It had still been early dusk when Caius and Elle had started down to the pool below the waterfall, but the narrow canyon walls worked to block out most of the light once they were at the bottom. Elle wasn't too worried about it. They had used this place more than once, and she was familiar with the layout. The pool didn't get deep, and there was just enough light left for her to see it hadn't gained any new inhabitants.
Still, she knew Caius wasn't as used to the chill in the air as she was, and it was colder down there too. Before she turned to get into the water, she gestured to the circle of rocks their team used for fires often. "Do you want me to start a small fire while you wait?"
He looked back with a frown. "Would it not bother you?"
She chuckled. "I know you would sit with your back to it. I might not trust Laer down here with me, but I know you keep your word. It gets way colder than this where I'm from, but I know it would be nice to take the chill from the night."
He finally gave her a lopsided smile. "We won't be long, but it would be good while we are here."
She gave him a nod, and they gathered a few dried limbs and grasses from the area. It wasn't long before she had them crackling. As soon as that was done, Caius settled with his back to it, and Elle didn't hesitate to strip down and head into the water. It was colder than she expected, but she gritted her teeth and dunked her head anyway. It was only a few moments before she got used to it, and she smiled as she started running her fingers through her hair.
For several minutes the only sound was the soft splash of the water and the crackle of the tiny fire. Elle let the near silence relax her as she worked the knots from her tresses. It wasn't until she growled at a particularly nasty one that Caius spoke up.
"I have noticed that you have become more at home here in Paddra. That is a good thing. Many of the people look up to you, both among the warriors and the citizens."
Elle paused in her efforts with the knot. "Yeah, I feel like I'm making a home for myself, but I get the impression that isn't the point you're trying to make."
Caius chuckled at her perception. "No, it is not. From the beginning, I had believed this was to be temporary for you. I had thought you were to be sent home after a short while, once your goal was finished."
Elle frowned. That was a touchy subject and one that she tried to avoid. Most of the time, Caius never tried to pin her down about it, and she respected him enough to not blow him off. She sighed as she tried to answer. "I don't know how I would get home since I don't know how I got here, but I kind of had the impression that this was supposed to be a job for me to finish as well. Whether I would get a ticket home like the one that got me here or not once it was done is still something up in the air. For now, I'm doing what I can. There is no point in thinking about things I have no control over."
There was silence for several moments as Elle looked over to see Caius' back lit by the flames between them. She watched as the fire played shapes across his shoulders and wondered if the shadows that remained were as heavy for him as they were for her.
She saw his shoulders finally drop a little as he spoke again. "Is that why you no longer speak of your home or your brother?"
Elle barely bit back a curse. Even though she didn't want to shut him out, that was a subject that she just couldn't handle. Not if she wanted to stay sane. Still, she had to tell him something. "Yeah. And I can't talk about it now either." She paused and took a deep breath when she saw him tense. To try and head him off, she blurted out the first thing she could think of. "Why don't you tell me about your family? Where did you grow up? I don't think I've ever heard anyone mention anyone else from the Sol clan."
When his shoulders tensed further, Elle began to wonder if there was a good reason he hadn't said anything. She could understand it if there were. She almost felt like telling him it didn't matter when she heard him sigh. "You have not heard of any because there are no other Sols in Paddra. It is a story not many know."
"Caius, it's-"
"Do not feel as though you have wronged me for asking. I have often asked the same of you." Elle was at least relieved to hear his voice was not strained as he continued.
"First, I must start with the fact that not all of the people born to the Farseer tribe ascribe to the belief that Etro is worthy of worship. Some believe having faith in the Goddess of Death is asking for trouble. Some of those that decide to leave live solo lives, but there have been a few times that enough gather to form small villages that dot the surrounding area. We do not bother them, and they pretend we no longer exist."
That made sense to Elle. People were people, no matter where you went. Not everyone was going to agree on everything. That would be insane. She didn't get to say that aloud before he kept going. "I grew up in a village such as that. It wasn't that I believed Etro was evil. I honestly did not think of it one way or another, but my parents had left Paddra behind before I was born. Yeul was from the same village."
Elle gasped. Now that was news. She hadn't realized the Seeress was not born in Paddra. Caius started to turn back at the noise but froze and turned away again. She was grateful when he didn't say anything about it and just continued his story. "I am sure that is strange to hear. It is not unheard of for the Seeress to be born outside of the city, but it is unusual."
