for anyone else in his life.
She just didn't want to accept it.
Tearing down the wall - allowing herself to open up to him and trust him - had made it quite obvious that her feelings for him had never actually gone away. They had been carefully sectioned off and hidden, even from herself, but they had never dissipated or diminished in any way.
It was frightening how quickly they had flared now. It was as if they had been smoldering coals when they were locked away, but the influx of fresh air as the wall was torn down and the fresh kindle her interactions with Harry were providing had caused them to light into a veritable inferno. If she believed that he returned those feelings and then he didn't, it just may destroy her.
And she was not the type of girl to allow a boy to destroy her. Not anymore.
Still, the thought that Harry may actually be interested in her persisted. As much as she fought it, warmth spread through her every time she thought of another positive sign. She was having trouble thinking of any signs that indicated he didn't like her at this point. Little observations swam through her mind one by one without permission, forcing themselves into her consciousness.
The memory of last night was particularly vivid, as evidenced by the flutter in her chest as it replayed in her mind. She had never seen Harry look or act like that ever. Like he was a real live teenage boy enjoying the silly aspects of life. They had been talking about Sirius even, but there had been no shadows in his eyes when he looked at her.
Sirius… what would he say? He had told her not to give up on Harry. She thought he meant their friendship, though now she wondered if he could have meant more. Had he already sealed the betrothal rite at that point?
When her preoccupation with these thoughts caused her to catch her hip on the handrail to the third floor staircase, she decided enough was enough and forced herself to focus.
She banished those thoughts and began compiling her list of tasks as she descended the stairs toward the kitchen in search of breakfast. Gringotts. Olivander's. Reaching out to Moody, Tonks, and Andromeda about training. Bill would handle Fleur. Getting in touch with Remus, since Harry had questions and the werewolf had yet to step foot back in Grimmauld Place since that first day. They also needed to have a discussion with Dumbledore soon, about a great many things. She wasn't very pleased with him right now, but she was slightly worried about what Snape had been doing last night and if the headmaster was alright or not.
The list gave her tangible goals and made her feel centered. She could handle checking tasks off her list. Purpose settled over her in place of her muddled feelings about Harry and her anxiety faded. We have bigger things to worry about, she reminded herself.
She did allow herself to be distracted as she walked down the stairs to the first floor, however. Instead of thinking about Harry, though, her distraction came in the form of the changes that had occurred in decoration of the area. She happily observed that all the prior Black house elves' heads had been removed from the wall and that she no longer had to cringe in expectation of hearing Walburga's screams if a floorboard on the stairs creaked when she misstepped. They weren't gone for good, of course - Kreacher having simply agreed to put them out of sight in the drawing room, since no one ever used it.
Raised voices caught her attention and had her hurrying down the last flight of stairs. In the kitchen she found Bill watching Ron argue with her mother while Hermione stood at his side looking slightly nervous. She quickly picked up that Ron and Hermione wanted to accompany them to Diagon Alley.
"Why do you want to come?" she interjected, preventing a red-faced Ron from undoubtedly saying something that would ruin any chance they had. Her mother fell silent as well. Though Ginny was grateful that she was allowed to speak without interruption, the apprehensive way her mother had been treating her was starting to get worrisome. I'll have to talk to her about that, she thought, adding another item to the list.
Hermione answered her quickly, casting an uncomfortable glance at Mrs. Weasley, "There were a few avenues I thought to explore regarding the magic behind the betrothal, but they're only vague ideas right now. I was hoping to get some new books, but I really need to look for myself."
It seemed like a good idea to Ginny. Whatever bond she and Harry shared was clearly stronger than had originally been anticipated. She looked to Bill, "Is it just you escorting us?"
"No. Tonks is off today and should be here any minute," he replied, shrugging. "I figured it couldn't hurt to be too careful, but the four of you shouldn't be a problem, given that you and Harry can defend yourselves if need be."
She turned to her mother next, "I think they should come with us," she said gently. She didn't want to make demands. It felt wrong for something like this. "You know that Tonks and Bill can handle it, and we'll all be careful." Her mother looked worried still, so she asked, "Would you like to join us? It's probably good for all of us to get out of here from time to time."
