A/N: Soooo I completely forgot I was posting this here. I am so sorry. RIP

"You've got to tell her."

"I know."

"You've got to tell her soon."

"I know."

In Krel's defence, he wants to tell Aja he's alive. He just doesn't know how. He feels like just walking up to her and turning the transduction off would be kind of tactless. And right now, with two of his friends in the med-wing, with Steve… still on Earth, with the threat of Merlin looming, he just doesn't know if it's a good time. What if he tells her, and then just – goes and gets himself killed the next time they face Merlin? That would be so much worse for Aja. He doesn't want that for her. It feels like a terrifyingly real possibility, that he could die, that they could all die. That Merlin could win. Krel tries to push the thought out of his head, but it lingers sourly anyway.

"Look, Krel, you can't just not tell her you're alive," says Seamus. He tries to cross his arms, but by his wince this fails spectacularly so he settles for resting his uninjured arm on top of the sling. They're both trying to be quiet, because Toby's sleeping, but Toby can also sleep through anything, so it's not too much of a worry. "She's your sister."

"I know, Seamus," Krel says for what feels like the hundredth time. "I just don't know if now is – the right time."

"When will be?" Seamus says. Then he gestures at Krel with his good hand. "Besides, you can't fight Merlin looking like… this."

"Why not?"

"You're bad enough at fighting in your Akiridion form," Seamus points out.

"Thanks," Krel says flatly.

"And this isn't even your normal human form," Seamus continues, as if Krel hadn't spoken. "You're not really used to it. Makes you an easier target."

Okay. Seamus does have a point. He's really not the best fighter, and he'd noticed it was much harder to fight in an unfamiliar body. He'd stayed in the air as much as he could, because manoeuvring off the ground had much less differences between forms.

"How much does Aja know about what happened?" Krel asks carefully.

"If you're asking about Gaylen's core, we didn't tell her that," says Seamus. "But you should probably mention it. That's an important detail."

"She's going to kill me."

"Nah, she'll be too happy you're alive." Seamus adjusts his sling. It's kind of dumb for him to talk about not being able to fight when he was just stabbed. Personally, Krel thinks Seamus definitely shouldn't join in the fight next time, and neither should Toby, but he knows neither of them will listen to him or the doctors. "Look. She's your sister. She misses you. She's not going to be mad at you – well, maybe a little, because she was pissed at us for not telling her. But she'll be thrilled you're alive."

"I guess," says Krel. "Just – how do I tell her? What do I say?"

"I don't think you'll have to say much," says Seamus. He gives Krel a fond smile. "Dude, just go hug your sister already."

Krel sighs. "Alright, alright, I'll go. But if she kills me, don't say I didn't warn you."

"I'd say I'd come to your funeral, but I've already done that, so…"

Krel maturely sticks his tongue out at his friend – Toby taught him that one – and leaves the room. He pauses outside the med-wing and takes a deep breath, before going to search for Aja. He migrates, instinctively, towards the star-deck. He knows his sister well, and – sure enough – he finds Aja sitting inside, knees pulled to her chest and staring up at the constellations. He hesitates again in the doorway, his last chance to back out, but forces himself to walk in. She glances back at his footsteps. He freezes.

"Seamus's brother, right?" she says. "I didn't get your name."

Krel opens his mouth to reply, and he nearly lies and makes up a name on the spot, but Seamus is right. She deserves to know. He swallows and lets out a shaky breath, then pulls out his serrator to turn off the transduction.

"Actually, I'm not Seamus's brother," he says, as the transduction flashes away. Aja sucks in a sharp gasp. He manages a weak smile. "Hi, Aja."

She stands, two hands going to cover her mouth and eyes welling with tears. She shakes her head and takes a half-step back. "Impossible. You're – you're dead. I saw your core. I – held your core."

