KonoSuba: A Tale of this Beautiful World Vol2

by Dknightodin

The second volume of the series.

3. Chapter 2: The Royal Provision

Chapter 2: The Royal Provision

Part 1

We left the guild hall and finally arrived at the Royal Smith's. As we entered, Megumin and Yunyun instantly gravitated to the magic tools displayed about the shop. The store attendant approached me.

"Can I do anything for you, sir?" She asked, bowing slightly.

"I'd like to see Master Holt," I replied.

She showed some mild surprise at the request but bowed once more, and then disappeared down into the forge below. While the receptionist was gone, I walked over to Megumin and Yunyun.

"You guys doing some window shopping?" I said.

Megumin pointed excitedly at one of the staves. "Look, Kazuma, even at a distance I can tell that staff is incredible."

"Oh," I said, crossing my arms, "something wrong with the one you got?"

"N-No," Megumin stammered, "just…was pointing it out."

I looked up at the cost of the staff in question. "Yeesh…550 million eris…and it's not even a custom piece."

"These are all amazing, Megumin," Yunyun said, "but they're way too expensive."

"Umu, but what do you expect; they're made by the Royal Smith."

"These pieces are not," the attendant said, startling us. "All of these are made by artisan's employed by Master Holt; the Master only creates items on-demand." She then turned to me and gave a minor bow. "My good sir, Master Holt will see you; please, follow me."

We followed the attendant into the familiar paths of the underground workshop. The thunderous blows and loud noises that echoed through the passageways scared Chomusuke, causing her to hide under Megumin's hat. Finally, after walking through the workplace (and donning the safety gear) we made it to the private forge. Stood speaking with the Royal Smith was a well-acquainted knight in a white suit.

"Master Holt, the guests are here," the attendant announced.

Looking out towards her, he replied, "Ah, thank you; you can go, Gren."

She bowed deeply and then walked off.

Claire turned around; for a moment she was surprised. "Kazuma-dono, Megumin-dono…Yunyun-san, what are you all doing here?"

"I came to speak with Master Holt," I said.

"Ah," Holt said, "to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Well, I came to ask you for a personal request."

"Oh?"

Claire cleared her throat loudly. "Master Holt, about the issue, the crown is ready to dispatch imperial knights to recover the item."

"Hm, really?" Holt said, looking between me and Claire. "Claire-dono, I have a better idea, one that'll kill two birds with one stone."

She raised a brow. "Go on."

"Right now, we're in the presence of the adventurer who defeated the Demon Army in its entirety, why not ask him for help?"

Claire looked at me, and then back at Holt. "This is really a matter for the knights, however…" she turned back to me. "Kazuma-dono, would you mind?"

"Of course I would; I don't even know what you're talking about. I didn't come here to get roped into another quest."

Megumin elbowed me. "What he means is we're willing to listen to the request."

I frowned, nursing the spot where Megumin elbowed. "Sure, I guess."

Claire sighed. "Well approximately two days ago we received word that a special shipment of ores on its way back to the capital was intercepted; this isn't really noteworthy—attacks like these are pretty common—what was noteworthy was the fact that the patrol group was nearly wiped out. A small group of knights managed to make it back with some of the peddlers and get this news out to us."

"Claire-dono, won't you tell him about what made this shipment particularly special."

She appeared to be contemplating the request, but after a bit of time, she sighed. "The shipment contained a legendary core of Coronatite."

"Coronatite?!" we all yelled.

I continued. "I thought there was only one?"

"Coronatite is just extremely rare; as such, every piece found is essential."

"And let me guess, you want me to go get it?"

"I don't want you to do anything, Kazuma-dono—in fact, if you decline to this request, I'll feel much better."

"Kazuma-dono," Holt said, "you said you came here with a personal request for me, correct?"

"You're gonna ask me if I can do this in exchange?" I queried.

"You catch on quick. As you know there only two ways I work, by royal passes and personal fulfilments; so, what do you say?"

"I mean…*sigh* I don't really have a good experience with Coronatite."

"Hmm, tell you what, since this is the first time I'm asking you to do something for me, if you do get this done for me, I'll fulfill your request and I'll make something for you."

Even Claire was shocked at this deal.

I rubbed my chin in contemplation. "You just want the Coronatite recovered, right?"

Claire sighed. "Ideally, the recovery of the entire shipment is what's wanted; however, barring that, yes, the Coronatite takes priority."

"Hm." I turned to Holt. "What's this gotta do with you; is it because it involves metals?"

Holt laughed lightly. "Kazuma-dono, if you didn't know, Coronatite is a workable material; however, it's extremely difficult to work with."

"And you're the only one who can, right?"

He nodded.

I shifted my attention to Claire. "What's it being used for, the Coronatite?"

She crossed her arms and frowned. "You're being awfully impertinent; what the crown is using the Coronatite is of no concern to you."

With a heavy sigh, I continued. "Alright, so let me get this straight; you want me to recover the Coronatite and, if possible, the rest of the shipment of ores?"

Claire nodded. "In addition—if you can, find out what happened to the other patrolmen and who did this; there aren't very many people who would boldly attack a royal convoy."

"I thought you said it was common."

"The attacks are; shipments are often preyed upon by bandits, however, it should go without saying, royal convoys being attacked are quite rare."

Megumin interjected. "Whoever is behind this attack must've been someone who knew about the shipment though; how else would they have known it was carrying Coronatite?"

Claire's eyes widened; it appeared she hadn't thought about that. "This…" She huffed. "If you're right, Megumin-dono, then it complicates matters." Claire closed her eyes in thought; after a moment, she opened them again. "Yes…with the revelation that Megumin-dono proposed, it could mean the perpetrator might have close ties to the kingdom—or at the very least has some informant; as such, sending an imperial detachment might just cause them to slip away.

"Kazuma-dono," she said, bowing her head ever so slightly, "if you could undertake this quest the kingdom would be indebted to you once more."

I sighed as I scratched my head. Crossing my arms, I turned to Megumin. "Well?"

"Hm, well what?" She queried.

"What do you think; this as much your decision as it is mine."

She stared at me with brief surprise; her face reddened. "I-I think we should accept," She replied, clutching her staff closely to her chest.

I turned to Claire. "Well there ya go; I guess I accept."

She smiled faintly and then looked up at me. "Very well, Kazuma-dono; I look forward to hearing of your success."

"Umu."

Claire turned to Holt. "Master Holt," She said with a slight bow; Claire took once last glance at us and then left.

After she did, Holt shifted his attention to us, namely me. "Well, Kazuma-dono, what's this request you have for me?"

"Ah, well, recently I've acquired the Smithing class; I was wondering if you could teach me the ins and outs."

Holt smiled. "You're aiming to become a smith?"

"Eh, well, on my off time I do a bit of it."

"I see. Well, I have no problem teaching you; however, Kazuma-dono, my tuition comes high."

"Money isn't really an issue."

"I don't speak of money; to be a good smith, you've got to be willing to get your hands dirty—I know what you're thinking, quite ironic for me to say such things after such a difficult quest was offloaded onto you, right? Truth be told, I wanted to go get the ore shipment myself, but—"

"You're too valuable," I finished.

He nodded. "Complete the tasks I ask of you and in return I'll teach you; I might even throw in a couple of rewards if you manage to do some particularly difficult ones."

"This sounds a lot like some supplementary quest system in RPGs…and just as annoying; still, if I can get someone like the Royal Smith to teach me I should be able to increase my proficiency quickly—maybe even close the large level gap between me and the others. Umu, ok, sounds good."

"Great," he said with a smile. "Now, on to other matters; how are the rings?"

Me and Megumin looked at each other and then our wedding bands. I spoke. "Hey," I said, turning to him, "did you make it so you could hear each other's thoughts and heartbeat?"

Holt smirked. "I see you found out; hearts and minds as one," he remarked. "Anyways, I ask of the manatite coil inside; there are no issues with it, correct?"

"Ah, well, no; none as far as I can see."

"Good, I was slightly worried; liquid manatite is somewhat problematic to work with."

"Liquid manatite?" Yunyun queried.

"Yes, I used it in the construction of the rings; it's what causes the ethereal bands. You see, liquid manatite tends to bleed off mana rather quickly; I gave it a semi-solid core in order to prevent it from breaking down completely. I was sort of worried something might've gone awry."

"Well, no," I answered, "nothing of the sort, yet."

"Should anything happen, please don't hesitate to pay me a visit."

"If you don't mind me asking, what can happen?"

"Ah, I see you're concerned; worry not, Kazuma-dono, it isn't dangerous. Simply put, the worst that can happen is the core itself will simply break; it'll render the function of the ring inoperable."

"I'm actually interested in how you managed to make such an odd function," Megumin said. "How are you able to make the rings allow us to hear our thoughts and hearts?"

"One of the side effects of absorbing green manatite is that it tends to have some mild hallucinogenic effects; I bound traces of Kazuma-dono's manatite core to your own. Put quite simply, this results in the aforementioned effect as well as the blooming roses when the rings are touching."

"I see."

Holt then stared at Megumin; he rubbed his chin curiously. Then he glanced over at me. "I've been meaning to ask," he said, "those weapons were made by a Crimson Demon, right?"

Me and Megumin traded looks. I nodded. "Why?"

"They're well-made; may I take a look at them?"

"Uh, sure."

Megumin and I handed over our weapons; Holt inspected them inquisitively. "Umu, quite good…and interesting." He handed them back. "They're unfinished," He said.

"Huh? I get my sword is—the oji-san said as much, but Megumin's staff should be complete."

"It is, for the most part; however, I feel both your weapons are missing some rather crucial elements. Anyways, I thought I should just let you know."

"Uhhh, right."

"Right then, I wish you good luck, Kazuma-dono, Megumin-dono and…Yunyun-san."

Afterwards, we left the Royal Smith's. As we wandered with no particular destination, I remembered about the new shop Vanir mentioned; I withdrew the small slip of paper.

"Hey," I said, while walking, "we should head over to Wiz and Vanir's new shop."

"Ah, that's right," Megumin replied with a smile, "that little penguin mascot is running it; Zereschrute, was his name, right?"

"Umu," I replied with a nod.

"Zereschrute-san?" Yunyun said.

Megumin glanced at her. "Umu, Vanir sent him to manage the store here. At the very least, it'll stop Aqua from purifying him every time they meet; I kinda feel bad for him."

I interrupted. "Trust me, if you saw what was under that suit of his, that'll be the last thought on your mind."

We continued walking; Megumin glanced up at me irregularly.

"What is it?" I finally asked.

"Huh? Oh, umu," she replied, shaking her head, "it's nothing."

"What are you talking about; something's obviously on your mind."

Megumin wrapped her arms around my own and rested her head on me; she smiled meekly. "Nothing."

I sighed, glancing over at Yunyun; she was playing with Chomusuke who seemed rather bothered by it.

After a couple of moments, Megumin spoke once more. "We can…go visit Iris if you'd like." I felt her fidget slightly.

I snorted and then smiled. "This your attempt at a reward; what for?"

She pressed herself closer, and then looked down; Megumin responded timidly. "I don't wanna be selfish…not too much."

"This girl…" I glanced at her, and then looked forward. "Hm, maybe later; there's still a lot of time left in the day…besides…I got a pretty cute girl hanging off my arm already."

I could feel her grip tighten a bit as she snuggled closer to me. "What a girl," I thought.

Several minutes later, we finally arrived at our destination. The shop here was larger than the one in Axel and appeared to be a tad more flamboyant in its appearance; although, saying that, it was still modest by capital standards.

"I think this is it," I said, looking at the slip of paper. I looked up and noticed the large sign above the store.

"Devilishly Good Magic Shop," Yunyun read.

"Well…I don't think anyone's keeping track of good naming conventions…"

We stepped into the store.

"Welcome custom—oh wait," he said, placing a flipper to his beak; a moment later he pointed at us in shock. "Gah, it's you guys!"

"Hey!" Megumin shouted, "Is that anyway to treat new and valued customers?"

"Hello, Zereschrute-san," Yunyun said, waving timidly.

"Yo," I said, "Vanir said to stop by the shop."

"Vanir-sama…I see. The shipment of manatite hasn't come in; there are no proceeds for you to acquire as of yet."

"Oi, I didn't come here for the takings; I wanted to see if there was anything worth buying."

"Ah, you're actually buying something?" The penguin flapped its stubby flippers happily. "Well then, I'll have you know we have a wide number of things on sale, and good things—not like the rather useless items Wiz-san gets."

"Oh, an actual magic shop then?"

Zereschrute nodded proudly.

For the next couple of minutes all of us scoured the store, browsing the impressive collection of items on display.

"Hey, Zereschrute," I said as I continued looking, "how'd you manage to get these items; Vanir always seems to have some issues acquiring anything worthwhile."

