.
It's Monday again!
But I have the day off, so this one is not so bad. ha ha.
.
.
Chapter 136
agnât'nâtha = daughter-in-law
agnât'adad = father-in-law
agnât'nadad = brother-in-law
~X~
Fili and Sier stood in the doorway to their sons' room, smiling at the sight before them. Even though their daughter had her own room, Flinn, Frerin, and little Freya, were all snuggled into the same bed, each one sound asleep with smiles on their faces.
"It still pains me deeply to think I could have returned home only to find that I had lost the two of you," Fili whispered to her, his tone deadly serious. "Promise me that you will never do anything like that ever again."
"Like what?" Sier asked, turning to look at him in shock. "Defend my loved ones? Protect this mountain? I can't guarantee you that, Fili, any more than you could make such a promise to me." She reached up and stroked his cheek. "All I can assure you is that I will never do such a thing again unless it is absolutely necessary. All right?"
"If that is the best you can give…I'll take it," he said with a heavy sigh. "But just in case…I plan on giving you a few more lessons in fighting. All right?"
"I would welcome them," she smiled. "But, I will have you know, I held my own pretty well. And that hidden knife in my boot thing, came in rather handy. Thanks for that little trick."
"Always have a blade hidden on your person at all times," he nodded, repeating the words he had ingrained into her some time ago. "At least one…but more would be better."
The two chuckled softly as they turned back to stare at their children.
"Freya really missed her brothers," Sier whispered. "I doubt they will be able to shake her for at least a week."
"Freya was not the only one who missed her loved ones," Fili assured his wife, leaning in to nuzzle her ear gently.
"I know the feeling," she replied, smiling at his playful antics. Turning, she brought her lips to his, while allowing her hands sneak beneath his tunic, exploring the peaks and valleys of his rock hard chest.
"Careful, wife," Fili said in a breathless moan, shutting his eyes as he fought to control himself. "You're playing with dragon fire."
"Oh?" she teased, not ceasing her ministrations for a single moment. "Well then, if this is to end in fire…then we shall both burn together."
Fili needed no further urging, and in one swift movement he scooped up his wife, drawing a small squeak of surprise from her as he headed directly towards their chambers. Kicking the door open he strode across the room and tossed her onto the soft mattress, hearing her gleeful laughter behind him as he returned to the door, bolting it securely. Turning slowly, he stared at her hungrily, his hands slowly divesting himself of each article of clothing as he made his way back to the bed. He loved how her eyes followed his every move, her lips turned up into a bright and eager smile.
"I've missed you, my one," he whispered, as he eased himself onto the bed, hovering over her as he supported himself on his knees and forearms.
"Prove it," she urged, her voice deep and husky.
And that was exactly what Fili did…until they both fell asleep in each others arms, completely exhausted, but with smiles on their faces.
.
.
Morning came, and with it the drawing of a whole new day. Yet for one dwarf in particular, it was as if it were the beginning of a whole new life. One of freedom and joy. Flinn had woke early, his body still used to the schedule set out by his former orc captors, yet he had not stirred one inch, allowing himself to slowly acclimate to his situation and surroundings. The first thing he noticed was that he was actually warm for once, not shivering on the cold stone in the vast cavern. He also had a soft feather mattress beneath him, one that cradled his weary bones quite deliciously. Yet what amazed him the most, was the silky smooth skin of his beloved wife, Dis, nestled against him, her head resting on his scarred chest and her ebony hair spread over him like a blanket. Oh, how he had missed this!
His eyes began to tear up as he thought of how much he had missed, how many years had passed since he had held her like this. Their lives together had just begun, the couple only having been married for less than a decade. Still, those few years had been more than enough to sustain him during his near century of imprisonment, dreams of her feeding the hope that had kept him alive. And now he was back…back home in her arms, where he belonged.
The previous night had been beyond words, the tender touches, the soft kisses, and the near euphoria of their union even now causing him to shudder with desire. They had spent the night relearning each other, their likes, their pleasures, as well as each curve and touch. When they had at last succumbed to exhaustion, it had been a deep and dreamless sleep, one of complete satisfaction and love.
Now Flinn feared moving, for fear of spoiling this perfect moment, even though his body was demanding he rise to tend to certain needs. Still, he felt could lie there forever, drinking in the scent of his wife and reveling in the warmth of her touch. This was why he had fought so long and so hard to stay alive. This was his reward.
