Rosemary rounded the corner and noticed the curl of smoke coming from the schoolhouse chimney. Here it was a good hour after the dismissing of school, but it looked as if Elizabeth was still there, working away. Perhaps she could help her finish up and they could walk home together, catching up on chitchat about their day.
She walked up the steps and entered the school, the warmth from the little wood stove wrapping around her immediately. Elizabeth's head popped up from the papers she had been reading at her desk.
"Oh, my, what time is it?" She looked at the clock on her desk and sighed. "I was just trying to grade the last of these papers before heading home. I didn't worry you, did I?"
She shook her head. "No, I actually am just heading back from a visit with Mary."
"Oh, that sounds delightful."
"It was delightful. Say, do you need some help?" Rosemary nodded towards the papers stacked on her desk.
"I just have two more I'd like to look over before I go. But please, make yourself comfortable." Elizabeth motioned to an extra chair next to her desk.
She settled into the chair, her eyes naturally roaming to the papers.
"Alright if I take a look?"
"That's fine." Elizabeth looked up momentarily to reply and then continued to read the paper she was presently grading.
Rosemary picked the paper on the top of the pile. It looked as if the assignment was for the children to write one thing that had challenged them this past year and how it made them a better person. This one was from Robert and read:
"This last year I had a big challenge: My sister, Adeline, was born. Boy, she sure screams and cries a lot. I mean a lot. And don't get me started on what a messy eater she has become. But the main challenge for me was if my parents would still love me. I mean, here we got a new person in our house for them to clean up after, take care of. Would there be enough love for two of us? Well, it seems there is. I guess parents are good at sharing love with kids no matter how many they have. It's made me a better person because now, I can smile and play with Adeline and not worry she is stealing my parent's love."
Rosemary smiled at the innocence of the article, along with a few of the misspelled words, but the heart of the article tugged at her heart. Did parents really find a way to convey to their children unconditional love no matter what? She knew her father had, in the brief time she had him, but her mother and others…why they had let her play second fiddle to a host of other things. She never felt like she was of import, or secure in her love.
"Oh that was a favorite of mine." Elizabeth smiled and pointed her pen at the paper Rosemary was holding.
"Oh, yes, he did a good job on the assignment." She was still puzzling over the dynamics presented in the paper.
"I gave him a B. It had a few misspelled words, but he caught the essence of the assignment, don't you think?"
Rosemary nodded. "Is it unusual for children to feel this way?"
"No. I think most kids feel a bit jealous when a new baby is born in their family."
That was not quite what she had meant. She wanted to ask if most children feel secure in their parents love, for that was such an odd thought for her.
Elizabeth noted her silence and lowered the paper she was currently grading. "I know we have talked a little about your upbringing. I know you didn't have any siblings. I bet it was just grand to hold the attention of your parents without rival. My sisters and I have been rivals since our births, but also the best of friends."
"I wouldn't say that."
"Say what?"
"That I held their attention without rival. My father, yes, a thousand times yes, but he was yanked from my life before I even turned twelve."
"And your mother?"
"Well…"
"Yes?"
"Let's just say my mother was preoccupied with many things. I remember asking my father once why she didn't love me."
"What? No, Rosemary, really? That's horrible."
"I know it was horrible of me."
"No, its horrible that you ever felt that way. A child should never have to ask such things." Elizabeth clicked her tongue.
"Father reminded me of a young friend of mine who had come over the previous week, and how she had been in such a bad mood, she ended up cracking my tea pot during our tea party. He told me that often people struggle with things outside of themselves that have nothing to do with us, but we take it personally. He said that was the way it was with my mother."
"Oh what a shame."
Rosemary gave her a quizzical look.
"No, it really is a shame. No child should ever feel unloved or unwanted or unacceptable. Children are a gift from God."
Oh sure, she had heard these words before, but today, with her heart gaping open with old wounds, the words felt like a salve.
"You know what? I have something I'd like you to have. Let me find it around here somewhere." Elizabeth opened the drawer next to her and shuffled through the contents for a moment before pulling out a simple wooden frame.
"This was a gift I was given during a time I was feeling very alone, scared, and afraid. It was given to me by a very kind friend, who wanted me to remember that no matter where I was, I was safe within the love of God."
She flipped the frame around to a pretty tapestry of hand-embroidered flowers and a beautiful cursive writing. Elizabeth put it into her hands.
"Love never fails. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. I Corinthians 13:7-8." She read aloud, then turned to Elizabeth. "It is beautiful, but I could never take it."
"Oh yes you can. It's my gift to you. I want you to place it somewhere you will see it every day— by your bed, or even by the wash basin, but I want you to remember that is the way our Heavenly Father loves you, and I dare say, it is the way Lee loves you, too."
Rosemary looked down to the framed embroidery and smiled a most genuine smile. Perhaps she had not obtained love in abundance when she was young and under her mother's care, but now she had a different life: a life in the sweet community of Hope Valley, a life with the man who loved her more than he loved his own life, and the beginnings of a life of trusting more in the Lord. Was it possible for her to finally fully accept that kind of love? Could it be done before her baby was to arrive and the fears of the future became quite real? She sure hoped so.