"I'm sure Vanir-sama would be rather disappointed to hear you say that. Most of the items came from my personal collections."

"Oh? Explains the bunch of brutal-looking devices you got."

The penguin crossed its flippers proudly. "Of course; I am the Lord of Brutality."

"Don't you mean former?"

"How dare you; I'm still renown as such. Just because I was…forced to retreat, doesn't mean I lost that title."

"Hey, Zereschrute-san, what's this?" Yunyun said, holding up an odd device.

"Ah." Zereschrute smirked, placing a flipper to his chin. "A rather beloved piece; it's called a 'Mana Siphon'."

"Mana Siphon?" We all stared the item in question.

"Umu, you place the end of the device on a spot on someone's body, press the button, then the needle injects itself into the victim and begins to siphon away their mana."

"So it's like the item version of Drain Touch?" I posed.

"Ah, that's not a bad way to put it; although, this is designed to cause as much pain as possible."

Yunyun stared nervously at the contraption.

"Umu, once the injection is complete, a wire filament is inserted into the body causing—"

"Oi, why're you selling such dangerous stuff?!" I shouted in disbelief.

A trembling Yunyun quickly placed the item back where she found it.

"I'll have you know, most of my stock has been flying off the shelves."

"Says a lot about the people in the capital," Megumin commented. "A lot of this stuff isn't even cheap."

"Of course not!" Zereschrute snapped. "Why would I sell my personal collection for cheap? Anyhow, are you all going to buy something or not?"

I spoke. "Well, I was wondering if you had anything that can withstand high temperatures?"

"Oh? I have lots of items that cause burns, but I'm not sure if I have anything that prevents them; let me check."

Zereschrute waddled over to the shop counter and opened up a book. "Let me see," he said, flipping through its pages. "…ah, found something; Gloves of Frostbite."

"…well it sounds like it'll do the trick."

"Alright, let me just get them for you."

The unassuming-looking devil disappeared behind the shop's backroom; a couple minutes later, he returned with the item in question.

"The gloves are quite large," he said. "They're made from the hands of an ice troll I once brutalized."

"Wait, like actual hands?"

"Of course actual hands; what did you think?!"

"I don't know, that maybe you weren't selling oddities—why is this whole shop filled with questionable items?"

"Typical, most humans just don't seem to understand good taste."

I stared at the penguin blankly. "Tell me the insides of those gloves are at least in…wearable condition."

"The gloves were made for the hands of a human; worry not, I trimmed the excess."

"Ugh, I'm having second thoughts."

"A-At least try them on!" Zereschrute said with a hint of desperation.

I took the gloves and looked inside; they appeared to be of normal construction, though the outside very much resembled the hands of a large icy creature.

"Well, try them on," the penguin devil urged.

Reluctantly, I obliged; to my surprise (and relief) the insides were well-insulated and quite comfortable.

"Hey, these are not bad."

Zereschrute flapped his flippers happily. He then gave me a pompous look. "I told you, I only sell the best items in this shop."

"How much for these?" I asked.

He paused and then gave it serious thought. "500,000—"

"Nope—"

"The gloves are made from an ice troll; when you've beaten an ice troll come back and tell me these aren't worth that much—"

"I've beaten the Demon King."

Zereschrute coughed; Megumin did as well shortly after. I looked back and frowned.

The little penguin looked defeated by my counter argument and sighed. "Very well…400,000."

I was still wholly unsatisfied by the price, but I didn't feel like fleecing this devil when I had more than enough cash.

"Take it from the proceeds," I told him, stashing the gloves in my satchel.

"Ah—very well…" he said, with some hesitance. "P-Please come again!" He shouted as we left the shop.

"Well, with that done, what do you say we go pay Iris a visit?"

"Iris-chan?" Yunyun said. "I'm pretty sure she's busy."

"She's never busy when it comes to Kazuma," Megumin replied; there was a morsel of spite in her response.

As we then walked towards the palace, Megumin looked over at me and smirked.

"What?" I said, her smile making me somewhat nervous.

"You defeated the Demon King, huh?"

"Oi."

She smiled.

Yunyun stared at both of us with some perplexity; however, we paid it no mind.

A couple minutes later, we arrived at the palace. Normally, when we used to arrive, we'd be escorted inside after being verified; however, due to my ascent to nobility and consequent status, these steps were abolished; I was free to enter the palace grounds as I saw fit.

"Iris-chan," I said, knocking on her bedroom door.

I could hear hurried footsteps followed by Rain yelling desperately. The door swung open and the small princess of Belzerg was standing with a beaming smile on her face.

"Onii-sama!"

"Iris-sama," Rain interrupted, "please remember you still have lessons." She walked over. "I wish you would've told us you were coming, Kazuma-dono."

"Sorry, I was around so I thought I should visit."

"Megumin-nee, Yunyun-chan, a pleasure to see you both," Iris said, pulling all of us in. "Please, have a seat."

"Iris-sama!" Rain said with a more concerned tone. "Your lessons."

"Sorry, Rain-chan, can you please postpone them for a bit?"

"Hime-sama, you know—"

"Please, Rain," Iris said with a pleading face, "you know it isn't very often I get to see Onii-sama and the others."

She sighed heavily. "Alright…but we will resume them after they leave; try not to take too long or you'll be having your lessons before bed." Rain turned to me and shook her head. "Please message ahead when you're coming around Kazuma-dono; it gets really difficult to get anything done with Iris-sama whenever you're involved."

Megumin replied. "Don't worry, if I'm around I'll be sure to get the message out."

"Megumin-dono, don't think I've forgotten about your 'adventures' with Iris-sama."

She instantly looked nervously at the ground.

Rain turned to Iris and bowed. "Iris-sama, I'll be back later." She then turned to Megumin who was still looking down in embarrassment. "Megumin-dono, I leave Kazuma-dono to you; please watch him."

Megumin instantly looked up and gave a stern nod. "You can leave that to me."

"Oi, you don't have to look after me like I'm sort of miscreant."

Rain, Megumin and Yunyun all stared at me blankly; under their withering gazes my will buckled.

"H-Hey, I'm not…"

After Rain left, we all went out to the veranda; as per usual, Iris asked her attendants to bring us some food while we sat and chatted.

"So, how's everything going between you two?" She asked with an interested smile.

Me and Megumin looked at each other, and then back at Iris. "Everything is pretty much the same," Megumin answered.

"Really?" she replied; there was a mixture of surprise and disappointment in her voice. She then turned to Yunyun. "How about you, Yunyun-chan; how's the Crimson Village?"

"Everything is fine at the village, Iris-sa—chan."

"Hey, Iris," I said, interrupting the flow, "I heard you were involved with the land purchase Megumin made."

She turned back excitedly. "Ah yes, the land purchase. I was quite surprised to hear Megumin-nee wanted to purchase the Demon Lord's castle."

"Wait, the castle—not the land?" I queried, becoming somewhat nervous.

"Umu."

I glanced over at Megumin who was now shaking with a worried expression on her face.

Iris continued. "Luckily, I was with the representative when Megumin-nee was making the purchase; I added the area around the castle to be bought as well."

"Wait a minute, was she really gonna purchase just the castle, why?! Oi," I said, staring indignantly at Megumin, "you never said anything about this."

Megumin lowered her posture in uneasiness, her eyes darting away from mine. "I-I thought it wasn't important." My frown deepened. "I-I mean the important stuff was the fact that we got the land, r-right?"

"Oi," I said menacingly, my face mere centimeters from her own, "the details are important."

She nodded fervently; the nervousness she felt coercing her to do so. I sat back and shifted my attention back to Iris. "Thanks, Iris-chan."

"Umu, not a problem, Onii-sama; I'm here to support you in any way I can."

"Ah, I'm glad to see someone is."

Megumin flinched at my offhanded remark.

"By the way, Onii-sama, I've heard you were to take the mission concerning the missing ores."

"The missing Coronatite you mean."

"Yes; do you need anything from me? Since this is a royal provision I'd like to offer as much help as possible."

"No, it's fine Iris-chan; we're already set to go. That being said, I was quite curious as to what the Coronatite was being used for."

Iris gave a furtive smile; Megumin quickly stiffened in response, her expression growing equally stern. I looked between the two of them; something was going on with these two, I could tell.

Part 2

Shortly after Iris gave her response and the food came, we left; though I wanted to stay longer, I felt uncomfortable with the tension in the air.

"I can't believe she said it was a secret," Megumin said. "Especially to you."

I glanced out the corner of my eye. "…oi, what's going on between you and Iris?"

Megumin tensed up at my questioning; she gripped her staff tightly, and then let out a deep breath.

"There's something going on between Megumin and Iris-chan?" Yunyun queried.

"There's nothing," She answered curtly.

"…really, there's nothing?" I posed; my brow raised in doubt.

Megumin looked down as she walked; she appeared to be contemplating an answer. "If I'm honest," she said, "I feel…threatened by her."

"Pfft, I should've known."

"Threatened, how?" Yunyun asked.

"It's not in the way you think, Kazuma," she replied. "I feel like…Iris is hiding something."

"Iris? The Princess of Belzerg, Iris? The loveable little sister of mine who could do no harm, Iris? Listen, true she just said the reason for the Coronatite was a secret, but that's to be expected; there's some things even she can't tell me."

"And what would require being so secretive? Think about the last time Coronatite was used and what it was—"

"Whoa," I said, stopping abruptly. "You aren't suggesting that Iris-chan is building a weapon of mass destruction; even that line of reasoning is off for someone like you."

"Like me, what's that supposed to mean?!"

"Look, Megumin, we can't jump to such conclusions; besides, you of all people should know how OP Iris-chan is already; there'd be no need for a weapon like that to exist—no, in fact, I'm sure the reason for the Coronatite is something more benign."

Megumin relaxed upon hearing my explanation; she appeared to be somewhat relieved. "Hopefully you're right, Kazuma…I do like Iris; I'm just…sort of wary of her ever since the ceremony."

I sighed deeply, and then smiled. "Why worry about it; if something bad happens we'll deal with it, right?"

Megumin smiled weakly. "Umu."

"Or are you worried that your Explosion magic might not be enough to stop it?"

"Of course not!" Megumin shouted tenaciously; all traces of her anxiety gone. She grinned. "Especially now that I've acquired new Explosion magic; there's no way I could lose."

I smiled; that was more like the little explosive mage I came to love.

Afterwards, Yunyun teleported us back to Axel.

"Megumin," She said as we began to walk back to the mansion.

Megumin turned around. "What is it, Yunyun?"

"Make sure you visit your parents and Komekko; they haven't seen you since the wedding."

Megumin looked genuinely thankful for the reminder. "Ah, right, thanks, Yunyun; I'll see about visiting them soon."

With our goodbyes said, me and Megumin continued to the mansion. When we arrived, Aqua and Irene were out front tending to the garden.

"Ah, where were you two?" Aqua said somewhat aggressively.

"We went to the capital," Megumin replied.

"I'm surprised the maid didn't tell you," I added.

Irene was unfazed by remark. "Ah, I see you've returned, Megumin-sama; should I run a bath for you?"

"Uh, sure, thank you, Irene."

She bowed and headed back into the house.

"What'd you guys go to the capital for?" Aqua continued.

"I went to see Master Holt," I replied.

"Who?"

"Ah, that's right, you don't actually know him; he's the Royal Smith."

"Oh, the guy who made your rings, right?"

"Umu."

"What'd you go and see him for?"

"Mostly for some help. Oh, by the way, we have a quest we gotta do."

"Huh, what are you talking about, Kazuma?" Aqua stopped tending to the garden and turned around.

Megumin interjected. "It's a special request from the royal family."

I elaborated. "We need to go investigate what happened to some patrol group that got jumped while they were escorting a shipment of some ores."

"Sounds kinda boring."

"Let's hope it is; if it's something simple we can finish it quickly and head back."

"But you didn't tell her about the real reason we're headed out there," Megumin said.

"It's best if I don't."

"Wait," Aqua said sort of anxiously, "what reason—what's going on? Kazuma!"

I waved her off and headed inside; Chomusuke (who was hidden under Megumin's hat this entire time) popped out and followed me in.

"Kazuma." It was Darkness.

"Yes, I'm Kazuma."

"I was slightly worried when I didn't see you; luckily, Irene told me you headed to the capital with Megumin."

"Of course she did; Aqua is gonna be upset when I tell her Irene didn't bother to inform her."

"Try not to get her to add more reasons to dislike you, Kazuma."

"She should try having less reasons for me to dislike her, not the other way around!"

"Ahem."

"*sigh* whatever, just get some stuff ready, we're headed on another adventure."

