Dorian wasn't quite sure what to except when he arrived at the Tilani household, but whatever it was, he had not expected what he actually did see.
Maevaris, as it turned out, was everything the other Magisters said she was, but in a good way.
Her house, while built in the typical Tevinter style, had large open windows and consisted mostly of white and light-coloured stone. The large garden outside was filled with beautiful flowers and plant life, bushes and trees carefully cut and shaped into magnificent animals and shapes; she even had a fountain shaped like a dragon on the front, a torrent of water spewing out from the gaping mouth and into a circular pool.
Dorian was still staring as he approached the large door, giving it a few, solid knocks with the brass-coloured knocker. He kept his back turned to the door and only turned when he heard the door creek open. When a young man, a human, opened the door enough to see out, Dorian could not help but stare at him and the very light clothes he was wearing.
Covered, yes, but the cut of the light-blue tunic and cream-colored pants complimented the man's physique in a way that Dorian could definitely appreciate.
All of a sudden, his own dark robes, while made of fine, light silk, along with the silken pants, undershirt and light leather boots felt much to heavy and covering.
"Ah, welcome! I trust you are one of Lady Maevaris' guests?"
"Ah, I… Yes. I am. Dorian Pavus," Dorian managed to press out, amazed that he was able to sound so calm and collected when he felt taken completely off guard by the man in front of him.
"I do hope I am not late...?"
"Not at all," the man said as he opened the door further, bowing deeply as he allowed Dorian inside.
"Please, do follow me. The Mistress will be delighted to see you."
Raising an eyebrow, Dorian followed the lightly-clad man, trying his best to resist the urge to peer down at his buttocks. Maevaris was a Magister unlike all others, but it still wasn't appropriate to ogle people of the same sex while in public, at least not in an appreciative way.
He was swiftly guided into a large indoor bathing area, where several other people were already gathered; some of the guests looked as nervous and out of place as Dorian felt, but others seemed to have started relaxing, chatting and helping themselves to wine and fruit from the many tables.
"Ah, Dorian! Wonderful to see you here, I am so glad you accepted!"
Maevaris came down upon him like lightning from the sky, kissing his cheek as soon as she was close enough.
Dorian imagined his face was a mix of surprise and a little bit of terror as he was quite efficiently stunned into place.
He had to give it to her though.
Her mannerism when it came to people was warm, welcoming, open; so unlike everything he was used to when it came to social gatherings and while it was somewhat uncomfortable, Dorian had to admit that he had never felt more… Welcome.
"I… It was an honour to be invited, Magister Tilani, of course I would accept," he managed to croak out after a few seconds of just staring, even managing to bring up a smile.
"Please, none of that "Magister" business under my own roof. You are my honoured guest," Maevaris smiled as she snatched two glasses of ruby-red wine from the plate of a passing servant.
"Wine, my dear?"
"Yes, please," Dorian said, reaching over to accept the glass while suppressing the urge to just down the entire thing right away.
This… This was terribly confusing and exciting at once. Exciting because he was in the presence with a very well-known Magister and confusing because he had no idea why he was there.
"So indulge me, Magi-… Maevaris. What inspired you to host this grand party of yours?"
"To show everybody that there is another way," Maevaris said while gesturing to the room.
"All these people here have something in common. They are bright, idealistic people whose opinions, dreams and suggestions are all to make Tevinter better."
She let out a small chuckle and gave Dorian a sweet smile. "In short… This is me trying my very best to inspire the youth of Tevinter. You know what they say; you are our future. I just want to make sure that you are-," she started, pausing for a moment while tapping her finger against her wine-glass.
"-heading in the right direction, so to speak," she finished after a few seconds of careful consideration.
"And what direction is that," Dorian asked before nipping at the sweet red wine.
"Ah, ah, I will announce that later," Maevaris said. "You are eager though. Eager and curious. I like that."
"I have to be if I am to get anything done," Dorian mused before his eyes were drawn to a man quickly walking over to Maevaris, carrying a book in his arms.
"My lady, a quick word?"
"Of course, my dear. What is it?"
