THREE
Alex wakes up at five in the morning sweating bullets. It's still dark outside. She's been having those dreams again. The ones where nothing makes sense, and people aren't who they're supposed to be, and Michael is always dead. Michael will always be dead. She can't go back to sleep. So she fiddles on her phone, paces her room, tries her best not to go into a panic mode just because no one is around. Readies for school early. By seven sharp she's dressed, quietly eating a bowl of cereal before her mom is even awake. Once the clock hits seven fifteen, Alex heads out the door.
She can take the scenic route today, and so she does. It's only a few fence hops and squeezing through small spaces, dirtying herself up a bit in the process, but she doesn't care. The fresh air helps. Being alone doesn't. But being around people doesn't feel like the best option right now, especially not this early in the morning. When her breath still mists and she has to button up her jacket to keep warm. Upon arriving at Camena High, Alex goes straight for her classroom, keeping her head down as she swerves through people.
As the day goes on, she forgets. Ren and Nona are hanging out more, which is good, because that might give him the chance to make a move. She asks more about the mystery TA. Doesn't get too much. People aren't really willing to divulge information for free, and she didn't pack a lunch today, which meant she pretty much had nothing to give. Other than her actual wallet money, which— No. Just no.
It's weird to see the couch empty. Really, really weird. Even if she'd only really noticed the presence a few weeks ago, it still felt odd without the TA sitting in the back, working on his own plans. So Alex just… takes his seat. It's a couch, and she's had a long day, and no one else is sitting there. Which makes it even easier to focus, ironically. Maybe that's why he sits so far back? It's only speculation. During bouts of notes, she rips a full piece of paper from her notebook, keeping it off to the side on top of her binder and adding to it as she works. At the end of the class, Alex tucks it up into the cushions, careful to hide it so that no one would really look. Other than maybe the TA.
You'd better have a good reason for being gone today, because I still have questions to ask you.
And yeah, I know, accusing someone of breaking the law isn't great, but it was to get your attention! Also maybe to keep me from being bored out of my absolute mind, but that isn't really a problem anymore. Either way, mystery TA man, don't fuck up or something on my part.
PS: I don't giggle. I chortle, like a real woman.
-Alexandra
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Jonas is half relieved and half uneasy to miss a day from CHS. College level English is the bane of his existence, but in all honesty he thinks it might be easier than whatever the kids are doing in the APs at Camena. Still not his favorite thing.
There's a girl though, Katie, and after a few weeks of sitting next to each other bantering back and forth and making small talk about their lives outside of school she actually asked him out. Which was… weird. But kinda nice? Regardless, he said sure why not, and there are real actual Plans in his life now. Weekend plans that aren't just watching football or baseball or killing time and getting lectured by his dad to get out of the house and go explore Camena.
The next day it's back to TA-ing, using his mom's classroom as enforced study hall (a lot more helpful than he'd originally given it credit for, to be honest— as much as he doesn't want to admit it, the ban on cell phones and self-consciousness around using a laptop in class actually do kind of help him get some classwork done), and - apparently - Alex.
He hadn't expected to see her until 7th period, when he usually shows up before or during 5th - and he doesn't. He does, however, hear the crinkling of paper between his seat and the armrest. Not necessarily suspicious on its own, but there's a nagging feeling that he should take a look (or at the very least, trash whatever garbage has been stuffed there), and he finds the note.
You'd better have a good reason for being gone today, because I still have questions to ask you.
Lips curve into a sardonic smile despite himself, before he wipes the look off his face to check for witnesses. None. He shifts things around, flattens the note out and tucks it between the pages of his Comm 101 book, holding it maybe a little too vertically to help shield his face.
And yeah, I know, accusing someone of breaking the law isn't great, but it was to get your attention!
It would probably look a little weird to anyone to see him grinning at a communications textbook.
Also maybe to keep me from being bored out of my absolute mind, but that isn't really a problem anymore. Either way, mystery TA man, don't fuck up or something on my part.
He really shouldn't be enjoying this as much as he is. He tries to school his face back into something passing for disinterest, but—
PS: I don't giggle. I chortle, like a real woman.