"Oh, so soon?" Darkness said, mildly surprised. She smiled, placing her hands on her hips. "I thought you said we weren't—"

"Yeah, yeah, I know; it just kinda fell onto my lap."

Darkness crossed her arms. "What's the quest for?"

"We just need to investigate the disappearance of some patrols and recover some missing ores."

She placed a hand on her chin. "Patrols…sounds like that would be under the purview of the imperial knights."

"It is, but for reasons I'm too tired to get into we were offered the job instead."

"I see. Well, I've no issue with this; my muscles were starting to get stiff from little use."

Aqua rushed in with Megumin in tow. "What's this about Coronatite?!" She shrieked.

"Coronatite?" Darkness said, looking at me.

I frowned at Megumin, who instinctively looked away. "Yeah, it has something to do with Coronatite."

Darkness grasped my shoulder. "Kazuma," she said with a solemn stare; her grip tightened, "we must absolutely go on this quest."

"Ah, yeah—ow, your hands—ow, goddammit, Darkness!" I pried it loose from my shoulder, massaging the spot. "It's a royal provision; I think it'd be bad form if we refused."

"Am I the only one who's worried about this?!" Aqua said anxiously. "It's the same thing that powered the Destroyer, right; the same thing that was gonna explode?!"

"Aqua, we got a walking nuke with us the entire time; you really think I'm gonna be afraid of explosions now?"

"Maybe not you guys, but I certainly don't want to be cooked alive by this thing going nuclear."

"Let me make this clear, neither do I; with that said, I think we'll do what we can. According to Megumin, there's a good chance this was done with the help of an inside man; we should at least do our part in investigating it."

"Since when are you so gung-ho about taking such difficult requests—what did the princess offer you?!"

"Oi, I take offence to that. I'm an adventurer, a hero, and a noble of this kingdom; I'm not about to let some sly bastard endanger that after I worked so hard to get here!"

"Don't worry, Aqua," Megumin reassured, "if worse comes to worst, I'll just hit the Coronatite with my new Ice Explosion and neutralize it."

"Let's hope it just doesn't come to that; I don't wanna have to think that solving this thing would require another explosion."

"Heh," Megumin grinned, striking a pose, "you should know, Kazuma, bringing along the Master of Explosions is—"

"A recipe for disaster." I finished, sighing heavily afterwards. "If you're knowledge on magical items wasn't so useful, I'd really be contemplating on bringing you along."

"Ah—as if; I'll go even if you tell me not too!"

"Oh, you wanna test that theory?" I said, stepping towards her.

Megumin stepped back nervously. "I-I see, you're coming close—"

"I can't drain you if I don't."

"A-Ah—ok, ok…you win."

"Kazuma," Darkness said enthusiastically, "am-am I useful for this quest?! I-I don't care what you say, I'm coming along as well—perhaps you need to drain me too—"

"No, we'll definitely need you as a pack mule; I'm sure the ores will be heavy."

"Kyuuuu!" Darkness squirmed excitedly.

"Anyways, just get packed; we'll head out tomorrow morning."

After this discussion, Megumin and Aqua went to take a bath while I prepped dinner. While I was reluctant to have Irene help, I conceded once she told me she would handle the desserts; there was also the benefit of watching her; I could make sure there was nothing malicious being done to the food.

As we cooked, Irene looked over at me; the pastries she was making were currently baking so she had nothing better to do.

"Oi, could you stop staring; it's ruining my concentration."

"My apologies, Satou-sama; I forget, having a woman stare at you so purposefully fills you with excitement."

"I don't have a problem with women staring at me—just you, and besides, wouldn't any guy feel somewhat tense if a woman stared so intently?"

"I'm simply watching to make sure the Master doesn't mess up."

"I'm gonna mess up if you keep watching—or maybe that's what you want."

Irene looked away; a couple minutes later, she looked back at me.

"Again?"

"Just making sure everything is fine with the food."

"It's not my first time, you know."

"Satou-sama, please, I don't wish to hear about your experiences."

"I'm talking about the food."

"Of course you are; any other line of reasoning would imply the Master had any experience."

My brow twitched and the oven bell dinged. Irene pulled out the pastries and quickly set them on a tray.

"I'll prepare the table," she said, walking out with the tray of pastries.

"Gah, that woman is nothing but insufferable…"

Despite the frustrating experience in the kitchen, I managed to finish cooking. Darkness was already waiting in the dining room; she and Irene were having a chat, eventually, the other two arrived.

"What are we having tonight?" Megumin smiled as she took a seat beside me.

Irene replied. "Satou-sama has managed to cook up a meat stew, accompanying it will be strawberry-filled pastries."

"Oh, sounds good," Aqua remarked.

"Why don't you eat with us, Irene?" Darkness said.

"No, I couldn't, Lalatina-sama; a servant's place is not at the table of their hosts."

"…eat with us," I grumbled.

Irene looked at me, though her face remained expressionless. "If the Master insists."

"I do, so sit; as much as you're a pain in the ass, you're still part of this house."

Irene sat. After a couple of moments, she looked at me. "Thank you," She said with a slight bow of her head.

"Sure."

For the next hour or so, we all exchanged stories; at first, it was about the day, then it became about our past experiences. The maid listened, but she shared few details of her own. By the time we were done, everyone was full and satisfied. We each headed to our rooms to turn in for the night; well, most of us…

"Kazuma," Megumin said, knocking on my door.

"Come in," I answered; she did. In her hand she had a notebook and pencil. "What's up?" I asked.

Megumin showed me the items in her hand.

"What about 'em?"

Megumin climbed into my bed and sat next to me. "The lessons," she said. "Remember, you said you were gonna teach me your home language."

"Ah right," I said, sitting up.

Even though I agreed to teach Megumin Japanese, I had little idea where to begin. When it came to the understanding both languages, I knew them fluently; however, this was obviously due to the effects of being sent to this world; it wasn't like I fundamentally understood this world's language and how it actually compared to something like Japanese. The thought process behind each language was automatic for me.

Megumin tugged on my sleeve. "Explosion," she said, "teach me how to say 'Explosion'."

"Right, of course she would choose something like that…" I smiled. "Bakuhatsu or Bakuretsu are typically interchangeable. Mahou means magic."

Megumin smiled tenderly. "Bakuhatsu…Bakuretsu mahou!" Once again she smiled, although this time with more vigor. "How do you say, 'I love'?"

"Heh, I love explosions, huh. Bakaretsu ga daisuki."

"Umu," Megumin said, shaking her head. "Not explosions. Kazuma, Kazuma ga daisuki."

It was wrong, or at least the way I think she meant to say it, but…

"Aishiteru, Megumin."

She looked at me in confusion.

"Means, I love you, Megumin."

She blushed and looked away coyly. "Aishiteru, Kazuma."

I scratched my head and smiled. "Japanese is contextual; there's quite a few ways to say things and the words you choose give it a different sort of…feeling. Just saying 'I love you' could be said in a few ways—obviously there are more commonly used ways to say things, but for the most part it's something you pick up with experience."

Megumin nodded; she was listening attentively.

"Here," I said, grabbing the pen and notebook from her. I opened it up to clean sheet of paper and began writing in kana.

Megumin watched with a mixture of awe and confusion as I wrote down the symbols of a few in hiragana.

"Wait!" she said, "Kazuma!"

"What?" I replied, slightly alarmed by her outburst.

"I've seen these kinds of symbols; they're like the ones in the village!"

"Umu."

"So…the landmarks…"

"Yeah, they're from Japan…or at the very least, probably made by someone from Japan."

"I see." Megumin went quiet at the thought.

"…you wanna continue?"

"Huh?" she said, looking back up at me. "Yes—of course, please."

Her eagerness made me smile. Suddenly she went quiet again, a solemn expression crept up on her face once more.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, uh, I remembered the other place I've seen these types of symbols."

I raised my brow. "Where?"

"When I had my awakening, these symbols flashed over my eyes."

"Huh, how?"

"I, I don't know; all I remember was getting mad and then the symbols flashed over my eyes, a couple seconds later I 'awakened'."

"That sounds odd as hell; why would she see kanji? I mean I get that some Japanese dude genetically modified them, but something like that would be strange even given that sort of background. Oi, Megumin, you sure Crimson Demons are genetically modified humans, you guys aren't like androids or something, right?"

"Huh, androids?"

"Like human robots; they look like humans but have robot parts."

"Umm, no, we're definitely human."

"How can you be sure?"

"Kazuma…just trust me; there're ways to verify this—and I have."

"You say that, but now I'm really curious."

"Well, for starters there've been some pretty gruesome accidents in the village's past; Crimson Demons who thought themselves stronger than they were have wandered into the forests only to be found mutilated. Once you see this, you know for a fact that we're not robots, we're…very human. And the second thing is robots wouldn't be able to use magic—at least I don't think so. Finally, robots can't produce offspring, right?"

"True; a robot wouldn't be able to—not even an android. Hell, at that point, it would be better to call them a cyborg, a human with cybernetic implants or robotic parts, rather than a robot with a human appearance…right? Well, I guess we'll find out someday."

Megumin looked away timidly, her eyes and ears growing bright red.

"Anyways," I said, "do you remember the symbols; if you do, we can decipher what it means."

She looked back at me. "Uhhh, no, sorry."

"Well, it's been a while so I can't really blame you."

For some odd reason, I found myself absorbed in teaching Megumin, Japanese. Maybe seeing something from back there brought me feelings of relief; relief that I still remembered it, that I still had some attachment to it. And while I've only been here for a little over two years, the amount of experiences I had here dwarfed any I had back in Japan; perhaps that's why I was so concerned I would forget. After several more hours of teaching, eventually, me and Megumin fell asleep.

-Next Morning

When I awoke, I found Megumin hugging the notebook close to her chest; she slept deeply; a small grin on her face as drool slowly meandered down the side of her cheek. Though we needed to get ready to depart, I let her sleep; waking her from such a state would make me feel somewhat bad.

"Kazuma," Darkness said, as I exited my room.

"Oh, morning, Darkness, what's up?"

"Everything is prepped to go."

"Good."

Darkness smiled. "We're finally going on another adventure; I'm excited, Kazuma."

"Oh, when aren't you?" She blushed slightly, and then frowned. "That aside, I just hope it isn't too much trouble; after all, the reason I'm holding off on fighting the other Demon Kings is so I can take some time to actually enjoy what this world has to offer."

"As much as I'd hate to shatter your preconceptions, Kazuma, I don't believe it will be; if it's a royal provision then it's classified as a high-level bounty."

"Yeah, I know, but I could always dream. Anyways…where's Aqua?"

"I think she's still asleep—I think Megumin is too."

"Umu, Megumin's sleeping in my room." Darkness made a surprised expression; she quickly suppressed it. "I'm gonna make breakfast; wake her, if she doesn't by the time I get done."

"S-Sure." As I went to walk away, Darkness grabbed my shoulder. "Kazuma," She said; there was an anxious look on her face.

I sighed. "I was just talking with her and we fell asleep."

Darkness loosened her grip slightly. "S-Sorry, I was just…" She looked down for a moment, then away, finally she let go of me.

Once again, I sighed. "Pull yourself together, Darkness; gonna need that rock-hard body of yours to not be distracted." I gave her a weak smile.

"R-Right," She replied, responding with a similar expression.

After I made breakfast, I came out of the kitchen to find the others already sitting at the table. Megumin had the notebook out; she appeared to be studying it.

"Hey, Megumin," Aqua said, "that's Japanese; why have something like that if you can't even read it?"

Megumin glanced up from the book. "Kazuma's teaching me," She replied as I placed the plates of food on the table.

"Oh, that true, Kazuma?" Aqua said, looking to me.

"Eh, yeah."

Darkness interjected. "I see, so that's what you two were doing." She looked at Megumin. "Can you read any of it?"

She nodded. "Just a bit; it's pretty confusing though."

"What's the point of teaching her Japanese though?" Aqua questioned. "It's not like she'll ever be able to visit Japan."

"She insisted," I answered as I sat down.

Aqua looked slightly worriedly to Megumin, then she smiled. "How cute, Megumin wants to learn Japanese; why?"

Megumin shifted her attention to Aqua. "Ah, I just wanted to know more about where Kazuma came from."

"Hmmm, I think it's quite romantic actually."

"Eh, I'm having second thoughts teaching her then," I interjected as I lazily sipped some water. "Hey, by the way, where's the maid?"

"Irene?"

Darkness responded. "She went out to get groceries; she should be back before we leave though."

"Ah, I see; at least she's making herself useful," I remarked.

"So, Megumin," Aqua continued, " what'd Kazuma teach you; I bet it was something lewd and disgusting."

"Oi."

Megumin smiled proudly. "Waga na wa Megumin, bakurestu mahou no tatsujin!"