Her mother hesitated briefly, but then her face softened. "No. No, I'm fine. I have some things to take care of around here, but you should all go. Get out for a bit." Her mother smiled, but her eyes were sad.
Ginny's heart ached at the expression, so she walked over an embraced her mother tightly. Her mum loved them all so deeply; she had dedicated her entire life to raising her children with all of her heart. "Thank you, Mum. I know it's been hard, but you're doing the best you can. We know that," she whispered.
She felt her mother tremble a bit, but nod before pulling back and kissing her crown. "I love you, Ginny, all of you."
"We love you, Mum," she said smiling slightly. "Even if we don't always act like it."
Her mother laughed lightly, a sheen in her eyes, before releasing her completely and shooing her away. "Enough, now. You all need to get ready while I finish preparing breakfast. It's fine if you want to go, so long as Tonks agrees, but not until you've had a good meal."
Ron left first in a rush, as though afraid their mum would change her mind if he lingered too long. Hermione shook her head, quietly thank Ginny, and followed Ron up the stairs at a more sedate pace. Ginny started to follow but stopped to turn to Bill at the last minute.
"No bad news for me today, right?" she asked in jest, just a hint of actual apprehension in her voice.
Bill smiled gently in understanding, "Not today, Firefly. I'm just your escort for the day." She sighed in relief and smiled back. It fell when he said, "Now go get that boy of yours so we can get out of here."
"Stop it," she hissed, casting a glance at her mother, who was now humming to herself as she prepared breakfast on the other side of the kitchen, to make sure she hadn't heard. It was a fight to prevent her earlier thoughts from rising to the front of her mind again. "He's not my anything," she said more levelly.
"I beg to differ," Bill said lightly. "As would the goblins," he added. On the surface, he only seemed to be teasing her, but there was an undercurrent to his comments that hinted at something else. She didn't like it.
With one more glance at her mother to be sure, she flipped him off and said, "I'll go and get Harry, since I'd really rather get this trip over with."
She spent her walk up the stairs determinedly ignoring thoughts of Harry and mentally preparing the conversation she intended to have with her mother. What had been done had been done, and there was no point in her being angry about it or her mother living in regret. That didn't stop the flutter in her chest or the wide smile that spread across her face when she heard Harry laughing through the door before she even opened it, however.
She found him sitting in his usual spot on his side of the bed, laughing with his back against the headboard and Mischief Managed open in his lap. Traces of laughter were still evident in the creased corners of his eyes and the upturn of his lips, though he had his lips pressed shut. It made her feel happy too, and she cheerfully asked, "May I ask what's so funny this time?"
A chuckle broke loose as he shook his head. "It doesn't even matter. I was just flipping through and some of this is so ridiculous that I can't help but wonder if Sirius was really that wild or if he was just exaggerating the retelling."
She laughed lightly as she took her own spot beside him. With Sirius, there was no telling. "I have no idea," she replied honestly.
"I'll have to ask Remus next time he's around," Harry continued, looking back at the book and flipping through. "He was present for most of the Hogwarts-era stories."
"That's a good idea," she replied encouraging. If he ever shows up again, she added silently. Lupin's absence had been bothering her a great deal, mostly because she knew it bothered Harry. He seemed to be in a good mood this morning, however, so she decided not to worry too much on it. "Well, I'm sorry to ruin the fun, but it's about time to go. Mum wants to feed us all first," she said in fond exasperation.
"All?" he asked.
"Sorry, Sirius's honesty, or lack of, distracted me." She explained, "Ron and Hernione are going to be joining us, though they'll hopefully go to the bookshop while we're busy." She took his hand and began pulling him from bed. "So go get those robes from my brother before he disappears down to kitchen, or else you'll end up with no clothes and no food."
Harry groaned. "I hate dress robes."
"Me too," she agreed. "At least these are my own and actually pretty nice," she admitted with reluctant respect for Fleur's taste. "We really should stop at Madame Malkins and get you your own set. You'd probably be much more comfortable if you didn't have to wear Ron's."
Harry grumbled something noncommittal and slowed his pace. "Please don't make me go shopping. I went with Hermione once when Ron wasn't talking to me during the Tournament. She doesn't even like shopping and it still took me forever to find a cloak that she approved of. 'You're a triwizard champion. You can't give Rita Skeeter anymore ammunition by looking like a ruffian.' Fat load of good that did," he said darkly.
