A/N: Thanks to those who have reached out and checked up on me. Baby is still snug and well on the inside, but we've had to go to lots of monitoring for high risk stuff which is extra time consuming and stressful, especially when also the primary caregiver for a toddler! Add in some death and illness in my family and well, it's been a rough couple months. ANYWAY, happy holidays to all, and happy almost new year. This story is NOT abandoned, just being written and updated very, very slowly at this point. Finally... this chapter is a little bit short, but yay for smut?
Chapter 20
In my dreams I found myself suddenly back in the lab in Russia. This time, when I fell out of the drop ceiling, the guard immediately called for backup. And when I desperately slashed out at him when he approached, he kicked my hand and my weapon away. He followed it up with a blow to my head that sent me thudding into the wall, then he reached down and pulled me up by my hair, laughing when I began to scream.
I was shocked back to waking in an instant, sputtering and trying to figure out what was going on as the lights in my room came on, and I realized I was being sprayed with… something… from all angles, my room quickly coated in some sort of foam.
The door burst inwards and I looked over to see Steve standing in the doorway, quickly assessing the situation.
"Steph, are you awake?" He asked first, and when I nodded he said, "are you okay?"
I looked down at myself and did a quick mental evaluation.
"I'm embarrassed," I began. "And I don't think I'm wearing a shirt anymore, but these pants that Pepper sent are still intact."
"They are made of a material that adapts to your body's needs almost like a second skin," JARVIS provided through a speaker somewhere that I hadn't realized existed, but I realized that I really should have figured he was everywhere in the Avengers spaces.
"I think it's the same stuff Tony has been using to try to make Bruce pants," Steve said. "So far he can make them expand with Bruce so that the Hulk is covered, but he can't get them to shrink back down."
"Okay," I said slowly. "I don't. I can't even. I don't know what to do with that information right now, so I'm just going to go right past it."
"Are you hurt?" Steve asked, seemingly willing to move on from the issue of clothed vs. naked Hulk as well.
"No," I said slowly. "I'm just a little cold."
Steve nodded his head and turned around, disappearing momentarily from the doorway. When he returned he had a large, ugly blanket that I eyed suspiciously.
"Is that a fire blanket?" I accused.
"Just in case," he teased. Then his expression turned serious as I walked to the doorway and he wrapped the blanket around me. When I reached a hand up from inside to hold the blanket together around me, Steve slid his arm down around my waist.
"Nightmare," I told him.
"Hmmm," Steve said. "I was worried about that earlier, but you seemed to be sleeping so peacefully on the couch that I thought you'd be okay. I hoped that you were too tired to dream tonight."
"You make me feel safe," I offered by way of explanation.
Left unspoken was that at some point after he'd presumably moved me to the guest bedroom for the night, my subconscious had no longer felt safe, and that was when the nightmares struck.
Steve casually walked me down the hallway through his living rooms and down the other hallway to his bedroom. Opening the door, he guided me inside and over to his bathroom. Once there, he opened a door to a spacious shower and turned on the knobs, fiddling with them until the room started to fill with steam. It was in that moment I realized that he was wearing sweatpants loose and low around his hips and nothing over the top.
I kicked myself for not noticing the gorgeous view earlier, but then I decided it was probably reasonable that I had been distracted by almost burning down Avengers Tower and everybody in it.
When he started to pull back from the shower and got ready to turn around, and I could only assume leave the room, I felt a rush takeover me. Dropping my blanket, I stepped forward and pressed my naked chest into his back.
Steve froze, and I whispered, "stay?"
Steve whipped around, eyes searching mine and desperately looking for something.
"Are you sure?" He finally asked. "I don't want our first time to be because you're scared and chasing away nightmares."
"Steve," I urgently pulled his body into mine and insisted, "it's not because of that. I'm not scared. I wasn't scared as soon as I woke up, and the nightmares were gone the moment I saw you. This is… I don't know how to explain it…"
"Please, Steph. Try," he insisted. "I need to know."
"I wanted you before I was kidnapped, but I was afraid to admit it. All that the past couple days did was give me the opportunity to see it clearly. See you clearly. See us clearly. I know what I want, Steve, and that's you. And if you hadn't lulled me to sleep with your snuggliness on that couch, we'd have already done this," I gestured between the two of us.
Steve laughed and said, "lulled you to sleep? I did no such thing!"
"Yes you did!" I insisted. "With the whole being warm and comfortable and…" I finished with just a dreamy sigh.
Steve's grin grew positively sinful and his arms banded around me confidently. Still his tone started out light as he teased, "you're one to talk about being warm." Then he moved his hands lower to get underneath my ass and pull me up his body for a deep kiss.
When he pulled back, all joking was gone and his voice was pitched lower as he turned and shoved me up against the wall on the outside of the shower and said, "I'm going to strip you out of the rest of those clothes. Then I'm going to scrub whatever this crap is off your body," his lips drifted back to my ear but close that I could feel his breath on my skin as he continued. "Then I'm going to show you how beautiful you are. And when I'm done, if you still want to, I'm going to carry you out to my bed and I'm going to make love to you so thoroughly that you won't be able to think of anything other than me an' you."
"S-Steve," I breathed out. "Please!"
He took that for the enthusiastic consent it was, and his lips pressed urgently to mine. He set me down just long enough to pull off my pants. Somehow he managed to lift me out of the tangle of clothing at my feet at the same time he shoved his own to the floor, and seconds later he had us both in the shower.
Water rushed down on us from above like rain, and I was pretty sure it mixed with the foam to make me exceptionally slippery, but Steve held me firmly and securely in his arms never once giving me reason to think he might drop me.
We finally broke apart and Steve took a step back, eyes drifting down my body and drinking the sight of it in, much as I knew mine were doing to his body.