"Ohhh," Aqua said with a smile growing, "that's not too bad; although I feel like the way you're saying it is for flair; especially the beginning part."

"Really?" I interrupted. "That's how I always heard her introduce herself."

"Ah, really," Aqua questioned, placing a finger on her chin, "so you hear everyone speaking in Japanese?"

I nodded.

"Really?" Megumin said with a slightly confused look. " So, even now you hear me speaking in Japanese?"

"Umu."

Darkness spoke. "How about literature; do you see it in your home language?"

"Eh, well, no," I replied, sitting back in thought. "I see it as is, but it's just automatically translated in my mind as Japanese."

"Hmm, seems like that's full fluency."

"I always thought it kinda strange; this world only seems to have one language."

"Umu." Megumin nodded.

Aqua elaborated. "As far as I know, the language is sort of derived from divine tongue; the mortal races were present towards the end of the primordial war and were taught language by some lingering angels."

"Hmm, interesting; still, wouldn't you see that kinda thing split into other dialects and eventually become their own languages?"

"Is that what happened in your world, Kazuma?" Megumin posed.

"Well...minus the angel part."

Aqua interjected. "To answer your question, Kazuma, the threat of the demons and their kin seems to have prevented other languages from forming, or rather, from the original from fracturing—that being said, the language spoken is almost completely different from godly tongue."

"Wait," Megumin said, "if you always hear us speaking Japanese; how do you hear me when I actually speak Japanese?"

I grinned. "Sounds like you're trying too hard to say something you don't actually know how to say; it's actually kinda cute."

Megumin looked away slightly; her ears and cheeks were tinged a mild hue of red.

"If that's the case," Darkness said, "wouldn't telling her exactly what you hear when she says something be the best way to teach her how to say said stuff?"

I raised my brow at the surprising suggestion. "Hmmm, I suppose it would; then again, she wouldn't actually learn anything from that; only how to say certain things."

"It's fine," Megumin interrupted, "I prefer the way you've been teaching me."

"Ah, well there you go, Darkness; she prefers learning from scratch."

"I thought as much; Megumin sure is tenacious."

"Of course I am, Darkness," Megumin remarked. "I don't undertake frivolous tasks; only those that are worth bearing in the first place."

"Well," Aqua said as she took a bite out of her buttered toast, "I don't really know who you'll be speaking to in Japanese besides me and Kazuma."

"That's irrelevant, Aqua—actually"—Megumin turned towards Darkness—"Darkness would you like me to teach you?"

"Huh—well, I don't mind."

I cut in. "Maybe learn the language first, then teach."

"Hai, Shishou!" Megumin shouted resolutely.

I grinned.

Part 3

As we made our way to the carriage station Darkness spoke. "So, where's this place supposed to be?" She asked.

"Hmm, well the quest scroll says it's on the path leading to Elroad," I replied, looking at the scroll in question.

"Seems kinda vague," Megumin remarked.

"Well, if they knew exactly where these bandits were, they wouldn't need us to investigate, right?"

"I suppose."

I looked over at Aqua who seemed to be happier than usual. "Oi, what's with you?"

"Hm, what do you mean?"

"You're smiling a bit more than normal…it's creeping me out."

Aqua frowned. "Humph, I just happen to be relieved that I don't have to leave Emperor Zell at Wiz's shop."

"Is that it; I thought you got some new bubbly or something."

"This is big news, Kazuma; no longer do I have to be worried about my little Zell's upbringing being corrupted by dark forces."

"Eh, I think his owner is probably worth more concern."

"Wha?!" Aqua crossed her arms angrily and pouted.

"Kazuma," Megumin said, "wouldn't it be better to teleport to the capital and take a convoy out from there?"

"Yeah," I replied, "it would, but I figured we'd wanna take in the sights; been a while since we traveled. Besides, we got a huge discount on the seats."

"Really, why?" Darkness queried.

I grinned. "The convoy leader said it's a gift on account of us being present to protect the convoy; nothing like the party who defeated the Demon King and his army being at hand."

Once we arrived, the convoy leader came to greet us personally.

"Ah, nice to see you've arrived; come, I've saved the best seats for you all."

Everyone smiled appreciatively and followed. Indeed, the coach that was reserved for us seemed to be one for nobles, V.I.P.s, or adventurers who could afford it; incidentally, we fit into all three of those categories.

Aqua laid out on the stretch of seat in front of me, while Megumin and Darkness sat beside me. After a couple minutes of waiting for other passengers to board the convoy, we were off.

"Oi, Aqua." Aqua, who had her arm shielding her eyes from the light pouring in from the outside, glanced at me. "Remember to get rid of your divine aura; the last thing I want is a repeat from when we went to Alcanretia."

"Don't worry, I remembered to the moment we got on."

"Good. Then, perhaps I can breathe a little easier."

Megumin spoke. "It's fine, Kazuma; if monsters appear, I'll handle it. And while I'm opposed to using my Explosion magic on small-fry, I'm quite anxious to try it out on actual mobs."

"Oi, if you use that new Explosion magic, you're liable to hurt someone or even worse."

"Don't worry, Kazuma, I'm a responsible adult; I'll make sure to use it far away from the convoy."

"How about you just don't use it?"

"Nonsense, Kazuma, I must; how else will I perfect it? This is part of my journey as a true explosion master."

I sighed. I had a bad feeling about this trip; perhaps it was simply better to teleport and avoid all the possible troubles of slow travel. Traveling to the capital would take roughly a week and a couple days and the more that I thought about it, the dumber I felt for not teleporting; but, perhaps my luck was starting to show, since we made it all the way to our destination without incident.

As we disembarked, the convoy leader came over to us. "Thank you for joining us; I'm sure there were no issues thanks to your presence."

To be honest, I was extremely surprised at the fact there were no encounters along the way; as the leader left, I turned to my companions to express this feeling.

"Kind of odd nothing attacked us along the way."

"Kind of disappointing," Megumin stated. "Although, not surprising."

"Why?"

Aqua interjected. "Kazuma, the Devil King is dead, and Demon Army is no more; powerful monsters barely existed around Axel as is. You're more likely to find a golden-horned rabbit than come across dangerous creatures."

"Still doesn't explain why weren't attacked by anything."

"Our levels, Kazuma," Megumin stated. "Aside from you, me, Aqua, and Darkness are around level 50; lower-level monsters won't approach us."

I sighed at the slight against me. "You say that, but I seem to recall some Giant Frogs doing exactly that."

"You could blame Aqua for that."

Aqua shot a look of astonishment at Megumin.

True, had Aqua not reduced her divine aura we'd likely be attacked regardless of our levels.

Megumin smirked. "That being said, once we head towards Elroad it should be quite a different story."

I looked at her perplexedly. "Why's that?"

Darkness answered. "We're in the capital now; while I've heard strong monsters are still quite uncommon around here, they should still be far more prevalent than they are around Axel."

"Not to mention their overall levels are higher as well," Megumin added.

This was common knowledge—and something I knew but had forgotten.

"Alright," I said, "let's see if we can find a place to stay at and get some food."

"Oh, I'm surprised you're not saying, 'let's stay over at the palace'," Aqua mocked.

"Indeed," Darkness agreed. "I'm actually surprised."

"Oi, if you guys keep saying stuff like that, I'm gonna get mad; it's not like I have nothing but Iris on my mind whenever I come to the capital."

They all looked at each other, their faces expressing extreme doubt.

My brow twitched. "Oi, the only reason I suggest seeing Iris-chan when I'm here is because when else am I supposed to see her?!"

"Probably every so often," Megumin said offhandedly, "you know, like a normal person."

I narrowed my eyes on her. She looked away with a slight pout.

"Whatever, we're not staying at the palace so it's fine; let's stay somewhere—"

"How about Darkness' estate?" Megumin suggested.

"Huh, oh yeah," I said, turning to Darkness. "How about it?"

"Huh—oh, well, I don't have any issue with it; although, I don't know if it's any better furnished since the last time me and you visited, Megumin."

"Maybe we should do something about that?" Megumin remarked. "It'd be nice to have a reliable place to stay at whenever we visit."

"I agree," I said to everyone's astonishment.

"You agree?" Megumin said in bewilderment.

"Umu."

"Are you ok, Kazuma?" Aqua said as she worriedly checked me.

Once again, I was growing agitated. "Oi, that's enough; can you guys stop thinking like my only purpose of coming here is to see Iris-chan!"

And once again, they all exchanged looks. Aqua spoke. "I mean you say that, but isn't it really the only reason?"

"Tch, this bitch."

Embarrassingly, I had no retort to her assumption; visiting Iris was indeed the largest reason for me ever coming to the capital.

Soon enough, we arrived at Darkness' capital home. On the outside, it looked much like any other mansion. In fact, it was fairly similar to her own family's manor back in Axel (which was to be expected); inside, however, was a different story.

"Geez, Darkness," I said as we walked in, "what's up with this place; looks like you just bought it from foreclosure."

Darkness knit her brow. "I keep telling you it's barely furnished; fact of the matter is my family hardly ever needs to use this estate."

Aqua looked around inquisitively. "I think with a bit of cleaning this place could be just as cozy as the mansion back in Axel."

"I didn't have any issues sleeping when me and Darkness came last," Megumin commented.

"You have pretty low standards," I remarked.

"Of course she does; she chose you, after all," Aqua said teasingly.

Megumin seemed satisfied with Aqua's retort so she didn't say anything more.

"Listen, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this needs to be palace levels of comfort, just surprised to see a noble's home look like this," I clarified.

Darkness sighed. "I feel like I keep saying that my family isn't extremely wealthy, at least by noble standards."

"Don't worry, Darkness," Megumin interjected, "we'll clean up this place and furnish it nicely."

"Well, I guess I'll leave that stuff to you guys," I said as I walked over to the couch by the hearth; one of the few pieces of furniture in the entire place.

"Leave that to us?" Megumin queried. " And what exactly are you gonna be doing?"

"Relaxing," I replied, laying down on the couch as I did.

"You could come with us, you know?"

"Look, that trip had me feeling more tense then not; it was a mistake to take the carriage."

"Huh, I didn't find it unpleasant at all," Darkness said.

"Yeah," Aqua agreed.

"Of course you guys didn't feel tense; listen, I sat through that entire trip feeling like something was gonna go wrong and that I was gonna end having to clean up whatever mess you guys were inevitably gonna stir up."

"You make it sound like we're the ones to blame whenever something goes wrong?!" Aqua yelled.

The irony made me laugh. "Alright, you girls go have your fun and let me get some rest; just don't go spending too much."

Part of me felt it was highly irresponsible of me to let them go and shop unsupervised, but I was currently too tired to care; should they cause me some financial burden, I'll simply push the debts onto…then it hit me…the only one who would cause the least amount of worry in this situation was the only one not part of my household; the other two however…

I got up to go after them, but they were already gone. I silently cursed myself as I sat back down on the couch.

"Eris, if you're listening, please make sure your idiot senpai and kohai don't end up spending everything we have."

"Grrr, that Kazuma, I can't believe he's looking down on us after all we've done for him," Aqua said in exasperation. "I'll make sure to buy some expensive drinks with his money."

I sighed. "Aqua, you know doing something like that is just gonna get him on your case later on."

"Quiet, Megumin, Kazuma won't notice as long as we run a large enough tab."

"I, I don't think that's gonna work, Aqua," Darkness remarked.

"It's never had in the past," I added.

"Would you two stop worrying; besides, it's Kazuma's fault for not coming."

"Hey," Darkness said, "while I appreciate what you guys are doing, let's try to keep the expenses low."

"What for?" Aqua said. "If Kazuma's paying for all of it we don't have to worry; we're filthy rich."

"Aqua," I interjected, "you do know that money is essentially all of ours, right? If Kazuma goes broke that means we will too."

Aqua appeared genuinely surprised at the revelation.

"Although," I continued, "that does mean Kazuma will probably become more productive."

"Umu," Darkness said, agreeing with my assumption. "It'll mean we'll have to take some high-level bounties too." She was growing increasingly flushed as her mind began to wander off on presumably some difficult-to-kill monster.

"Alright, alright, you two, I get it. It-It wasn't like I was gonna spend a ridiculous amount of money anyways; I need to leave Kazuma something for my birthday, after all."

"Wait, birthday?" Darkness queried. "Aqua, aren't you a goddess; why would you have a birthday?"

I stared at Aqua; I was curious to know this too.

She smiled proudly. "Everyone knows you receive the greatest amounts of gifts and blessings on your birthday. The day just happens to be the same as the day of the Axis Order's inauguration."

"Ah, so you consider the day of the Axis Cult's creation as your own birthday; make sense."

Suddenly, as we were walking, a familiar person bumped into Aqua.