She stopped pulling and turned to face him. Placing both hands on his shoulders, she made sure he was looking her in the eye when she spoke. "Harry," she said seriously. "You are not allowed to sulk today and ruin all the fun. You are getting out of Grimmauld Place and going to Diagon Alley with Tonks, Bill, your two best friends, and the very lovely me," he smiled at that and she winked. "And you will smile and be happy while we find you some clothes that look and feel good," she paused. "Well, and me too, but I'm sure you and Ron can find something to do while Tonks and Hermione help me."
She thought his eyes darkened as they dropped down and appraised her body. There was nothing to see, as she was covered appropriately in her formal dress robes already, but he had seen her in all sorts of worn and tight clothing recently while she'd been practicing. A thrill shot through her and her hands tightened around his shoulders in surprise. She'd never felt that way from a look before.
The action seemed to pull Harry from his daze. He shook his head and stepped back a bit. "Right," he said, his voice low. "Sounds like a plan. Lead the way."
She complied, in a daze herself. Something had her shooting a sideways glance at the mirror though, where she saw Harry's gaze drop to her bum. She almost paused misstep, but it would have given her away.
He doesn't like you, she told herself weakly. Boys look at girls all the time. It doesn't mean anything. The same unconvincing thought continued, and you don't like him. Right?
She shook herself mentally, trying to rid herself of the entire exchange. It wouldn't do her any favors being distracted. She focused her thoughts back to her check-list, trying to ignore anything Harry related with only limited success.
It seemed to be only a short time later that Bill was leading their way through the alley at a brisk pace. Harry was walking with Ron and Hermione slightly behind her eldest brother, the three of them deep in conversation about brooms several paces ahead of her and Tonks. Despite the years she spent longing to be part of their little group, Ginny was now comforted to see the familiar sight of the three of them together once more. Things had been so crazy lately that they hadn't spent much time as a trio. Aside from the fact that it gave her space from Harry to think clearly, it also gave her the opportunity to talk with Tonks alone.
"Not that I'm not happy to see you or my brother," she began, "but where the hell is Lupin? It's been over a week and Harry hasn't seen or heard from him at all."
"I really don't know," Tonks replied quietly. "We haven't spoken."
That wasn't what Ginny had been expecting after witnessing the way they were interacting the day they picked them up from King's Cross and how upset Tonks had been a week ago. Her friend really wasn't the type to let anyone push her away usually. "Not at all?"
"We had a fight," Tonks admitted, the tips of her hair turning black. "I've been giving him space," she said bitterly.
"I'm sorry," she said gently, throwing an arm around the older girl's waist and squeezing quickly. When she pulled back, she continued apologetically, "I know this is bad timing, but I really need you to either get a message to him or tell me how to do it." Given the type of work her old professor did for the Order, Ginny had been afraid to send him an owl that may put him in danger.
Tonks looked away briefly weighing the options, before replying firmly. "I can do it."
"Good," Ginny said, happy to see the resolute expression on her friend's face. Tonks was strong and full of life, she shouldn't be afraid to fight for what she wanted. "Tell him to pull himself together. Harry needs him, and I'm sure he could benefit from talking to Harry as well."
"Harry seems to be doing alright," Tonks said, a sudden streak of mischief lighting her expression. "You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?" she added with a raised brow.
Ginny brushed off her teasing, not wanting to allow herself to be distracted by those thoughts again. Remus was one of the items on her list, and she wanted to get answers for Harry. Her conflicting feelings made her respond more roughly than she intended. "Whether he is or isn't - and why - is irrelevant. No one can replace the kind of connection they both have to Sirius and his father."
Tonks sobered and nodded. "You're right. I'll do it as soon as we're done here." Her hair turned gray at the end as she added, "I am worried about Remus too."
"I know," Ginny said compassionately. "It will be good for both of them."
"Yeah…" Tonks replied distractedly. Ginny almost regretted forcing the issue, now that she saw how sad and worried Tonks really was Sometimes she forgot how alike they were, and that just because Tonks was acting carefree didn't mean it was true. She was about to apologize when Tonks shook her head and changed the subject.
"Bill told me what happened," Tonks said sympathetically. "So Dumbledore knows?"