Unable to resist any longer, he allowed his hand to drift up to her hair, loving the feel of how it slipped like silk through his fingers. Dis had always taken pride in her hair, and Flinn had been only too happy to spend hours brushing and braiding it for her after they were wed. It was a dwarf's delight, to care for their one's tresses, and he had never shirked his duty. Yet the soft movement caused Dis to stir, her arm across his chest tightening as she released a soft moan of pleasure.
"Good morning, my husband," she murmured in a sleepy tone. "And this time I know for a fact it was not all a dream."
"It still feels like one to me," Flinn admitted, turning slightly so that he could place a feather light kiss on her head. "I fear that I will soon awaken, just to find myself back in Gorbash's mines."
This caused Dis to raise her head, supporting herself on her forearm as she turned and looked down at him. Noticing the tears that had made their way down his cheek, she reached up to brush them away.
"No more sorrow, my love. No more fears or nightmares," she insisted, leaning in to kiss his lips. "You are home, and I will take care of you for the rest of our days."
"It is I who should take care of you, my one," Flinn insisted. "I have been derelict in my duty for far too long."
"You can't think that way," Dis chided him. "It wasn't like you chose to leave us. That you set off on some long journey with no plan on ever returning. You were a prisoner…a captive! I know you would have been here with us if you could. No one thinks any less of you, in fact, I am so proud of you for finding the strength to survive and make your way home. It's a gift I was not expecting, yet always wished for."
"It was all thanks to our sons," Flinn said with pride in his tone. "They have grown into fine dwarrow, Dis. You did an amazing job raising them."
"Thorin helped, though often I think he's the one who fueled their wild and reckless streak," she laughed, pleased to turn the conversation towards happier subjects. "Fili has always been more thoughtful and steady, but Kili…well, he certainly has Durin blood in him."
"He takes after you then, where Fili is more like me?" Flinn asked with a cheeky grin, one that did indeed resemble her older son.
"Oh, if I recall, you've had your share of reckless adventures as well," she laughed. "Do you remember the time you and Thorin got lost in the woods and ended up sleeping in that cave all night, only to find that a mother bear and her cubs were occupying the same shelter? I still can't believe you two got away unscathed…or that you didn't even know they were there!"
"Well, Thorin snored so loud, how was I to know we weren't alone?" he laughed in his defense. Yet at that moment something caught his eye, and sitting up he stared at the sword hanging on the wall over the desk. "Is…is that mine?"
Dis turned to see what he was referring to, giving a warm smile as she nodded her head.
"Yes, they brought it back from the battlefield," she told him. "It was bloody and damaged, but Thorin fixed it for me. I have kept it sharp and oiled, planning on giving it to Fili when he became king. But now…now it's yours once again."
"I…I don't know if I want it any longer," he said softly, looking away in regret. "It's been so very long since I felt anything like a soldier. And now that we are back home in Erebor, I was thinking I might go back to mining."
"Really?" Dis sounded surprised by this. "You would want to be a miner again?"
"Would you think less of me for wanting to?" he questioned. "Would it be an embarrassment to you if I were only a lowly miner, and not a soldier?"
"What? No, never!" she told him firmly. "I could never be embarrassed by you, my love. I was just shocked that you would even think of such a thing after spending the last twenty years being forced to do so by Gorbash. Your agnât'nadad is the king…and one day your son will take the crown after him. You need never return to the mines if you do not wish to."
"Dis…I thank you for your concern, really. But mining is in my blood," he explained. "When we were in exile, I took up soldiering, but only out of necessity, not because I wished it. But mining for my own pleasure…that was my first love." He gave her a sly grin. "You were my second though, and the one that will remain with me forever. There is no need for you to be jealous, but I would like to try my hand at it again, if that's all right with you."
"You can do anything you want, Flinn, son of Frár," Dis told him kissing him tenderly. "I will support you, no matter what."
Flinn smiled up at his beautiful wife, reaching out to touch her face. "I've missed this."
"Missed what?" she questioned, unsure as to what he meant.
"This…you and me," he explained. "Talking, laughing…touching. I've missed it all. And that is why I never want to be without it again."
"You never will," she promised, leaning down to capture his hungry lips, reveling in the love that passed between them. "You are home, my husband, and we will spend the rest of our days together…always."