Elle felt a knot tighten in her stomach when she saw his shoulders seem to hunch over. "The elder brother of the Nsu clan was my best friend. From the time Yeul was born, there was uncertainty. It was not confirmed that she was the next seeress until she was three. At that time-"
He cut himself off, and Elle reached out her hand. She let it fall uselessly back into the water when Caius sighed and shook his head. "To the people in the village, the Seeress was the embodiment of all they found appalling. Her parents could not- they were going to handle the execution themselves. Galen, her older brother, refused to allow it at the expense of having to fight off several of the other villagers. He managed to get her away, but he was not unhurt."
He took a deep breath before he continued. "He brought her to me and secured a promise that I take her and leave. I was not sure what to do, but I could not condone what was planned. She was so young and defenseless. I saw what my friend had been willing to do; what he had given his life for. At that moment, I pledged to keep her safe. It was only a few weeks after we left the isolated village that we met Praes. He had been looking for the new Seeress since the old one had died. When he found out what had happened, he instated me as his apprentice. There are still days when I believe this title belongs to Galen, but since he is not here, I will wear it with pride."
Elle didn't even stop to think about her actions. She had never known such a deep connection existed between the two of them. Neither of them acted like it. Granted, Yeul had been very young, but still. It made Caius' dedication all the more heartbreaking. To know that he had left a family behind and had lost his best friend as well. No matter how many years ago that was, it still had to hurt. That was a feeling Elle was more familiar with than she wanted to be. She knew what it was like to have to be strong for the world because you didn't have a choice. To bury your pain because hurting wasn't an option.
She was out of the water and had grabbed her shirt before her head had caught up to her heart. She didn't even try to pull it over her wet hair and body, she just covered her front before she knelt next to Caius and put her hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry. I know that doesn't change anything, but I wish it could. I know how hard that had to be. How hard it still must be. I'm glad you shared it with me."
Caius' head shot up, and his eyes widened as he locked them with hers. When he noticed her dripping hair, his gaze flicked down and caught on the grip she had on her shirt that barely covered her front. He didn't need to look lower to know that she was probably still indecent. He knew he should not, for both their sakes.
Although he was a hardened warrior, no matter how many men he had led, how many monsters he had killed, how many women he had declined or bedded, he could still feel his face heating as he forced his eyes to stay locked onto hers instead of trying to satisfy his morbid curiosity. He swallowed thickly before he spoke. "Elle, are you finished?"
Elle was momentarily fascinated by the sight of Caius' cheeks turning such a charming color of red. She had never expected to see such a thing and briefly wondered why it happened. At least until her brain finally caught up and her own face worked to outdo his. "No!"
Her voice came out in nearly a screech, and she tried to calm it as he quickly turned back around. She scrambled back and dropped the now wet shirt before she practically jumped back into the water. Once she was covered by the cooling waves, she felt it was safe to speak again. "Sorry. I don't know- I mean- I guess I wasn't thinking. Just forget that, okay."
Caius cleared his throat before he spoke again. "I appreciate your sentiment. I do not share that often. Only Praes knows the whole story. The others only know that Yeul and I are both from the same village. The rest is something I do not usually discuss."
Elle was grateful that he was pretending her little mishap hadn't happened, but his words left her floundering. Why had he shared with her if he never had with his other friends? Surely that violated the wall he tried to keep up between them. It took her several moments to figure out what to say. "I understand not wanting to talk about something like that. Don't feel like you need to share more just because I ask things out of ignorance."
Caius didn't respond right away, and Elle wondered if she had said something wrong when she saw him shake his head slightly. When the silence continued to stretch, she felt a pit form in her stomach, but she could also feel her skin starting to wrinkle. She hurriedly finished cleaning and made her way back out of the water.
She noticed Caius tense when she grabbed her clothes, but he didn't turn or say anything. Elle wondered if she had hurt him in some way, and played her words back several times. She began to wonder if he had felt she was telling him that she didn't want to know. That wasn't the case at all, and she resolved to tell him so.
Once she was dressed, she called his name softly. He stood and turned to her, but the words she was about to say froze as he almost immediately put his hands on her shoulders. His eyes looked into hers so intently that she almost forgot what she had been thinking, and his voice was so low she leaned into his touch to hear him better.
