He overestimated himself when he told her he could handle her neediness.

He had built himself up so much preparing to make the trip from Los Angeles back to Sunnydale, he needed to be there for her, he needed to be strong for her, to do anything she needed from him. He knew she would be emotional and his presence would only push that further but at the end of the day... it was the two of them.

She was beating herself up for not being there to find her mother earlier and he couldn't take that pain away. She was heartbroken over her mother no longer being on this planet with her, scared about being alone in this world without her, having to go from big sister to nearly being mom to Dawn without any warning... And all he wanted was to make it better.

He wanted to bring Joyce back, he wanted to tell her everything would be okay, he wanted to be able to tell her that he knew without any uncertainty that it wouldn't have mattered if she had been there or not... that it was just part of fate that they didn't get to understand and it would have played out the same way no matter what.

When she'd asked him to stay forever... he thought she'd just ripped his heart right out of his chest. That was all he wanted her to say, and yet... they both knew it couldn't happen that way. He'd broken her heart, his own in the process, and had left Sunnydale for a reason. A reason he hated, but one that stood in the way of her getting everything he felt she deserved. But he couldn't tell her no right now either.

He was grateful she brushed it off but she still the pain lingered.

And she looked so broken. So small, so broken... so much like she just needed him to make it all go away as their eyes met.

He knew he couldn't really make what she was going through any easier but he hoped he could give her at least something she needed from him, a tiny break from the endless hurt she was living in right now. He steeled himself the best he could as he closed his eyes, feeling her lips press against his. If his heart still worked as a human's did he was sure it would have stopped right then.

Buffy was just as he remembered... nothing short of heaven. She was soft, smelled like vanilla and honey. He could taste the tears that had shed throughout the day and had crossed her lips, could feel how much she wanted him, too. He knew he'd give up anything in this world if he could for her, to go back to being with her. He missed this.

Buffy poured everything she had been through since he'd left into him, begging him silently to remember how they were, to come back to her. He let his own emotions run wild, feeling his body responding quickly to her touch, to simply being near her again. She got under his skin like no one else ever had or ever could.

He was sure if she hadn't broken the kiss as her hand brushed against his growing erection so much more would have happened out here. All logic and sense were quickly floating away and all he wanted was to feel her, to feel something, to heal her, distract her even for a short time from the loss.

Buffy tried apologizing in her own way by saying again she tried to warn him and he cursed at himself for making her feel as though she'd done something wrong. He was supposed to be being the strong one here and was failing horribly.

"I'm sorry," he breathed out and tried to quickly gather his thoughts to give a big speech but she quickly cut him off by giving him thanks for coming.

There was no way in hell he wasn't going to be here for her tonight. As soon as he'd gotten the news he'd wanted to rush to her but he'd waited until tonight. He felt she'd need him most once the funeral was over and everything was "real" after that.

He'd cuddled close to her by that large tree until the last possible second. He'd just let her lay there, taking him in. No other words needed to be said tonight.

THE END.