Rook collapsed against a cold stone wall across from a painting of an emaciated horse chewing on a bright red violin. Rook stared at it despairingly. In retrospect, she really ought to have asked one of the teachers for directions back in the Great Hall, but... she was embarrassed. After all the fuss made over her late admission, she could not bring herself to approach a teacher and admit to such a stupid mistake. Unfortunately, the alternative was feeling worse by the minute.

She had not been sitting long, however, when she heard distant, muffled footsteps approaching her. Rook scrambled to her feet and strained her ears, listening carefully as the sounds grew gradually louder.

Fred and George appeared from behind a tapestry Rook had thought to be draped over solid wall. George held a finger over his lips and motioned silently for Rook to join them behind the tapestry. Rook obliged, hardly believing her luck.

The secret passageway was dark and cramped, but Fred's wand illuminated a piece of parchment he determinedly shielded from Rook's purview as he consulted it carefully. Rook said nothing, heeding George's earlier gesture, correctly guessing that students were not exactly allowed to wander the castle at this late hour.

"All right, Rook?" George whispered, smiling down at her. He and Fred were not particularly tall, but at such close proximity, George seemed to tower over Rook. Rook nodded in reply, thankful for the semidarkness that concealed the pink tinge in her cheeks. "Lost?"

"How did you-?"

"The library is clear," said Fred, looking up. "Let's go, then."

With absolutely no explanation, Fred and George guided Rook to a massive library, Fred leading the way with his, apparently fascinating, bit of old parchment. Once they were safely concealed in a shadowy corner of the deserted library, the twins began explaining themselves in hushed voices.

"We noticed you in the corridor on our way to the library and we thought you might be interested in a little game."

The twins presented an immense volume to Rook who examined it in the low light of Fred's wand, which remained lit.

"'School Rules'?" she read the cover questioningly.

"If you're willing, we would like to challenge you to break seven school rules-"

"-of our choosing-"

"-before sunrise," the twins spoke in unison, as they seemed prone to do. Rook acknowledged her growing fondness for them.

"That's the game?"

"It's more of a tradition, really," Fred amended. "But George thought you might be a good sport, so..."

"You said you just saw me on your way to the library," said Rook, eyes narrowed in suspicion. "And what is that?" She pointed at the parchment in Fred's hand and he hastily folded it and tucked it away into his robes.

"It's a sort of... tool of our trade," George answered vaguely. "If you win, we'll show you."

Fred looked as though he wanted to protest, but was reluctant to discuss the matter before a third party.

Rook considered the twins' challenge. There were so many reasons this "game" was ill-advised, not counting the seven rules she would have to break. She barely knew these boys. On top of that, their hair was the color of danger in every safety manual she had encountered, and of violins horses eat in Surrealist paintings. Still, Rook found herself intrigued in spite of her better judgment.

"Okay." Rook sank to the floor and heaved the Hogwarts rule book into her lap. "What kinds of rules are we talking about?"

George took a seat at Rook's side and peered over her shoulder as she cracked the volume.

"Well, they have to be rules he haven't broken before," said Fred.

"Then this one won't do," George pointed at the book as it lay in Rook's lap. Rook was beginning to suspect that Fred and George did not place much stock in the concept of personal space. "'It is against school rules to impersonate a prefect.' We impersonate Percy all the time."

"Percy?"

"Our brother," Fred rolled his eyes. "Percy the Perfect Prefect."

"Percy the Prancing Prat."

"Percy the Pickled Piper Pooping Pies of Plump Peppers," Rook joined in.

"What?"

"Sorry... I-I thought we were doing alliteration. I got carried away."

Fred kneeled before Rook and looked her dead in the eye. "Are you serious?" he whispered softly, his expression inscrutable.

Taken aback though she was at Fred's sudden propinquity, Rook matched his deadpan tone and replied, "Almost never."

Fred scrutinized her carefully, but Rook neither broke eye-contact nor changed her expression.