"A fake," Krel says, as if that could possibly make up for all the pain she must have gone through. She continues staring at him, tears slipping down her cheeks as she takes in his form. He suddenly feels self-conscious about his injuries. He wishes he'd borrowed a shirt from someone or something like that, something to hide the burns marring so much of his skin. "Aja, I'm sorry–"

She cuts him off with a wordless cry and launches forward to hug him. Krel rests his hands on her back as she shakes with relieved sobs, closing his eyes and realising how much he's missed his sister and her support. He can't imagine – doesn't want to imagine what she must have felt like. He would have been absolutely shattered in her place. Losing Aja would be – unthinkably awful.

She finally pulls away and wipes her eyes. As she examines his face she looks like she might start crying all over again, but instead her expression shifts into a sharp glare. Ah. Here comes the anger he was expecting. And Seamus thought she'd be too relieved to be mad. Aja is good at being mad with other emotions at the same time. She calls it multi-tasking.

"Don't ever do that again!" she exclaims. She punches his shoulder – thankfully his unburned one. "I thought you were dead! I thought – I thought I lost you, Krel!"

"I know," he says. "I'm sorry. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, but I figured out about Merlin and had to go tell the others and then the fight and–"

"I understand," she says softly. She wipes her eyes. "You're here now. Thank Seklos."

Krel almost corrects her, but while he knows he needs to explain the Gaylen thing, he's not sure that's the way to do it. He needs to be careful how he says it. Aja's going to be mad either way. Well. Madder.

"What happened?" she asks. He almost launches into a full explanation of the Knight situation, only to realise that the others probably already told her about that. She probably wants to know where he'd been when everyone thought he was dead, why he hadn't been there to prove them wrong.

"I was captured," he says. "By the Knights. They were going to bring me to Merlin – the evil wizard, the one you saw. I guess they made a fake or something and left it there. It – must have been a very good one."

"You escaped," she says.

"Yeah," he confirms. "I – don't completely know how, but I did. And then some nice trolls found me and helped treat my injuries."

She raises a hand as if to touch his face, but stops short of the burns. "The Knights did this to you."

"The fire," he says. "But I guess that was the Knights' fault. I'm okay, Aja."

"You should have told me about the Knights," Aja says, voice hardening.

Krel looks away. "You were busy. And we had it handled. I thought."

"Had it handled?" Aja repeats incredulously. "I hear barely anything from you for parsons, and then the next time you come to Akiridion-5 you're unconscious! And then you leave, and not even a delson later, you're–"

Her words catch. She blinks back tears and narrows her eyes.

"Don't tell me you had it handled," she says.

"I thought we did," he says helplessly. "I wanted you to think we did. I – you've always protected me. I guess I just wanted to prove I could take care of myself. I guess I did a pretty bad job at that."

Aja softens, somewhat. "I know you can take care of yourself."

"Do you, though?" he challenges. "If I had told you about the Knights right away, would you have let us at least try to handle it? Or would you have come running back to Earth?"

"I would have come to Earth," she admits. "But of course I would have! You're my little brother, I'm supposed to – oh."

Krel smiles wryly. That's what he thought. "Yeah. Oh."

"It's not that I don't think you can handle it," she says.

"But it's part of it," Krel says. "You don't have to lie to me, Aja. I know you don't think I can protect myself. And I think I've only proven that."

She's silent for a moment. He looks away again, up at the constellations, eyes landing hesitantly on the Runaway, closest in the fake sky above him. It's almost ironic. Aja lays a hand on his shoulder. "You're still here."

He glances at her. "Yeah."

"Despite everything, you're still here," Aja repeats. She gently traces her fingers over the edge of the burns, careful not to hurt him, eyes sad. "I think that proves something. You're stronger than you – than I thought. And I'm proud of you."

Krel smiles again, this time genuine as he meets his sister's eyes. "Yeah. I guess you're right."

She pulls him into another hug, this time shorter but still just as heartfelt. Krel's missed his sister, more than he'd ever admit to her, even if she is a bit over-protective and definitely angry at him right now. It's good to have her in the know again. He didn't like keeping secrets from her.

"I'm so glad you're alive," she murmurs. "I love you, little brother."

"I love you too," he says.

"And if you ever die on me again, I will find a way to bring you back," she threatens, pulling back and crossing all four arms.

He rolls his eyes. He's heard this before. "I know, I know, so you can kill me yourself."