And Jonas practically snorts, like a real pig. Too quickly he tries to change it to a cough, and ends up actually choking for a moment.
"Jonas?"
He waves off his mom's concerned look, pounding a hand at the base of his throat and reaching for his water bottle because he legitimately nearly died over that. And now we pretend that never happened… Still, he's a little red. He can blame it on the whole choking business, though.
It takes him longer than he'd like to admit to finally clear his airway, and he pointedly ignores any looks from the class, the tips of his ears pink and he tries to give off an air of apathy, flipping blindly through his textbook. Great, now Miss BC had nearly killed him. Lovely.
His pen flicks in circles through his fingers, trying to draft a response in his head. Something that is super witty and mysterious - he's mystery TA man now, after all - but it's kinda difficult. It's stupid but… he sort of really wants her to like him. Even if she's maybe kind of insane.
"So Alex, ever been really sad on a beach?" Not the best opener here. But that's definitely how he knows her. Or some of how he knows her. There's also maybe something to do with hiking? But like… at night? Or maybe he's crazy. He forgot months of his life, it's fair something else would fill in the gaps. Whoever she is, she's as much of a mystery to him as he apparently is to her.
.
Being late for class wasn't the plan, but hey, that's happening. One of her study labs in Earth Sci had run long, and Alex had said she could finish for the rest of the group, and one thing lead to another… Yeah. She's late. She does her best not to slam into the door when she opens it, kicking it closed behind herself as she dips through a row of desks and over to the couch. She isn't even thinking about it. There's an open spot, the couch had been comfortable last time, and her laptop is on low battery and for some reason the only outlet worth shit in this classroom is right by that couch.
Of course the rest of the class is confused. Of course she doesn't notice where she's sitting until she's plugged in her laptop and started typing to catch up to what she's already missed on the notes. Because of course she doesn't. Maybe it's the fact that Alex just ran across half the school, or that she's in the process of retying her hair up, but spotting the mystery TA nearly startles her out of her skin when she glances over. This wasn't a smart move. Oh God. Great. She gnaws at the inside of her cheek, finishes tying her hair into her signature ponytail, and then does her best to ignore what's happening.
It isn't long before she has a note. Not from the TA, but from one of her classmates, tossed from a nearby seat.
Al, what the hell are you doing?
Great question! She doesn't know. Alex starts scribbling back a reply, huffing softly as she digs her knuckles into her temple.
.
She's… on his couch.
Why is she on his couch?
He's watching her silently, with raised brows, half expecting her to start babbling apologies. Or babbling in general. She seems a babbler. The note from her is gone but not forgotten, well hidden in the comm text as he works on 6th period's assignments.
Jonas is all too aware that he's not the only one attentive to Alex's odd seating choice. He turns back to his work (maybe a little stiffly, 'cause she's in his space now and that's a bit much), and thumbs a scrap of loose leaf down to edge out from the bottom of the worksheet of some kid named Dave with absolutely horrible handwriting.
Subtle, Alexandra.
Real subtle.
He scrawls it at the bottom like he's making a note on the sheet, shifts his position to further separate their work spaces (because it's not exactly a large couch), tilting the note toward her in the process, and keeps an eye toward the rest of the classroom to watch for witnesses.
.
I'm sitting on a couch, isn't it obvious? Asserting dominance.
That is such complete and utter bullshit. Alex finishes up on one note, tosses it, and then is instantly face to face with another one. Her face twists in guilt as she gathers up some more of her papers and finally comes to settle on her own side of the couch, one hand typing while the other writes back to the mystery TA on the corner of her notebook. Oh god this is horrible. This was so stupid.
I'm sorry! I was running on autopilot, and I sat here yesterday, and I was late so I didn't want to make a scene!
Which she ended up doing anyways. Jesus Christ. From what he can tell, she is actually sorry when she elbows the notebook off of her binder enough for him to see it, still gnawing at the inside of her cheek hard enough to start rubbing it down. She winces slightly when she goes deep enough to actually draw blood, running her tongue along the flesh with an annoyed expression.