"Elle, compassion is not a weakness. Not for you give it, nor for you to receive it. I do not talk about my past often because it could be harmful to the Seeress, not because it would bother me to have my friends know. Especially not you. Someday, I hold to the hope that you would see me in the same light."
Elle was frozen. Caius was the most open that she had ever seen him. All his walls were gone, and there was that same something in his eyes that she had seen a couple of times before. It was something that both thrilled and terrified her. What exactly was he trying to tell her? Surely it wasn't what it sounded like. They were friends. Good friends. That was all she could afford. Hell, she couldn't even afford that really.
It was several seconds later that she finally found her voice. "You already know more about me than anyone here. If I open up to anyone, it will be you."
Caius sighed and dropped his hands. He gave her a half-smile and shook his head. He looked past her to the water and then up to the sliver of moon that was peeking over the canyon wall. With a sigh, he turned back. "I should finish as well so we can return. It is already far colder than I would like."
In different circumstances, Elle might have laughed at his intolerance to the slight chill in the air, but this time, she barely managed a smile. The wall had come back between them, and she had the uncomfortable sensation that this time, it wasn't because Caius had put it there. She finally managed a nod. "I'll keep watch."
That was all that was said as the two of them moved to switch the positions they had just been in. It did not take Caius half as long as it had taken Elle, though a good portion of that was the fact that he found the water to be freezing. Once he was dressed, he reluctantly started to put the fire out as he called to his companion. "We should return. You can go first. I know you are familiar with the climb, and the moon is nearly full, but I will follow in case you have any issues. Be mindful of loose rocks."
Elle rolled her eyes at his admonition and put aside the unknown emotions that had been roiling in her chest. She slipped back into the teasing smile she was most familiar with as she spoke. "First off, I could probably climb this cliff with my eyes closed, but even if I couldn't, what could you do to stop me from falling? We'd probably both end up at the bottom." Her grin widened as she gestured to the water. "At least the pool would break our fall."
Caius looked into her eyes for a moment. She had no idea what he was looking for, but he finally shook his head and returned her grin. "Where we would both die of hypothermia, no doubt."
Elle nearly doubled over in laughter. It was several seconds later that she stood and wiped her eyes. She then clapped him on the shoulder and headed to the cliff. "You have no idea what cold actually is. Have you ever seen snow?"
He fell into step beside her and gave her a curious look. "I have heard of it from traders that travel far and wide, but I have never seen it. I was told it is frozen rain. That sounds unpleasant."
Elle paused and looked at him with a chuckle. "No, freezing rain is a thing too, and so is sleet, which is a mix of snow and rain. But snow is something else. Water crystallizes in the upper atmosphere before it falls. Yes, it is cold enough to make you fondly remember and wish for the days you were sweating your ass off, but it's also beautiful. At least when it first falls. Everything is covered in a pristine layer of white. It's like a whole new world for just a little while. It almost looks magical, and even the trees seem to be different. I hate the cold, but I like winter. Strange, I know."
Caius stared at her for several seconds before he lowered his voice. "Listening to you, I find that I would like to see that at least once."
She blinked up at him before her eyes widened. She hadn't realized how close she had gotten to him, or how lost in her memories she had been. He was giving her that look again, and she couldn't handle it. Instead, she turned to face the cliff. "I doubt you'll ever see it here, but maybe you'll get to travel someday. You never know. Gran Pulse can't all be like this."
She ignored his soft sigh as he followed her up the cliff. "Perhaps you are correct."
That was the last thing said about it as they made their way back to camp. It did not take them long to get settled. Neither of them paid much mind to any of the others, or to the fact that they did not get the teasing they had expected. Laer was just as lost in thought as both of them. It was only a short time later that they all turned in.
None of them had noticed that Ingens had not left the spot he had taken up the whole time. He only returned when everyone else fell into their bedrolls. He was wearing a frown as he looked to where the Apprentice and Emissary were sleeping, but his eyes were thoughtful. He shook his head as he too turned to find sleep. They all had one more long day before they would have a chance to relax for the next week.
A/N: Now we get to see a little more about Caius. And Yeul. I wanted to give a heads up that the next chapter will (should) include some major fluff, so I hope you are all looking forward to it as much as I am. Thanks for reading!