Chapter 6 To go or not to go

Fanny just arrived back after her morning ride. Robert, the groom, helped her dismount and then she followed him into the stables, so she could look after the horse herself. By now, the grooms were used to her doing that and they good-naturedly let her.

Her ride had been pleasant. Today she had gone alone, which of late hadn't happened much. In the past two weeks a few times she had gone out with just Mr Crawford. Other times they went as a group of four and once she had gone together with Miss Crawford. At first, Fanny had found it a bit awkward. Mary's character and disposition were so different from her own. She was as lively as her brother and often spoke her mind. But Fanny had to admit she had become quite accustomed to these traits through Mr Crawford. So, gradually, during her ride with Mary, she had started to feel more at ease. They were now on first-name basis, which Fanny felt was an honour. She never really had had friends. Edmund came closest, but he was her cousin, which made it a bit different. But to be able to call Mary Crawford her friend, was not something she had imagined when the two siblings first came into the neighbourhood.

It had been good to go out on her own today. As much as she enjoyed riding out with the others, sometimes it was nice to go by oneself. It helped her to think about things. About how her life had changed since the additions to the parsonage. But it couldn't take away the sting of rejection she felt daily with her family. Her aunt's disparaging remarks got worse by the day. And she did not know why. She wondered if her aunt's attitude had something to do with the fact that it was her who was with her uncle Mr Norris on the day he died. Her aunt had certainly got worse after that, even though it was now nearly three years ago.

Fanny sighed and after a last stroke of affection to Ariel, she left the stables to return to the house.

In the door opening of the stables, she bumped into one of the few people she wished she had never met, Mr Rushworth.
In the past few weeks he had been to London, but apparently had come back now.
"Hello Miss Price. Such a pleasure as always to see you again!" His way of talking always sent shivers to her spine.
"Good morning, Mr Rushworth," she only replied.
"Have you not more to say? I see you have been riding today. Little Fanny Price on a horse. Maybe you should ride with me one day."
"Excuse me, I need to return to the house," she said.
Unfortunately, Mr Rushworth blocked her path and seemed not inclined to let her through.
"Ah come, Miss Price. Stay a while! I have missed your company when I was in London. No one is as pretty as you, you know. So… delectable." That last was said in a low, seductive tone.
"Sir, please let me through." Fanny tried to keep her temper, as it would only make it worse if she lost it.
"Have you not missed me? I am sure you have. Well, I will be staying for a little while. How pleasant it shall be."
He lifted his hand to touch her; with the other he was still holding on to the reins of his horse.
She shifted out of his reach.
"Come, come. You want it. Don't be so shy."
Why could he not just let her go?

To her immense relief, Robert appeared behind her.
"Mr Rushworth, sir. Are you in need of some help with your horse?"
Mr Rushworth moved out of the way and Fanny escaped, nearly running to the house.

Once in her room, she sat down on her bed. She was shaking all over. She had been so frightened. Oh, how she wished she would never have to see that man again. She knew that might only happen after he was married to Maria, which would not be until after Sir Thomas' return. She prayed that he would come back swiftly.
How was she to get through the coming days, when Mr Rushworth would be around? She remembered his horrible, improper behaviour from before his engagement to Maria. But he seemed far more reckless now. She wished she could stay in her room, with the door locked.
But that was not to be. She knew she must go downstairs to help her aunt Bertram. If only she could prevent being alone with that man for any amount of time!

After she had calmed down a bit, she changed herself out of her riding habit and hesitantly walked downstairs to the drawing room. At every corner she waited and looked around if he was not nearby.
She sighed a breath of relief when she arrived safely at the drawing room. There present were her two aunts and Maria and Mr Rushworth himself.
While she didn't want to see him, this was maybe the safest place for the moment, with other people around and especially her aunt Norris, watching her closely all the time. For now, she was nearly glad of that fact.

The rest of the day passed uneventful. Edmund had gone riding with Julia, Mary and Mr Crawford. They came back late in the afternoon and Edmund announced to his mother that the Crawfords would be dining with them that evening.
"They are such attentive neighbours," Lady Bertram said.

Fanny awaited the evening with an equal amount of joy and trepidation. She was glad to see her friends again, but she was apprehensive of the fact that it might attract negative attention from aunt Norris. She was also not sure how Mr Rushworth would act. She remembered Mr Crawford's warnings concerning that man.
What would his reaction be this evening?

Fanny didn't need to wait long.
Henry was elated that they would dine at the great house. After a pleasant day on his horse, nothing would cheer him more than seeing the lovely Fanny Price.

His joy faltered when he discovered Mr Rushworth was once more of the party.
He noticed Fanny's weariness straight away. He greeted her with apparent indifference, but for his eyes – they sparkled with pleasure upon seeing her.

Dinner itself was pleasant enough. He was happy to see that Fanny did not have to sit next to Mr Rushworth this time, but sat far away from the man, on the other side of the table. Unfortunately, that also meant that he himself could hardly see her, but it was worth the sacrifice. She sat near his sister and Edmund and they seemed to have a lively conversation.

Henry was obliged to sit next to Mrs Norris, which was far from pleasant. The woman kept going on and on about Miss Julia's virtues and accomplishments, even though the girl was within hearing. Said girl, on the other hand, chatted happily away about their horse ride as if Mrs Norris wasn't speaking at all. He listened to both with half an ear and concentrated on his food, which was of quite good quality and very tasteful.

When they were all back in the drawing room, the conversation became general and the plans to visit Sotherton were renewed. A date was set and Henry was asked if they could use his carriage, as that had plenty of space to take everyone. He nodded reluctantly. He was more than happy to have his carriage used, but he was reluctant to be in Rushworth's company.
Edmund had decided Fanny should go too.
"Fanny, I know you shall like it very much. The grounds of Sotherton are said to be beautiful. Think of the joys of exploring it all, not to mention seeing the avenue. And the ride there! Yes Fanny, you really should go with us."

"Fanny cannot go! I will be going and Lady Bertram will be needing her when I am absent. Besides, I think the carriage will become too crowded if she joins us." Mrs Norris said.
"Aunt, my mother surely can spare her. And if not, I shall stay at home! Fanny should really go and see more of the country. I am determined."
"Edmund," came Fanny herself. "I do not really want to go. I do not mind staying with my aunt when you all go."
"Nonsense Fanny. It will do you good. You are going and that is the end of it."

Henry saw the mortification on her face. He very well could imagine why she would want to stay as far away as possible from Sotherton. Yet here she was forced to go. He wanted to speak up for her, but feared it would only make it worse.
He resolved to somehow help her enjoy the day, and also keep an eye on Rushworth to protect her.

Then Sophie spoke up. "Lady Bertram, if you would not want to be alone, I could come over and spend the day with you. That way Mr Bertram doesn't need to stay home and all the young people can enjoy this trip."
"Thank you Mrs Grant, I find I do like your suggestion and shall eagerly await your presence on that day." Lady Bertram seemed satisfied and so was Edmund. Only Fanny looked still unhappy.

Before they left that evening, Henry managed to exchange a few words with Fanny. "Miss Price, are you inclined to ride on the morrow? If so, would you mind me joining you?"
She smiled shyly. "Yes you may join me if you wish." His own smile was radiant. "Until tomorrow then!"

A fairly short chapter today. Let me know what you think. As you see here, Mr Rushworth is pretty much the villain in this story.