They didn't see each other at the hospital over the next few days and had communicated mostly by text. He didn't want to push her, he knew she was upset after the night at the bar and they needed to talk about it, which they would when she was ready. It was seeming like a long wait.

He stood in line waiting for a coffee and when he got to the cashier, he took the plunge and ordered two. Taking ownership of the streaming hot beverages he turned and headed to the elevators but not before running into Jo as she arrived for the day.

"Hey Melendez" she laughed. "Still working on getting Louise to talk to you" she said nodding towards the cups he was holding.

"We are talking" Neil argued back quickly. "Things are just a little bit..." he paused.

"Tense? Uncomfortable? Strained?"

"Yeah, all of the above" he agreed, grimacing. "I just need to try and focus on her for a bit. I'm off to see if she'll talk to me today. "

"That's understandable. I'd best let you go before those get cold" she said. "Good luck!"

X

Poking his head sheepishly around the door to the radiology department, he could see the back of her head as she stood talking to a colleague about how full their calendar was for today. He took a deep breath and stepped into the doorway, making eye contact with her colleague who in nodded at her to turn around. She gave him a small smile which gave him the courage to walk up to the desk.

"Have you got five minutes" he asked, holding out a cup.

"Not really..." she started before being interrupted by her colleague.

"She's got five minutes" she confirmed, taking the files that Louise was holding and nodding at Neil.

He mouthed a 'thank you' as Louise passed by, but got a scowl in return. He was in real trouble.

They sat next to each other in the empty Radiology waiting room, the first appointment wasn't for another thirty minutes. Both of them were hoping that the other would speak first but it seemed that wasn't going to work so Neil took a deep breath ready to start. As soon as he opened his mouth, she decided it was her turn.

"Why did you hit that guy?" she asked so quietly he almost didn't hear her.

"He hit me first" he replied. He knew that was no excuse and he sounded had like a petulant child, he would need to elaborate but at least the conversation was started.

"That's no excuse, you know. You could have walked away with your dignity in tact? Been the bigger man?" she asked with more confidence.

"He spoke to her like she was shit on his shoe" he shrugged. "She did nothing to deserve it except tell him to leave her alone."

"Dr Lim?" she questioned.

"Yes, Audrey. You were there, you know all this?" he said feeling confused.

"Why do you think she needs your protection? Do you have some sort of superhero complex, do you think everyone needs saving?"

"That's not it" he said, shaking his head. "I'd have done exactly the same for you, or anyone else. I would probably have done it for a total stranger" he argued. "Despite what you might be thinking right now, I'm a nice guy."

"I know you are" she sighed, not sounding any happier. "That's what's so annoying. It hard to actually find a nice guy these days, and to then realise they actually love someone else... it's..."

"I'm not in love with Audrey" he said turning in his seat so he could look right in to her eyes. "We've pretty much spent the last four years living in each others pockets. Kevin and Jo too. It's hard not to feel protective and have some sort of feelings for each other" he said taking her hand as she began to shift in her seat.

"But I am not in love with Audrey Lim" he said firmly. "I promise you."

She looked at him with a small smile.

"Thank you" she said. "I needed to hear you say that."

He nodded and they sat in silence for a few minutes more while they finished their drinks.

"Want to get dinner tonight? Just us?" he asked quietly and she nodded. "Pick you up at 7?"

"Sure, see you later" she said getting up to leave. He stood quickly with her and reached out to take her empty cup, covering her hand with his and giving a little tug towards him. "You know the rules" she said with a little smile, "none of that business at work."

"Just this once?" he asked, raising his eyebrows with a smirk. She couldn't help but let out a little laugh and nodded. There were no patients around and he was pretty hard to resist.

Tugging at her hand again, she stepped forward and he lowered his head to kiss her. It was just for a few seconds but they broke apart smiling at each other.

"See you later" he said as she turned and headed back into the office.

Dumping the cups in the trash, he headed up to the locker room to change for the procedure they had scheduled for this morning, feeling a lot lighter on his feet than he had just half an hour earlier.

X

The date with Louise went well and they got themselves back to their normal in almost no time at all. He really was trying that bit harder and if they knew they wouldn't be seeing each other for a few days because of Neil's hospital commitments, they would try and get lunch or breakfast together every couple of days instead.

The next test for the couple came a few months later. Audrey was her usual excited self about the upcoming release of Iron Man 3 and had already found a gap in Neil's schedule for them to go as they always did. He had questioned her about whether it was worth it arguing that normally the more movies they made on a subject, the worse they got. By the time they got to the third, they were usually rubbish.

Audrey's counter argument was that this was technically the seventh in the instalment and they had all been brilliant so far, therefore his point had no merit. He could only laugh and agree to the trip and left it in her hands to book the tickets.

The week building up to seeing the movie had been intense. The entire staff of residents had been pushed to their limits with what had seemed like a particularly busy period of emergencies and unexpected turns. Things finally seemed to be settling a little and Wednesday was the first scheduled night off he was actually able to take in almost a fortnight.

He and Louise had been catching breakfasts and lunches where they could but some days, all they could manage was a coffee on the benches outside. She had always understood the constraints that would come with dating a resident and he was still very grateful that she never seemed to be put out when he had to change their plants for the nth time.

"So, we can actually go out Wednesday night?" Louise asked with a smile as they were about to go their separate ways again. Neil needed to go and scrub in for a scheduled surgery so their time was limited.

"I'm only off Wednesday" he started and it dawned on him that the next thing he said was going to get him into trouble. "I'm going to the movies with Audrey" he finished bracing himself for what was coming next.