"I would imagine so," Ginny replied, reflecting on her conversation with Snape the previous night. For a fleeting moment, she had thought she'd seen surprise and respect flash across his face, but it had quickly been replaced with contempt. "He must have used Legillimancy on someone, because he had already figured it out by the time I got down there."
"I'm sorry, Ginny," Hermione said. Ginny hadn't realized she had fallen back from the boys to listen. "I think he picked it up from me," she admitted, biting her lip nervously.
Ginny smiled reassuringly at her friend. "It's fine. It's not like we could keep it a secret forever. We did intend to tell him eventually," she added with a shrug. "Actually, I expected him to find out much sooner than this."
"Dumbledore has been busy, apparently," Tonks interjected, beginning a quiet explanation as she kept a vigilant eye on the people they passed. Ginny did the same as she listened, looking for anyone who appeared to be paying them too much attention.
Apparently, Dumbledore hadn't been seen by any members of the Privet Drive guards since the end of term. They'd been owling their reports, which wasn't entirely unusual, but still made Tonks curious. After Bill set the new wards at Privet Drive last night, she left to do some digging about what Dumbledore could have been doing all this time. From what she could gather, he's been meeting with Ministry officials trying to create a plan to deal with the Death Eaters, expecting them to go on the offensive now that Voldemort was out in the open. Four days ago he had been called into a closed door, secret Wizengamot meeting that no one had been allowed in or out of. The governing body had agreed to oust Fudge immediately, but had spent the remaining three days in session trying to agree on his replacement, choosing Rufus Scrimgeour as interim Minister in the end.
Hermione interrupted, expressing her disapproval of the Wizengamot making such decisions without even informing the people. Tonks defended the decision, saying desperate times called for desperate measures, and they couldn't run the risk of the Death Eaters finding out and taking advantage of so many important people in one place. Ginny grew impatient with all of it.
She cut off Hermione's next question with one of her own, "What does this have to do with Dumbledore?"
"I heard that Dumbledore was particularly agitated by the fact that they were detained for so long and took off immediately after they were released. None of the usual sources saw or even heard what he was up to until you all saw Snape last night. From his little mission, it seems like he was up to something dangerous."
Their conversation ended abruptly as Harry was shoved unceremoniously into her by Bill. "Put on the cloak you two," he hissed.
Before she had time to process what was happening, Harry had thrown the cloak over them and gripped her by the waist, pulling her flush against him. Under the cloak, the position felt especially intimate and was interrupting her ability to think clearly. When he moved them into the small space between Hermione and Tonks, she understood that he was trying to make them as small as possible. To any outsider, it would just look like there was a polite distance between the two women, but Ginny was only a hair away from both.
No sooner had they secured their position did Ginny see the reason why. Percy was following a rather important-looking man out of Gringotts. The man - who Ginny vaguely recognized as being a higher-up from the Auror office - radiated irritation until his gaze fell on their group and his eyes lit with opportunity. His wild mane of hair made the expression resemble that of a hungry lion catching sight of prey, as did his determined pace as he approached them.
Bill had kept the group walking forward toward the bank. When they met, he feigned surprise at seeing his brother. "Hey Perce," he said, ignoring the other man for the time and giving his younger brother a hug. "It's been a few days. What have you been up to?"
Percy returned his brother's hug stiffly, scanning the group over Bill's shoulder. "Hello, William. I've been engaged in Ministry business," he replied, gesturing to the other man. "Allow me to introduce the three of you to the new Minister of Magic," Percy said officiously. Ginny noticed the tension in his features that belied the tone - he was nervous, his eyes still darting in every direction, probably making sure she was nowhere in sight.
"Rufus Scrimgeour," the lion-haired man said formally, shaking their hands as he greeted them all.
"As nice as it was to meet you, sir," Bill said graciously, "I need to be getting to work," he lied. "Tonks, can you escort them for me?"
"No problem," she said brightly. "It'll give me more time to chat with Ron here," she said with a wink.
Scrimgeour looked displeased, but bid her brother farewell without issue. Bill said his goodbyes and left, leaving her and Harry behind. Ginny was fairly sure they were supposed to follow him, but neither made any attempt to. The alley was rather full at present - they were at risk of bumping into someone if they moved away from the bubble of space their group had created and drawing more attention to themselves.
