.

Ok, this is just a bonus chapter...for NO REASON WHATSOEVER.

Just because I wanted to!

.

Chapter 16

~X~

Sier had thought about this moment most of the day, but still she felt unprepared for the wave of intimacy that seemed to come with Fili's words. Home…wife. Yes, this was her home now, where she would be sharing her life with her family…a family that consisted of three. She was not afraid, not in the true sense of the word, but nervous, unsure and certainly not ready to play the role of a wife and princess. Yet what had Dis said? We choose to accept and then train to fulfill the position. Sier was not afraid of hard work, and she was willing to put in the time and effort it would require to become what was needed. After all, she had known nothing about being a mother until the moment it was thrust upon her, and she never regretted that for a second. This would simply be another part she would have to play, an assignment she would need to step up to. And she was determined to do so in a way that would make Fili proud, refusing to do anything that might embarrass him or make him feel uncomfortable in the process.

Thankfully, Flinn was far too excited about his new home to remain silent, and soon he was dragging Fili and her around by the hand as they inspected every nook and cranny of the apartment. The kitchen especially excited Sier, looking forward to baking and cooking meals for her family in the cozy little room. Flinn had squealed with joy when he saw his own room, bouncing up and down on the bed a few times, before he ran around to investigate everything he saw. Sier couldn't help but smile as she caught Fili's look of pride over his son's approval of his room.

"It's all mine?" he asked, zooming to the other side of the room once more to look inside his wardrobe.

"All yours," Fili nodded. "Though once you are settled, we will need to see about getting you more clothes and perhaps a few toys as well. And I made sure to find a large enough bed so that you can grow into it without having to switch out for many years to come."

"But…where will you and Ama sleep?" Flinn asked, turning around in a circle as if searching for another bed.

"In our own room, of course," Fili answered, looking down at the confused face of his son. "This room is yours…your ama and I will have our own."

"Oh," he muttered, looking at his big bed for a moment and then back at his parents with a worried expression. "But…but what if Ama gets lonely or scared? She…she's never had to sleep without me."

Fili turned and gave Sier a sympathetic look, knowing that it was not truly his mother that Flinn was worried about…but himself. It had not occurred to him that his son might not be ready to branch out and occupy a room of his own just yet. Still, now was as good a time as any to try.

"Flinn," Fili began, bending down so that he could look the lad in the eye. "Our room is just across the way, and though it is now my job to make sure you and your Amad do not get scared or lonely, no one will think badly if she needs to come snuggle with you once in a while. Although," he added, acting as if the idea had just occurred to him, "…the bed in our room is quite a bit larger, so maybe it would be best if you came in and kept her company there…yes?"

"You…you think so? Just to make sure she won't cry or anything?" Flinn asked hopefully.

"I think it is a perfect idea," Fili grinned. "Especially since I never want to see your mother sad…or you for that matter. However, how about we start out seeing if your ama can try and sleep without you tonight. It might be a really fun adventure to try something new, don't you think? And I know that you are very brave and love adventures, right?"

"I…I am brave…sometimes," Flinn admitted, sticking out his chin as he tried to appear strong. "I could try it…but if Ama gets scared, I will have to come and protect her."

"Of course you will," the dwarrow prince nodded solemnly. "Now, come and let me show you where our room is so you can find it easily if you need to…I mean if she needs you to." And taking Flinn by the hand he led him out of his room and towards the other door not far away.

Sier followed, but she could not get over how kind and understanding Fili was being. He had worked very hard to provide Flinn with a room that any little dwarrow would be proud of, yet he was still willing to let him come sleep with them if he got scared. Having to share a home with Omer, Maywen and their children, had only afforded them the one room to share. And while it had never occurred to her before, she now realized that Flinn had never had to sleep alone in all his young life.

"See, here is our room," Fili announced, pushing open the door to their bedchambers. "Not far away at all, don't you think?"

"Uh-hu," Flinn nodded, looking at the room and then back across the way to his own door, as if measuring the distance in his mind. "And you are right, Adad…your bed is a lot bigger."

Sier, who had been watching her son until this point, looked up at his comment, focusing on the large item in the middle of the room. The Bed. She could not help but wonder if this was the very same bed that…that… No! She would not even think about such things. It did not matter anyway, for she remembered none of it, something she thanked the Vallar for on many occasions…and even more so right now. She felt her cheeks turn pink at the thought of even having to look at Fili and remember what they had done. Knowing it happened was quite enough…she did not need to be constantly reminded of the details.

