"And this is where the Professor Lion heart's cremated remains are sealed," said Jaune. He'd been continuing to give Pyrrha a tour of Salem's castle and enjoyed showing her everything to see. She was particularly interested in the shredded petitions to have her brought back to rwby.

"Did that many people really believe I'd come back?" she asked.

"Yeah, pretty much," said Jaune. "I'm surprised you didn't know about any of that."

"I was too busy being stuck in limbo."

"Yeah. Good point."

"And my balls are stored right-"

"HALT!" Said a very edgy voice from behind.

Jaune turned around and immediately scowled at who had just spoken.

"What is with all these sudden appearances?" he moaned.

"This isn't a sudden appearance," said Adam Taurus. "This is vengeance in the form of me. Adam Taurus. Seeker of vengeance and pussy obliterator—"

"What?" Jaune couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Uh…I think he means…Blake?" said Pyrrha.

Jaune cocked his head for a second before finally putting two and two together. It was hard to focus on any individual thought because he had no idea what would come next. All he wanted was to give Pyrrha a tour and now he had the embodiment of a teenage edge lord interrupting him.

"Don't you have a screed to give somewhere?" asked Jaune. "How did you even get in here?"

"I entered this realm when I lost my soul to fighting the tyranny of humankind."

Jaune groaned and slammed his head against a wall.

"Stop that," said Pyrrha. "You'll knock yourself out!"

"THAT'S. THE. POINT."

"I'll have you know that I was invited by your agent," said Adam.

Jaune lifted his newly bruised face off the wall to look at Adam.

"Yes," Adam continued. "I am here to promote my newly revealed character short, and volume six by extension."

"They gave you a character short?" Jaune spat. "It should have gone to me."

"You were considered for a cameo, but there we already had enough pussies casted."

"STOP WITH THE PUSSY PUNS."

Pyrrha giggle just a little at the absurdity of the situation.

Jaune turned away from Adam again as he tried to find a way to lose him. Adam was known as the "party plague" by nearly everybody in the rwbyverse. He never smiled and spent every second of his life on insane conspiratorial rants. How this guy managed to find work as a character was beyond Jaune.

"So how long do you plan on staying here?" asked Jaune. "I'm sort of already assigned with Salem."

"I'm only here for a brief second," said Adam.

"Thank the Gods."

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Let's go."

Jaune continued to give a tour of the castle while Adam awkwardly stood beside them. He'd occasionally say something weird that would get ignored every time. It was probably one of the most unpleasant moments in Jaune's life.

While Jaune dealt with tour, Salem had just been told some very disturbing news by Tyrian.

"Are you sure that's what you saw?" she asked, eyes blazing red at the revelation of Pyrrha's arrival.

"Oh yes," said Tyrian. "Saw her with my own two eyes…so what are you going to do? Are you going to kill the boy? Rip his kidney out and feed it to the Grimm?"

Salem rolled her eyes at Tyrian's suggestions.

"I believe a lesson in humiliation will be needed."

Tyrian's grin grew wider as she told him her plan.

"Do we get to the part where the humans are crucified and hung to dry?" Adam asked after being shown a painting of Tyrian looking bravely across a battlefield.

"That never happened," said Jaune. "NOTHING YOU'VE SAID HAS EVER HAPPENED."

"Yes it has," Adam countered.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO IT HASN"T!"

"Yes it has. I wrote an entire fanfiction about it. It's about a Faunus warlord who impales his conquests on bloodies spears and—"

Jaune groaned out loud as Tyrian continued to spill his bizarre fantasy.

Jaune was then impaled by Adam's sword, groaning loudly as blood drew from the corners of his mouth. Next came Pyrrha, screaming in anguish as her lover fell to the blade of Adam Taurus. He was a strapping young man with the body of a God and an intellect that surpassed even the brightest minds in Remnant.

With one smirk, Adam looked out at the world that was now his.

ALL. HAIL. ADAM.