"Ah—who, oh, it's you," Aqua said in a mildly derisive tone.

"Chris," Darkness said, "what are you doing here?"

"Ah"—she scratched her scar—"I was just around; you know keeping my ear to the ground. You guys here by yourselves; where's Kazuma?"

"Oh, he's at the family manor."

"He's lazing about, as usual," I added.

Chris smiled. "So, what are you guys doing back in the capital; here on an important errand?"

"Nothing of the sort," I answered. "Just a pitstop before we continue on a quest."

"Oh, a quest?"

"Well, yeah, but right now we're looking to furnish Darkness' mansion."

"Ah, hmm, I don't know how much help I'd be in choosing things, but do you mind if I came along?"

"Not at all."

Afterwards, we found ourselves dipping in and out of various stores, some not even pertaining to furniture; eventually however, we ended buying everything we needed…and a little extra.

Chris looked over a small booklet she kept. "Geez," she said somewhat worriedly, "just a little over 100 million in expenses; I'd imagine Kazuma-kun isn't gonna be very happy about this."

Aqua threw an arm around Chris' shoulder and pulled her close. "Say, Chris, why don't we all go for drinks now; you know, to celebrate fixing up Darkness' place."

Chris gave a nervous laugh. "No, no, there's no way I—"

Aqua pulled her closer. "Don't be such an Eris Cultist; learn to live a little. I know that Goddess Eris is pretty stuck up and rigid when it comes to rules, but I assure you, she won't mind if you're hanging out with her senior." Aqua narrowed her eyes.

Chris, who was looking somewhat torn at what was being said to her, looked down despondently.

"Aqua," Darkness interjected, "maybe you shouldn't pick on Chris so much, she's—"

"Oh really?" She replied, rocking Chris as if they were best buds. "I hear that the Goddess Eris is a bit of a free spirit; that she likes to wander away from her job from time to time. Would you happen to know anything about that?" She stared at Chris with a devious smirk.

"Of-Of course not—"

"Really? You know it's not good to lie to a goddess, right? Then again…you don't seem to be particularly alarmed at the fact that I'm a goddess."

Chris smiled nervously.

"She could just be playing along with your delusions of being a goddess since you're in the Axis Cult," I commented.

"Megumin!" Aqua yelled, her tone a mix of surprise and anger. "You of all people know I'm an actual goddess!"

I looked away.

"Gah!" She looked at Darkness; who did the same in a somewhat timid manner. "I am a goddess!"

Chris took the moment to pull away from the exasperated Aqua. "I'd love to stay and join you guys on that offer, but I-I just remembered I had an a-appointment. See ya!" As she ran off, she waved back at us. "See ya, Darkness! See ya, Megumin-chan!"

"How could you two embarrass me like that?!" Aqua said with a pout. She knit her brow, and then quickly smiled. "This calls for some drinks."

-Sometime later…

"Aqua, while I don't mind having a few drinks, we could've just gone to the guild hall," Darkness pointed out.

"I don't mind the guild hall either," she replied, taking a swig from the cup of hard liquor she ordered. "But sometimes you have to change up the scenery…not to mention," she said with a smug grin, "this place is said to have some of the best drinks in the capital."

"I think you should have a fair assessment of how true that rumor might be," I remarked, noting all the empty cups of various drinks she's downed.

"Megumin," Darkness said, "I'm surprised at how little you've drank; you usually end up a mess when you do."

"Fufufu, Darkness, I see you have a rather inaccurate impression of me; I'm quite capable of—"

"Your wine, miss," a waiter said, placing a large goblet in front of me.

When they walked away, Darkness stared at me blankly.

I coughed. "I-I was saying, I'm quite capable of…self…restraint…"

Darkness sighed. "This is why me and Kazuma didn't want you drinking at such a young age."

I swung my arm dismissively. "Stop treating me like I'm some little kid, Darkness; I'll have you know, I'm probably more of an adult than you! Size isn't everything, you know."

Darkness shirked back. Her face was growing red; probably from a mixture of different emotions. She knit her brow. "Oh, so you're an adult now, are you? Fine then, Megumin; let's put that to the test."

I was slightly surprised; Darkness wasn't the type of person to ever challenge me. "F-Fine, what do you have in mind?"

"A drinking contest of course; you seem to think you're more of adult than I am, then let's drink to it."

Knowledge and experience would say this was a doomed challenge; I would fail. Darkness was not only taller and older than me, but she had far more mass than I did; especially on her chest. These reserves of fat would prove to be beneficial in staving off inebriation; it was one of the reasons, I got drunk far faster than anyone else I knew. Nevertheless, I couldn't—I wouldn't back down from a challenge.

"You're on, Darkness; what's the wager?"

"Hold on," Aqua interrupted. "You need someone to preside over this duel; I'll be the judge."

We both nodded in agreement, then Darkness spoke. "I wager that the loser of this duel never drinks unless authorized by the winner."

"Tch—fine, I accept. What are we drinking?"

"I'll choose," Aqua said with a smile. "Let's start this off with something light—"

"Negative," I interjected, "the strongest drinks!" I demanded, slamming an open palm on the table; I winced from the pain I caused myself.

"Ohhh, Megumin's pretty serious about this," Aqua said.

Darkness was taken aback by my brazenness. "F-Fine, but I think this is a little bit reckless of you, Megumin."

"You scared you'll lose, Darkness?" I mocked.

"L-Lose?! You have to be joking; Megumin, it's pretty much a foregone conclusion that I'll win this handedly."

"We'll see about that."

-Ten mugs of hard liquor later…

"Megumin…you should stop now," Darkness said; her face was flush and her eyelids slightly drooped.

I had my head on the table and was barely able to lift myself from it. I held a half-finished mug of liquor in my hand. "Non…non…shence," I slurred. "I'm"—I pressed my lips to the container and threw my head back, gulping whatever liquid made it into my mouth; as it happens, most of it didn't, landing either on my chest or my lap. I slammed the mug down on the table—"gewd."

Aqua, who was drinking all this time, leaned on her arm; she appeared to be quite drunk herself. "M-Megumin, I don't, I don't think…I can count that one."

"Ish fine, I'll"—I wretched at the familiar feeling of near-toxic sottishness—"I'll hab uh 'nother."

As I reached for another mug, I kept missing the handle several times. In a drunken rage, I grabbed the container itself and placed my face on it; I took a deep breath—nearly throwing up in the process—and gulped down the entirety of the contents within. At this point, I was breathing heavily and could feel the cold sweat built up on my body begin to make me cold.

"M-Megumin," Darkness said; her voice was full of concern, "let's…let's just stop, ok?"

I said nothing, my glazed eyes staring lazily at her.

"Eleven cups for Megumin," Aqua announced. "Your turn, Darkness."

As Darkness was about to take another drink, she put it down and looked to Aqua. "Aqua, why aren't you stopping this; look at Megumin, she's falling apart. What am I supposed to say to Kazuma if he finds out I allowed this?"

"Why are you so worried?" Aqua replied. "If you're lucky, Kazuma will probably hit you."

Darkness sat silently; she appeared to be in deep thought with a smile slowly building up. She shook her head furiously. "No! Aqua, we, we can't allow this; we're supposed to be the ones Megumin looks up to; her role models."

Aqua seemed to come to her senses. "You're right!" she said, sitting up. "How could I allow this to happen?" Aqua knit her brow in frustration. "I should've ordered more variety for you two; now this is all she'll know about alcohol—"

"Aqua!"

"What?!"

"The drinking's the problem not the type of drinks!"

"Oh—right, right. Megumin," she said, looking at me, "that's it; contest is done."

As she said this, I felt my consciousness slip away from me and my eyes roll back.

"You guys…are—arrggh!" I was hearing Kazuma; I could tell by the way he sounded, he was furious. "Every…goddamn—"

"It-It was Darkness' fault!" I heard Aqua retort.

"Ah—Aqua!" The astonishment in that response told me it could only be Darkness.

"What, it's true though; you were the one who challenged Megumin."

"I-I didn't think she would take it so far—"

Kazuma burst out laughing; however, it was anything but gleeful in manner. "Are you an idiot, Darkness-no, you must be an idiot! You thought this chunnibrat wouldn't take it so far; it almost astounds me how stupid a thought that is. Seriously, makes me think you haven't spent the last two years around her!"

The way he was chewing out the other two…I didn't dare open my eyes; not that I could've, my mind was still spinning.

"I-I tried to stop her, but she—"

"Ugh, whatever! I'm more concerned with the fact that you guys went out to drink—did you even buy the furniture?!"

"Of-Of course we did!" Aqua retorted.

"Oh, you did, and how much did it come out to?"

Suddenly the other two went quiet. If I could see what was happening, I'd imagine Kazuma was looking at them rather suspiciously.

"What. Did. It. Come. Out. To?" He said once again.

I could hear someone trying to whistle away; Aqua.

"Oi, did you guys hear what the hell I just—"

"100 million…eris…" Darkness answered loudly, her voice trailing off.

"…a hundred…million…WHAT THE HELL DID YOU GUYS BUY, A DAMN HOUSE?!" Suddenly, I heard Kazuma stomping my way; he yanked me by my robes and pulled me up. "Oi, you, wake the hell up," he said gruffly, "I KNOW YOU'RE AWAKE!"

I clenched my eyes closed; although, in hindsight, it probably gave me away.

"Wake up!" He yelled, shaking me.

"Ahhh, Kazuma, please, don't shake me," I said sickly; the feeling of dizziness was reaching vomit-inducing levels.

He let go of me, almost as if he knew. "How the hell could you be so reckless—all of you?!"

"This," Aqua said, mustering courage, "this isn't only our fault, you know; you're the one to blame too!"

"You selfish bitch! You go out, spend my money, and get drunk off your ass and then you have the nerve to tell me you're not to blame for our troubles?! I'll make sure I remember that when I don't give you any allowance!"

"Ah—wait, Kazuma, I-I was just joking; maybe the others are to blame just a bit more than you; don't take away my allowance."

"Shameless…she didn't even have the integrity to say she was at fault…then again, this is Aqua we're talking about."

"Where's all the furniture anyways; did they say when they'd make the delivery?"

"Umm," Darkness began, "we told them to deliver it here as soon as possible."

"So, when's that, today?"

"Maybe?"

"Maybe; can't you guys even—" Kazuma took a deep breath and then sighed. "We're supposed to leave tomorrow morning; we can't just sit around waiting for the furniture to get here."

"Why not?" Aqua queried.

"Cause we'll miss our ride out."

"No," I said, finally opening my eyes. "we're not leaving tomorrow."

"Why?" Kazuma said; he stared angrily at me. "Because you're too hungover to?" He grabbed me by my choker and pulled me closely. "Whose fault is that?"

"Kazuma," I said, my tone indifferent, "if you don't let go of me, I'm gonna throw up all over you."

"Careful, Megumin," Aqua said, "you might be threatening him with a good time."

I couldn't help but smirk at the slight.

"Oh, you think that's funny?" Kazuma got behind me and shook my head furiously.

"No, no, no—blech!" I threw up all over the floor.

"There," he said, crossing his arms, "that takes care of you needing to throw up. You guys better be ready to leave tomorrow morning."

Part 4

-Next morning

I awoke by a pile of my own throw up and instantly retched at the smell. As I shot away from the mess, my head felt like it was spinning unceasingly; within in seconds, I was covered in a cold sweat as I fought back the feeling to throw up once more. "Why?" I said weakly, cursing myself for my irresponsible actions. As I looked around, I noticed Kazuma and Aqua were sleeping on the couch while Darkness fell asleep on a dining chair. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

I stared at the door and then looked back at the others; they didn't even stir from their slumber. "Ugh." I felt terrible. They knocked once more; I looked back at the others again, hoping the proceeding knocks woke someone. "Coming," I said lowly. I stumbled to my feet and then quickly crouched down; the spinning was overwhelming, and I began to tear up at the feeling.

The person at the door knocked again, this time, more forcefully. I couldn't get up; I would throw up if I did. I slowly crawled over to the door and then pulled myself up using the door handle. I drew open the door and quickly laid myself against its frame.

"Delivery for"—the man looked down at a sheet of paper—"Dustiness Ford Lalatina."

"Sure," I replied, pulling my hat low over my head; all my senses were being overwhelmed by the ambient stimuli of the outside world. "You can put it…wherever."

The delivery men came in with a bunch of boxes and covered furniture; in all the commotion, the others finally woke up.

"Ah, the furniture arrived," Darkness said with a smile.

"Good timing," Kazuma commented.

Aqua rubbed her eyes wearily. "Why is everyone making so much noise?"

"It's gonna be a while," I said as swayed over to the couch and fell upon it.

Kazuma stared at me. "What do you mean?"