"So as you can see, there will be plenty of room if your ama needs you," Fili continued. "Now, let's get you ready for bed, and I will tell you a story about how Kili, your uncle Thorin, and I, all rode down a river in wine barrels?"

"You did?" Flinn's interest was instantly piqued, and he seemed to forget all about the worry of sleeping alone in his room. "Was it fun?"

"Well, if we had not been trying to escape from an elf dungeon at the time, it might have been a lot more enjoyable," Fili mused. "However…I suppose it was exciting."

.

.

The next hour was spent getting the little dwarrow into his night clothes, caring for his hygiene, and tucking him into bed. Fili drew out the story with amazing detail, making it last until the lad's eyes were drooping closed and he drifted off to sleep. Sier had sat in a chair by the wall, listening almost as intently as Flinn, for Fili was a very engaging storyteller. She could tell that he had left a great deal out, and having heard some of the tales herself from Thorin and his company on their journey from Himros, she knew that the ride down the river had been anything but lazy. Still, Sier was grateful that Fili had picked a story that would not add to any bad dreams, especially since this would be her baby's first night alone.

As the two slipped out of the room, leaving a lantern burning low for comfort, and keeping the door opened a crack, they exchanged a look of relief over Flinn going down so easily.

"Your barrel story really did the trick," Sier whispered.

Fili chuckled, thinking back to how many times he was sure he would have drowned on that wild rapid ride, dodging rocks and waterfalls, while trying to keep his barrel upright. What that foolish little Hobbit had been thinking was beyond him…though he had to give Bilbo credit, for it did work. As he pulled his mind from the past, Fili noticed that Sier seemed a bit uncomfortable, standing there with her arms wrapped around her middle, looking as if she was not quite sure what to do next. In all truth, neither did he, but someone had to take control of the situation…and he was now the husband.

Husband…the very idea gave him the shivers. Was he ready? Could he fulfill the duties that came with such a title? He knew he wanted to try, both for Flinn and Sier. They were his family now, and he had sworn that he would not let them down.

"Are you hungry?" he asked, desperately thinking of something to say. "Thirsty perhaps?"

"No, I am fine," she assured him, having had more than her fill of both food and drink at the party.

"Well…then, would you prefer to retire?" It was what Fili would have called a loaded question, knowing that on one side it was very innocent, while on the other it could be taken a hundred different ways. Of course she had no reason to worry about the two of them sharing a room, figuring that since they were not a destined pair, there was no chance of him ever accosting her again. Yet in his heart, Fili still feared this with a sickening dread. Not because he found Sier in any way objectionable…quite the contrary. Yet only he knew about the dreams, the visions he was plagued with, and the fear that the one time experience might somehow repeat itself against his will. Oh, if only his mother had allowed Oin to give him more of those herbs…then he would be assured that nothing could possibly happen.

"I…I suppose we should," Sier answered nervously. "It has been a long day, and with the ceremony tomorrow, it would be wise to get our rest."

"Agreed," Fili nodded, taking a few moments to douse the lights and make sure the door was locked tight. Of course there were guards posted in the hallway that led to the royal sleeping chambers, something that had been put in place five years ago, but Fili was not taking any chances. He then pushed open the door to their shared room and waited until Sier moved to step inside. "I had your belongings unpacked and placed in the wardrobe for you," he told her, gesturing towards the large piece of furniture in the corner of the room. "The washroom is through there."

Sier nodded her appreciation, and after gathering her needed things, she disappeared into the adjoining room, leaving Fili all alone in his old room. He had not been back to these quarters in a very long time, having moved in with Kili soon after Sier had disappeared, and he had never once slept in this bed since that fateful night. He just couldn't. Not with the realization of what he had done upon the very mattress that now stared at him accusingly. Yet now…tonight, he would share it once again with the only dwarrowdam he had ever touched in an intimate fashion…and it frightened him to death!

Stripping off his clothes he quickly changed into a light pair of linen pants and nightshirt, neatly hanging up his other items so as not to give Sier the impression that he was as much of a slob as Kili had said. Then, staring at the bed once more, he gave his head a sad shake and quickly settled upon a plan that would hopefully ease both their minds.