"Yes…but right now, I fear I must leave you," he admitted with a guilty look. "I have a desperate need to seek out the privy, but I promise I will return to your side as quickly as I can."
"I will hold you to that, my love," Dis laughed, though inside she was reluctant to be parted from him even for a few moments. "You go take care of your morning routine, while I find us something to eat," she said, pulling back the covers and rising, before slipping on a dressing gown. She turned to see Flinn's heated gaze upon her, blushing slightly as she felt her body melt at the sight. "Flinn…didn't you say you needed to use the facilities?"
"Oh, right," he nodded, shaking his head to clear his mind. "But I expect to find you back in this bed when I return. So don't be too long."
"I won't," she giggled, feeling more like a newlywed than a dam of nearly two-hundred. Yet Flinn had always made her feel young and beautiful, and the way his eyes had followed her across the room left no doubt in her mind that he still desired her. And she planned to do everything in her power to let him know that he was still the same handsome dwarf she had married all those years ago. For to her…Flinn was perfect.
.
.
Kili had not slept well, his thought and worries about the following day, and his meeting with Thorin, having caused him to toss and turn all night. He was confused, for his uncle had not given any indication as to which way he would decide. Would he allow the two to wed…or would he forbid their union. And then there was the issue with his mother, for ever since she had fainted at the announcement of his love for Tauriel, Kili had been fretting about what she might say. He needed to talk to her…to explain things, and to get answers!
Thus it was, at the crack of dawn, Kili was at Bard's guest chambers, knocking quietly in hopes of gaining entrance without waking the whole family. Much to his relief, it was Tauriel who answered the door, looking alert and ready for the day. Slipping outside and shutting the door behind her, she quickly fell into his arms, happy to see him once again.
"I've missed you," Kili told her, speaking only the truth. "I was disappointed that I didn't even get to kiss you goodnight before Tilda spirited you away." He reached up and caressed the two beads dangling from her braid, loving the look of them there.
"That's the price you pay for meddling with a lady's love," Tauriel told him with a smile. "Tilda was not at all happy with either of you last night, and I had to hear about it."
"Really?" Kili sounded sincerely shamed by this news. "It was all Fili's idea!"
"One that you apparently went along with willingly," she reminded him, not allowing him to fully shift the blame onto his brother. "You will have to find a way to make it up to her. I doubt that her friendship is one you two would wish to lose."
"No, we go back a long way," he nodded. "We will make peace…I promise."
"Good. And as your reward, here is a good morning kiss just for you," she grinned, leaning down to place her lips lightly upon his. However, that was hardly enough for the hungry dwarf, and he soon deepened it to something more intense, leaving them both breathless when they parted. When she was at last able to speak again, Tauriel broached the subject of his presence there. "And what, besides the desire for a kiss, brings you to my door so early?"
"I wish to speak with my amad," he revealed. "And I want you to come with me."
"I do not think that is the wisest of ideas," she said hesitantly. "You saw how she reacted to the announcement of our engagement."
"But she doesn't know you!" Kili argued. "Once she does, I'm sure she will love you as much as I do."
"Or she might come after me with a blade for attempting to seduce her baby," Tauriel countered, folding her arms over her chest. "Perhaps it would be best if you spoke to her alone, and then I join you if it proves safe."
"But you will come with me?" he pleaded.
"Yes…but I will wait outside until you deem it safe to enter. I do not wish to upset your mother any more than I already have," Tauriel stated firmly.
"You know you have my adad's approval…as well as Fili, Sier, Dwalin, Bofur and Noir," he stated, ticking off the names on his fingers. "And most important…mine."
"And that's the one that truly matters," she grinned, loving how his eyes lit up whenever he looked at her. However, there were a few other things on her mind that she felt needed addressed, and now was as good a time as any. "Kili…if we do marry," she began.
"Not if…when," he insisted.
"Yes, when we marry," she said with a smile. "Where do you imagine us living?"
"Living? Why here, in Erebor, of course," he said matter of factly. But then he stopped and stared at her, his face turning a bit red. "Oh…that was rather selfish of me. I didn't mean to make such an important decision without consulting you, my love. Forgive me." He reached out and took her hands in his, kissing the back of both before looking up at her once more. "Tell me what you want. Where do you wish to call home?"