I pointed out the door. He walked over and looked outside.

"W-What the hell—why are there so many—is this all of ours?!" He yelled.

The line of wagons carrying boxes and furniture was essentially a small convoy; it stretched down the end of the manor's walkway, out into the main street, and disappeared around the corner.

"What the hell; why are there so many things?!" Kazuma yelled, looking back at us.

Aqua got up and quickly opened one of the boxes; it was full of liquor. "It came!" She said with a smile.

"Huh?" Kazuma said, looking into the box. "Alcohol?!"

Aqua smiled proudly. "It's almost winter, Kazuma, and everyone knows that alcohol warms you up; I took it upon myself to order a bit so we can get through the cold."

"Oi, are you stupid or something; winter is months away—and alcohol does the opposite."

"Huh, what are you—"

"Alcohol makes you colder," he explained. "It draws blood to your skin and away from your core—how the hell don't you know this?!"

"Wait," Darkness said, "is this true?"

"Huh, you—really?!"

"Kazuma, that doesn't matter," Aqua interrupted. "It's still gives you a good feeling when you drink it in cold temperatures."

"Are all these boxes full of liquor?!" he exclaimed, opening another; it was indeed, full of liquor. "How much did you spend on all of this—is this why the bill was so high?!"

Aqua looked away and began twiddling her fingers.

"You damn spendthrift; I'm returning all of this!"

Aqua grabbed Kazuma. "Kazuma, wait!" She sobbed.

"Argh, get off me!" He said, trying to break free from her.

"You owe me this!"

"Owe you—did the alcohol rob whatever little bit of intelligence you have?!"

"Didn't you forget my bottle of Holy Reverie you smashed?!"

Kazuma went quiet and then looked away.

"You do remember; I hope you also remember how expensive it was!"

"So you bought 100 million eris worth of alcohol?!"

Aqua got up and brushed herself off. "Of course not…there's only 26 million eris worth."

Kazuma grabbed her by the collar and shook her. "You go out there and tell those guys to return this stuff!"

"Ahhhh, Kazuma, you're being unreasonable!"

"Tch." He let her go.

Aqua fell to her knees and began sobbing. "I was even being considerate; spending far less than you owe."

"Oi, if you don't stop saying such stupid things, I'M GONNA SERIOUSLY GET PISSED OFF!"

"Kazuma," I said weakly, "please, stop being loud." I covered my ears as I tried to drift to sleep.

"Oi," he said, walking over to me, "don't even try and fall asleep; you know we have to go do this quest."

"I do," I whined, "but does it have to be now—I know I shouldn't have drunk so much, but I feel really sick, Kazuma."

He sighed deeply and crossed his arms. With a frown, he replied, "Next time I won't be so lenient, understand?"

I nodded silently, and then curled up tightly; I closed my eyes and allowed exhaustion to overtake me in my weakened state.

Letting Megumin sleep, I turned towards Aqua and Darkness. "Alright, you two, since you're responsible for this mess you're gonna help me carry in all this stuff."

"What?!" Aqua shouted in disbelief. "But that's why we have delivery—"

"Did you see the number of things out there?! If we let them handle all of it, we'll be here till midnight; I don't wanna hear any protests—you're helping!"

Sure enough, by the time we were done hauling in most of the cargo, it was already the early afternoon. Me and Aqua collapsed against the various boxes stacked around the house while Darkness stood proudly looking around; although she worked up a sweat, she didn't even seem the least bit bothered by the amount of work we did.

"I could go for a cold bath right about now," I said, still breathing quite deeply.

"I wanna go first," Aqua remarked.

"Oi, why do you get to go first; we had to do all this because of you. And anyways, can't you just go out back and douse yourself with a water spell or something?"

"Ah—what do you take me as, a plebian?! I'm a bonafide goddess, Kazuma; I'm not about to dump some water on myself out in the open when there's a perfectly good bath where I can do so!"

"Ugh, fine; you and Darkness can use the bath."

Aqua raised a brow, and the smiled. "Hmm, you're being awfully compliant; I wonder what's happened to you."

I frowned. "I don't know, maybe exhaustion? I'm too tired to argue with you, so just hurry up and go take a bath."

Aqua looked unconvinced, but she got up. "Ok, Darkness, come on." And off the two went to bathe.

I closed my eyes in an attempt to rest; however, I was interrupted.

"Kazuma." I looked over; it was Megumin, she was rubbing her eyes.

"What?" I said, still resting against the crate.

"Where's Aqua and Darkness?"

"Uh, they just headed to the bath; you should go take one now if you plan on doing so."

"Aren't you gonna bathe?"

"Umu, after they finish. Why," I said, opening one eye and looking at her, "you wanna take one together again?" I grinned.

"You know I wouldn't mind," Megumin replied casually; she sat down beside me.

Her succinct reply caused me some discouragement. "Hmm, remarks like that don't even faze her…not that they ever did, really." I sighed. "I'm a bit tired," I said. "I think I underestimated just how much stuff there was."

"Ah, right—well, for the record, I did try to stop Aqua from spending so much; hmm, even Chris did."

"Chris? So maybe she heard my prayers, after all."

"Umu; she showed up when we were headed to the stores."

I shook my head in disbelief. "How do three people fail at restraining one person's terrible habits?"

Megumin smiled with a mixture of nervousness and regret. "Aqua tends to be pretty difficult to talk down."

"I think you all are too easy on her."

"Maybe you're just too hard on her."

I chuckled wryly. "No, not enough. If she ended up spending this much, I'd hate to see what she would've spent had you guys let her."

"Ah, well, I think before Chris sort of helped, it was somewhere around 190 million eris."

My brow twitched; if I continued to let this troublesome goddess have her way, her spending habits will put us right back to when we started all of this.

I sighed. "I need a drink." I opened up the nearest crate and pulled out a bottle.

"Ughhhh." Megumin looked away sickly. "Please, no." She said, waving it off.

"It's not like I was gonna give you any—definitely not after what you just pulled." I bit down on the cork and tried prying it off; after more effort than I felt comfortable with, it popped off. "Damn thing is tougher than it looks," I thought, lightly biting down on my teeth.

Both of us sat quietly while I took a couple gulps from the bottle. After a while, I spoke. "Say, Megumin."

"Hm?"

"I'm surprised you haven't used your Explosion; it's been a week and a half since we've come here, and you didn't even get to use it on the trip."

"Umu." She nodded in agreement.

I looked at her with a bit of concern. "Something wrong?"

She shook her head.

"So, what's up with the uncharacteristic restraint?"

She smiled. "Restraint," she repeated, almost fondly. She looked at me. "You're trying your best too, right?"

"I see…Ah, yeah, guess I am; doesn't mean you have to though."

"I know, but neither do you and yet…" Silence permeated the air for a minute. "We can't always be slaves to our desires…"

I closed my eyes and looked away with a faint smile. This girl was learning, she was changing.

"That being said, Kazuma"—I glanced over; Megumin was trembling—"it's getting really difficult to do so."

But at the end of the day, she was still Megumin; the explosion-crazy archmage with a few loose screws.

"Ah, well, could you hold it a bit longer; we'll head out tomorrow morning for the quest."

"B-But what if there isn't anything for me to blow up?"

"Then I guess we'll just blow something up on the way back—why put up a tough front when you're coming apart at the seams?"

Megumin threw up a chunniish pose. "Fufufu, appearances are everything when you're being assaulted by dark forces, Kazuma."

"Eh, perhaps I placed too much faith in this girl's progress." I shook my head and sighed.

"Hey."

I glanced over. "Yeah?"

"You still have the notebook, right? Can you teach me some more tonight?"

"We'll have to be up early in the morning, you sure wanna; we might end up sleeping late again."

She nodded.

"Learning new stuff can be kinda fun, huh?"

"Umu, I suppose so…say, Kazuma, do you like teaching?"

"Teaching…hmmm…" I didn't think too much of it; the closest thing I knew to teaching was when I had to train newbies about certain aspects in the games I played. Other than that, there were no other "skills" I had that could be offered as learning. "I don't really mind it; to be honest, I find it kinda difficult."

"Why's that?"

"Well, in order to teach something, you gotta be qualified, right; something of an authority."

"Kazuma," Megumin paused. "…Kazuma, you're surprisingly smart."

"Oi—"

"No, no, I mean it as a compliment; you can be pretty insightful. Honestly, it shocks me since your INT stat isn't really all that high."

If I was being honest with myself, I don't think I was very smart; I had the benefit of knowing a bit of stuff from Japan—and in effect—a more advanced civilization. It shouldn't really be a surprise that the others would be amazed by some of the stuff I was able to come up with because of this.

"It isn't because you come from another world," Megumin said, almost as if she read my mind; I looked down, our rings weren't touching. "I'm not talking about the inventions you make, Kazuma."

"Then what are you talking about?" I said, taking another swig of alcohol.

Megumin sighed. "Nevermind," She said, getting up.

I grabbed her hand and yanked her down. She fell into my lap; an astounded expression present.

"Oi, if you're gonna start saying something about me I'd appreciate if you told me."

Her eyes were wide with astonishment. She gulped and gave a nervous smirk. "Is-Is Kazuma drunk?"

"Drunk? I barely had half a bottle."

While this was true, I hadn't noticed that the bottle in question was of a fairly strong alcohol; its fruity taste masked this fact. As I looked at Megumin I was beginning to feel the effects of the drink; my head started to feel hot and hazy, I shook it lightly as my thoughts slowly started to wander.

"Hey, Megumin, I think you might be right," I said, cupping my hand over my eyes.

"Oh, look who's getting drunk when they told me not to just a while ago."

"I'm not drunk—and you did it intentionally."

"It was a challenge, and you know I can't back down from a challenge; my pride as a Crimson Demon is at stake."

"Yeah, yeah, anyways, you should probably go take a bath before the others get out; it's been a while so I'm pretty—"

"I wanna take one with you—"

"That's a bad idea," I replied quickly; even in a state of drunken haziness I knew it was.

"…"

"…don't make this more difficult than it already is."

"…umu," Megumin said dejectedly; she slowly got up and walked off.

I grit my teeth; my mind was racing with all the things I instinctively wanted to do to her—I couldn't, especially with the other two around. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "Ugh." I looked at the bottle in my hand and took one last gulp of its contents; Aqua could have the rest.

-Sometime later…

"Kazuma."

I opened my eyes in alarm. "Megumin? What—"

"You fell asleep."

"Ugh." I rubbed my face and yawned. "How long?"

"It's been about two hours or so."

"Where are the others?"

"Aqua's…drinking and Darkness is setting up some of the furniture. Our rooms are already furnished so no need to sleep out here on the floor; you can go to your room."

"Ah, thanks. After I take a bath, we should probably get something to eat; I would cook something, but I'm pretty sure there's nothing stocked here."

"Even if there was, with how seldom Darkness or any of her family visits, it'd probably have gone bad."

"Good point."

"Anyways, I'll go tell Aqua and Darkness."

"Umu."

I went to bathe without incident and in coming out was met with the others waiting on me.

"Done?" Aqua said.

"Yeah," I said, adjusting my cloak. "Listen, since you guys spent so much, we can't afford to go all crazy with what we get; I'm especially saying this to you, Aqua."

She frowned.

"Oi."

"I got it, I got it," She replied with a pout.

"Good. Also, easy on the drinks; I don't want you guys whining about being too hungover in the morning." I narrowed my eyes on Megumin.

She averted my gaze.

"And you, Darkness." She stiffened. "You just try not to embarrass us."

"Em-Embarrass you?! If anything, I should be the one saying that; how many times have I—"

"Yeah, yeah," I said, waving her off, "let's go."

I heard her pant somewhat forcefully. I shook my head.

Several minutes later we were seated in a rather modest restaurant; more aptly, this place could be called a hole-in-the-wall.

Aqua looked around disapprovingly as she rested on her hand. "I know you said we weren't spending much, Kazuma, but isn't this place really cheap-looking, even for you?"

"Oi, this place actually serves good food."

"Umu." Megumin nodded. "I've actually been here with Yunyun before."

I shifted my attention. "Really?"

"Umu, it was a while back when we went out with Iris. In any case"—she turned to Aqua—"the onion duck soup they serve is actually really good."

A waitress came over and introduced herself. "What can I get you all?" She asked.

"I'll have the onion duck soup," Aqua said happily, and a glass of—"

"Water," I answered.

Aqua frowned and pouted at me.

"I'll have the same," Megumin continued.

"Me too," I said.

Darkness, who was looking at the menu silently this entire time, lowered it. "I'll have a diced gore boar salad with light seasoning, water as well."

The waitress gave a short nod and walked off.

"So," I said, looking at Megumin, " what's this about coming here with Iris-chan?"