As the man started speaking, Dorian allowed himself to politely "tune out", not wanting to eaves-drop on their conversation. Instead he took the time to somewhat discreetly take in the man's appearance, trying his best to place him.
He was obviously not a slave, at least not a regular one if the outfit and general appearance was anything to go by. He was dressed in a simple, but very formfitting and elegant outfit; black jacket with simple embroidery on the cuffs and neck, silver buttons and a cut that ended just across his buttocks and front. The pants were also black, but without the embroidery on it, complimented only by the dark leather boots and silver buckles that decorated them.
His black hair was short and carefully mussed, giving it a perfect mix of "controlled chaos" that Dorian so very adored. His eyes, the colour of fine whiskey, the sharp lines to his jaw and cheekbones and the lips… Oh, Dorian very much enjoyed what he was seeing.
He just hoped his tongue wasn't hanging out of his mouth.
"Oh, but where are my manners," Maevaris suddenly said, breaking Dorian out of his daydream as she addressed him.
"Dorian, this is my darling book-keeper and quaestor, Rilenius. Rilenius, this is Dorian Pavus. With any luck, you will see quite a bit more off him in the time that comes."
Dorian arched his eyebrow at the comment, curious as to what Maevaris meant while Rilenius merely bowed and smiled.
"An honour, Lord Pavus."
"The pleasure is all mine," Dorian replied, nodding his head politely while Maevaris smiled.
"You will have to excuse me, but I am afraid duty is calling. Just some financial business, dreadfully boring stuff. But do enjoy yourself, Dorian. Have more wine, find some food, find someone nice and lovely to chat with. Everything lovely is allowed under my roof. And I mean everything," she winked before wandering off with Rilenius to handle her affairs.
Dorian stared after them before downing the glass of wine, immediately seeking a new one along with something to eat.
She certainly had spared no expenses, but as far as Dorian had heard, she was pretty well off thanks to her father and her partner. Not that the woman didn't deserve it; she was obviously hard working and, by the looks of it, very generous. This wasn't a party to impress, this was to bring familiarity and comfort; simple, but delicious food, soft music, dances, sparsely decorated and no slave ready to lick their feet at their command.
It was refreshing and, in all honestly, must more preferable than the great events tossed by other Magisters. Dorian still had the memory of a slave all but killed for the amusement of others fresh in mind and quite frankly, it made him sick to even think about it. He tried to avoid those parties the best he could, but sometimes it was unavoidable.
At least his father thought it equally disgusting and though he didn't speak up against it, he didn't do it when hosting parties himself, nor did he allow it in his home.
A small comfort and a piss-poor excuse, but Dorian had learned to take his victories where he could by now.
Popping a date into his mouth, Dorian chewed on it slowly, savouring the sweetness as he just let his eyes roam over the room, trying his best to get a feel of the mood that was going on there.
It certainly seemed pleasant enough, even if some people were quite obviously separating themselves away from the others, choosing to have private conversations with what Dorian assumed were colleagues or even friends. Most were young, about his age, but there were a few that seemed to be older, closer to the age of his father.
It was only then he noticed that there was more to the party than a simply gathering of like-minded people.
It was hard to notice at first because clearly there was a fear and discomfort to it, but one look in the right direction at the right time was all Dorian needed to see it.
There, in a corner, discreetly talking and looking just like any other pair of men having a pleasant and friendly conversation, if not for the fact that their fingers were ever so gently touching one another. Never long, only for a second or two before they pulled way, only to return a few seconds later.
Discreetly, hidden.
By the pool, two women were talking, but the looks they shared were not that of friends, but of longing. The smiles were shy, the gaze warm and while they did not touch one another, they stood close, as if whispering secrets to one another.
Now that he had seen it, Dorian was seeing it everywhere and for a moment he felt panicked. Was this a coincidence or was this part of some plan? Was this Maevaris' intention and if it was, what was the intention?
"You seem a little panicked, my lord."
Jumping a little, Dorian almost dropped his glass as the young man Maevaris had spoken to earlier had seemingly appeared out of nowhere.