Today has been just… great.
Nearly late to school, no lunch, forgot her wallet at home so she couldn't buy lunch, nearly forgot she had a speech to do in World History— It's like the universe just doesn't want her having a half-decent time. At this point? She wouldn't be surprised.
.
Jonas hesitates, 'cause he should probably let her do her classwork. It's probably a really really bad idea to keep distracting her. Especially in plain view of everyone else in the class, even if they are all the way at the back. In view of his mom. In view of that girl who is reading a note Alex just passed her and completely fails to hold back a laugh. On the plus side, the attention is on her now, and not them.
"Ooh, some insights on the first reading, Jess? I'd agree that Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, while definitely absurdist, as labeled, is really quite funny even just superficially."
With the heat off of them, and the girl scrambling to cover her outburst, Jonas frees his physics notebook and scribbles another note.
Now would that be classified a giggle or a chortle?
Cause I might call it more of a bark if I knew wtf it was about.
?
He wants to shoot her a look, and manages to do so once attention is back on his mom and her overt enthusiasm for Stoppard's play.
.
Alex glances at it, back to her notes, and then has to do a double take. Okay, that's just rude. Granted, she had suddenly invaded his usual space, which was also rude. But then again, she doesn't really keep score about that anymore. Though she waits a few moments to respond, still wanting to get at least a little bit ahead on her notes before starting a conversation. Again.
She can't really help the fact that she's grinning that crooked grin behind the monitor of her laptop as she writes, sliding it over using her pinky and ring fingers.
Told her I was asserting dominance.
Also, that was a snort. Not a bark.
Learn your women dude, seriously.
A little bit of a joke, a little bit of a jab. Now that people are more focused on both the sudden laughter and the class, they're at least out of the main fire. It's only some of the assholes that might keep questioning her. Alex can most certainly show them where to shove it.
.
Jonas has to hold back a snort of his own at her answer. Right. Dominance, okay. He chews his lip to keep from grinning, but still slips into a smirk. It helps that this is his mom's favorite play ever (and one he doesn't actually mind that much) and she can easily interpret his entertainment as memory of watching the film of it with her quoting over it the whole time. He'll probably feel differently after sitting through multiple periods of teenagers attempting to read Stoppard aloud, but hey, for now it's a good memory.
Hate to break it to you, but you're definitely not dominating the couch.
This couch is my bitch.
Shit, he's about to scratch the last line out but she's already seen it. Whoops. And why is he keeping a record of this? He's just providing hard evidence.
.
She has to cover her mouth to avoid laughing too hard, eyes squeezed shut against a closed-mouth grin. Alex tugs her lips underneath her teeth, and does her best to focus while writing back at the same time. It's getting easier as she goes along, since this isn't too terrible and one of the slow readers is up right now. Which means they have more time before she ends up having to read. She keeps one hand in her book, keeping track of pages, just so no one suspects anything.
Well, that's new.
I didn't know you had a sense of humor.
;)
Eh, fuck it. There's only a little bit of time anyways, and she isn't going to go down without a fight. At least, not right now. Patiently, Alex waits for his reaction, trying and failing to keep hair out of her face as she glances down to figure out where in the page they actually are.
.
God I'd hope so: with this face, how else will I get by?
Any advice from an expert?
He takes a second to actually change the assignment he's looking at, for appearances' sake, and trashes the page of loose leaf he'd been writing on earlier. He can't exactly pass off the next few lines as a single note, so he drags a finger along the key like he's copying down the points that should've been mentioned, as he writes on the notebook sticking out below.
She'll pick a faster talker, this play is all about the pacing. But then she sticks to the three (R/G/M) til the Player comes in. You're all clear.
Gonna watch the movie next week anyway - 1990. Weirdly good.
She'd cover a few scenes today, with discussion, a few more next week, and then a few days watching the film.
If you'll take the implied nerfing, just say you think you're missing some wordplay and she'll take it from there.
His mom is all about wordplay.
Shit, wait, he probably shouldn't be telling her this. Is this cheating? Shit, is this like… a punishable offense?
I told you nothing btw.
Like that will cover it.