"Oh" she replied simply. "What are you going to see?"

"Iron Man 3. We've watched all the others together..."

"On your only night off?" she asked.

"We booked tickets almost two weeks ago. It wasn't meant to be my only night off. I was meant to have tonight too but that's not happening."

"But it is your only night off" she repeated flatly. "Can't you cancel?"

"No" he replied just as seriously, shaking his head.

She stood quickly with the intention of storming off but he took her hand instead.

"I'm off Saturday?" he suggested.

"Fine" she replied sharply. "I've got to go, my first appointment is in ten minutes" she said sharply before turning heel and walking away.

X

He contemplated on Louise's reaction briefly before scrubbing in, at which point he focused fully on the patient in front of him. Once the procedure was complete, he couldn't help but go back to their conversation. He couldn't call it a disagreement, she'd just highlighted the facts and he'd confirmed them. Neither of them had risen their voices to each other. He wasn't sure what to call it, but he knew it wasn't good.

He was lost in his thoughts as he automatically gathered his things and got ready to write his patient notes. Is this how it's going to be with any future relationships? The work and life balance wasn't coming easy to him. Was his friendship with Audrey going to be a permanent problem? His career was the most important thing to him right now, none of this should be getting in the way of that.

He picked Louise up on Saturday just as they had arranged and went to a small local restaurant for dinner. There was a strained silence on the ride over and they hadn't even greeted each other with a kiss.

Conversation through dinner was spotty and she didn't seem to be enjoying her food at all. She spent most of the evening pushing it around her plate but seemed to be enjoying the wine that came with it very much indeed.

After picking up the bill he drove them back to her place in silence again, despite his best efforts to start a conversation. Pulling up to the kerb, he turned off the ignition and turned to face her.

"Look Lou, I'm sorry about this week..." he started. Louise gasped, faking a surprise

"So you do realise you've done something wrong? Mr Perfect isn't so perfect after all?" she asked as Neil furrowed his brows, confused at what she was trying to do here. She rolled her eyes in exasperation. "Neil, are you sure you and Audrey are just friends?" she asked, looking at him directly, apparently gaining courage from the bottle of wine she had consumed this evening.

"Of course, I am. Nothing is going on between us. Where is this coming from?" he said defensively, not really wanting to go through all this again.

"We've been dating for about eight months now right? Are you actually serious about this? About us?" she asked him, ignoring his question in favour of her own.

"Yes, I am. I know the hospital can take up most of my time, but I really want us to work out and I am doing my best. Is everything okay?" he answered, sitting more upright.

Again, dodging his question, "it's not the hospital taking your time I'm worried about. I want you to cut ties with Audrey to give us a chance." she said plainly. He just sat there, dumbfounded. Was Louise really asking him to cut Audrey out of his life?

"Louise, Audrey is just a friend. I promise you, there is nothing going on between us." he assured her, repeating his words from earlier.

"So, you say. But are you willing to give up this so-called friendship to give our relationship a future?" she continued.

Yes, their dates had always been a little sporadic but he thought she understood the constraints that came with being a surgical resident. They had fun when they went out and they did enjoy each other's company. Was he expecting him to ditch his friends and just see her in any spare time he had?

They sat in silence again. She was waiting for an answer, but he had a thousand thoughts running through his head at the same time. He found himself unable to imagine a life without Audrey. Yes, they'd only known each other for a few years and their friendship had been through some trials, but his life sure was a heck of a lot better with her in it.

"Are you seriously giving me an ultimatum? You're making me pick between you and Audrey?" his turn to question her.

"Yes. I think Audrey is an obstacle and our relationship can't move forward with her in the way." she explained plainly.

"How would it even be possible to cut her out of my life when we work together? There is no way I could avoid working cases with her. We're both surgical residents in the same year, at the same hospital. I won't give myself a reputation of being difficult to work with" he argued.

"Of course you can continue working with her. But no seeing her outside the hospital." she suggested.

Silence again. He then started to think of all the times they had been out together. Dinners with friends talking about ridiculous cases, the concerts, their movie trips, and even the more simple get-togethers they'd had. He couldn't imagine Audrey not being at any of them.

"I can't, I'm sorry." he finally said after finally organising his thoughts. "Audrey has been a big part of my life over the last four years and I don't want to imagine her not being in it in the future. I can't even begin to imagine how it would affect all four of us and our friendships. How could I ask our friends to choose between us? It would be like losing a limb."

"That's a bit dramatic, don't you think?" she asked, not expecting him to react this way.

"I'm sorry, Louise." he said apologetically.

He really was sorry Louise felt she had to make him choose. He really thought he wanted their relationship to work out, but if cutting Audrey out of his life is what it took to keep Louise, then he'd pick Audrey in a heartbeat.

Louise gave him a sad smile. "I know you are and I knew you'd pick her. You both clearly have feelings for each other. I see it in almost everything you two do. The way you look at each other and speak to each other. I really do hope you guys can work it all out someday." she told him sincerely. Opening the door she turned and simply said "Goodnight, Neil", not knowing what else to say.

"Night." was all Neil could mutter as she closed his door with more force than was needed.

He watched as she let herself in, ready to react if she turned to wave but she just closed the door. Sighing to himself, he started the ignition and headed home to his own dark, empty apartment.

X

The breakup scene at the end is also written by themintjournal as part of her last chapter. Had to separate it out to fit in with the story I'd already written but all credit for that should go right there