The man, Rilenius, merely chuckled and smiled some when he got no further answer from Dorian. "My apologizes, my lord. I did not mean to startle you."
"I… No, it's… It's fine," Dorian said, clearing his throat some as he worked on regaining his composure, not wanting to be caught with his pants down so to speak.
"I am merely curious about the nature of this gathering, that is all. I know she spoke of inspiring the youth of Tevinter, but I am not sure how she plans to do this."
"One that will be revealed soon," Rilenius promised as he gave Dorian a small smile, though still keeping a respectful distance and attitude towards him.
"So I hope you can stand the suspension a little longer."
"I am sure I will be able to find some entertainment here to keep my mind off it," Dorian replied as he took a sip from his wine.
"If not, I find that alcohol always works well in passing the time. That, and present company isn't bad."
Dorian winced mentally as he let that one slip, but hoped that Rilenius wouldn't take offence or, better yet, not understand what he had just implied.
He knew it was just a back-hand comment that could be taken in a hundred different ways, but in his mind, that one, forbidden interpretation would always scream the loudest.
"I certainly try my best, even if I cannot entertain for long," Rilenius mused, giving Dorian another smile.
"But we shall meet again, Lord Pavus."
"Oh," Dorian asked before his attention was brought to a sudden silence that swept through the room as Maevaris stepped up on a small, elevated platform by the large indoor pool.
"Greetings to you all, and thank you for honouring me with your presence on this lovely night," she called out, smiling as she held her hands out towards them.
"I am sure many of you are curious as to why you are here. Some of you may have guessed it, but I can see looks of curiosity on most of your faces. It is precious," she teased gently, giggling softly as people started glancing at one another, insecurity flashing across their faces.
"Oh, but do relax, this is nothing dangerous," she laughed, bringing her right hand to her chest.
"This is my way of showing how many allies you have. You are all here because of the way you think. You are here because you are bright, you are curious and you want something different, something better for our precious Imperium. You are here because you have spoken how the Imperium needs to change, quickly, for the better, but out of fear of not being heard, you have never dared to fight it." She gestured with the other hand towards the crowd.
"But look around you and see that you are not alone. These are people who want things better. Who wants change. And together, you will have a voice loud enough to be heard by even the Archon himself."
She smiled some as she looked at the people, allowing them a moment to digest the words.
"I am not saying to revolt; this is not a revolution. That will not solve anything, not in this day and age. Fire cannot fight against fire, not here. But you are young, you are the sons and daughters of Magisters, of mages in prominent positions. You are heirs and one day you will get your seat in the Magisterium. This is a party to show that you have the power, the knowledge and the people behind you to make yourself heard. So use tonight to gather new friends. True friends."
Accepting a glass of wine from one of her slaves, Maevaris lifted it up high.
"A toast. For what I hope will be new friendships, maybe even partnerships. In this house, you are free to speak your mind, always. You are free to be who you are," she smiled as she looked at the guests.
"Of course… no abuse towards my servants. That is not tolerated. They are here, serving you, and shall be treated with respect. If you have a problem with anything, you take it with me, not them."
As the guests started clapping, with Dorian himself doing the same, he found himself surprised by Maevaris' words and her attitude. She truly was not like other Magisters Dorian had ever seen or visited.
It was inspiring and for a moment Dorian felt that would more people like her in the Magisterium, then perhaps change could happen in the Imperium, but not just the obvious state of things. In her speech, she had implied the little things as well; things such as referring to her slaves as servants, how she would not tolerate abuse against them for things that were not their fault, how people would be free to be themselves… It was refreshing.
Still, he was not sure if that all she wanted to convey to the people that were gathered; he wasn't sure why or what, but he felt certain that there was more behind it.
The evening passed rather pleasantly and as the wine continued to flow, the nerves of the people at the gather seemed to grow.
Dorian found himself in interesting conversations with other students, men and women alike, talking about everything and anything under the sun; politics, fashion, magic, literature, whatever they seemed willing to talk about.
And there was flirting. Oh, so much of it and Dorian found that he enjoyed it greatly.
