PROGRAMS OF BETRAYAL

Job 3: Towers of Sewage

Carmelita jumps from the safe-house window and jumps again immediately, not even bothering to land. She sails over the field and the head of one utterly oblivious guard, then makes her way through the field more normally. She can, and does, jump the river, so it doesn't matter one bit that the bridge is up. She reaches Bentley's rooftop a moment later, scowling hard.

Bentley's already there, of course; he's monitoring the castle and hotel for their targets. Murray and Otto had to take the longer way around, but they join her moments later. "Is everyone ready?" asks Bentley.

If anything, Carmelita's scowl gets worse. "I can't believe you're expecting me to go in the sewers," she says.

Bentley raises an eyebrow at her, then turns to the others. "Murray, Otto, are you ready?"

"You betcha, Bentley!"

"I could use some assistance getting my boat into position," says Otto.

"Great. Murray, you help him." Bentley turns back to Carmelita as the others jump off the roof. "Do you have a problem with the sewers?"

"Anyone sensible has a problem with sewers," Carmelita replies. She wraps her tail around her ankles. "I notice you're not going down them."

"No, but I have in the past," Bentley replies absently. He looks towards the castle again, checking, then straight at her. "You're not exactly going to be swimming in the sewage, the smell won't be any worse than the Haitian swamps where we dealt with Mizz Ruby years ago, and you don't have any problems with small spaces or you wouldn't have hidden in that sarcophagus when we were too late to steal the Clockwerk Parts from that museum."

"I'd need a warrant—"

"That's if we were in our time, and if we were doing this legally." Bentley adjusts his glasses. "And you didn't have any problems acting without a warrant when we were in Scotland. Something else is going on."

Carmelita's ears press flat to her head as a tank passes by below, briefly illuminating them both in deep red light. She sits on the edge of the roof and lets her legs dangle over. "I'm not a thief, Bentley."

"Of course not," Bentley says. "You're a—"

"Traveling with criminals. Knowing about crimes and not reporting them. Breaking the law myself." She glares at the next passing tank like it's responsible for all her problems. "And now I'm going to the sewers because I can't get in any other way? That's not—this isn't me. This is..." She trails off.

Bentley wheels over to put his hand on her shoulder. "When you first came after us, every crime had to be punished, remember? You didn't even notice The Panda King's illegal activities because it all had a legal front, and you didn't learn that things could be different than what they seem until you were framed by Constable Neyla."

Carmelita winces. "I don't like remembering that."

"When you went after Octavio in Venice, you ignored all sorts of small crimes so you could lock him up."

"How did you—"

"I read your reports. And then you lied about Sly being a cop so he wouldn't go to prison but could put more people in jail."

She snorts. "And look how that's turned out."

"The law doesn't make things good or evil, Inspector," Bentley says, taking his hand off her shoulder. "You've just seen it that way. And now you're having more luck doing good by being illegal, and that's a hard change. But what doesn't change is that we need to get into that tower to figure out what's going on, and the only way to do that is through the sewer. And you're going to be a vital part of that exercise."

Carmelita smiles, just a little. "You're right," she says, standing up. "Those two couldn't manage without me."

"If you really think you need to, you could stay behind, and—"

"No," Carmelita says. "No. I'll go."

"We're all set!" The two look to the street below. Murray waves his arms. "Come on, Carmelita! Wait until you see this thing, it's awesome!"

Carmelita glances at Bentley. He gives her a thumbs up.

After a moment, she returns it, then jumps off the roof and follows Murray.

With the flash of a LOADING screen, she's in the sewer. And Carmelita has to stop and stare. "Okay, I wasn't expecting that," she admits after a moment.

"Isn't it awesome?" Murray asks. "Otto invented it!"

Carmelita nods, still staring. Because what she's looking at is a speedboat. A motor boat. In sixty years or so, Sly Cooper will find it in the Cooper Vault, and crawl underneath it to defend himself against Dr. M's death laser. But right now it sits low in the murky water, propellers idle, in absolute pristine condition, blue and yellow and beautiful. Just waiting for someone to drive it.

And it won't be Murray.

Murray holds the boat so Carmelita can climb in, then jumps in himself. The cabin is surprisingly spacious, though it doesn't have enough chairs. "Please take the seat next to the door," Otto says to Carmelita. "We're about ready to float."

Carmelita's groan can be heard outside the boat. Which, apparently, is what we're playing as. Well... logically, it's Otto driving the boat, but still.