.

.

Sier had taken more time than usual to get ready for bed, doing everything with an unhurried slowness that ate up a few extra minutes. But once she had no further excuse, she quietly opened the door and stepped out into the room once more. She had half expected to see Fili in bed already, waiting patiently for her to join him before dousing the lights and going to sleep. Yet what she saw instead, surprised and confused her. There was Fili, standing on the opposite side of the bed, making himself a place to sleep…on the floor!

"What are you doing?" she questioned, stepping forward so that she could get a better look.

"I…I am making my bed here," he said, the sound of his explanation even sounding lame to his own ears.

"But why?" Sier pressed.

"Sier…" Fili began, giving a heavy sigh as he rubbed the back of his neck, desperately searching for a reasonable way to make her understand. "I know that as of two days ago, the idea of being married, especially to me, was completely foreign to you. As you pointed out, we hardly know each other, and simply saying a few vows today did not automatically fix that. I am glad we got married, I am happy to call you my wife, and I would think it is more than obvious how delighted I am to be Flinn's father. But I do not wish to make you feel uncomfortable by pressuring you into such an intimate situation as sharing a bed before you are ready." He knew there was more to it than just that, but the last thing he wanted to do was tell her about his own fears.

"But Fili…this is your bed!" she argued, gesturing to the large, soft looking piece of furniture that stood between them. "If anyone should be sleeping on the floor, it would be me."

"No, I would never allow such a thing!" Fili stated firmly, yet then his shoulders slumped and he looked away. "I swore today that I would look after you in all ways, and until we are more comfortable around each other…I think it best that we not push things too quickly. I will be fine sleeping on the floor, I assure you, after all, I slept under far worse conditions than this on our journey. And this time I get an actual pillow," he added jokingly, holding up the fluffy object in his hand before tossing it on the blankets he had already laid down.

"I…I understand," she nodded. "And I thank you for thinking of my feelings on the matter as well. It shows your fine character…something that I have seen you display many times with Flinn and the others – especially with Dwalin today."

At the mention of his old mentor, Fili's face instantly changed from somber to amused.

"Yes, he did rather shock me there by placing himself in the role as your protector," he laughed, sitting down on the side of the bed. "You know, I honestly believe that if I had not requisitioned the gold right away, like I promised, he would be pounding on our door right now, demanding I either pay up or return you to his care."

"I never expected him to do such a thing," Sier told him as she too sat down on the opposite side of the bed, leaning back against the headboard. "And when he requested so high an amount…I really am sorry for costing you so much."

"Sier…I would have paid three times that, and Dwalin knew it," Fili told her solemnly. "Being able to call you and Flinn my family is worth more to me than all the gold in Erebor." He then got a sly grin on his face as he added, "Besides, one fourteenth of the mountain's treasure is rightfully mine – it says so in the contract we all signed when we joined the quest. But do you honestly think that five hundred gold pieces was a hardship for me…or that Dwalin even bothered to count it before tossing it in with his own wealth?"

"I guess it keeps slipping my mind that you are a prince," she laughed, realizing how the money had meant nothing, it simply having been done to fulfill tradition.

"I am just glad he did not ask for a herd of goats or a couple of cows," Fili said, looking aghast. "Where in Middle Earth would I have managed to find those on such short notice?"

The laughter that followed did much to ease the tension and soon they both felt comfortable enough to retire for the night. Sier on the far side, snuggled under the warm covers, with Fili lying on his back, looking up at the ceiling from the floor. It was dark in the room, save for the small flicker from the slowly dying fireplace, but the silence did little to help Sier sleep. Her mind was still full of thoughts, of questions, and of things she did not dare share with the dwarrow who was now her husband. Maybe in time she would feel at ease in his presence, but for now, she could not help but sense that there was still an amount of unresolved tension between them. And before she could even think of shutting her eyes, at least one thing needed to be addressed.

"Fili…are you asleep?" she whispered out into the silence, not wishing to wake him if he was.

"No," came an almost instantaneous reply, his non-drowsy tone assuring her that he spoke the truth.

"May I ask you something?"

"Of course," he answered. "Anything."

"I was wondering…I mean…do you remember anything from that night?" She was grateful for the darkness, for she was certain her face had turned six shades of red at the question, but she needed to know.