Tauriel smiled at him, loving how understanding he was being, that he was willing take her desires into consideration.
"My home is where you are," she assured him. "I do not care where we live, as long as I wake next to you each morning, and fall asleep in your arms each night."
"Oh, I like the sound of that," Kili grinned wickedly. "But would you be all right living here, in Erebor? Truly?"
"As long as King Thorin and your mother approve of us doing so," she nodded.
"They will," he stated, though even he could hear the doubt in his own voice. "Is there anything else that concerns you?"
"What am I to do as you wife?" Tauriel questioned. "I am trained as the captain of the guard, not as a princess. I do not wish to sit around in fancy dresses and become useless."
"You could never be useless!" Kili argued, sounding rather offended by the idea. "And you can do whatever you want, you will not be chained to my side, nor forbidden to pursue your own interests. And don't think for a moment that you being skilled in fighting and battle tactics will be overlooked or unappreciated. I can't say anything for sure, and it might take a while for everyone to become comfortable around you, but I will see that anything you wish to do is made available to you. I promise."
"That is all I could ever ask for," she told him, leaning in and kissing him sweetly.
"Well, now that we have that settled, how about we go get my mother's approval, and then we can tackle Thorin…together." He took hold of her hand and began to lead her through the halls once more, the she-elf helpless to do anything but follow her love.
.
.
So it was, as Dis was making her way back to the bedroom, a tray laden with delicious food and drink in her hands, she heard a knock at the door. Setting the tray down, she went to see who it was, not at all shocked when she saw her youngest son standing there, looking quite apprehensive.
"Amad?" he asked, doing his best to gauge her mood. "May…may I come in?"
"Of course, Kili!" she assured him, stepping aside as he shuffled in, his head still lowered slightly. "I have wanted to speak with you as well, but I've been a bit…well, busy."
"I know, and I'm sorry that I sprung this on you like that…but, after you saw Tauriel's braid, I was not about to deny it," he explained, at last bringing himself up in a proud manner. He might be willing to apologize for the circumstances, but he was not at all sorry about how he felt, or that he had every intention of marrying the one he loved. Yet, before he could say any more, a voice was heard from the bedroom…that of his father.
"Dis…love," he called. "You said you would only be a few moments. And now I'm definitely hungry for more than food." His last words were said as he opened the door and stood there, dressed only in his britches, his feet and chest bare and a rather lascivious smile on his face. A smile that quickly turned to shock as he saw his son standing there.
"Adad…what are you doing here," Kili asked, his innocent mind not quite catching up with what was going on. Yet when he looked at his mother, who was now blushing slightly, his eyes grew wide and he took a step back. "Oh…Amad! You and…oh, Mahal…no, no, no….don't even say it!" He stumbled backwards, covering his ears as his face grew beat red.
"Kili, your father and I are married," Dis laughed, amused by her son's reaction. "There is nothing improper about what goes on between us. It is how we made you, after all."
"NO! I don't want to know about anything that goes on, or has gone on, between you!" Kili gasped. "Not that I think it's wrong…but…but…your my mother! I can't even imagine you doing stuff like this!" He finally made his way over to the sofa and sat down, leaning forward with his head in his hands. "I think I'm going to be sick."
Dis gave her son a sympathetic shake of her head, before signaling Flinn to go get dressed before joining them in the sitting room. The older dwarf obeyed and quickly returned, fully dressed this time, in hopes of aiding in his son's recovery. Dis was sitting beside Kili, her arm around his shoulder as she spoke to him soothingly, an amused grin still on her face.
"I'm sure this must be difficult for you, Kili," Flinn said, taking a seat across from the two, not wishing to insinuate himself into their close family bond just yet. "I went away before you were really old enough to be aware of how things were between your mother and me. But I assure you, I loved her very much, and still do. I won't apologize for showing her how I feel either, but I am sorry you had to walk in on us like this."
"No…it's all right…really," Kili stated, taking a deep breath as he lifted his head. He still looked a little pale, but at least he was no longer green around the edges. "You're my parents, and you are married…it was just, well…a bit of a shock is all. I simply have to get used to the idea that you are not just my amad anymore…but a wife as well. Given time, I'll adjust…I'm sure of it."
"We thank you for your consideration and sacrifice," Dis teased, giving Flinn a little wink. "And I will try to do the same for you, Kili, when it comes time for me to hand you over to the lass you chose to share your life with."
