Chapter 15

I hurried back to the apartments and knocked on Arthur's door. Clearly, he was waiting on the other side of it, as he flung it open almost before I'd finished knocking.

"Are you all right?" he demanded. "He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No, nothing like that." I smiled and closed the door behind me.

"He doesn't want you back?"

"No. He's seeing someone. Besides, it wouldn't matter if he did want me back. I told you, I only want you."

Arthur nodded. "But I always think you'll find someone better. Someone better looking, without all my problems."

"I won't." I slid my hand into his as we sat down on his sofa. "He's going to give me enough money to get a nice place. Ten thousand."

"Ten?" Arthur's eyes widened. "I thought you said he lost five thousand of your money."

"Yeah, well he wants to give me extra for 'pain and suffering,' he said. For all the stress he put me under, and everything I lost other than money. He doesn't expect anything in return. He's been going to Gamblers Anonymous, and one of the things he has to do is try to make amends with everyone he's hurt."

"Do you think you can trust him? You said he was a liar."

"Well, we'll see. Either he'll send me the money, or he won't."

"What if he wants something in return? Even though he said he doesn't."

"It'll be his hard luck. He won't get anything from me."

I didn't hear anything from Paul for the next week, and I convinced myself he was full of shit as usual. I cursed myself for believing he might have turned over a new leaf and tried to swallow my disappointment over it. I'd tried to tell myself it wouldn't happen, but I hadn't been able to stop myself looking in the windows of a property rental company every time I passed, checking out the nice apartments on the other side of the city. There were several new blocks surrounding a park and they looked perfect. But I was daydreaming. I would probably never get to live in one of them.

I didn't voice my annoyance to Arthur. He'd had a bad couple of days where his depression kicked him in the arse. He spent a whole day in bed, and the day after, he could barely manage to speak to me, although he somehow forced himself to do two gigs at the children's hospital.

The next day, he came to the shelter to meet me after I finished work and he looked much better. He sat at a table in the corner and waited for me to finish booking in four people wanting beds for the night.

"Audra, sorry, I forgot to give you this," Toby said suddenly, dropping an envelope on the desk beside me. "A man dropped it off earlier. I think you went to the bathroom or something. I was busy, so I put it in my pocket and forgot."

"No problem, thanks." I picked up the envelope, then grabbed my coat and bag. "I'm off now. See you tomorrow." I opened the envelope as I went to where Arthur was sitting. My name was written on the front, and I recognised Paul's scrawly handwriting.

"What's that?" Arthur asked.

"It's from Paul." I looked inside and found only one thing there—a cheque. I peered in without taking it out of the envelope to draw the attention of my colleagues and the line of people waiting to book a bed. "It's what he promised." I bit my lip to stop the smile that threatened to split my face in two. "I'd started to think he wasn't going to bother. Let's get out of here."

I put the envelope in my bag and clutched the bag tight against me as we left the shelter. Arthur placed his arm around my shoulders as we walked.

"It's really what he told you?" Arthur lowered his head and whispered in my ear. "Ten thousand?"

"Yes." I giggled a little, finally able to let myself be excited. "I kept walking past a property office this week and trying not to look at the lovely new apartments they're advertising, because I didn't think he was going to send it. Now we can look. We can choose together."

"Are you sure you want me to help you choose? It's going to be your place." Arthur sighed, and his mouth turned down at the corners.

"Hey. It's going to be our place, remember? We talked about it. It's sooner than I expected, but why wait? Unless you don't want to. It'd be a big change."

"I want to. But I thought maybe, um, I don't know. People say things and don't mean them. I wasn't sure—"

I stopped walking and faced him. "Arthur, I'm not 'people.' I'm your Audra. I love you. I wouldn't move somewhere else without you. Whatever I say to you, I mean it. If you want to share a new home with me, then I want us to choose it together. It's definitely what I want."

"Even with all my problems?"

"Even then." I didn't remind him we'd already had this conversation. He'd convinced himself I hadn't meant it, or it had happened differently. "I'm not working the day after tomorrow. How about we look then, if you don't have too many jobs?"

