"Do they feel any better?" Sanji asked as he finished redressing Zoro's arm wounds in the clinic located on the second floor. They had managed to sneak their way there without any mishaps, only hearing the sound of distant shrieking which they assumed to be Usopp fighting for his life. Thankful for his distraction, they took their time in taking care of Zoro's arms. They were now cleaned and re-bandaged. Sanji had tried to get Zoro to take a pain killer as well but she refused, saying it would only make her sluggish.

"Hey, shouldn't we get out there?" Zoro asked as Sanji slipped his arms around her waist and was pulling her closer.

"Why?" Sanji whispered, leaning in towards her lips.

"Because Usopp is being chased and your brother is a psychopath."

"Okay, just a minute…" Sanji seized her lips.

Zoro slammed her heel down onto Sanji's foot, causing the man to yelp and curse, stumbling backwards.

"Not the time for that, dartbrows. Let's go kick some Vinsmoke ass then meet your mom." Zoro headed for the door.

"You broke my fucking foot!" Sanji snarled at her, still holding his foot.

"Oh stop exaggerating, come on lets go."

"I'm serious… it snapped…." Sanji said, pale. He leaned against the desk and cautiously slipped off his boot and took a look at his foot.

"…You're joking… right…?" Zoro leaned over to look at his foot. It was already turning red and swelling. "Well… would you look at that… huh… guess my legs are more powerful than I knew." Zoro nodded, impressed with herself.

"I'm going to kill you…" Sanji turned his murderous glare on the swordsman. She laughed awkwardly.

"H-hey… now… we're even right…I can't use my arms…"

"That wasn't me!"

"Ha.. ha… erm… well, sorry! I'll make it up to you!"

"How the hell are you going to make this up to me, you meathead!? You broke my fucking foot while my crazy brother is rampaging the castle trying to kill us!"

"To be fair, I think he only wants to kill you."

"I swear to god Zoro…"

"Eheh, right, umm… I'll bandage it for you…"

"And let you break the other one!? No, you stand over there in the corner and think about what you just did!"

"Y-yeah…"

Luffy sat down at the small table across from Sanji's mother, Sora. He looked around, impressed with the room with all the gold trimmings and fancy looking art on the walls. There were also two large windows that led out to a nice balcony, and they were open to let in the breeze. Luffy tossed the sword he was carrying, Law's sword, onto a nearby couch before drumming his fingers on the table and humming, waiting for the food to come out.

"So, Captain Luffy, I suppose you're here to talk with my son, Sanji?" Sora asked.

"I'm here to take him back with us." Luffy replied, grinning as he saw a maid walk in with a tray of tea and crackers.

"Oh, well that won't be necessary… Sanji is very happy here." Sora explained as Luffy started shoving food in his mouth.

"He is?"

"Of course, he's my son. I know him best." Sora smiled.

"What about his dream?"

"His dream?" Sora looked perplexed, "You mean about that swordsman? That was just a temporary fling, he can find another girl here." Luffy frowned, his cheeks full of crackers. He watched her a moment, then grabbed the last piece of cheese and crammed it in his mouth.

"You don't seem like a good mom."

"W-what?!" Sora looked shocked at the bluntness from the captain. She grit her teeth and took in a breath. "Whatever do you mean..? I love my Sanji the most in the world, I would do anything for him."

"I dunno, I mean, I figure knowing your son's dream is the basic of the basics…" Luffy replied.

"I do know! I know everything about him!" Sora started ticking off her fingers, "I know about him liking to cook, and how he used to visit his mother every day! I know he likes that swordsman, and I know all his crewmember names. I know his favorite food and color!"

"That sounds just like a list of stuff to me." Luffy rubbed some crumbs off his face and shrugged. Sora's eyes flashed with anger.

"Look here! I spent a year studying everything I could about that damn brat so that I would be chosen to be the queen! I even know his favorite bedtime stories from when he was a child!" She shouted back, slamming her hand on the small table and making the silverware clink.