There didn't seem to be the usual lid on things as both men and women propositioned him, but while he did respond flirtatiously back to either gender, mostly out of habit, he found himself veiling more promise into his words when talking with the men.
He did not see Rilenius for the rest of the evening, which disappointed him somewhat, but he did get another chance to speak to Maevaris.
Or rather, she sought him out herself.
He had taken a moment to himself to draw some air, feeling the pleasant buzz from the alcohol hum through his body, and thus had excused himself to the outside garden for some fresh air.
"Ah, there you are," a chipper voice sounded from behind him followed by the sound of her heels hitting the marble-floor.
"You vanished so quickly that I thought you had fled."
Dorian laughed softly, though it was mostly to mask his own nervousness.
"No, I wouldn't dream of doing that. I just needed some air, it got quite hot in there."
"It usually does," Maevaris mused while nipping at the wine she has brought with her outside. "But I do hope you are enjoying yourself, at least a little."
"It was certainly a sight I haven't seen before," Dorian confessed before glancing at her. "Is… this the norm? For you, I mean?"
"Whatever do you mean?" Maevaris asked, but the teasing smile on her lips told Dorian that she was baiting him just a little. She wanted him to be open about what he had seen.
"The… Couplings in there. I noticed that they were-," Dorian started before trailing off, feeling his cheeks redden.
"-Never mind. It is not important."
Maevaris merely chuckled and smiled some. "As you say, dear Dorian. As you say. Just know that as long as you are under this roof, you are free to be yourself, exactly as you are."
Dorian raised an eyebrow, though there was a glimmer of insecurity in his eyes, something he was unable to hide away. When he didn't speak, Maevaris continued to smile before filling the silent void between them.
"You may not see it yet, but I do this because I know. Because I understand how you feel, Dorian," Maevaris murmured, her voice soft and kind as she continued smiling gently at him. "I know you do not know me. And you certainly have no reason to trust me, speak to me, confine in me or even be a friend. But I know how you feel. I know how it is to not be true to oneself and embrace what you know to be the truth, all in the name of dignity and saving face."
"I am not sure what you are talking about," Dorian said, automatically feeling the protective walls come up around him.
Maevaris just smiled and nipped at her wine. "I think you do, Dorian. And you may not be ready for it now, but when you are… I am willing to be a listening ear. An ally who knows what you are going through."
Dorian continued to remain silent, though his hands were gripping hard at the balcony railings as he stared out ahead.
"Of course, there is more to it than just that," Maevaris continued.
"I just find that people who have experienced a need to hide themselves to be the ones more willing and able to create change. They see things that nobody else does, namely the things that are wrong or unjust. Things that needs to be changed. And I find that those who are able to see that those who are-." She paused for a moment, tapping a manicured finger against her chin before continuing. "-those who are free-thinking."
Dorian couldn't help but let out a bitter laugh as she finished, shaking his head ever so slightly. "I may be young, Magister Tilani. And inexperienced. Naïve, perhaps. But even I know that you would find yourself hard pressed to find that in Tevinter."
"And yet I have gathered an entire mansion full of them, young Master Pavus," Maevaris retorted, smirking a little.
"I can see that you are defensive. And with reason. You had a hard past and even know you struggle."
"Did you invite me here to lecture me?" Dorian asked as he finally turned his head around, giving Maevaris a tired look. "Because right now, I am a little confused as to why. You spoke of grandeur in there, but to me, you speak of… Acceptance. Of like-minded people."
"Oh Dorian," Maevaris murmured, the cheerful smile vanishing as a sadder look replaced it. "You have truly experienced hardship. Even know, you have a hard time seeing a hand that is offered in kindness instead of hardship. Too used to the hand striking you instead of caressing you."
"Magister, I am not comfortable with the direction this conversation is taking," Dorian replied, his tone a bit harsher than he intended, but the sudden implications were leaving his heart raising, creating a state of mild panic.
He did not care if the room behind him was filled with men or women that had the preferences he did, he did not care if someone like Maevaris, who had faced more challenges head-on than any other Magister he knew, was supporting him.
It was too close to home. A secret being revealed too fast and he wasn't ready for it.