Once Bill was out of sight, the minister turned to Tonks. "Good to see you, Auror Tonks. You are off-duty today, are you not? What brings you to the Alley with Mr. Weasley and Miss Granger?"
At some point before they began conversing with the Minister, Tonks had turned her hair into its usual bubblegum pink, giving the impression that everything was normal. She smiled at the Minister's question, and gestured to Hermione and Ron. Brightly, she said,"I just ran into these two being escorted to Flourish and Blotts by Bill Weasley. I was just asking Ron here about his older brother. Charlie and I graduated Hogwarts together, and it's been quite some time since I've seen him." Ginny watched in awe as her friend's cheeks began to glow with the classic Weasley flush - something Ginny knew was the result of her impressive metamorphagi skills rather than embarrassment. In a clear attempt to redirect the man, she said, "Congratulations on your new position, sir. I'm certain you'll lead us in the right direction."
The difference between Scrimgeour and Fudge was readily apparent as he ignored the praise entirely and focused his attention on Ron. "Speaking of your family, Mr. Weasley, your brother and I were at The Burrow just this morning. It seems your family has not been staying there," the Minister said, fishing for information. He shot Percy a displeased look as he continued, "Seeing as you are here in London, as well as at least four other members of your family, it seems your brother was mistaken when he suggested that your mother may have taken you out of the country on holiday."
Percy was flushing as he looked at the ground. "I haven't been to the Burrow since the night before the last Wizengamot meeting. How was I to know that they wouldn't be there?" Warmth grew in Ginny's chest at his words. He hadn't prioritized his job over them - he'd known they weren't there before he agreed to take the Minister. He looked up at the Minister and continued a bit more stubbornly, "I only said it was a possibility, sir. If you knew my mother, I'm sure you'd agree."
Ginny couldn't help but smile. His resistance, little as it was, made her inexplicably happy. She hadn't seen him do anything but rapidly agree with authority figures since he was a child. Her brother looked and sounded more like a Weasley in the last few moments than he had in years.
Scrimgeour was giving Percy a calculating look. There was an edge to his gaze that gave Ginny the impression he was reevaluating her brother and wondering if he should be considered friend or foe. Hermione drew his attention.
"He's right, Minister Scrimgeour," she said, her voice ringing with false enthusiasm. "Mrs. Weasley took Ginny to visit her great Aunt, I believe. But Ron here," she said, inserting herself into the crook of his arm, looking nervous and unnatural, "has been staying with me. My parents wanted to spend some time with him and get to know him better. I'm their only daughter, you see, and they really only know him through my letters. Of course, they have met, but only in passing moments, and that's really not enough time to determine one's character, is it?" She finished with a breath, staring up into her brother's eyes and batting her lashes in a way that was completely unlike her. Ginny noticed the squeeze she gave to prompt Ron when all he did was stare down at her in surprise.
"Yeah," he said, jumping a little. "It's right scary, you know? It's all new and I have no idea what I'm supposed to be saying to her sometimes. How am I supposed to talk to her dad? He probably wants to have me carted off to Azkaban."
Hermione giggled. It was still put-on, Ginny knew, but there was real amusement hidden in her exasperated reply. "He's a muggle, Ron. I doubt he even knows what Azkaban is."
Ginny hadn't realized she'd allowed herself to be sucked into their show - trying to determine what truths had been slipped in through the lies, really - until Ron's attempt to reply was cut off by Scrimgeour.
He was unamused as he interrupted, "As interesting as all this is, I must ask what of your friend Harry Potter?" Ginny felt Harry tense behind her and she squeezed the arm he had wrapped around her in assurance.
"What about him?" Ron asked, tightening his hold on Hermione and pulling her closer.
"Mr. Potter fought with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and managed to survive again. That is quite a feat. Some have suggested that he is 'The Chosen One'," he said, looking at them intently, but neither one of them had anything to tell, nor would they willingly give the man information on Harry even if they did. "I imagine most of our world is curious about what he is doing with his time away from school."
Hermione and Ron had been staring into each other's eyes from their intimate position, looking for all the world as if they were just smitten with each other to the point of distraction, but Ginny noticed they were silently communicating. Ron shrugged and responded, "Harry should be at his relatives, same as every year. We never hear from him until at least two weeks into the summer."
