January 27
Rosemary exited the mercantile feeling down and out, and perhaps, if she were honest, a bit enraged. Wasn't it enough to have young Emily Montgomery mention her impending guest? But no, also Clara, and now of all people, Ned Yost, had to nose into her personal business. It was beyond irritating, it was… preposterous! Her hand shook, causing her to loose a grip on the pie box. She watched helplessly, her other hand holding the canister of tea and brown bag, as it began to slide from her arms.
"Oh, careful!" Dottie rushed across the boardwalk and quickly scooped up the pie box before it fell to the ground. "You sure have your hands full. Here, let me help." Dottie took the canister of tea from her hands as well as the brown bag containing her thread and tucked them into her basket. "I sure was hoping I'd run into you. I've brought you two dozen of my oatmeal raisin cookies." She motioned to the basket. "I thought you might need extra for your guest—"
Rosemary groaned. "Not you too."
A confused look came over Dottie's face. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"There's the gooseberry pie, the extra canister of blackberry tea, even Emily Montgomery!" She stomped her foot. "I just wish everyone would stay out of my business."
Dottie pursed her lips and Rosemary prepared for her sharp retort. But none came. Instead, she felt Dottie's gaze on her.
After a long moment, Dottie spoke, more gently than expected. "You know what? You look like you could use a cup of tea."
Her entire body softened. Here she had snapped at Dottie so, yet her friend was extending her a friendly invitation. She wanted to accept, oh, how she did, but it had already been much too eventful of a morning around town. "As nice as that sounds, all I want to do is go home. It's been an… exhausting morning."
"You're sure? There's nothing a good cup of tea can't fix." Dottie's eyes pleaded with her.
Perhaps, she should consider it? No, the last thing she'd want to do was walk into Abigail's cafe again.
She shook her head. "We're going over to the new place and continue working on a few projects once Lee comes home."
Dottie smiled. "Okay, then. I'll walk with you as far as the church. Mr. Jameston is out at the livery and I can catch a ride home from there. How about you tell me what has you so twisted up in knots this morning?"
She frowned. 'Twisted up in knots' to say the least. Her belly was feeling quite nauseous, her back and neck stiff with tension.
Dottie linked arms with her as they walked out past the town and towards the schoolhouse, where spirals of gray smoke rose from the chimney and ascended into the white clouds above, as they caught up on the going-ons in their lives. Before she knew it, she had spilled the details of the morning— of the gooseberry pie, the complimentary tin of blackberry tea, and even Emily's innocent remarks.
Dottie patted her hand. "I don't see why all that would bother you so. Everyone cares for you."
They slowed their walking and stood, looking out at the frozen lake. Rosemary's eyes roamed the landscape, although not quite seeing it. "Have you ever kept a secret from someone you loved?"
She could feel Dottie's body tense at her question, then relax.
After a lengthy pause, she replied, "Well, to answer your question. Yes, I have. A few times, I have kept secrets from people I love. I convinced myself that perhaps I was sparing their feelings by not being upfront, but one thing I have learned, time and time again, is a secret has a way of coming out one way or another."
"That's the truth." She felt absolutely miserable.
"You haven't told Lee, have you?"
Her looked up, her heated cheeks giving the answer.
"Oh, Rosemary, I don't know your situation, or how Harriet fits into it…but I would hope you would know by now that Lee is nothing if not trustworthy. Whatever you have to confide in him, he will be understanding and accepting." She paused. "He's never given you reason to doubt him, has he?"
She shook her head. No of course not. She was the one who should know better. She just couldn't bring herself to mention Harriet's impending arrival because, well, honestly, it was going to open a whole Pandora's box of questions from her past. Things she'd much rather keep hidden away. Far, far away.
"I think you need to remember how the man has been by your side through thick or thin. You need to give him more credit. Remember?" Dottie reached over and tapped the ring that encircled Rosemary's hand, reminding her of the promise she and Lee had made to each other. She smiled, remembering their heart to heart talk nearly a year ago after Jack and Elizabeth's proposal, where he had reminded her that he was never, ever going anywhere. That even if everything changed, one thing never would: "How much I love you," he had said. "You promise?" She questioned, tears in her eyes. "It seems I already have," he replied and pointed to her ring and proceeded to give her a tender kiss. A tear slipped from her eye at the memory.
"He made a promise to you. To be right by your side, supporting you— his love steady and true. Now isn't that what you have wanted all your life?"
She nodded and brushed away a tear. It was what she had wanted all her life. Someone to love her madly, deeply, unconditionally— just the way Lee did. But the problem was laying her heart out there. It was so incredibly risky— this trusting another one so fully. She couldn't stand to have her heart thrown to the floor and shattered once more.
Dottie continued to walk with her, arm in arm, her friendship such a comfort as the thoughts raced through her head. The jangle of wagon wheels met their ears and they both turned around to see Mr. Jameston. Rosemary gripped onto Dottie's hand, not ready for her to go.
Dottie squeezed her hand back. "Just remember, you are the great Rosemary Coulter, woman extraordinaire."
Dottie flared her arms up in the air dramatically, drawing a small smile to Rosemary's lips. "You are up to this task, whatever it may hold, that is before you. Remember that, okay?"
Dottie gave her a gentle smile then reached over and patted her cheek with her gloved hand. For some reason, it made new tears rise to her eyes. Dottie hopped onto the wagon, leaving her alone with her thoughts. Perhaps, she was right. It was beyond time to have a heart to heart with her husband. She could only hope that he'd be as understanding and accepting as Dottie had claimed, and more importantly, that she could be as extraordinarily brave as Dottie believed she was.