"Wait… you studied him?" Luffy tilted his head, trying to comprehend what was going on. Sora's face turned red with alarm. Realizing she had slipped up, Sora jumped up from her seat and reached down, pulling out a blade she had hidden on a sheath on her skirt covered legs.

"Well… we would have gotten rid of you anyway…" She said, lunging at the captain with her knife.

Law felt the barrel he was enclosed in hit something and then stop moving. He pressed his ear against the side and listened intently. He could hear the sounds of life: birds, a distant voice, crickets. Thinking it was safe, he knocked the lid off of the barrel and peered out. The barrel had washed ashore a relatively large looking island. He stepped out of the barrel and stretched, working out the kinks from his confinement. It was obvious their plan had gone horribly astray, and now he was on some random island in the middle of the ocean with no way to get back or contact anyone. And he didn't have his sword.

First things first, he made his way towards the distant sounds he heard. It was almost a bustling sound, like that of a town. He immediately noticed a worn path from the beach and followed it until he saw the makings of a town in the distance.

When he was close enough to see the structures, he felt weird. Something seemed off but he couldn't place it. He approached cautiously.

"WE HAVE A VISITOR!" Yelled an extremely happy sounding voice that Law could barely react to before he was hit from behind the knees. He fell backward and before he could register what was happening, he found himself riding on the back of a man who was running towards the town on all fours, carrying him like a horse carrying its rider.

The man skidded to a stop once they entered an empty looking town a few moments later and Law immediately jumped off the man.

"What the hell are you doing!?" He questioned the man. The man honked, which seemed like his own way of laughing.

"Welcome visitor! You are the 35th visitor to the Island of Human Objects! We hope you have a pleasant time! Please check out our massage chairs in the visitor's center!" The man said excitedly before running off down the street, still on all fours. Law froze and looked around slowly, suddenly realizing that the town wasn't empty but simply full of people pretending to be things.

"Oh god…"

"Are you sure you're okay?" Zoro asked as she looked down at Sanji's bandaged foot.

"Well I've certainly felt better…" Sanji replied, glaring at her as he limped towards the door.

"Sorry… I really had no idea I was that strong."

"You're freakishly strong."

"Heh. Thanks."

"That wasn't a compliment."

"Sounded like one. Want to lean on me?"

"I'll be fine… Let's just go." Sanji sighed.

"Is there anything else I can do?" Zoro asked, looking him up and down and contemplating throwing the man over her shoulder. She moved towards him and Sanji immediately raised his hands.

"Oh no you don't… You stay three feet away from me."

"I said I was sorry…" Zoro pouted. Sanji broke at how cute she looked and fought to not grin at her but was failing miserably.

"Damn it… it's fine. I know it wasn't on purpose, but you gotta be more aware of your strength before you kill me…" Sanji reached over and patted her head. She beamed up at him. So cute. Sanji found himself humming happily and his body rocked back and forth slightly as he tried to hold himself back.

"You know…" He continued, "There is something you could do…"

"What's that?" She asked, tilting her head. Sanji grinned wider.

"A kiss. On the cheek." Sanji pointed to his cheek. Zoro raised her eyebrow.

"That's it? Sure." Zoro got up on her toes and kissed his cheek. Sanji immediately spun in a circle and laughed happily.

"Wow, look I'm healed!"

"Idiot." Zoro rolled her eye but chuckled and pushed him towards the door.

Usopp found himself doing what he did best, running away from things. This time, however, it was Ichiji, Sanji's red-haired older brother.

"Stop running and face me straw-hat!" Ichiji yelled as he ran after the marksman.

"No thanks!" Usopp shouted back as he skidded at the end of the hall and took a right, trying to lose the angry Vinsmoke. At the end of the hall were three doors. He jumped out the window.

And landed on a man with startling green hair that he had met before.