"All right." He smiled a little but didn't look overly enthusiastic. I wondered if he had doubts about leaving the home he'd had for years, even though it was crappy, or if he had doubts about sharing his life with me. Perhaps we needed to talk about it some more before we got carried away.

The following evening, after we ate dinner together in my apartment, and were snuggled up in my bed, I brought it up again. My head rested on Arthur's shoulder, and I was lightly stroking his chest with my fingertips. He had his eyes closed, every so often sighing with pleasure.

"Arthur, are you sure you want to look at new places with me?"

His eyes flew open. "Yes! Have you changed your mind? You don't want me to?"

"No, I haven't changed my mind. You seemed unsure about it yesterday. I want to make sure it's what you want. You've lived here a long time and—"

"Not by choice." He chuckled. "It's a shit hole. Sorry."

I laughed. "And you're okay with the idea of us living together?"

"Aren't we almost doing that anyway? My stuff's still in my place, but I'm here nearly every night."

"That's true. I just don't want you to feel like you're being pushed into this. That you're sure it's what you want."

"I'm sure. I still find it hard to believe you want to live with me, but every time I doubt it, you show me you mean it. I'm starting to get the message." He grinned, then sighed. "Things are okay with me at the moment, but you know I'll still have bad days. I'm always going to have bad days. You might regret me being there, in your new place."

"I know there will be bad days. I know you'll feel bad sometimes and not want to talk or do things, and that's okay. But I won't regret having you with me."

"And we can really afford one of those new apartments?"

"Sure. I can pay for six months up front from that cheque. With our wages pooled together, we'll be able to afford it and be better off than we are now. The train journey into the city will be shorter from the other side, too."

"Then let's go and look at one." Arthur turned onto his side to face me and tugged me harder against him. "I can't wait."

In the morning, we ate breakfast together before Arthur went back to his apartment to take a bath and change into fresh clothes. An hour later, we travelled into the city and went to the property office. We stood outside, gazing at the pictures of the new apartments and imagining ourselves living in one, before we went inside and found that the agent was about to take the sign down. All of the apartments had been taken.

Arthur's face fell, and I imagined mine did, too. "Have you anything similar?" I asked. "Same sort of area?"

"Actually—" The agent, who had introduced herself as Emily, picked up a brochure and invited us to sit at her desk. "We've only just received the details on this one. We haven't put it in the window yet, but we were holding off because it's not actually available straight away." She pushed the brochure across the desk for us to look at. "The current tenants have handed in their notice, but they gave plenty of warning—six weeks. The apartment is less than half a mile from the new ones. It's in a five-year-old block—Riverside. Perhaps you've heard of it?"

I shook my head. I hadn't heard of it, but the brochure depicted a pleasant-looking six-storey building overlooking the river, much closer than the new blocks. The apartment advertised was a two-bedroom one on the fourth floor, larger than the ones we'd hoped for. The price was only a hundred a month more.

"It's a gated area with excellent security," Emily went on. "If you have a car, there's parking available to one side. Utilities and service charges are all included in the rent as you would expect. The living room is furnished—" She flipped over a page of the brochure to show us a modern lounge suite, a table and chairs to seat four people, and a large cabinet on which a TV and video recorder sat. "The TV and knick-knacks you see on the windowsill, and the other personal items will be taken, but the furniture stays. The kitchen is fully fitted out." She turned another page to show the smart cream and brown kitchen, complete with oven, fridge, and even a washing machine. "Again, the kettle and toaster and the other usual items you see will be gone, but the white goods all stay. The two bedrooms will be unfurnished but carpeted and with curtains."

Arthur and I pored over the brochure, reading the details and looking at the pictures.

"When the existing tenants move out, we'll arrange a full professional clean, so the keys will be available around eight weeks from now. If you're interested, I can arrange for you to see it today," Emily went on. "We have a spare set of keys, and the existing tenants are happy for us to show it as long as the viewings are when they're out at work, so it doesn't inconvenience them."