He reached out an arm, and I looked over almost missing the fact that the lower of two built in shelves was filled with all my preferred brands of toiletries. I had barely processed that info when he came at me with shampoo, massaging it into my head so perfectly that my neck went limp and my head dropped back as I groaned.
Steve stopped long enough to quickly spread some of the suds along my neck and shoulders to clean them off. Then his hands went back to my hair and he took a couple of steps into me until I retreated into the wall behind me. When my head sank back this time, I rested the top of it against the wall while his hands cupped the rest, resuming the massage as his lips took mine in a wild kiss before slid down to wreak havoc on my neck.
I felt my body revving up with arousal like I'd never experienced before, and he hadn't even gone below the collar.
Not that I had a collar at that moment.
When his mouth let up, he steered me again, moving me then slowly tipping my head back to rinse out my hair thoroughly.
I heard myself whimper when I opened my eyes and saw him dumping body wash on a loofah then prowl toward me.
Without prompting, I moved out from under the water for the moment.
As soon as the loofah touched me, I shrieked with confused delight. Previously the coarseness of the sponge wasn't really something I paid heed to beyond having the impression that it made me feel softer and more polished than a bar of soap or a washcloth.
But as turned on as Steve already had me, the loofah ratcheted up the sensations in my body, and made my skin practically hum with anticipation.
Oh great. I would probably accidentally give myself an orgasm every time I tried to use a loofah after this.
Steve moved slowly, allowing water to wash over my skin when he finished each section of my body. Then his hands would move onto a new area, and his mouth would explore the cleaned region.
He alternated seemingly randomly between licks, nibbles, kisses, teeth scrapes, and sucking with his mouth on my skin— the whole time maintaining an unhurried pace.
The sensations pushed me higher and higher, but they never pushed me all the way to the brink. When he finally finished cleaning and worshipping my body, he watched for a moment as water ran down my body.
Then without warning, he dropped from the crouch he was in to his knees and lifted one leg up to over his shoulder before repeating with the other. His face dove in at the same time as he stood up and I keened loudly then arched my back and dug my hands into his hair. It only took a couple broad strokes of his tongue along my slit and up to my clit before my orgasm exploded.
Steve eased me back to myself with gentle kisses then carefully lowered me back down so my feet touched the ground. Once they did, however, he leaned his weight into me to support me and make sure I stayed upright even as he reached across for a bottle from the shelf. Moments later his mouth was on mine and his hands were in my hair once more.
Dimly I realized that he was massaging conditioner slowly and thoroughly into my hair. And by the time he was done and I'd gotten a final rinse, all I could focus on was how badly I needed Steve.
We'd already discussed safe sex and the fact that I had an IUD and Steve was incapable of carrying disease, so I drew Steve into me and said, "Steve, I need."
"What do you need?" He pushed. "Tell me."
"I need you inside me," I blurted out, never one to actually feel all that comfortable talking during sex. "Right now. I don't want the bed, I don't want anything other than you inside me right nooooowwww."
I ended in a howl as Steve took me at my word, lifting me again and pressing inside with one firm, steady drive.
He opened his mouth, presumably to ask if I was okay, but I cut him off urging, "move!"
To start he was simply rolling his hips forward and back, not moving in and out of me all that much as I adjusted to his size— and he was seriously the biggest man I'd been with. As my body relaxed, his movements got bigger and he dropped his mouth. His tongue licked into my mouth to tangle with mine then soon took up a similar rhythm to the rest of him as he thrust in and out.
I could tell he was holding back some, so when I ripped my mouth away to catch my breath, I panted out a desperate, "MORE."
When he pulled all the way out of me, I whined in protest. Instead of responding, he simply used his his hands to turn my hips so I spun around.
I braced my arms and arched my back to give him a better angle as he bent his knees to line up with me and thrust back in.
"Yes, Steve," I groaned out at the new angle. His thrusts were still short— a concession to the wet shower environment and not wanting us to slip— but the angle felt deeper and much more intense.
After several minutes, his mouth started teasing my right ear as he started whispering encouragements to me.
"Come on, Steph. You feel so good. Get there again, Sweetheart. I want to feel you all around me, squeezing me."
Just the thought of orgasming on his cock brought me most of the way there. I shifted my left arm across the wall in front of me and dropped my head forward a little more to rest on it, groaning again as this changed the angle just enough to have him pushing on my g-spot each inward stroke instead of just next to it as he had been before.
My right arm now free, I snaked my hand down to start rubbing circles on my clit. Instantly I started clenching up, chasing my release, and made Steve groan with animalistic satisfaction. His right hand slid from my hip to around my thigh to hoist my leg up and give my hand a little more space to maneuver.
From there it was just a few powerful thrusts of his hips into mine and a couple circles of my hand before I went flying over the cliff once more. Once the roaring in my head had cleared and I could think once more, I could feel Steve softening in me as the last few aftershocks ripples through.
"Wow," I moaned.
"Sorry, I'm not usually so fast," Steve rumbled into my ear, sounding regretful for some reason.
"Are you… apologizing?" I asked incredulously. "You have nothing to be sorry for. That was the best I've ever had, and if it weren't for your hands basically holding me up right now, I'd be a spineless pile of goo on the ground."
Steve pulled out of me with a satisfied noise then managed to twist me around so that he was holding me up facing him once more. He grabbed a washcloth from I didn't know where and made short work of cleaning us both up while he grinned at me.
"For the record, that was the best for me too," he informed me, dropping the cloth and shifting his grip as I allowed myself to relax into him all the way.
Somehow he got us out of the shower and dry enough to collapse onto the bed still holding me tight in his arms. He reached down to snag the comforter with one hand and pulled it up and over us both. I burrowed into him with a happy noise of agreement and felt myself drift back into a now peaceful sleep.