It was almost torture, feeling the shame mix itself with the voice that told him that he was okay. That it was okay.
"Of course," Maevaris said instead, giving Dorian a small, but kind smile. "I will desist this part of our conversation."
"This part?"
"Yes. Because there is more I wish to talk to you about. Specifically, about the desperate need for change."
"Yes, you were quite passionate about that," Dorian murmured, tilting his head some.
"I will admit, I do have my own agenda in all this. Many of the people here, while young, idealistic, willing to make a change, do not have the balls for it," Maevaris said while finally walking towards the railing, looking over the darkening back garden.
"They lack a voice and what they need is a voice to follow until they can find their own. They are so… Used to the way things are and while they know it is wrong, that change is needed, they are suppressed by the older generation because they have a voice, a status, a position within the Imperium. It is hard to stand up against them when you know that it can easily result in your death."
"And?"
"And based on what I have heard about you, Dorian Pavus, I believe that you have a voice. A loud one, one that can be used."
Dorian arched an eyebrow at the comment. "I am not sure what you- "
He snapped his lips shut as Maevaris' pressed a perfectly manicured finger against his lips.
"You will, in time. Only a fool has missed what you have done so far, Dorian. I have read your theories, I have heard about your debates, your arguments and I am very, very curious about what else is hiding behind those grey eyes of yours."
She continued to smile as she removed her finger from on top of Dorian's mouth. "Which is why I too shall support you financially, Dorian. Your theories and your research intrigue me and I want to ensure that you have the support you need because I know that what you do will help benefit Tevinter. In fact, I am so much confidence in you that I am going to let you borrow Rilenius."
"… What?"
"Well, you liked him, didn't you? You seemed to enjoy talking to him tonight and I believe he will provide some assistance to you, when it comes to handling your finances."
"I am able to handle my finances on my own, thank you," Dorian replied with a slight frown.
"Right now, yes, but what will you do when you start gaining more support? Making your own money, buying a place of your own, paying for help and servants?"
"I do know math, Magisters."
"Yes, I am not speaking of your knowledge. I am speaking of time." Maevaris laughed, smiling at Dorian. "Trust me, I know my numbers, but I barely have the time. But Rilenius has been a treasure and I would be completely lost without him. I want to help you and I believe he can help. That and he will be able to bring my support to you or to your treasury of choice. Maybe even some news."
"That is… Very generous of you," Dorian said, feeling speechless and quite frankly, more than a little lost and confused. He had no idea where he had her and where this sudden support came from.
Alexius… He understood that. He had worked under him, Alexius knew what he could do, but this woman… Yes, she had heard about him, for better or for worse, and yet she was willing to offer him help. Support.
Nobody except for Alexius had done that before.
"Not generous. I am merely putting some money into the future," Maevaris winked as she pushed herself away from the railings.
"Do enjoy yourself for the rest of the evening. I will let Rilenius come by your apartment during the week with the first of my support."
Before Dorian could say anything further, Maevaris vanished back inside, leaving him alone in the chilled evening with his thoughts.
His head was spinning and he wished he could say it was from the wine, but if anything, he felt even more sober now than he had when he first arrived.
Maevaris' sudden support… It was unexpected.
He knew that many Magisters were watching him; that was half the point of the many debates and social gatherings he partook in, but he hadn't expected for anyone to support him outside of Alexius, a support that would end as soon as he was done with his education.
That was another thing that somewhat frightened him. What would happen once he was done with his studies and had reached the rank he wanted. He would have to take a long, hard look at his responsibilities then and one of them was marriage.
He understood Maevaris' intentions.
He understood that she wanted to show him, to show everybody that it was possible to live a life where one could be free to express oneself, to show the world who they were. In fact, she had already paid the price for her way of living.
Dorian… Dorian wasn't sure he could pay that price.
For now, he wanted to focus on what was happening here and now. The future was an unknown; ever changing and unpredictable.
He was hoping that with just a little more time, then maybe… Just maybe…
He was hoping. But he also knew that he was hoping for a lie. He just didn't want to admit it.
He wasn't ready to.