"What? No!" she exclaims. "Why would I do that?"

"That's what Steve keeps saying."

"Steve's threatening to kill you!?"

"No! It's a figure of speech!"

Aja's face falls and she wraps her arms around herself. "Steve told me the evil wizard wanted him dead."

Krel flinches. "Yeah."

"I broke up with him," she says, fingers digging into her upper arms. She blinks rapidly. "I thought – you were dead and – and - the last thing I ever said to him was – I – I told him to leave. And now he's still on Earth with the wizard that wants him dead. So that means…"

Krel glances back up at the constellations. The Martyr twinkles mockingly above him. Krel forces himself to look away from it. This is his fault. Steve pushed him out of the way, saved him, and now Steve is – is–

"I should have saved him," says Krel. He could have, too. If he'd just broken free of Barbara and the troll – whose name he still didn't know – and let his powers loose, he could have saved Steve. Surely he could have saved Steve.

"How could you have?" says Aja. "No one stood a chance against that wizard."

"If I just knew how my powers–" he stops himself, eyes widening, and he presses his lips closed and stares at Aja as her brow furrows. Kleb.

"Powers…?" she repeats slowly.

"Aja, I–"

He's saved from explaining right away. The door to the star-deck opens, and loud footsteps sound as Varvatos storms in, followed rapidly by Zadra. Zadra begins speaking before even surveying the room. "Your majesty, I believe the humans and trolls would like to discuss – Krel?"

"Krel!" shouts Varvatos, running forward and picking Krel up in a hug. Krel grins as he's lifted off his feet by the bigger Akiridion. "You're alive! Don't ever scare Varvatos like that again! Not that Varvatos was scared, mind you."

"Great Gaylen's core," breathes Zadra. Varvatos puts him down, and she cups a hand to the unburned side of his face. "Is it really you?"

Krel laughs uneasily. "In more ways than one."

"What does that mean?" Aja asks. She spins him around to face her. "No more secrets, Krel."

Krel winces, but he nods and looks between his sister and Varvatos and Zadra.

"Remember how we thought we destroyed Gaylen's core with Morando?" he says.

Aja's frown deepens. "Yes. I do."

"Well, we didn't," says Krel. "I found it in the woods, and I – brought it home to study."

"What?" Aja breathes.

"That was highly irresponsible," Zadra says. Apparently she's already over the fact he's alive and back to disapproving his life choices. "Why did you not bring it here?"

"I thought it could be useful," says Krel. Maybe it was irresponsible, but they needed all the help they could get with the Knights, and something had drawn him to it. In retrospect, everything, the dreams, the connection, it all makes sense knowing he's Gaylen's heir. Too much sense. He almost wonders how much of bringing it home had been scientific curiosity and how much had been the connection he had to it. "But we couldn't figure anything out, every test we simulated exploded, but things also kept getting worse with the Knights, so I – I didn't think there was any other choice. I don't think there was any other choice."

Unconsciously, he brings a hand to cover his core; he's still not quite used to its energy yet, to the buzz of it that's almost like it used to be but different all the same. Aja's eyes follow the motion, and a few moments later she sucks in a rough breath.

"You didn't," she says.

"I… did," he admits.

"Even more irresponsible!" Varvatos roars. Great. All of them are angry at him. He kind of expected that. "You saw what that did to Morando! You could have–"

"But I didn't! And I wouldn't have!" Krel cuts in. "Gaylen's core is my burden to bear, and it always has been, whether any of us knew it or not."

"House Tarron's burden," Aja corrects harshly. "And a dangerous one."

"No," says Krel. "My burden. I am Gaylen's heir. Not you. I'm the one who's always been stuck with this – this destiny that I didn't know about and I don't want, just like you have to be queen."

"What do you mean, Gaylen's heir?" demands Zadra.

"I mean – I spoke to Gaylen and that's what he told me." Krel shrugs, half-heartedly, arms wrapping around his torso. His still-healing burns throb. "And I think Mama and Papa knew, too. I just wish they had told me. But this was my destiny. It's not something any of you could have protected me from or stopped me from doing. It was the only choice."

