A/N: Remember, I'm posting a chapter a day- I think when I posted three at one time a while back some people accidentally skipped the first two because the view count ended up a lot higher on the third one, so make sure you aren't missing any!
After Zim's brief stop, they continued to the mall. Zim kicked at a pigeon that almost tripped him and Dib had to stop to take a picture of a squirrel that was patterned like a skunk, but it was otherwise uneventful- at least until they reached the parking lot.
A car was backing out, but Zim was ranting on to Dib about how the weasels refused to enter the sewer system when he tried to drop them off and didn't notice it. Dib only noticed half a second before it would have hit them and yanked Zim out of the way. "Hey, watch where you're going, jerk!" He looked down at Zim to make sure he hadn't been brushed by it. Zim was in wide-eyed shock for a moment before immediately whipping out a laser pistol and melting the back end of the car to a heap of steaming metal. "Zim!"
"What? They almost hit me!"
They heard screaming, and Dib practically dragged Zim across the blacktop as he ran towards the mall entrance. "This is why I don't take you anywhere, you know!"
"They almost hit me!" Zim emphasized as the doors opened in front of them. He glanced back to see a woman kicking at the side of her vehicle before starting to run towards them. "Faster- hey!"
Dib decided to cut out trying to scrape out the soles out of Zim's boots when tugging him along and scooped Zim up instead, rushing through a cluster of Girly Rangers and dodging a splash of water from a kid who was chucking coins into the fountain like they were baseballs before ducking into the nearby Hawt Talk. Zim was glaring up at him. "When I said faster, I meant move faster, not pick me up like a bag of-"
"Your legs are tiny, she might have caught us." Dib said, before shoving a hand over Zim's mouth and sinking into the hoodies decorated after animes. The woman was stomping past the entrance, glancing into every one of the stores.
Zim licked Dib's hand, slimy tongue soaking the palm almost immediately, and Dib nearly yelped, glaring down at him. "Quit it!" He squeezed Zim against him, and the irken squirmed around, shaking the fabric around them like a beehive had been thrown in the middle of the rack.
The woman poked her head in, but winced at the loud rock music and passed Hawt Talk over to check for them elsewhere. Dib released Zim's mouth, wiping his hand on his shirt. "You're gross, you know that?"
"Am not!" Zim wiggled his way out of Dib's loosened grip. "Now, if I remember right, the infant things are across the way. Gir used to like the pacifiers."
"...Not gonna ask." Dib stood up, glancing at the employee balanced precariously on a ladder trying to put up a box of figurines. They didn't seem to have noticed him. "Alright, let's-"
"Look at this!" Zim was rummaging through the jewelry.
"Zim, you don't even have ears, what would you do with earrings?"
"Not those, this one!" It was a silver necklace with a little vial full of purple glitter on the end. Zim held it up, letting it swing like a pendulum. "I want it."
"Seriously? You don't strike me as a necklace sort of guy."
"It's sparkly."
"Sparkly," Dib said flatly, but Zim was turning it over in his hands. "Fine, how much is it?"
"Ten dollars."
Dib pulled out his wallet, rifling through it. He had about four hundred dollars in it, so that was probably fine. "Alright, here. At least you didn't just run off with it." He handed over a ten and two ones for tax, and Zim practically flounced over to the counter.
"You! Wage-slave!"
"Yeah?" The girl turned around, nearly falling off the ladder as she did before descending. "Did you find everything okay?"
"Yes, yes, it was fine." Zim shoved the money at her.
"Okay, I just need to scan it." Zim held the tiny vial protectively for a moment before reluctantly allowing her to scan it and give it back. "That'll be $11.10." She picked up the money Zim had dropped on the counter, and Dib noticed how the streak of blonde in her hair had started growing out, leaving a patch of brown near the top of her skull as she counted out the change. "Alright, there's your change, ninety cents. Have a nice day."
Zim pulled the necklace over his head, smiling to himself as he watched the light filter through the small vial while Dib tucked the change back into his wallet.
"Are you ready to actually get what we need now?" Dib asked, and Zim crossed his arms.
"Fine, fine." Zim scanned across the mall, over the heads of the other patrons. "Are there carts here?"