"Ahh! Yonji!" Usopp immediately raised his arms in defense as the youngest Vinsmoke brother brushed himself off and got up. Yonji raised his curly brows in surprise and stared at Usopp for a moment, clearly deep in thought. He looked at Usopp's curly brows.

Yonji started to panic. This man was clearly a Vinsmoke, due to his curly brows and impressive outfit. However, Yonji couldn't place him. Was he a distant relative? The man did know Yonji's name…

"U-uh.. Hello… again…" Yonji smiled awkwardly as he tried to place who Usopp was exactly. A cousin?

Usopp noticed immediately that Yonji wasn't moving to attack him. He lowered his arms. This man was clearly an idiot. He put his hand on his hips and puffed out his chest.

"You don't remember me? It is I, Hyakuji! I'm Reiju's husband!"

"Reiju has a husband?!" Yonji gawked. "W-when?! Oh crap… I didn't go to the wedding… I forgot!" Yonji looked very scared at that thought and kept bowing his head.

"You should be sorry… You have disgraced the family name!"

"I'm so sorry brother! Is there anything I can do for you?!"

"Of course! I want you to take me to Sanji's room! Oh, but first, some food would be nice."

"Of course! I'll take you to the kitchens! Oh but if you're looking for Sanji, he's probably with the clone. I'll take you to her room!"

"Clone?"

"Yeah, the clone of our mother. She's been brainwashing Sanji so that he will help us as we take over all of the North Blue together with the marines and make the Germa Kingdom even more powerful so that we can eventually take over the entire world."

"Hmm… that's some very interesting exposition." Usopp said, rubbing his chin.

"I just wanted to make everything clear for you brother."

"You guys are really doing a take over the world thing?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Now where is that food?" Usopp wrapped his arm around Yonji's shoulder and the man led him into the back entrance of the castle.

"You ready to meet my mom?" Sanji asked as they stopped in front of Sora's room. Zoro shrugged.

"Sure."

"Any last questions?"

"Nope."

"Really, you're okay?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"Uh… well usually, people kinda freak out before they meet their…. Significant other's parents."

"Why? Is she strong?"

"No… nevermind. Let's just go." Sanji raised his hand to knock but before he could, he heard a loud crashing noise. Alarmed, he quickly opened the door and both he and Zoro entered, alert.

What they saw was Luffy standing in the middle of the room, looking angry, and Sora looked to have crashed into a couch with great force, as it was broken in half. She was bleeding from her head and looked enraged.

"Mom!" Sanji shouted in alarm, rushing over to her side. Sora's face immediately changed, and she looked pained and panicked.

"Sanji-dear!" She cried out, raising her battered arm to her son.

"I said I'll stand!" Law practically shrieked (in a manly way) as a man-chair reached out to pull him down again. He was incredibly unnerved in this town and wanted to leave as soon as possible. However, he was hungry and needed to secure a boat.

The townspeople of the Island of Human Objects were very nice, too nice. They kept offering their services to him, insisting that he was tired from his journey. A man-bed had been following him around, insisting that he take a nap before Law ended up kicking him, to which the man thanked him for 'using him to vent out his anger'.

Now the townspeople were trying to feed law. Fortunately, it seemed the food in this town was actual food. Unfortunately, everything else was human.

"Please, you must be tired, take a seat!" The human chair insisted, patting his lap with a free hand.

"No." Law replied, looking increasingly stressed out.

"Well you must be hungry. Here, drink up." A woman-spoon replied as she held some warm soup in her hands and raised it towards his lips.

"Have some grapes! They're good for you!" Said a man-fork as he reached his fingers, each with a grape on them, towards him. Law quickly backed away, but stumbled over the man-chair's leg, causing him fall onto the ground.

"Look, he wants to rest! Let's go blanket team!" Shouted another man as he and his companions shuffled over, trying to cover former Shichibukai.

A loud screech was heard throughout the lands.