"Hopefully we'll be seeing him sooner this year, though. After everything that happened with The Prophet, Professor Umbridge and then at the Ministry, he's had a rather difficult year and should be with people who love and understand him," Hermione said, sounding very earnest as she finally looked away from Ron and at Scrimgeour, "Don't you think, Minister?"
The Minister's jaw clenched, clearly recognizing that Hermione was quietly expressing her disapproval of not only the previous Minister's treatment of Harry, but also Scrimgeour's own interest in him. "Perhaps," he said in an unnaturally even tone. He looked them over again, that same calculating expression he had given Percy present on his face. "Very well, then. Let us go, Mr. Weasley. We spent far too much time with that goblin anyway and we have much to do. Enjoy your shopping." There was an irritated gait to his walk as he strode off down the Alley.
Percy cast them a hurried goodbye, hugging his brother very quickly and setting off at a quick pace to catch up to the Minister. Both men disappeared into the crowd quickly. Moody's voice yelling, "Constant Vigilance!" echoed in her mind; the fact that she could no longer see them didn't mean that they weren't still being watched, she knew.
Ginny placed an invisible hand on Tonks. The Auror looked directly at Ron and Hermione, but spoke quietly to Harry and Ginny. "You two keep the cloak on and get to the bank. We'll go to Flourish and Blotts in case Scrimgeour is still watching." More loudly, she said, "Come on, lovebirds. It's only going to get more crowded if we keep waiting."
Thankfully, Tonks was able to maneuver through the crowd in such a way that it appeared their natural path had taken their little group to just in front of Gringotts. It allowed Harry and Ginny to successfully enter the bank without drawing attention to themselves.
Ragnok wasn't able to meet with them regarding the Potter account that day. Apparently, he was the goblin Scrimgeour had been meeting with that morning and they had spent a great deal of time arguing about something. That was what Griphook told them, anyway.
The lower-level goblin was happy enough to schedule a future appointment and provide them with copies of all the forms they signed at their last meeting. Their findings were quite a surprise, though Ginny hadn't wanted to talk about it in the office Bill shared with the other curse breakers where they had been allowed to look over them. It wasn't until they had convinced Bill, who had been persuaded to consult on another curse breaker's assignment, that they could go to Ollivander's without waiting for Tonks to return that she finally said what had been nagging at her.
"How could you not have noticed that you signed for Bellatrix Lestrange's vault?" she asked Harry, incredulity in her tone.
Harry huffed and responded tersely, "I was worried about you. I didn't care what I was signing."
She tried to backtrack a bit, "I know that. I appreciate it, but… it's Bellatrix. After everything she's taken from us - from people we know - I would have thought that would have stuck out."
He stopped walking and looked down at her with guarded eyes. "Are you honestly telling me that if the situation was reversed, you would have been paying more attention to paperwork than if I was okay?"
His question hit her with more impact than he probably intended. Countless instances of being nearly out of her mind with worry over him flashed through her mind in an instant - the rogue bludger, the Chamber, the dementors, the tournament… most recently when he ran after Bellatrix at the Ministry. The wave of memories left her feeling like every inch of her had been soaked with frigid water.
When she pulled herself out of her daze, Harry had resumed walking and was several places ahead of her. She hurried to catch up to him, placing a hand on his elbow and pulling him to a stop when she did. The contact served to do more than just force him to look at her - it also washed away the coldness of the memories. The knowledge that he was here and alright warmed her like nothing else could.
"I'm sorry," she said contritely. "You're right. I wouldn't have given a damn about any of that if you were suffering." She didn't look away, but held her breath while waiting for his response. She knew how moody Harry could be when he was hurt, and her surprise had made her insensitive with her comments.
Harry blew out a breath and nodded. Ginny unconsciously mimicked the action. He didn't say anything, but held her hand to his arm and resumed their walk. He didn't speak again until they came into view of Ollivander's.
"Why were you so adamant about about coming here alone?" he asked curiously, apparently completely over her earlier insensitivity.