"Before we go deep into this sewer, let us practice our... spelunking skills. Carmelita, you can fire with the R1 button. Could you please destroy those stalactites blocking our way? We'll be able to move out after they spellunk into the water."

Carmelita audibly growls, but she gets the job done. Her shock bolts seem to be coming from one of the speedboat's windows.

"Excellent. I can control our speed with the X button, and turn with the joystick."

"Why did you write the letter X on that button, anyway?" asks Murray. "You didn't label most of the others."

"Because X marks the spot, of course."

Carmelita groans louder, and the boat begins to move.

Play goes in a rather predictable manner here. There are obstacles to dodge, things that can't be shot: rocks, mostly, but occasionally whirlpools and currents as well. Mines can be shot, and shooting also gets rid of low-clinging stalactites, making them plunge into the water ahead with harmless spelunking noises. More interesting are the red catapult traps that have to be deactivated with shooting, only to reactivate themselves after ten seconds or so, requiring repeated shots while navigating past some obstacles; just as irritating are the blue catapults, which turn off with one shot but can be turned back on if hit a second time, and always seem to be next to other catapults. And the whole thing is made infinitely more annoying by the number of places where the ceiling has been shored up or patched, cracked walls or wooden pillars clearly advertising that, if they're hit, the consequences will be... unpleasant.

Bentley was right: if Carmelita wasn't such a good shot, they'd never make it through. But, after an interminable age, they emerge into a wide, dank cave, the base of the tower before them.

This close, they can see that the outside is styled differently from the others, yet again. It looms tall and imposing, like each of them have, but with its own unique flair. This one features a thin ramp around the outside, just big enough to stand on, spiraling up steeply enough that even Carmelita couldn't possibly jump from one level to the next. Walls and other obstacles stick out from it at regular intervals, preventing anyone from climbing.

"This looks like a job for..." Carmelita says, looking at Murray, waiting for him to finish.

"A job for THE MURRAY." Murray pounds one fist into the other hand and starts his way up.

Otto and Carmelita follow in Murray's wake, but this is clearly Murray Time. The obstacles in his path fall before his mighty blows; some fall to pieces, leaving chunks behind he can pick up and throw at sturdier obstacles. The higher he gets, the tougher the items are. By the time he's near the tower's central landing, about halfway up, he has to resort to special moves he's learned, like the breaking blow. No chance of getting past the landing, though; the way beyond is blocked by swinging axes, moving far too fast for anyone to get past.

Murray's panting for breath by the time he reaches the landing itself. "Nice job, Murray," Carmelita says.

"Sure... The Murray... reigns supreme," he gasps out. He pulls a piece of pizza from nowhere and scarfs it down, then wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. "Is the door open?"

"No, but it does not seem to have a keyhole," Otto replies.

"And it's not an electric lock, either," says Carmelita. "Think you can pry the door open? Then we can get a look inside."

Can The Murray pry open a door? Of course he can! He can do it in a matter of herghk... oof... uh... whew. No problem, just a few grunts of effort.

Until they're swarmed by dozens of mechanical foxes the size of Murray's fist. They're fast and they bite, and the next few minutes devolve into a frenzy of swatting them off. When they're finished, they can look around properly.

This tower resembles Rajan's: halfway across the landing is a wall, dividing the area in half. Unlike Rajan's tower, though, this wall is clear: something much stronger than glass, but just as see-through. On the other side is a lab, the likes of which Bentley has only... well, okay, if he'd dreamed about it he would've made it already, but it's pretty darn close.

The way further down is secured with a hatch and a trapdoor, secure enough only bombs could get through. The way into the lab is that way as well; there's no obvious way to continue upwards. But near the glass wall is one curious thing: a protective laser barrier.

In the center of the laser barrier is what appears to be a computer chip. A big one.

"We may as well turn back," says Carmelita. "We can't do anything without bombs."

"But we have made some valuable discoveries." Otto grabs both the others and pulls them into a group hug, to Murray's joy and Carmelita's comical shock. "Let's celebrate on our return. It's all smooth sailing from here!"

JOB COMPLETE

Carmelita and Murray look at each other, then book it back to the speedboat without waiting to see if Otto's following.

Available Jobs

A Wee Bit O' Sabotage

Author's Notes

Holy crud, people, it was September for TWO DAYS and every chapter got at least one view for the month already. Who just read (or reread) this whole thing?! That's a freaking undertaking, have you seen how long this is? I'm honored and flattered (and flabbergasted) you're all enjoying this so much. Thank you.