.
I cannot believe the TA is helping me figure out patterns so that I can more readily prepare myself for utter defeat.
Thanks for the help though.
Alex is… kind of impressed, actually. Sure, she knew he wasn't completely on the straight and narrow, but this is white collar crime compared to beating some thug on school grounds. Is that how she equates the hierarchy now? With the mafia? More fun like that, anyways. Also, unfortunately for Alex, she's generally a pretty fast reader. Actual Shakespeare still kind of screws her up, but before all of the problems she'd run into, she'd been a pretty good student. Then she stopped caring.
How did you figure all that out? Just by sitting here and watching?
Because if so, that's kind of impressive.
Just a little.
"Alex!" her head perks up to attention when she's called, a humming noise in the back of her throat denoting that she'd heard. "Why don't you go ahead and read Guildenstern for us?"
"Oh. Uh. Okay?" At least she'd gotten the line before starting to write again. Otherwise, she would've been screwed. To most of her classmates surprise, she's actually going over the lines in an easier tone than others. Mrs. Long at least seems happy she picked well, winking a bit at Jonas before going back to her board.
Compared to the other students droning, Alex at least wouldn't put you to sleep instantly. "It must be indicative of something, besides the redistribution of wealth. List of possible explanations," She glances over to the TA, and then back to her page. Just a little impressive.
"One: I'm willing it. Inside where nothing shows, I am the essence of a man spinning double-headed coins, and betting against himself in private atonement for an unremembered past." Her eyebrows furrow a bit. That's an odd line. It isn't that it's familiar, or the same kind of odd she'd dealt with when meeting mystery TA for the first time, but it feels… keen to her spirit, in a sense.
"Two: Time has stopped dead, and a single experience of one coin being spun once has repeated ninety times…" A headache is coming on. Alex quietly prays it's just stress, and not whatever happened during— Well, whatever happened when she went blank. "On the whole, doubtful."
.
He really wasn't intending on watching this whole thing play out, but hey… it's a good play. Also it's kind of bugging him 'cause he's dealing with his own unremembered past at the moment and it feels a little on the nose. Then again, as his mother would say, that's the beauty of the thing. That is, if she knew what he was going through. Which she does not. Though, to be frank, the wink seems to imply something and God he hopes it isn't that she knows what's going on. (Regardless of her apparent approval.)
The reading has moved on, and Jonas's brow is furrowing, for the first time today really hearing as one student reads, "How long have you suffered from a bad memory?" And another, "I can't remember. " It doesn't go on much longer before his mom is taking a sidebar to explain syllogism, and this is one he's heard before. They used to play a game about it, on long car rides. A lot of play on those shitty rides to Missouri. A is C, B is A, so B is C. That kind of thing. He's weirdly excited to read their assignments after this, it's a good one.
Christ, he's becoming a nerd. Being a TA is making him a nerd.
I impress, good to know. Not like it's my job to know this shit or anything.
Or you're just really easily impressed?
.
It takes her a minute to notice the sliding of the notebook and tune out the rest of the reading in order to glance over at the new note. Her eyes roll a bit, but it seems good natured, as over the course of both her talking and Mrs. Long drawing a complex diagram around a chunk of text, Alex has deflated into the couch and closed her eyes. Mostly from the headache, and partially because she hadn't gotten enough sleep. But she freehands another reply, twiddling her pen between her fingers.
Ask Ren, if you really wanna know. I'm not that impressive myself.
I rely on other people to do that for me.
And my hair.
Her bright caribbean blue hair. It's the first thing that people notice about her now. Not who she is, not what she wears, but the waves that fall from her head. Alex prefers it that way. There had been multiple reasons for doing it, of course. One was because she kept seeing 'Michael's kid sister' in the mirror. Not Alex. Hell, not even Alexandra. Another because she didn't want anyone recognizing her, and she'd figured a new look might do that. But it hadn't, really, seeing as this is a relatively small town and near everyone knows everyone.
After a moment, Alex glances over to the mystery TA, and offers up a sad little smile. It's the exact same one from his dreams.
.