She cringed. If she were being honest, her nerves had been mounting since they arrived at Gringotts and she withdrew some money from her vault by way of the goblin at the teller counter. It was probably why she had wanted to fixate on their acquisition of Bellatrix Lestrange's vault in the first place, as a means to avoid thinking about the wand shop.
Uncomfortably, she admitted, "It took me forever to find my current wand. It felt like I tried almost every wand in the store, but nothing fit. Ollivander even pulled Mum aside and talked to her. I eventually found one, but…" she trailed off.
"But?" Harry prodded gently.
"It was kind of embarrassing?" she said, feeling ridiculous and embarrassed now at the admission. It sounded more like a question than a statement, and she felt her cheeks heat.
Apparently not expecting that, he asked in surprise, "Embarrassing how?"
She sighed and avoided eye contact. They were almost to Ollivander's now, and hopefully their arrival would put an end to the conversation. She hadn't meant for the admission to open the door to that line of questioning. Her feelings of inadequacy plagued her enough without her consciously focusing on them.
Harry won't judge you, a reassuring voice in her mind said.
Despite her apprehension, the words came tumbling out as she elaborated, "It felt like none of the wands were choosing me because I didn't deserve it. Maybe because of what had happened in the Chamber, or because I wasn't powerful enough or something. Ron's wand set off all these sparks when he first touched it, but when I finally found my wand, it wasn't an impressive show like that. Even Ollivander looked displeased by the match."
She had spent enough time talking that the store was just before them, and she pulled away from Harry slightly, keeping hold of only his hand and dragging him along as she picked up the pace; she didn't want him to have the opportunity to respond. She'd rather just get it out of the way than spend time talking about it. Why did she always admit things like that to him? She was usually better at keeping her mouth shut.
Mr. Ollivander was standing behind the counter expectantly when she entered. She paused in the doorway, but as she was towing Harry just behind her, she had to move toward the strange man. The door shut behind them, and her nerves rose as the feeling of being trapped hit her. Stop being stupid, she scolded herself.
She took a deep breath and put a polite smile on her face, greeting him with a, "Hello, Mr. Ollivander. I was hoping you would be willing to help me get a new wand today."
Mr. Ollivander ran a critical eye over her, his hands steepled before his mouth. Ginny could have sworn she felt the weight of his eyes as his gaze roamed. She felt Harry step closer and place his hand on her back. She couldn't bring herself to resent the fact that she felt comforted by his presence - there had always been something terribly creepy about Ollivander in her opinion, like he was seeing through you instead of looking at you. His next words confirmed her belief.
"It is quite fortunate to see you again, my dear, though I did not expect to meet you again as a lady of House Black." The man spread his hands out and shrugged. "It matters not, really. In truth, it may make the particular wand I've been holding for you even more agreeable."
Ginny was distracted from asking how he knew about her status as a Black by his last comment. "What do you mean 'holding for me'? Why would you do that?"
"Ah, yes. Well, we had so much difficulty finding your new wand, remember dear?" He didn't wait for her nod, but continued, "Your magic was not quite your own at the time, and I had already begun creating one that would have been just right for you, that would help you gain control over the lingering… invading magic." He sighed heavily, "Alas, your mother was not receptive to the idea. There would have been a wait for it, you see, and personalized wands are rather expensive. She insisted it was not necessary. But I knew… I knew this wand could only be meant for you. I believe it's been getting impatient waiting for your return."
Ginny's mind was awhirl as he turned around and walked into the back room to retrieve the wand he had apparently held on to for her. She had thought it was odd that she was getting a new wand, but here he had been expecting her to return. She knew he claimed that the wand chose the user, but he spoke about it as if it were sentient.
Harry broke her from her reverie. She had forgotten he was touching her until she felt him rub her back a little. Quietly, as if not to disturb the silence of the shop, he said, "There's nothing wrong with having trouble finding a wand. I did too, you know. My wand -" He looked uncomfortable and dropped his gaze as he asked, "You've heard the story about it being brother wands with Voldemort's, right?"
"Yes," she replied quietly. She knew the connection between the two wands had likely saved Harry's life, but the fact that it reflected the connection between him and Tom must have been disconcerting for him, especially at eleven when he knew next to nothing about his history with the dark wizard or the prophecy that tied them together.
