"Dear Diary,
Day 2926
The war has taken a toll on my family. 8 years since I've been to the spirit world and now my real world is falling apart. When The War started my dad was laid off from his job and forced to join the military. My mom now serves as a nurse for the medical unit in the military. My dad died after the first year of the war. He got taken and held captive for 6 months, they starved him and then slowly tortured him to insanity before pulling the trigger on him. My mom was on the medical team the day that my father came back and she was the third person to see him. My mom was never the same after she saw my life was father laying out on a stretcher withered to bones and covered in blood and bruises.
I'm in a private school training between self-defense and Medical Care. I want to be full of Courage like my father I'm full of wisdom like my mother. I'm trying so hard to be a daughter they would be proud of. How can I make my mother happy and proud of me, when she's never here to see me succeed. I don't know who could be proud of me. All my family back home are dead. They were all seen as traitors to the attackers. I'm all that's left of my bloodline besides my mom. I have no friends, I'm afraid to let anyone in anymore. My best friend that I trained with for three years was taken out the day after her birthday. She was only 17. She's been gone for over a year now. When she was killed I locked myself away from everybody and swore not to make any friends. I don't want to be hurt anymore and I can't take having to watch another person that I love and care about be taken away from me.
It seems so long ago when I visited the spirit world. Sometimes I think about the friendships I made there just to get me through the day. Mother is no good to talk to, it's like talking to a brick wall. She no longer shows any emotion, but of course I don't blame her. Her and dad were best friends, childhood sweethearts as I remember. Sometimes when I'm feeling extra alone, I'll sit and think about Haku. His love and kindness and gentleness it's something that I miss right about now.
I don't know if I'm making mother proud, but I know Granny would be proud. Zaniba was a sweet soul, I miss her, but most of all I miss how she was so understanding. I need that right now.
I miss all my friends. I miss Zaniba, Lynn, no face, the boiler man, my baby friend, and the crow, but most of all, I miss Haku.
If love was ever a real thing, I came to know it in the spirit world. It may have been difficult when I was there, but it's the most alive I've ever felt. I miss it. I missed the weird version of acceptance that I received their. I even miss the soot sprites that always made sure my shoes were clean and my clothes were folded.
It's been so long sometimes I wonder if it was all a dream. I still have my hair bow, I wear it as a bracelet now. That is one of the main things that help me know that it wasn't, the other thing is the undeniable love that I have for Haku. I so desperately wish that I could go back. Would he still be there waiting for me? Or would he have moved on to bigger and better things. Would he have went home where he can be free? What would be the point of going back? The only reason I would go back would be for him and all my friends there.
I know I talked about the spirit world a lot lately, but it is one of the few good memories that I have anymore. I'm sorry diary, I know that you have to hear my issues everyday. It helps me stay sane. Good night for now. I have a big day ahead of me tomorrow."
Chihiro closed her diary and put it in her nightstand along with her pin and close the drawer. She went outside to sit and watch the Moon glisten over the Open Sea. This was a nightly ritual she used to help calm her mind from the days turmoil. Their Little Shack of a house seem to creak with the Wind. There was smoke damage on the shutters from the fires of the bombs that came when the war first started. She had to consider the her and her mom we're lucky to even still have a house.
She watched as the waves crashed against the rocks and reminisced on watching the water in the Moonlight with Lynn back when she was at the bathhouse. This night in particular she was missing the spirit world more than normal. After sitting on the porch for what seemed like hours thinking silently to herself, she got up picked her candle up off the floor, and made her way back inside closing the door behind her.
She crept past her mom who was sleeping on the couch and made her way back to her bed on the floor in her bedroom. She blew out her candle and tucked herself in and listened to the waves crashing outside to slowly soothe herself to sleep. She dreamed about the spirit world again.
She dreamed of seeing Haku in his Dragon form. She dreamed that they were flying through the sky and she was talking to him, telling him about how she wanted to stay in the spirit world with him. Its a dream that she has had many times before. The dreams about Haku always entranced her enough to sleep through the night and forget about all the troubles of her life.