Zadra looks like she wants to say something else, maybe scold him more, maybe argue more, but instead she huffs and throws her hands down. Varvatos shakes his head. "Integrating with Gaylen's core was far too risky."

"It's already done," Krel bites out. "It's been done for a while now. I made my choice, and I'm living with it."

"Is that why they brought you here?" Aja asks quietly. She isn't looking at him, which can't be a good sign. "Is that why you were doing all that – that research? And why the doctors thought there was something wrong with your core?"

Krel curls his arms tighter around himself. "Yeah."

She turns to him, searching his eyes. Something in her expression changes. Maybe she's noticed the white that his friends say is there now. Maybe she's realised that he's – not the same anymore. She looks sad and scared at the same time. He's not used to this much vulnerability from his sister.

"Why didn't you tell me then?"

"I wanted to," he says. "But then you'd ask why I felt the need to – do it – and then I would have had to tell you about the wizard stuff. And I didn't want to tell you about that."

She doesn't audibly respond to that, but the look on her face says it all. Part of Krel – most of Krel regrets not telling her sooner. Maybe things wouldn't have gone so badly with Aja there. Maybe he really couldn't handle it. He should have known better than to try.

"What were you saying when you came in?" Aja asks Zadra. The sudden change of subject is not lost on Krel. He tries to pretend it doesn't sting. He hurt her, too, by not telling her. By not trusting her to trust him.

"The humans and trolls have gathered to start planning," says Zadra. "We are needed."

"Then let's go," she says, pulling herself into a regal stance. She looks like Mama, so much like Mama that Krel's core hurts. "We have a wizard to stop."

The others have all gathered in Mort's med-wing room. It's a tight fit for all of them, but the doctors won't let a grumbling Mort leave the bed yet so it's really their only option. Seamus and Toby both look pleased to see Krel walk in looking like himself again. They look less pleased at Aja's expression. Krel sits beside Seamus – he takes it as a small comfort that Aja still willingly sits beside him. At least she's not so angry that she would start avoiding him. She's only done that once, keltons ago, and in retrospect the situation seems childish and petty compared to everything that's happened recently, compared to Gaylen's core and the Knights and all the reasons Aja has to be upset now.

"She looks mad," Seamus mumbles to him, careful not to let Aja hear.

"Gaylen's core," Krel mutters back.

Seamus grimaces. "Ah. Yep, that'd do it."

"Thank you for coming, your majesty," Mort greets Aja. His voice is rough, probably because he's been unconscious until just recently. Krel hates to see him looking so vulnerable in the med-wing bed, wrapped in bandages across his torso, hair out of its usual pony-tail. Douxie sits closest to him, fiddling with the sleeve of his hoodie, Archie perched on his lap and looking just as worried as his wizard.

"Earth was a refuge for us," says Aja. "We won't let it get destroyed now."

Mort inclines his head, then waves his uninjured arm – the other one in a sling like Seamus's – to create a glowing, magical hologram of Arcadia. Krel could have done that with tech. Actually, maybe he should have done that with tech. He's not sure Mort should be using magic in the state he's in, still healing from far too many injuries. He knows the doctors say he should be – healed enough – by tomorrow, but he also knows Douxie has been arguing with his uncle about fighting. Krel is on Douxie's side that Mort should sit it out, injured like this, but he also knows that without Mort they really don't stand a chance.

"Merlin has the citizens of Arcadia frozen," Mort says. "We have to assume he doesn't want to harm them. This simplifies our job. Our objectives are to stop Merlin from getting the formstone and save our brainwashed friends. Saving the formstone must take precedence."

Krel shoots out of his seat. "What? No. Saving our friends takes precedence!"

"Sit down, Krel," says Ikram. "The fate of the world has to come first. You know that."

"So, what?" Krel snaps. "We leave Jim and the trolls under Merlin's control? We leave Steve to die?"

Toby flinches. Nimue shakes her head. "Krel, I – I don't think we'll be able to save Steve."

"We're going to save Steve," Krel says forcefully. "We're going to save all of them."