"I…" Fili felt his body tense at her inquiry, not at all sure how to answer that. He had no true memories, but the dreams that had plagued him had been far too real not to contain a small measure of fact. Still, he was hesitant to admit this, not wishing to frighten her. "Do you?" He knew it was a dirty trick to turn the tables on her, but Fili decided if he knew her mind first, it would help him to answer.

"No, nothing. The last thing I remember was Bina and her father entering my room after I had just eaten dinner. Everything grew foggy after that, and the next thing I recall is waking up in the infirmary," she told him, having spent the last five years unable to regain any memory of that night. "In fact, until I found out that I was with child, I had almost convinced myself that it never happened at all."

"I…I do not remember anything either…at least not specifically," he said, silently chiding himself for only telling the partial truth. Yet did vague dreams and little snippets of what may, or may not, be fact truly count? "But now that you are back, Bina and her father can be held accountable for her actions," Fili growled, still enraged at the harpy's manipulative scheme.

"Fili…no!" she gasped, rolling over and scooting across the bed until she could see over the side, just making out his face in the dark. "If we were to do anything, make any accusations against them, wouldn't that only bring the truth to light, thus hurting our son in the process? We can't risk it…not with Flinn's future at stake. Wouldn't it be best to just forget it all, and move on?" Sier asked, not liking the idea of having to deal with those vile creatures again. "Must we dredge up old wounds?"

"I…I suppose I can see your point," Fili said with a heavy sigh, lacing his fingers together and placing them behind his head as he looked up at her. "And I promise not to do anything without speaking to you first…but it boils my blood to think of her getting away with such villainy. She should be made to pay!"

"Well, in some ways she is," Sier stated. "She is an unhappy, selfish, spoiled dam, who will never know joy or love. While you and I have a wonderful little dwarrow, who loves us both very much. What better way to punish her, than to enjoy what we have and live our lives free of the souring effects of her hate?"

There was silence between them for a few moments, with Sier holding her breath as she waited for Fili to answer.

"You amaze me," Fili finally whispered, the awe in his voice shining through. "How can you demonstrate such forgiveness, when I might never be able to overlook her treachery?"

"Just spend more time with Flinn, and you would be amazed at what you find yourself capable of," she suggested.

"Thank you," he smiled. "I think that is a prescription I will be only too happy to comply with."

Pleased that they had reached an understanding on the subject, at least for now, Sier rolled back over into her place on the other side of the bed. There she lay, on her back as well, staring up at the ceiling, just like Fili. They were quiet for a long time once more, but it was obvious to both that neither one had yet found sleep.

"Fili?" he again heard her call from the darkness.

"Yes?"

"What you told Flinn was right," she began, nervously playing with the blanket's edge as she spoke. "This bed is very large. And if you were to…share it with me, I don't believe it would make me feel terribly uncomfortable."

"Oh?" Fili asked with a quirk of his eyebrow, that being all he could think to say in response.

"And I was thinking…if Flinn did come in tonight, wouldn't he be confused to find you sleeping on the floor?" she added, playing on his love for his son to help convince him. "Unless it would make you feel awkward…I wouldn't want to pressure you one way or the other. I just thought that…"

"No," Fili broke in, hating to hear the uncertainty in her voice. "I…I guess it would be fine. I mean…just as long as you are all right with it."

"It was my idea…remember?" she giggled, finding it humorous how they were both dancing around each other's feelings.

"Yes…right," he mumbled.

There were a few tense moments of silence, followed by the sound of Fili rising to his feet, and then the gentle dip of the bed as he slowly climbed in, keeping himself on the very edge. Once the covers had stopped moving and quiet once more reigned within the room, Sier gave a small smile of triumph and turned onto her side, facing away from him.

"Good night, Fili," she whispered.

"Good night, Sier."

Shhhhhh, lets leave the unsuspecting love birds to sleep now...shall we?

That is, if you THINK they are going to sleep, ha ha.

Was Fili a good daddy to say Flinn could come in and sleep with them if 'Sier' got scared? Or for making his bed on the floor first? How did you like their converstation?

What do you think will happen next?

Guest Reviews:

Ummmm, there are none!? Where did all my lovely guest reviewers go? Granted, I did update this one pretty fast, but I do hope you will all be back next time!