"But that time is now, Amad," Kili was quick to remind her. "I have chosen…and it's Tauriel."
"I know," Dis nodded.
"And I won't change my mind either, no matter what you say," the younger dwarf continued, unwilling to let anyone talk him out of it. "I love her, and she loves me, and I will marry her no matter what you or Thorin say to the contrary. I'm a grown dwarrow , and I can make my own choices in life."
"I'm fully aware of that," his mother agreed calmly.
"I'm sorry if you disapprove, Amad, but I can't go against both my heart and Mahal's choice, for that's what she is…she is my one!" Kili finished firmly.
"And she appears to be a very lovely lass, at that," Dis assured him. "One I look forward to getting to know better."
This declaration seemed to stun Kili, and he suddenly realized that all this time, she had not been arguing with him…but instead agreeing.
"So…you're not upset with my choice?" he asked, looking confused.
"No, I am not upset," she told him, reaching up to cup his cheek. "Granted, the news came as a bit of a shock, and right on the heels of finding out that your father was still alive. That's the only explanation I can give for my rather unusual behavior at hearing it all…but I hope you did not think that meant I'm opposed to the lass. A bit surprised perhaps to learn that you chose an elf…but you have always been the type to push the boundaries in life. Thus I am willing to believe you when you say you are in love, and would like to learn more about this…Tauriel?" Dis sat back with her hands neatly folded in her lap and gave him a wide smile. "So…when do I get to officially meet my future agnât'nâtha?"
"She…she is right outside the door," Kili gaped, still stunned by his mother's sudden acceptance.
"Outside the door?" Dis gasped, springing to her feet. "You left her standing out in the hall all alone?" She hurried to the door and threw it open, spying the elf lass across the hall, leaning against the wall.
When Tauriel saw Dis, she straightened, worry springing to her eyes, and she found she had to work at not allowing her hands to drift towards her knives – her protective instincts kicking in at the sight of the fearsome dam. But this was Kili's mother, so no matter what, the elf knew she had to mind her manners, even if the dam might try and kill her.
"Tauriel…please, won't you join us?" the princess asked, her tone both soft and inviting, taking the lass off guard. "I would very much like it if you would."
Still a bit uneasy, Tauriel nodded and moved towards the door, slipping inside where she was greeted by the smiling faces of Kili and Flinn. She bowed respectfully to her future agnât'adad, before going to stand at her betrothed's side.
"Please, sit down," Dis encouraged, wanting everyone to be comfortable. "Would you care for some tea? Something to eat perhaps?" She gestured towards the tray on the small table before them.
Kili, never one to pass up free food, nodded and dug right in, causing Flinn to give a slight chuckle. Tauriel, unsure her stomach could handle any food at the moment, politely refused.
"So, Tauriel…if you will allow me to address you with such familiarity," Dis began. With a nod of agreement from the elf, she continued. "Those are some lovely beads you are wearing…you did a fine job crafting them, Kili." When her son only grunted his acknowledgement of the compliment, his mouth full of food, Dis pressed on. "I would very much like to hear how you and my son met…for something tells me that it was not solely on this journey that you two became acquainted."
"No…it was not," Tauriel admitted, giving Kili a questioning glance. Yet, since he was still eating, she told the story herself, relating to Dis how they had first met in Mirkwood over sixteen years ago. She left nothing out, from the attack by the spiders, to how she had thrown them all into the dungeons.
"It was there that we became friends," Kili at last chimed in, swallowing the final bite of his impromptu breakfast. "We talked a lot while I was imprisoned… and while I didn't realize it at the time, that's when I think I truly fell in love with her." He turned to give Tauriel an infectious smile.
"You fell in love in a prison cell…with the one assigned to guard you?" Dis shook her head in wonder. "Sounds like something only you would do, Kili."
"I too found myself strangely attracted to your son, Lady Dis," Tauriel admitted, completely understanding just how odd it all sounded. "And after he and his company escaped, I found I could not stop thinking about him."
"So, if you were both having feelings for each other…what took you so long to confess it?" Dis wanted to know.
"Well…a lot of things," Kili admitted rather sheepishly. "First of all, I'm a dwarf and she's an elf," he began, pointing out the most obvious obstacle. "Then there was the whole issue of not seeing each other for over a decade."