"It's strange," he said, echoing her thoughts, "but it felt like mine immediately. Even though it's connected to him, I wouldn't trade it for anything. It feels like an extension of me." His mouth lifted into a lopsided smile as he continued, "It sounds like this wand will be like that for you. I'm a little worried you may be better than me now, actually, if you were that talented before with a wand not suited to you."
She snorted and gave him a little shove in exasperation. "I'm sure," she said sarcastically. She smiled at him in gratitude and said softly, "Thank you."
Mr. Ollivander's return prevented further discussion, though Ginny felt better for the exchange. The box he carried was surprisingly dusty, as if it had been placed somewhere all these years and left untouched, by hand or by magic. Clearly he had fetched it by hand instead of summoning it; even now, the wand-maker handled it gingerly, the box balanced on his open palm as he held it out for her to take. He's so odd, Ginny couldn't help but think as she stepped forward and reached out.
His treatment of it affected her and she found herself emulating his behavior. Despite the fact that it was still boxed and she hadn't laid eyes on it - let alone held it yet - she could almost feel a hum go through her as she took possession of it. It was unlike anything she'd felt with either of her previous wands, even when actively casting with them. Her hand trembled foolishly as she lifted the lid.
The first thing she noticed was that it was unmistakably made of yew. As her previous two wands had both been made of the same, she was intimately familiar with its meaning. She distinctly remembered showing Bill her new wand when they arrived in Egypt and the horror she had felt when Percy had, in his usual pretentious manner, informed them that yew was associated with the power of life and death and then provided them with a long list of notorious wizards who had possessed yew wands. Bill had forever secured his place as her favorite brother by giving Percy a dressing down that rivaled her mother's worst and then explaining that yew favored powerful individuals and were often possessed by protectors.
The second thing she noticed was the length. It was shorter than she was used to. Probably even shorter than the nine and a quarter inch wand she had seen choose Ron the last time she had been here. It didn't bother her too much, honestly, but was rather interesting. She smiled as she remembered Fred once commenting that size was no indication of power, referencing her as an example.
Reassured by the memory, she confidently took it into her hand. The hum that had only been hinted at before was now spreading through her like a wave coming out of the wand, up her arm, and directly into her heart. Instead of the flash of sparks she had typically seen associated with a wand choosing, there was a glowing golden mist interspersed with glittering bits of red that surrounded her in what felt like an uplifting embrace.
When the mist settled, she looked at the wand again in surprise. It still felt warm in her hand, though the humming sensation was only noticeable now if she truly concentrated. Despite looking relatively similar to her other wands, the experience was unlike she had ever felt before.
The only thing indiscernible from a glance was the core. She had never known the core of her first wand either, it's original owner having been several generations back from someone on her mother's side of the family. Though she did know that her second wand, the one that had seemed to reluctantly choose her, had a core of unicorn hair, which was said to stabilize the users magic and help overcome blockages. She finally looked up at Ollivander in question.
"I have no doubt you recognize that it is made of yew, a wood you should be quite familiar with by now." She nodded, looking back down at the familiar wood type as he carried on, "It measures just a smidge over nine inches, and it's core, I believe, was gifted to me especially for you." Her eyes shot back to his in surprise. Her curiosity was so strong that she wasn't even anxious at how his disturbingly wide eyes stared unblinkingly into hers. "At the end of May in 1993," Ginny felt Harry stiffen in response as she sucked in a breath, the significance of the time not lost on either of them, "I received a feather from a particular phoenix, one who had only given two feathers before," he said, his eyes shifting to Harry.
"Fawkes donated another feather?" Harry asked, his voice shaking slightly. Still, it was better than what Ginny could manage - she couldn't find her voice at all.
"Indeed, Mr. Potter," he replied. He turned his attention back to her then and continued, "I assume it was at this time that your magic became afflicted, and you became… acquainted with the creature in some manner."
Ginny nodded and had to swallow several times before she felt like she could speak. Her voice came out very faint when she finally forced out, "Yes."
Harry seemed to snap out of his daze at the sound. He stepped forward and gripped her free hand. There was a trembling to his grasp that made her wonder if he was seeking or offering comfort with the gesture.
In it a tight voice, he asked, "What does it mean?" His hand contracted around hers.
Mr. Ollivander looked at Harry in surprise. "It means you are all connected. I should think you would know that better than I."