Dib shook his head. "No, but we probably won't get anything really heavy. I'll come back when I have the car. Right now we're just looking for clothes and stuff for the room." He pulled out the coupon book, steering into the nearest shop that had baby clothes. Zim immediately made a beeline for the rack full of pink clothes, grabbing one that had little lace on the collar that kind of looked like his uniform.
Dib rummaged around in the boy's clothes, finding a green bodysuit that had a cute little dinosaur on it and a red one that said 'just arrived' with a typical Grey design under a ufo. He picked out a few simple blue and a few purple ones, while Zim looked around on the opposite side of the store.
They met at the display table in front of the register. Zim had grabbed four different shirts in various states of pink, (one with a unicorn) and glanced over Dib's choices. "Hmm… not bad."
Dib waved the little alien one in front of him, Zim stared it for a moment before starting to laugh.
"I'll take that as you liking it?"
"I'll allow it," Zim snickered, and Dib grinned as he rummaged through the coupons.
"I mean, it'll be true." He pulled out a pair that would take ten dollars off and dumped the heap on the counter. The employee started to scan through them.
"Is there anything else?"
"I think that's it for here," Dib said, handing over the coupons, and the man just shrugged and scanned them too, piling the clothes into a single bag before taking Dib's money.
"Okay, so we'll want toys next," Dib said. "I have no idea where those are." He walked over to the mall's map, squinting as he scanned over the glowing image.
"Second floor," Zim said, spotting it first. He wrapped his fingers around Dib's wrist, starting to march off at a brisk pace. Dib stumbled a little, Zim's iron grip forcing him to bend slightly before he matched the irken's speed.
"You're going to have to keep these from Gir," Dib warned, but Zim just made a 'pssssh' sound.
"I know how to hide things."
"I can just keep this stuff in my room, actually, I don't use two of the lower dresser drawers."
"The less you clutter up my base, the better," Zim said, trying to locate the toy store.
"The map said it was next to Target Practice."
"I know, don't- ah, there!" Zim nearly dislocated Dib's shoulder as he turned and started towards the right shop. He nearly knocked over a kid playing on his phone on the way, and Dib threw back an apology as they entered the store.
There was music playing that was obnoxiously cheery and that Dib pretty much immediately hated, but there was a section for 'newborn to two' near the front, so he supposed he couldn't complain too much. Zim picked up a large pair of plastic keys, shaking them so they clacked together.
"What are these for? They don't look like they'd fit any lock."
"I'unno, colors maybe?" Dib said, looking over the shelf. "This one looks cool." It was a dragonfly with four differently-patterned wings and little flaps to open and close. Zim scoffed.
"I don't know what you consider cool, but- ooh!" There was a large plush bee, and Zim poked it. "Hm, knowing your enemy can be a good tactical defense…"
"Sure, we can get the bee," Dib said, bemused, picking up the dragonfly as well as a soft rattle.
Zim insisted on examining each individual thing in the section, but the only other one he liked was a cloth play-area with little knobs and buttons, as well as a tiny mirror on one side. Dib grabbed a stacking ring toy as well, paying for it and adding the bags to his arms. Zim only carried the stuffed bee, but pretended to be tired when Dib tried to pass him one of the other bags. (And Dib knew it was pretending from how perky the rest of him was, but it wasn't worth the loss of energy an argument would cause.)
They spotted the lady still searching for them when they left the store, but Zim held up his bee and Dib tried to flatten his hair, bags in front of his face, and she huffed and headed for the exit, presumably in defeat.
"What's that smell?" Zim asked, and Dib sniffed the air.
"I think we're by the food court."
"I want snacks."
Dib pulled his wallet out. "I think I've got enough left, just try not to go crazy with-" Zim snatched the money and took off before Dib could even finish his sentence. Dib trudged after him. "Great, of course he leaves me to carry everything, that little…" He flexed his fingers in the air, as if pretending to strangle Zim, but stared when Zim came back only a minute later with a pair of churros, handing half of one to Dib. "Oh, uh… thanks. Was there no line or did you skip?"
"Wouldn't you like to know?"
"Okay, so you skipped." Dib took a bite- it was nice and warm. Well, there were worse evils in the world.
Besides, seeing the smile on Zim's face as he licked up the cinnamon sugar was worth it.