It's incredibly jarring. Just… bizarre. Jonas just stares for a second, 'cause that's just— that's her, except lit by the light filtered through the classroom windows instead of whatever weird fire he's imagined. He's completely out of it for a moment, pupils dilating in sheer focus, matching up the points in the image like he's checking a forgery. Then he frowns, looks away.
It's too weird.
The bell rings, the discussion of syllogism cut short with a disappointed "Shoot," from his mother, the assignment given, and Jonas is already on his feet. He turns like he's going to say something to Alex, but that would kind of ruin the illusion that they weren't just passing notes all period. And now he's up he can't exactly pass another note. Instead, he just hesitates for a second before scooping up the rest of his stuff, taking a moment to sort through the papers and stash the notes, realizing he still has papers to go through before leaving this afternoon. At least with his attention on the paperwork he can avoid acknowledging his awkward stare.
.
Alex is slower in packing her own stuff up, having to deal with a pretty wrecked charger and a finicky zipper. But she's writing on a sticky note pasted to her thigh as she hoists her backpack on, and then dumps the pen into whatever pocket of it is nearest before taking the note off of herself and sticking it to the mystery TA's forehead. It's backwards, but he can figure that out on his own time.
"See you around. Oh, and-" As she's headed out the door, Alex tips her head a bit toward the hall, and it feels like some weird inside joke that isn't much of a funny one. A secret signal. "Thanks for letting me steal your couch."
With that she's gone, blue hair bouncing behind her as she goes chasing after Ren and Nona. After all, they have plans for tomorrow. Local mall, maybe some Chinese, and then whatever they feel like for the rest of the weekend. Which for Alex will probably just be hanging around and binging on both pizza and Netflix shows. Nothing new. Of course Ren will be driving, because she has her license but no car, and Nona has access to cars but no license. The world works in mysterious ways.
.
Jonas snatches the note off his forehead almost as soon as it's on, stuffing it into his pocket. Really? In plain sight she's gonna go sticking notes to his head? Really? She's halfway gone before he manages, "Didn't let you, you just-" His voice falters, 'cause he's not about to raise it. What's the point. The class is dismissed. She's already left. No one really cares.
He moves his bag to an actual desk, fanning out the assignments and separating graded from ungraded as the last stragglers leave. The door is closed to blessed silence from the din of lockers opening and slamming shut in the hallway.
"So…" His mom is wiping down the whiteboard. She wrote the same chunk of text up before each period so she could diagram it live. Talk about loving your work. She shoots him a too-innocent sidelong glance. "Quite the Guildenstern."
"Rosencrantz?"
It's an easy misdirection, one she's well aware of even as she grins. "'Don't you discriminate at all? '"
"You know, you've turned me into a nerd."
"I've turned you into a cultured young man," she argues, smiling down at her desk. "And so responsible." She's teasing him now. "And handsome."
"English doesn't make you handsome, that's… racist?"
Hazel eyes dart to him with a grim smile at the false accusation. "Not English. Literature."
"Hate to break it to you; literature doesn't make you handsome either."
"Really? And your neighbor today was…?"
"Not— Well—" He's about to say it wasn't the literature that attracted her to him, and make a comment about just being naturally good-looking - 'cause that's just how they banter - but that would imply that Alex was flirting with him. Which she obviously wasn't. "We literally just sat there, seriously." Also not true, but truer at least.
"Hm."
"Mom."
"Hm?" God, she's trying to look innocent. Hard to do with a smirk, but she's trying.
He should say something, tell her to mind her own business, but he's not quite sure what to say. She averts her gaze, but the grin is widening. Time for a Hail Mary. "I have a date tomorrow."
Her painted-on eyebrows raise. "That was… quick."
"There's a girl from my English class, Katie."
Is she disappointed? If she is, it doesn't last long. Makes sense. Probably better to date a fellow college student instead of being the creeper grad.
"Exciting!" She nods to the pages on the desk before him. "Think you can get those done before your class today or should I pack them up and take them home?"
Notes: So... the notes. Mistake? Success? Let me know. Also: Jonas's mom! We meet her! What do you think?
-Turner