"Which was my fault," Tauriel stated, taking the blame on that. "I was afraid of my emotions, not fully understanding them for what they were, so I purposefully avoided Erebor in hopes that such thoughts would simply go away."
"But they never did…did they?" Dis asked, giving her a knowing smile, before letting her eyes come to rest on Flinn, the two of them sharing their one private moment.
"No…never," Tauriel said with a shake of her head.
"And I could not stop thinking of her," Kili confessed. "I kept comparing every dam I met to Tauriel…and they were all found lacking."
"Did your brother know?" the princess asked, already sure of the answer in her heart.
"Yes, but I made him promise not to say anything," Kili told her. "He guessed long before we went on the journey to the mine, and he said he would support my choice, no matter what."
"As will I," Flinn stated firmly, having already given the young couple his blessing.
"And I," Dis agreed, leaving both Kili and Tauriel stunned and silent. "I just want you to be happy, my son. I have waited a long time to see you in love, and I am not about to take that away from you simply because your ideal mate does not fit the norm. Do you think everyone was happy when I announced I was going to marry your father? I had lots of opposition, but as long as my family stood by me, and gave me their approval and support, I knew we could weather anything the world threw at us." She reached over and took Flinn's hand in hers, the love showing in her eyes truly a sight to see. "Even being parted for nearly a century. For in all that time, my love for him has not faded one bit."
"Nor mine for you, my precious diamond," he agreed, kissing the back of her hand as he too gazed at her with feeling.
"All right, I know I said I would get used to your lovey-dovey stuff eventually…but this is still too soon," Kili moaned, covering his eyes with his hands in a teasing manner. "How about you keep it to a minimum around me for a bit longer."
"Oh, Kili," Dis laughed, swatting at his leg and making everyone laugh, even Tauriel. "So, when is the wedding?" she asked, changing the subject to one less heated.
"Ummm, we don't know," Kili admitted, looking a bit downcast. "Uncle Thorin said we would talk about it this morning…but I don't know what he's going to say. Do you think he'll forbid it?"
"That rock-for-brains brother of mine better not!" Dis all but yelled, her expression turning to one of anger. "He might be your king, and helped raise you, but I'm your mother, and Flinn is your father! And if we give you our blessing, then he can't say one blessed thing to the contrary." The now furious dam stood up. "And I intended on telling him exactly that! Let me get dressed and we'll go speak to him together!" And off she stomped, slamming the bedroom door behind her.
"Remember what I said before, Kili?" Flinn asked, sitting back with a proud smile on his face. "Only the foolish attempt to deny your mother anything. And we can only hope that Thorin is not feeling particular foolish today."
So there you go. Dis is on board. Can they now iron things out with Thorin? I have high hopes.
Fili sure got lucky last night with Sier, or was it Sier who got lucky? Like father like son. (but with Dis in Flinn's case)
Kili and Tauriel worked out a few things as well, the where they would live, and kind of what she would do. Undecided, but she knows she has options.
Things should start hopping now!
Guest Reviews:
abc: You weren't late...you had all weekend to review. And sorry you were sick! It was Flinn who spilled the beans last time, so I figured it was Frerin's turn. ha ha. Yes, Flinn and Dis made their appearance...well, sort of...Kili had to come to them. ha ha. And yes, Tuesday is the bride price reveal. Thanks.
Feu d'Argent: I think most of Fili's fighting lessons with Sier end in kissing and stuff. ha ha. That's right, it is harder to stay home and worry than be the one gone! Perfect advice, the first to declare their love is the one who will be least scrutinized when the next ones declare theirs. ha ha. Kili would probably get kicked in the chest by the cow and break a few ribs and then his wedding night would be ruined. ha ha. Thanks.
Emrfangirl: Yes, everything is out in the open and the lads will be working off their penance for a while. Tilda is not to be messed with...she gets even! Yep, got to get those two hitched...however, that bride price might be a bit of a stickler. That will be tomorrow. Tune in and find out what havoc that will cause. As for the 'talk' we will see...but I doubt Fili will want to tell ANYONE they had it. ha ha.
Aranel Mereneth: I hope I got all the reactions right...I think Fili would have been shocked and scared out of his mind to hear his wife went to battle. Thanks.
gginsc: So you read in the morning when you wake up, do ya?