I glanced at Arthur. "What do you think?"

"It's more expensive," he whispered.

"Only a hundred. Do you like it? I like it."

"There isn't any bedroom furniture."

Our city housing apartments were fully furnished—cheaply, but at least they had everything needed.

"I'll buy some," I whispered back. "We can choose together."

"It's not ready for eight weeks," he reminded me. "That's a good thing. You have time to change your mind." He gave me a shy grin.

"That won't happen, but it gives you more time to get to know me. To trust me." I smiled and quirked an eyebrow.

"I already do," he whispered.

"We'd like to see it," I told Emily.

She smiled. "One of my colleagues will be in that area later this morning. If you'd like to make your way to the apartment for eleven thirty, he'll let you in." She passed me a business card with the name Brian Andrews printed on it, along with a small picture of a grey-haired man. "He'll meet you outside the block. Should you like the apartment, he'll have the necessary paperwork with him. We'll require a deposit and bond equating to three months' rent. Only one month is required immediately; the rest after the current tenants leave."

"That sounds good," I said. I'd already thought of paying for six months up front, but saving the extra money would help buying furniture, and the rest could be put aside to pay rent when it was due.

Ten minutes later, Arthur and I made our way on foot towards the apartment block. It was around a mile to walk, but we dawdled, talking about what may become our new home. I couldn't help feeling excited, even though we hadn't seen it and may yet find it unsuitable.

We looked at the building from outside the gates, noting the parking area to one side, with its neat white lines painted to give spaces for a dozen cars. Flower borders and shrubs in pots surrounded this, and the building itself looked smart and new. Trees and the river were close enough for all but the ground floor apartments to have a view of them, if their windows faced that way.

Brian Andrews arrived at exactly eleven thirty, and greeted us with warm handshakes, although he paid more attention to Arthur. The man in the relationship was always in charge with some people. I swallowed my irritation and simply smiled, then bit back a laugh when Arthur told Brian he should talk to me about everything.

Brian let us into the gated area and opened the main door to the building by keying a code into a panel in the wall. Inside, we travelled up to the fourth floor in a smooth, quiet lift with doors that slid open with only a whisper.

"I'd move here just for the lift," Arthur said in a low voice.

"Me too."

There were only three apartments on each floor, and the one we were to look at was at the opposite side of the building to the parking area, meaning at least some of the windows would have the river view. Brian stood in the hallway of the apartment, allowing us to wander around the rooms.

The floors in each room were carpeted in thick-piled beige or grey, so they would go with any colour scheme. The main bedroom was blue and grey, which I could live with, while the second bedroom was very pink and fussy.

"It's so pink," I muttered.

"You're quite welcome to decorate in whatever colours you choose," Brian called out. "Tenants are expected to keep the place fresh and smart, so you can paint or wallpaper as you see fit, if you decide to take the apartment."

"Green is nice," Arthur said.

"It is." I headed into the kitchen. It was bright turquoise, which the photos had toned down somewhat. "Yellow in here, would be better." I peered out of the window and spotted a glint of water to the left. "Let's look in the living room. We should have a full view of the river from there."

I was right. The trees scattered along the riverbank were bare and brown at the moment, but in a few weeks' time, when the apartment was available, the water would sparkle from between green branches and bushes.

"It's beautiful." Arthur voiced my thoughts. "Even with the trees all wintery."

"It's perfect. The furniture's nice, too." I sat carefully on the middle cushion of the couch. "So comfy."

Arthur sat beside me. "I like it," he said. "Very much. But it must be your choice. You're, um, you're paying the deposit."

"Still, I wouldn't take it if you didn't like it," I told him. "Is there anything you don't like?"

"No." He shook his head vigorously. "It's much nicer than the old place, and you'll be in it. That's all that's important to me."

"Then we'll take it." I stood again and went to find Brian. "We'd like to take the apartment," I told him. "Can we see the paperwork, please?"