Seamus tugs his lower arm to get him to sit back down. "Mort's right, Krel. We can't put their lives over the world. They'd never forgive us."

Krel sits. He sees Seamus's point, but he can't stand the thought that they might not be able to save their friends. Especially Steve, the brother he never expected to have, who'd saved him and gotten captured because of it. But he knows that in Steve's place he wouldn't want them to give up the world to save him.

"Krel," says Mort. "We need to know where the formstone is. And then we need to ensure that none of us get captured so we can't give it away… under duress."

Toby laughs uneasily. "Torture. You mean torture, don't you?"

"Yes," Mort agrees. "I mean torture."

Krel glances around the room and sighs. "Zoom in on the bridge."

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," says Toby.

"It's here," says Krel, standing and walking to the spot. He can almost feel the warm tug of the formstone back on Earth, oh-so-familiar and warm. "We were almost right on top of it when we faced Merlin."

"Don't you just love the irony," mutters Seamus.

"Okay," says Mort. "So we'll need Krel and a squad to protect the formstone at all costs."

Seamus raises a hand, as if they're still in school. Mort stares at him in what seems to be utter disbelief for a few moments.

"Seamus, this isn't class," he says. "You don't need to raise your hand."

"Uh, right," says Seamus, freckled face colouring red. "Okay, question. If Krel's, like, the only one who can get to the formstone, don't we want him as far away from it as possible?"

"Yeah," says Claire. "That's like putting the key right next to the lock."

"Krel's also one of our heaviest hitters if it comes to a fight," says Mort. He pauses. "I – presume you've told your sister."

"He has," says Aja shortly.

Mort nods. "Excellent. If it comes down to it, we need the firepower there."

"Um, I also have a question, or maybe a counter-point," says Krel, because Mort's very much implying that Krel would stand half a chance in a fight against Merlin and he definitely would not. "I still have no idea how to use my powers."

"Strong emotion, you said," Seamus points out. "Just get really angry. Hulk out on us, bro."

"What?"

"Dude, I have so many movies I have to show you," Seamus says, shaking his head in disappointment.

"While Krel and his squad guard the formstone, the rest of us will need to fan out and find Merlin," Mort cuts back in. "Try to minimise casualties, but keeping the formstone out of Merlin's hands is our priority."

"Okay, but how are we going to stop Merlin?" Eli asks. "I don't think any of us stand a chance against him. I mean, Mort, aren't you like a super powerful wizard and you still ended up in the hospital."

"We'll manage," says Mort.

"Has anyone ever stood a chance against this… Merlin?" Aja crosses her upper arms. "Does he have any weaknesses?"

"Well…" says Toby, drawing out the word like he doesn't want to continue his idea. He does anyway. "There is one person."

Claire frowns. Blinky and Aaarrrgghh!!! exchange wary looks. Mort scowls instantly.

"Oh, no," he says. "No, absolutely not, we are not getting her help."

"Come on, man, she's your aunt!" Toby insists. "If anyone can talk her into helping us and not causing the Eternal Night, it's you!"

"No, no, no, my aunt and I have not been on speaking terms since long before she was trapped in the Heartstone," says Mort. "I say good riddance to her. I do not want her back."

"We don't like Morgana any more than you do," says Claire. "But if she can help us stop Merlin…"

Mort huffs and throws up his good arm. "Fine! Your funerals! But don't say I didn't warn you."

"Alright!" says Toby. "Krel! How do you feel about opening a portal to another realm?"

All eyes fall on him. Krel gives them a wide-eyed stare.

"What?" he says. "You guys are looking at me like you expect me to be able to break all laws of space, time, and physics!"

They continue staring back at him. He thinks about his statement for a moment, and ninety percent of the things he's done in the past couple of months.

"Just give me a few hours," he says.

"At least we've got the start of a plan this time," says Nimue. "We'll leave as soon as we're ready."

Krel tells himself that means soon. They can't wait – not with the entire Earth at stake. Not with Steve's life actively in danger every second they wait. He curls his fists on his legs and nods.

"Soon," he says.