"In that case..." Fred's face broke into a wide grin as he whisked the rule book out of Rook's lap. "I think I've got our first 'challenge'." Fred stood rod-straight and read aloud in a comically official voice, "'No student shall be allowed to toboggan down any spiral staircase within Hogwarts Castle.'"

Rook blinked. "Wait-toboggan?"

"That's what it says."

"Genius," Rook murmured, imagining herself climbing to the topmost level of Hogwarts Castle and taking each staircase by toboggan.

"Now you pick one for us-"

"We'll tell you if we've done it."

Rook accepted the proffered book from Fred and flipped through the pages until she found something interesting. She cleared her throat and read, "'Neither students nor staff members shall be allowed to kiss or caress the grotesque guarding the Headmaster's office."

"Grotesque?" said George, confused.

"Like a gargoyle-" Fred and Rook spoke in unison and he stopped short, glaring at her as though she had tricked him.

"What else have we got?" Fred changed the subject irritably.

The three of them spent the next hour perusing the Hogwarts rule book, which was longer than any Rook had ever seen, owing to Hogwarts's antiquity as well as various factors such as magic, environment, and adolescent hormones. Multiple times Rook and the twins lost control of their volume, forgetting that it was the middle of the night and reticence was a must.

"No way! Fred, check this out! 'Students are henceforth prohibited from practicing engorgement charms on inhabitants of Black Lake.'"

"You reckon that's how the giant squid happened?"

"There's a giant squid in the lake?!" Rook exclaimed.

"Maybe the ghosts know more about that. Speaking of ghosts, 'It is against the rules to gloatingly play the bagpipes in front of any of the Hogwarts ghosts.' And apparently it's against the rules to er... make a pass at a Professor."

"Is that so?"

"That's not surprising," said Rook.

Fred and George exchanged an impish look and turned back to Rook. "Not surprising, no..."

"'Scuse us," said Fred, turning George away from Rook and whispering so quietly, Rook only caught snippets of their consultation.

"...yes, but who? Binns?"

"Nah, nothing phases him. I think..."

"What? No, much too likable... but maybe..."

"Perfect!"

The twins turned back to Rook, their expressions wicked.

"You have to write a love letter to Professor Snape. We're going to watch you write it and slide it under his office door."

Rook was dumbstruck. "What?!"

"Don't tell me you're calling it quits already, Rook?" Fred smirked.

"'Course not!" Rook assured him emphatically. She was not sure why she was already so invested in the twins' game. She supposed simply because she liked them so much and it seemed meaningful to them.

"Then that tallies up our rules to break to an equal seven versus seven."

"Not really-I mean, I have seven, but you have three and a half between the two of you."

"Then you should have brought your twin, shouldn't you?" George teased. Rook had told them about her adoptive muggle family and her sister, Sia, who could not attend Hogwarts.

"What was I thinking? Oh well. Guess I had better start on that letter."

Rook found spare parchment and quills set aside for students to take notes during the day and set to work. After about two drafts, she had perfected the note and presented it for the twins' review.

Dearest Professor Snape,

From the moment I laid my eyes upon you, I was smitten. Your hair flows as gloriously as the tresses of some ancient and all-powerful God of Virility. Your eyes contain unfathomable depths, sweeping me off to realms I never knew existed until the moment you entered my life.

Let my words, inadequate as they may be to describe your endless majesty, reach your heart and rest in your soul until the day you realize that you and I were always meant to be together, until the end of time.

Passionately Yours,

Rosemary Rook

Fred and George collapsed in a fit of laughter upon examining the heartfelt missive.

"This is too good!"

Once they had recovered somewhat, Fred spoke, "You don't have to use your real name, though. Let's give you an alias." Fred eyed her with what seemed to be mounting approval. "Can't have you expelled before you even go to a class."

"Or worse-Snape falling for you."

Rook blushed vividly this time and quickly busied herself with the parchment in an effort to hide her face. She pondered for a moment and then signed:

Corvus Frugilegus

She admired her handiwork for a moment, then stood.

"Let's do this thing."