"Ah, well, you know…"

Darkness interjected. "Megumin, are you still doing that?"

"Well, lately, no; there hasn't really been much time to."

The waitress returned with our drinks, and then left once more.

As we sat waiting for our food, Aqua lazily played with her water, making it move in unnatural and awe-inspiring ways; if only this goddess would put her talents to use…

Suddenly, a tall and heavily robed figure bumped into Aqua as they passed by; her water spilled over, causing her to turn around in anger.

"Hey!" She yelled.

The robed figure turned and stared at her with fierce yellow eyes; his feral-looking face was one that signaled an impulsive and wild temperament.

"Huh?" He said, his voice deep and intimidating.

"You spilled my drink!" Aqua shouted angrily.

"Oi, Aqua!" I said, trying to calm her down. I turned to the man, and nervously spoke. "Eh, don't worry, just forget—"

"Coward!" Megumin yelled, standing up. "You call yourself a man?!"

"Oi, you stop—"

Darkness slammed her fist on the table. "What kind of man just casually bumps into a woman like that; if you're trying to be a villain you should've chosen me and fully committed to the act—"

"Oi, oi, guys—what the hell, would you—"

"Tch." The man turned and began to walk away.

"Hey!" Aqua exclaimed, trying to grab the man's robes; I held her back.

"Aqua, would you—hey, stop it, you idiot, I don't need any trouble here; especially not from a scary-looking person like that."

Unfortunately, I was only one person and I couldn't stop Megumin's brazen action.

"Apologize," She said, holding onto man's robes.

He stared at her, his eyes slowly narrowing. Megumin stared back unflinchingly.

"Megumin," I said, somewhat worriedly.

"Humph," the man grinned, a small fang bared from the corner of his mouth. He turned towards Aqua and said, "Sorry". He stared back at Megumin; she let go of his robes. Afterwards, he walked off once more.

I let out a deep sigh of relief and immediately grabbed Megumin. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

"To spill Aqua's drink and ruin her performance; I couldn't let someone carelessly walk off and not apologize after such an affront."

"Oi, what if that guy decided to fight us instead; do you know the trouble you'd bring me?"

Aqua interjected. "What trouble; we're nobles, if anything wouldn't that guy in end up in trouble!"

"Oi, that's exactly why, you idiot!"

Aqua gasped. "Why are you so concerned now, you never had any issues using authority to have your way!"

"It's different now that I'm the one held responsible!"

"Hey!" Darkness shouted.

We all sat back down and shortly after our waitress returned. "Here we are—oh, did one of you have an accident?"

"It's fine," Aqua said; she was still somewhat agitated. She used Create Water to fill her cup.

The waitress cleared her throat firmly and pointed to a sign: No Magic Allowed!

"Eh, sorry," Aqua said fretfully.

The waitress handed out our meals, quickly wiped down the spill, and walked off.

"Itadakimasu," Megumin said happily.

I smiled and did the same, Aqua did as well, followed by Darkness, who said it in a mildly confused tone.

As we ate, Darkness looked up at me. "What does it mean?" She asked.

"Hmm, what does, Itadakimasu?"

She nodded.

Aqua answered. "Japanese way of giving a sort of blessing; they usually say it before eating. Mmm, Megumin, you're right, this soup is good."

"Oh, so a grace?" Darkness said.

I replied. "Eh, well, yeah; it's sort of like saying 'thanks for the meal' or 'let's eat'. This shouldn't have been the first time you heard it though."

"Eh, no, it isn't. I mean, I heard you say it before, but I just never really asked."

Minutes later, we all sat in delight with full bellies.

"Haaaah, I never thought a soup could make me feel so full," Aqua said, rubbing her stomach.

"Umu, I told you this place was good," I remarked.

"What was up with that guy though?" Megumin queried.

"What do you mean? Stuff like that happens from time to time; what's so out of the ordinary?"

"Hmm, I don't know; kinda felt a little odd."

I raised my brow and then sighed. "Don't raise any flags, please. Let's just hurry back and get some rest; we already have enough stuff on our plate to worry about." I raised my hand to signal for the check.

As we walked back the manor, I stared at Aqua angrily. "This is coming out your allowance."

"H-How was I supposed to know about that stupid rule?!" She whined.

"It's a standard rule and pretty obvious if you thought about it…tch, to think the penalty for such a thing would be so high though…almost came out to the same as if we went to a fancy restaurant."

"I was half expecting you to fight it," Megumin stated.

"I was thinking about it, but this day has already been more eventful than I'd like."

"Really?" Darkness remarked. "It's pretty tame compared to most of the stuff we usually get into."

She wasn't wrong; however, I didn't want it to be anywhere near our version of "normal". "Listen, since our ride out is gonna be gone by tomorrow, that means we'll have to make the trip using another method of transportation."

"Well using a horse-drawn carriage will take us about a little over a week (ten days to be exact) to get to Elroad's capital; this isn't quite as far, but it'll also probably take around three to five days."

"No," I replied, "since this is more of an investigation, we should avoid using anything that'll draw too much attention; we should walk."

"Walk?!" Aqua shouted in disbelief. "Kazuma, are actually stupid, didn't you just hear Darkness say it'll take us—"

"I heard her—and while I'm not happy with the distance, we also don't know how far towards Elroad this quest actually is; could be closer—"

"Or farther!" Aqua retorted.

I sighed. "Alright, we'll figure out what we'll be using tomorrow; just make sure you guys are all ready to go."

We made it back to Darkness' family mansion and quickly headed to our respective rooms.

As I walked into my own, I looked around in surprise; it was larger and more finely decorated than my room back in Axel. The girls did a fine job putting everything together; the thematic color being the green I often wore and lined with a gilded trim. I quickly changed into my tracksuit and jumped into bed; it was firm but had just enough 'give' to it to feel comfortable. As I closed my eyes to drift to sleep, my door opened; Megumin stood in her pajamas. "Ah, that's right," I thought, "the lessons."

Part 5

I opened my eyes in shock.

"You're awake finally," Megumin said.

"Wha-What happened?"

"Huh, nothing, you fell asleep; it's morning already."

"Really?" I scratched my head. "I don't, I don't remember last night."

Megumin raised her brow, and then smiled. "Looks like you slept really well."

"Ugh, did I end up teaching you some more Japanese?"

"Mhm," She replied with a nod; she wore a childish smile.

I sat up with a perplexed expression. "Is that all that happened?"

"Huh—Of, of course; what are you suspecting?"

"Hey, don't feign innocence with me, you know what I'm talking about; if anything did happen then I at least wanna be able to remember."

"I'm-I'm telling you, nothing happened; you just taught me Japanese and then we fell asleep."

"Then how come I can't seem to remember anything past the time you walked into my room?"

"I, I don't know; that seems pretty odd."

I stared at Megumin; she stared back. "You promise nothing happened."

"I, I promise, Kazuma; I, I wouldn't do that to you."

I sighed. "What the heck…I can't remember last night—I can't even remember falling asleep…how'd you sleep?"

"Huh—oh, well, I fell asleep with you. When I woke up, you were still fast asleep; I didn't really wanna wake you, so I let you sleep a little longer. Kazuma, it's probably nothing; you've been pretty worked up as of late, maybe it just the stress getting to you?"

"Megumin, she broke free; she's going your way!" Aqua yelled.

"Wait, what, broke free; what the hell is—"

"S-Sorry, Kazuma," Megumin said, turning around and getting into a combat stance.

A female form quickly whipped around the corner and stood at the front of the room; twin daggers drawn. For a split second, our eyes met, the next, she lunged forward.

"Shit, Megumin, she's in the way!" I quickly threw my pillow and darted towards Megumin.

As I grabbed her and pushed her aside, the assailant slashed the pillow. "BIND!" I yelled, but even with at the point-blank distance she dodged deftly and swept me off my feet. She threw her arms back and brought the daggers down swiftly.

"Got you!" Darkness yelled, slamming herself into the assassin with such ferocity that the impact shattered the frame of my bed.

All of us were panting from the adrenaline coursing through us; the assassin, however, lay unmoving.

"What—does anyone wanna tell me what the hell just happened?!" I yelled.

"Sorry, Kazuma," Megumin said in a regretful tone.

Aqua came into the room. "You got her, good."

"What's going on?" I posed once more.

"We were targeted," Darkness said as she held on tightly to the attacker.

"Targeted—B-By who?"

"We don't know."

"That's what we've been trying to find out all night," Aqua said; she looked extremely angry.

"Why didn't you guys wake me?!" I said exasperatedly.

"We tried," Megumin replied quickly, "but you wouldn't wake up."

"What, how? I'm pretty sure—"

"She hit you with this," Aqua said, showing me a thin needle-like object.

"What the heck is that?"

"Some type of poison dart; if I didn't heal you quick enough, that sleep would've been another trip to the other side."

It was covered in a nerve toxin," Megumin clarified. "Seemed to cause short-term paralysis."

"What—who—why—"

"That's what we've been trying to find out," Darkness interrupted. "We've been interrogating her for the last couple of hours."

I looked at Megumin; I felt angry at her deceit. "Why the hell did you lie to me?!"

"I-I didn't," she quickly answered. "You, you asked me if something happened…between…us…"

I frowned; technically, she was right. "Why not tell me about this anyways?"

"I, I didn't want you to worry." Megumin looked incredibly remorseful. "I'm really sorry, Kazuma."

I sighed heavily, pressing my palm to my head. "…is she still alive?" I said, looking at Darkness.

Aqua answered. "She's alive; has a couple broken bones, but still alive. Hey, Darkness, maybe you should break her legs."

Such a suggestion coming from a goddess; it was things like this that really made me question the validity of Aqua's divinity.

"Oi, calm down, not yet." I got up and cast bind on the assassin; even if they were a powerful individual, breaking through mithril was not something that can be done without notice.

We dragged her out to the living room and placed her on a chair.

"Alright," I said, "wake her up, Aqua."

Aqua cast Quick Heal, and the assassin stirred; Darkness stood near her at ready.

"Kazuma, let me handle this," Megumin said with a stern look on her face; something told me not to.

"No, Megumin, you shouldn't be the one—"

"I'm the only one of us who would," She replied succinctly.

Her reply shocked me, even scared me. "No," I said with a tinge of nervousness; I cleared my throat. "We need her alive."

"We've tried the nice way, now—"

"Megumin," Darkness interrupted, "that isn't you and it's unnecessary—"

"Unnecessary?!" she yelled; her eyes flared up. "She tried to kill us!"

"So it's suddenly ok to kill her; wouldn't that make us the same?" Darkness countered.

The assassin chuckled. We all stared at her. "That little girl is the only one who's capable of it, I can tell; she has the eyes of a—"

Megumin walked up and slapped her with the top of her staff. "You don't know me, you bitch!" Megumin yelled, grabbing her by the collar. "Now start talking or I'll—"

I pulled her away. "Oi!" Megumin struggled to break free from me. "Oi, stop it! Megumin!" She continued to fight me. "Stop it, dammit!" I turned her around and stared at her. "Stop," I said softly. Megumin continued to stare at me for a few seconds, as she did, her eyes slowly dimmed and her angered breaths slowly normalized.

"Sorry," She replied almost breathlessly; Megumin swallowed deeply.

"Let me handle this, ok?" I said gently.

She nodded meekly.

I let go hesitantly; Megumin walked off to the other end of the room.

Turning my attention back to the stranger, I asked, "who sent you?"

She was massaging the inside of her cheek with her tongue and then spit out a glop of blood. "You're wasting your time; I'm not saying anything even if you plan to kill me; I was dead the moment I failed."

"Oi, we're not trying to kill you; we just want answers. If you tell us, we can ask for leniency on your behalf."

"Like I said, you're wasting your time; just hurry up and kill me—or you can all kill yourselves and save me the trouble."

"Stop being stubborn; your life should be more important than whatever contract you have—"

"Tch, typical; you're all just children in the end—innocent to the way things are really ran. If I leave here without the job complete, I'm done either way. If you understand this, then you know there's no compromise."

"This isn't going anywhere," Aqua stated. " She was just as stubborn when we tried to get her to talk."

"We can just turn her into the authorities," Darkness said.

"Yeah," I said, "but given our status, she'd be executed anyways."

"Perhaps, but I'm sure they'll try to look into this—"

"And probably will meet the same results," I finished.

"Or go free," Megumin said, from the far side of the room.

We looked back at her.

She continued. "We don't know how far this goes."

"She's right," Aqua agreed. "We don't know who's connected and who's not."

"And it doesn't seem like we'll get any answers from this one," Darkness added.

"Darkness, keep an eye on her," I said. I walked some distance away, and then signaled Aqua over.

"What?" She queried; her arms were folded in frustration.