He spends the rest of the day working with Claire and Mort to try to figure out the portal to what they call the Shadow Realm. He doesn't exactly know what that means, only that he's going to need to find some way to combine science and magic to do it. Claire casually tells them about the time she got possessed by this Morgana. Neither this story nor Mort's expression make Krel feel at all confident in bringing Morgana in as an ally.

He can't sleep that night. He sits in his room tinkering with the device they're building, trying to make sure it will work. He's too anxious to sleep. Someone will probably yell at him for it tomorrow, but he can't bring himself to care. He's not going to fall asleep anyway. He might as well do something useful.

There's a light knock on his door.

"Come in," he calls. Toby peeks his head in, then walks over to sit beside Krel on his bed. Krel raises an eyebrow and gestures to the bandages around his friend's torso. "Shouldn't you be resting?"

"Can't sleep," says Toby. "Figured you'd be in the same boat."

"We're not in a boat," Krel says. They both know he knows it's just an expression, but it's nice to watch his friend's lips twitch upward anyway.

"This is it," Toby says. "Tomorrow's the big day."

"This is it," Krel agrees. "Win or lose, this is it."

"We're going to win." Toby shifts into a more comfortable position. "We have to win."

Krel leans back on his upper arms, pulling the device closer to himself with his lower ones. "At what cost, though? I – if it comes down to the formstone or one of you – one of my friends – I don't think I can make that choice."

"I get it, man," says Toby. "I don't know. Hopefully it won't come to that."

"I can't lose you guys," Krel says. To his alarm, he feels tears gathering in his eyes. He tries to blink them back, but instead they spill over and he angrily wipes them away. "I've never had so many people to care about, and now I could lose all of you."

"We're going to get through this." Toby hugs him. Krel is distressed to find he can't stop crying, not now that he's started. He hates that he has tears to cry now, when he didn't just a few months ago, but in a way it does make him feel – almost human. More a part of his new home. He hugs his friend back and tries to regain some semblance of control over his emotions. After a few minutes, it works, enough that he can breathe without more tears, at least.

"Steve's dead, isn't he?" he asks quietly. Toby's grip tightens. "He saved me. And Merlin's killed him by now."

"It's not your fault," says Toby. Krel doesn't miss the way he doesn't contradict him. The tears come anew. It's not fair. It's not fair that after everything they've been through, they'd lose Steve like this, that it would be Krel's fault, even though he knows Steve wouldn't want him to blame himself. Krel desperately wants to believe he's still alive, that Merlin's keeping him alive for some reason. Krel can't think of a reason, but maybe that's because he's not an evil wizard. Surely there's a reason, and then they'll rescue Steve and save the day and everything will be okay. He's having a hard time convincing himself.

"I wish – I wish things were different," Krel manages. "I wish I could do something. Mort wants me to be a 'heavy-hitter' and I don't think I'll be able to, and everyone wants me to be able to put the world first and I just – my friends. I've never had friends. I can't lose you – more of you."

"I – can't promise everyone's going to be okay," Toby admits. That's kind of the last thing Krel wanted to hear, but he's grateful for his friend's honesty nonetheless. "I can't even promise we'll win. I'm as worried as you are. But we've got to do our best anyway. We can't let our fear stop us from giving our all. We'll never stop Merlin if we do."

"What am I supposed to do if you – if any of you–" Krel can't bring himself to say it. He chokes on a sob. "I can't do this, Toby."

"Yes, you can." Toby pulls away and rests his hands on Krel's shoulders. His friend looks more serious than Krel's ever seen him, the blue light of Krel's room turning his green eyes teal and highlighting the scarring cut on his face. "I know you can. I know we can. And if someone – doesn't make it – then you keep going, and you use it to fuel you, and you do your best, because that's all you can do."

"I'm scared," Krel admits in a small voice.

"We all are," says Toby. "But we're going to be okay. Somehow."

Krel swallows back more tears and nods. "Okay."

"You should get some sleep," says Toby. "Tomorrow is going to be a long day."

"You should too," he says. Then, hesitantly, he adds, "Stay?"

Toby smiles sadly at him. "You couldn't make me leave if you tried."