I pulled her close and began whispering. "We're gonna do a little performance and I need you to play along, ok?"

"Huh…sure, I guess, but what do you have in mind?"

"Don't worry about it; just play along. Performances happen to be one of your only redeeming qualities, so I expect some good improv from you."

"One of my only—"

"Shhh. Alright, follow my lead."

Me and Aqua walked back.

"So," I said, "why were you hired to kill us?"

The assassin remained quiet.

"…who ordered you to do it?"

"…"

"Do you know the reason we're being targeted?"

"…"

"…ok, how much are they paying you?"

"…enough."

"How much is enough?"

"…"

Aqua understandably looked at me in confusion. "Kazuma—"

"Do you like the Axis Cult?"

Everyone raised a brow and stared at the assailant for a response.

"Pfft, a bunch of crazy fanatics; hell no."

"Really?" Aqua said; her brow was twitching.

I continued. "Did you hear—of course you must've heard; someone in your profession must have a pretty wide network of contacts, right? Did you hear about what happened to the Demon King's General, Seresdina; what they did to her?"

"What?" Aqua stared at me perplexedly. "What are you talking about—"

"Well, did you?" I asked the assassin once more; she was beginning to look somewhat uneasy.

"Wait, Kazuma," Aqua said with mild concern, "what happened?"

Ignoring Aqua, I continued to speak. "Once they knew she was a part of the Demon King's Army, they started suggesting some pretty absurd things—some pretty unreserved feelings were getting thrown out about what to do with her…"

"What's your point?" the assassin replied curtly.

"My point is, that was just the rabble; this girl here," I said, pointing to Aqua, "she's the High Priestess—"

"You mean Goddess," Aqua corrected somewhat angrily.

"See? She even calls herself their Goddess."

"I am their goddess—why do you guys keep denying this?!"

The assassin swallowed deeply.

"Death is too easy when it comes to these guys—you know this; if unspeakable acts were being suggested by her followers, what do you think the head of those fanatics would do?"

"You're bluffing!" she yelled nervously. "I was being questioned by her the entire—"

"night…and she hasn't slept a wink because of it. Sleep-deprived, frustrated, and crazy—"

"Crazy?!"

"—I wonder what she'll think of doing? Of course, I could rein in her questionable tendencies; after all, I am her party leader."

The attacker gulped loudly once again.

"You know what I'm saying is true; you have to be an amateur if you didn't do some background checks on your targets after all—and you don't seem to me like an amateur."

"…"

"All we need is a name…if you don't give us something"—I narrowed my eyes—"you'll definitely wish you were dead."

"I can endure torture—"

"Torture?!" I laughed. "I endured torture at the hands of the Demon King's daughter for a week straight—don't talk to me about torture! I'm telling you what they'll do to you is something even I couldn't withstand."

"…"

"I'm sure you've heard of an Axis Cult nun by the name of Cecily."

"…"

"She assaulted me and had me crying out for help—this one is even worse!" I shouted, pointing at Aqua once more.

"Kazuma, I'm starting to get angry!" Aqua yelled, pouting as she clenched her fist.

"…"

"Fine then," I said, "I guess I'll just leave you two alone; come on Darkness, Megumin, let's give these two—"

"Wulf," she finally said through grit teeth. "His name is Wulf."

"Jackpot. Guess the saying holds true, fake it till you make it. Wulf," I repeated. "Know how this 'Wulf' looks?"

"No."

Megumin interjected. "So you know his name but don't know how he looks; I find that hard to believe."

"Say what you want, girl; it'd be foolish to give away your complete identity in this world." The assassin shifted her attention to me. "I don't know anything else; now either kill me or let me go."

"Kill you or let you go?" I said. "No"—I shook my head—"I don't think so; you caused me and my friends a lot of grief. Maybe I'll turn you into the Axis Cult anyways."

The assailant thrashed about wildly, but the binds and Darkness made sure she posed no actual threat. "You, lying bastard, I'll kill you!"

"Liar? I never once said anything about letting you go. Darkness, got any place we can hold her?"

"There's the cellar," She replied.

"Good, and I think I know how we'll keep her nice and calm too," I said with a devious grin.

-Couple minutes later; down in the cellar…

"If you think you can hold me here forever, you—"

"You like to drink, Assassin-chan?"

"What are you—"

"Take a look around," I said, waving my arm out towards all the boxes of alcohol. "Nice, cool, damp cellar filled to the brim with high-grade alcohol; 26 million eris worth…give or take few."

The assassin was beginning to grasp her situation and began growing somewhat anxious.

"I'm gonna get you so pissed drunk that you won't even be able to sit straight. Aqua," I said, holding out my hand; Aqua handed me a funnel.

"I think this is a waste of all this good alcohol," She said in a slightly aggravated tone.

I ignored Aqua and uncapped one the bottles. "Let's start nice and strong, alright, Assassin-chan?" I nodded at Darkness who immediately held the assassin down firmly in place.

Megumin walked over, a stoic expression on her face and wrenched open her mouth. "Don't choke," She said maliciously.

I placed the funnel in her mouth. "Bottoms up."

-Sometime later…

"Can't believe it took two whole crates," I said in disbelief.

We were all sat in the living room somewhat exhausted by the turn of events.

"She is an assassin," Darkness remarked. "That's an advanced class; I'm pretty sure she has quite a few points in several resistances."

"True, but I'm more amazed she was able to fit so much of it in her stomach." I turned my attention to Aqua. "Oi, how long did you say she'd be out?"

"Huh?" Aqua look somewhat dejected; she was not happy about the application of said alcohol.

"How long will she be out?" I repeated.

"Oh, um…I think it was something like three or four hours."

"Something like? We kinda need exacts not estimates."

"It'll be long enough, ok?"

Megumin spoke. "I think we should've kept going till she exploded."

"Of course you do," I said with a sigh.

"What do you want to do with her, Kazuma?" Darkness queried.

"We can't really turn her into the authorities."

"Actually"—Darkness rubbed her chin—"I could probably turn her over to Claire."

"Umu, not a bad idea."

"I agree; Claire's definitely one of the only people we could trust wholeheartedly," Megumin commented.

"So, this 'Wulf' guy; have any of you ever heard of him during your time in the capital?"

They exchanged stares and then shook their heads.

"Seems this guy's an enigma then." I turned to look at the windows, there was light pouring through; it was already morning. "I say we go ahead and haul her over to Claire."

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Alright then. Darkness, you're handling her; whatever you do, don't let your guard down," I instructed.

"Don't worry, Kazuma; someone this dangerous has my undivided attention."

"Good to know," I said with a sigh; part relief, part disbelief.

Soon enough we were headed towards the palace; Megumin went ahead to notify Claire we were coming. Darkness, as promised, kept her attention and (most importantly) grip on the assassin which was slung over her shoulder while Aqua and I kept watch that she didn't wake early. Fortunately (or unfortunately), since we were staring at her like hawks, me and Aqua caught the signs of her stirring.

"Oi, Darkness"—she looked over her shoulder at me—"she's waking up."

Darkness dropped her on the ground, holding the assassin's bound arms tightly behind her back.

I knelt beside her and as she woke, my assailant fixed some drowsy eyes upon me; seconds later, they sharpened as a scowl replaced the groggy expression she just had.

"Oi, you awake, already?"

"Bastard!" She fought against Darkness' grip, but to little avail.

"I'm surprised." I glanced at Aqua. "Oi, Aqua, can you tell how drunk she is at the moment?"

"Huh, what do you—"

"Her blood-alcohol level."

"Oh, um, one sec." Aqua placed her palm over the assassin's head and closed her eyes; a moment later, she opened them. "She's still pretty drunk," Aqua replied as she looked at the assassin, and then me.

"What's that supposed to mean; like is she—"

"She shouldn't really be able to put up a fight…I think."

I frowned. "Oi, are you really that useless that you can't even tell—"

"Hey, I don't see you giving accurate measurements!"

"Oi, aren't you an Archpriest though, isn't this the type of stuff you're supposed to excel at?"

"Huh, what kind of stupid assumption is that?!"

"…tch."

To be honest, I was expecting Aqua to be able to tell at a glance; with how often she got drunk, I felt it wasn't unreasonable to assume she had such capabilities; of course, it seems like I was overestimating her abilities once more.

I got up. "Oi, Darkness, stand her up."

Darkness complied; the assassin, with Darkness' efforts, staggered to her feet.

After trudging through the increasingly crowded streets for some time, we made it to the palace steps where Claire, Megumin, and a detachment of imperial knights awaited.

"Kazuma-dono," Claire said as she walked up to us, "Megumin-dono has informed me of the circumstances."

"Good, this should be brief," I replied.

Claire looked at the assassin, and a second later her eyes widened in shock. "Is this…impossible."

"What?"

Claire tore back the cowl the assassin wore; she shook her head and gave a faint smirk. "Nora Black, 'The Widow Maker'."

"Hmm, with a name like that, she sounds like some hotshot assassin. Is she someone important?" I queried.

Claire smiled, placing a hand over her face. "Besides her original moniker, she's also known lovingly throughout the capital as 'Black Widow'; she's been responsible for a vast majority of assassinations throughout the kingdom." I stared worriedly at the drunken assassin. "Despite our best efforts, she's eluded capture…till now." Claire shook her head in disbelief. "To think that you'd be the one to catch her though; the Goddess Eris must really like you, Kazuma-dono."

"Um—just out of curiosity, how many assassinations has she—"

"From the ones we know, at least twenty-four."

"Twenty—how, how come she isn't more well—"

"She isn't publicly well known in order to keep the peace; if everyone knew an assassin of her caliber was prowling, do you know the panic that would cause? Besides, her method of assassination happens to be quite discreet; if you don't know what you're looking for, you wouldn't really think much of it."

I cleared my throat nervously. "I see…and what—"

"Paralysis; she injects her targets with a toxin that causes paralysis which eventually causes death from asphyxiation."

The girls stared at me with a rather trepidatious look.

"Uh…oh." My voice came out as a squeak.

"Anyhow," Claire continued, "thank you, Kazuma-dono; you've relieved us of a major threat. I'll handle things from here."

As Claire went to grab Nora, Nora threw up causing all of us to jump back in surprise; it was the fraction of a second she needed, quickly vaulting over Darkness and darting towards the crowded square below.

"Dammit—after her!" Claire yelled at the guards; as they sped off on her orders, she quickly ran forward to join them; however, I swiftly grabbed her arm. "Kazum—"

"You need to stay here," I said.

"What—why—"

"Who's watching Iris-chan if you're not?"

Claire immediately recomposed herself. "You're right; that was nearly a fatal mistake." I let go.

Megumin added. "Not to mention, are you absolutely sure of the guards present?"

Claire's eyes widened once more. She shook her head in embarrassment. "How foolish of me…I didn't even give it any thought." She sighed heavily. "This is major error on my part—dammit; I never expected her to vomit. Come to think of it"—she scrunched her nose—"why does it smell so strongly of alcohol?"

All of us looked away.

"Nevermind that," she said hurriedly, "I'll make up for this mistake and assemble a loyal task force of knights to go after the 'Widow Maker'."

"You could always just send us," Megumin remarked, posing proudly.

"This damn brat! No, she can't!" I retorted. "Remember, we still have the Royal Provision to do."

"Kazuma-dono is right. Worry not, I'll take care of this; it is my fault that she got away. Anyhow, I shouldn't keep you all; Megumin-dono told me due to the circumstances none of you really had a good night's rest."

As she said this, the reminder seemed to cause us to feel the fatigue of little sleep. Afterwards, Claire returned to the palace while we headed back to Darkness' place.

"Kazuma," Aqua started, "aren't you worried that assassin might come back?"

I shrugged. Part of me did feel nervous at the thought that someone so infamous was out to get me, however, the tiredness I was feeling prevailed over the anxiety. "She's pretty screwed," I replied. "Not only did she give up the name of her client, but I'm pretty sure she can't make any big moves since the capital will be on the lookout for her; if anything, she shouldn't attack anytime soon."

"Better question," Megumin interjected. "Are we actually heading out on this quest today?"

The thought seemed to make me even more tired. I pressed my palm to my head, slowly running it down my face in exhaustion. We've been here two days past due. "No," I said somewhat dejectedly; another day gone to waste.

Aqua let out a loud sigh of relief. "Good, now I can go take nice hot bath and drink some wine; I've been wanting some ever since last night."

I frowned at her. "Are you sure you're the Goddess of Water—no scratch that, are you even really a goddess; you seem more like a drunk to me."

Aqua gasped. "How dare you, you little ingrate! Maybe I'll make it so you can never have a drink in your life. Knowing you, Kazuma, you'll probably end up doing something disgusting like drinking your own urine."

"Oi."